- Member Since 21st Jul, 2013
- offline last seen 4 hours ago
StormLuna
Princess Luna is the best princess and Nightmare Moon is the best queen.
StormLuna
Joined 21st Jul, 2013 ·
Offline
Sequels1
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StormLuna · 11k words · 27 13 · 1.6k views
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I bothered to log onto this account for the first time in months to say that this is the most horrid thing I've ever read on this site, and I can only assume you have some childish hatred of men. I await the day you look back at this and cringe.
Ten to one Night Light isn't the only stallion getting a divorce. Shining looked very pissed and will pprobably take Flurry Heart into custody
I'm tempted to read this because of the dislike ratio.
You know what would be funny. if Twilight, Cadance and Shining Armor... how to say this? Were planning to have a three way and Velvet, Celestia and Luna just fucked that up.
not how I wanted to say that but it got the point a cross.
Like i picture that Cadance spent the 183 days trying to get Twilight to say yes and today she finale did. then here comes Velvet to fuck that up. so no three way for Shinning , Cadance or Twilight.
I should not comment when i am tired.
Man she fkd up not only did she tell him the blackmail she had on celestia and Luna but she left a video as proof in the crystal empire of her infidelities and her son can cooberate the story pretty much all the princesses were guilty except cadence they did technically rape her so I don't see why he wouldn't help he'd have to sell out twily of course or would he rather lose cadance....thou cadance is guilty of incest with celestial. I think from the way night said it he's gonna kill velvet when he got back not file for divorce. Oh and the guards can cooberate there trysts to now that I think about it and I'm sure not all of them will side with the princesses..shining was captain of the guards after all so he had some who were loyal I'm betting.
8214336
Well I have plans for this and let’s just say that things won’t flow as easily for Velvet or the princesses as they think it will. Night Light ain’t dumb, he’s going to get the best lawyer in the business.
8213762
I’m going to let you in on something. I am a man and I don’t see how there is any hatred of men in this. I simply find stories like this fun to write, no hatred of men exists here.
8213806
Thanks for the suggestion on Shining Armor wanting a divorce as well. That never even crossed my mind.
8214174 No problem with your comment. I never thought of the three way involving Cadence, Twi and S.A.
8214336
I have a lot of ideas for what will happen next and you gave me more. All I can say is that when the sequel for this comes along, it will likely take a while to write. Sadly for those who like clop, it probably won’t have much, if any. It will be centered around not just one divorce, but two now.
Cadence just told shining to fuck off and take their daughter with him
Every one of these characters is a female dog
love the concept, but the dialogue is stiff and uncharacteristically direct, and the sex is rushed and feels feels like its written by someone who doesnt really have much expedrience with the stuff they're writing about. work on ur narrative voice and ur dialogue, and maybe read some more stories about the subject to get a better idea of how to portray it. with some polish, a lesbian milf-on-princesses story like this coudl be golden.
8214458
Then you're a traitor, in all honesty.
...On second thought, if this is going where I think it's going. Should you work in the quote "If those stallions need a lawyer, then I'll defend them!" you will no longer have some anonymous internet user be disgusted with you. Come on, conform to the demands of some random guy you'll never meet, what are you, chicken?
8221493 Is. Is that your concern with this story.
*breathes*
my dude.
quiet frankly I tried giving this a chance thinking you would make this a bit better from the last one but its just as bad and really I only want night light and shining armor to win they're the one's being fucked over the sex scenes aren't interesting to hold the story up and it's all fucked up really the next story the final one really should be about night light and having him triumph over this he seems to be a more interesting character he's being treated like shit and his wife leaving him and he's just given up and knowing his marriage is ruined because of this and deserves a true happy ending while velvet the 'Protagonist', (Sorry but she's not a protagonist she's an antagonist in the sense and a bitch of a wife) needing some punishment for what she's done If she was killed off I wouldn't feel bad for her at all. This is the only way I can see this story going really I read the part where you said where a guy, but it feels a bit like your lived in a broken home with your mother who was bitter when you were younger I might be wrong it just seems your bias to velvet but the thing is it's too easy for velvet and also makes her unsympathetic compared to night light. since velvet can use the princess to get what she want while Nightlight will clearly have to fight tooth and nail in this situation too get at least justice for what velvet is doing though with the princess it would bring a deus ex machina for her even if night light got the greatest lawyer in the word (Insert Phoenix Wright joke here) it still feels like a one-sided battle.
8224996
I don't appreciate you making assumptions about my past nor do I appreciate you making assumptions about my mother. I get where you're coming from but still, that is in very poor taste and downright disrespectful. Let's say someone made an assumption about your past and an assumption about a family member of yours based off of a story you wrote? Would you take to that very kindly.
Once I do a finish a couple of projects I will do a sequel to this and let's just say, the events that take place will rock the very foundations of Equestria to its core.
8225732
I apologise for making assumptions on your family or past it's just the way the story was written that gave an idea since in most phycological matter the way we write tells us more about how we are when we don't realize and i'll have to check that story out when its done though I will have to see if it blows my mind or a disappointment like this and the other one was
8225746
Apology accepted. In a blog on my page I gave people the option of what I should do next and the sequel to this is in there but last time I checked the Pinkamena story was in the lead with a FlashBurst fic being second. Also included is a Starlight fic with a horrible nightmare of hers.
Tell you what, if the sequel to this doesn't win, I'll do it after I do the winner and like I said, this will rock Equestria to its very core.
8224996
Well the one with Night Light winning is up if you decide to read it. If you want to see Velvet crash and burn, I'm sure you'll like it.
8223065
You want a story where Night Light wins, check out the sequel to this.
8225732
I just want to remind you that you should be thankful that you don't live in the same era as Sigmund Freud and he'll never have the chance to psychoanalyze you.
8262122
I swear to god, DO NOT BE FUCKING WITH ME.
I like the story but why did you make it anthro? This sort of story is the one that should be non-anthro since it's so equine in nature.