• Member Since 8th Dec, 2014
  • offline last seen Mar 23rd, 2018

VitalSpark


Something, something, something, dark side. Something, something, something, complete.

E
Source

Trixie asks Twilight out on a date to say sorry for all the trouble she's caused. But has she really changed? Or does she have an ulterior motive?

Pre-read by vlaarith, ILurvTrixie, and NewUnitedEmpire. Thanks for your input!

Featured Box, 24–27 Jun 2015!

Chapters (1)
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Comments ( 47 )

Ah, I like how trixie speaks in this piece. It fits her well.

This was very sweet. And very Trixie. :rainbowlaugh:

Its good to finally see it.

This was very very sweet and beautiful.:heart:

6128463 Thanks. I knew that the speaking in third person thing would get annoying, so I needed to find a way to nix it early on.

6128757 Thank you.

6128823 Thanks. And thanks for pre-reading.

6129570 And thank you too!

(TLDR: thanks everybody)

THIS GOT FEATURED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

6130311 Holy guacamole! You're right!

6130322 I'M SO HAPPY 4 U!!!!!!!!!!!

6130512 I didn't mean you, but hello anyway. :pinkiesmile:

Only way i have figured out how to give these stories i LOVE, the multiple ways of showing it i feel i can express is to make lots of bookshelves and just add them to them all along with the likes. Congratulations. Again. :pinkiehappy:

6130002 I guess I'm a bit weird, but I like Trixie's typical mode of speech. :trixieshiftright:

Obligatory music reference:

6130616
Don't get me wrong. I do like it. In my headcanon it's because most show ponies would have an announcer saying things like, "and now the marvellous Marveloso will eat a bee sandwich," or whatever, but Trixie either can't afford to hire one, or prefers not to, so she does her own announcements in the same style, referring to herself in the third person, and has gotten so used to it that it spills over into her everyday speech.

But I think in a story that Trixie is herself narrating most of, it gets a bit tiring.

6130595
Thank you.

6130666 You know, I was actually thinking of that song a quite bit while writing it. My tentative title for the story was She's Poison. Though of course, the title doesn't really refer to Trixie, does it? :trixieshiftright:

Imma just leave a comment here because of reasons.

Why is this in Uncommon Shipping Pairs? I thought Twixie was kinda popular.

6131000 My mistake. Gone now.

Pretty good however when Trixie mentioned the poison joke in the beginning then decided to go to Ponyville was pretty subtle. The rest of the times you mentioned what Trixie was planning was more obvious, I just wish the first part was a little more obvious.

6131399 It's subtle deliberately. The impact that Trixie is definitely plotting something is supposed to hit you when she goes to sleep in the evening after she's asked Twilight out on the date.

This is a cute story, but you know poison joke doesn't work like that right?

Poison Joke remedy is a bath, not a drink.

6132297
Like what? You mean the overnight effect in Bridle Gossip versus the more immediate one here? Consider that to be a difference between walking though it and a bit of the pollen rubbing off on your ankles versus getting blasted in the face with a whole barrel full of it, possibly causing you to inhale some. In Daring Do and the Eternal Flower (one of the MLP chapter books), a character eats some Poison Joke and the effect is instantaneous, like what Trixie experiences in my story.

6132339
There may be more than one way to cure it. And possibly different cures are applicable depending on how the poisoning occurred (e.g. walking in the flowers versus inhaling them).

Though ultimately the answer to both of these issues is: I chose what worked best for this particular story.

Aha, you wrote "LyraxLyra"! I knew I recognized your name!
Three good stories, I'd say time for a watch. :pinkiehappy:

6132879 Huh? I did not know that. You learn something new every day. I was also refering to the cure, it's a bath not a drink.

6132983 Yes, that's me. Though I like to think I've written more than three good stories.

6130666 I was thinking more this:

Featured Box, 24 Jun 2015!

Commented, 25 June 2015!

Why would Twilight have suddenly accepted a date with Trixie? Given their minor knowledge of each other, and the only two interactions they've ever had in the show... yeah, I'm not seeing it happening.

And why would Snips and Snails agree to do ANYTHING Trixie asked of them, especially something potentially bad, after the way she'd treated them in both episodes?

None of this is natural to any of the 3 characters who must behave according to Trixie's plans. All 3 would find her behavior suspicious, especially Snips and Snails. She'd have done better to tempt Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon, who are already on their way to villainy.

It was a bit weird at the middle, when Trixie suddenly felt guilty of fooling Twilight into her plan. It was a great story, but I think you can expand on the feelings of Trixie as becoming less revengeful. I did like this and added it to my favorites though, because it's a good story with a good ending.

6133523
Mhm.
Three stories is just the point where I am usually thinking, "I like these stories. I think I had better start watching this person."
:twilightblush:

6134310
Trixie's asking her out as a friend rather than as a romantic date. And what kind of Princess of Friendship would she be if she didn't accept? Besides, at the end of Magic Amulet, Twilight doesn't seem to harbour any remaining animosity towards Trixie.

Regarding Snips and Snails, one of the pre-readers pointed out the same thing, which is why I added this sentence:

They hadn't been keen to assist me with my endeavours, but I may have brought up a certain cosmic space bear they'd brought to town, which I'd taken most of the blame for, and they were eager to make it up to me.

So essentially she just guilt-trips them into helping her out. They're not the sharpest tools in the shed, so probably quite easy to manipulate.

Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon are not villainous. They're petty and occasionally cruel, but they're still children. Lots of kids act like that yet end up perfectly nice people when they grow up. I can't imagine ever using either of these two as serious antagonists in any story. Also they're total Twilight Sparkle fangirls (see Twilight Time), so wouldn't want to be involved in a plot against her.

6135861

Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon are not villainous. They're petty and occasionally cruel, but they're still children.

I like how you say kids are not villeins then say kids are villeins one sentence later :rainbowlaugh:

6137712 I'd wager they're totally gonna end up capturing the CMCs for Starlight Glimmer and turn into evil henchponies... only to fall into the lava pit themselves when Con Mane shows up at the secret volcano base. :trollestia:

Nice and sweet story. I like it.

Friendship conquers all! Even someone as thick-skulled as Trixie. :trixieshiftleft: Nice!

The writing is flawless, the characterisation is spot on...
Yet I didn't find that connection that was needed to make me feel like what I'd read was a good romance fic. I'll be rejecting this in the GoodFic Bin submissions.
Details are here.

PresentPerfect
Author Interviewer

Man, nobody writes Twixie anymore. Glad to see that's not entirely the case. :D

6540890
Oh, I ship Twilight with everypony. :raritywink:

:twilightoops: ~ "Everypony?!"

Trixie and Twilight sitting in a tree K.is.s.i.n.g!

Such lesbians

6705935
Thanks.its not hard to notice how they feel towards eachother.

Old Trixie is long Trixie.

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