• Member Since 20th Apr, 2012
  • offline last seen Tuesday

Phaoray


Editor of several Trixie writers while doing his own stories when possible. Fun Times. Tips are appreciated, but no pressure.

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Things haven’t exactly gone well for Trixie. Ever since the Alicorn Amulet incident she has seen her own fortunes shrink while Twilight's continues to soar. Now Twilight is an Alicorn and Trixie feels left behind. But Trixie has a plan; one Discord is all too willing to aid her in. For a price.

Note: (Immortal Twilight)
Takes place shortly after the defeat of Tirek.

Early chapters Primarily Proofread by Auramane and Slrvertigo. Mid to late chapters edited by myself.

Much thanks to Crowscrowcrow for help along the way with some scenes and ideas.

Reviewed by the Mighty Paul!

Chapters (15)
Comments ( 351 )

good start to a good discord and trixie story.

:trixieshiftleft: we have far too few of these in my opinion.

Goodie goodie! Yes, Discord would certainly see a lot of potential in her. Few ponies as disruptive as Trixie, I'd say. Whether Trixie is romantically interested or just has a need for Twilight to validate her existence in any way, I care not. This will be interesting.

Damn it damn it damn it is is so hard to ask for a trixie twilight rivalry without it turning into twixie

4063680
Not really, but it's all about your own interests. Nearly every Trixie story I read is romance related, and about 90% of everything I favorite or read till the end has shipping. It's what I like so it's what i made. :pinkiehappy:

4063680

i know right, i have yet to see 1 story where the G&PT beats twilight into a pulp.:trixieshiftleft:

4063680 You could always write your own.

4065101 I made an entire group for Trixie fans hoping that at least one of the stories would have trixie being better then twilight with her not being a lover or former student or some crap like that but out of 1200 stories none of them were.

4067189

idk whether to feel relieved that i don't have to search through the entire list for the story i want and just focus on what comes in, or sad enough to just leave the group...:unsuresweetie:

(i'll stay)

This is very interesting

Excelent build up of anticipation! Can't wait for the next chapter and to find out what this mysterious blue orb of energy actually is!

Yet another reason to like Trixie: She's willing to go through any hardship and peril to get what she wants. Carry on, brave Best Pony. I also liked the details about her studying magic outside her specialty and putting it to new and unconventional use, despite her curmudgeonly teachers' ideas. Trixie may not have Twilight's raw power, but she's versatile and incredibly good with what she does have.

More! More!

4067189 Chasing Winter has Trixie as the main protagonist for the full run, with only a brief (friendly) encounter with Princess Twilight Sparkle at the end. Throughout the story, she's heroic, capable and powerful as well as snarky and cynical as Trixie should be. Trixie is also not shipped with anypony, never expresses particularly strong opinions on Purplesmart, and gets to show off skills and stuff that would definitely make the Princess raise her eyebrows.

I think it fits your expectations. Try it.

4091823 read it, but thats my problem there are so many trixie stories you think one would have her be better then twilight at least one

4065937 the reason I don't write my own story is that I want to be surprised that's why I read

4091873 Don't complain about people not catering to your needs then. If there's a dearth of Trixie stories that you like you can only actively work towards rectifying that by writing one yourself.

Ah, Trixie. You are so clever. Unfortunately, it's the kind of cleverness that so often gets you into trouble and so rarely gets you out of it.

Absolutely loving this. Also, not sure if the author's read the IDW comics yet, but the latest issue, #17, addressed the same problem: terrible guardian beasts need to be fed regularly. Oops.

4111604
Glad you're enjoying this. Trixie's actions and willingness to work with Discord are indeed getting her into deeper trouble despite her success so far. Next chapter will explain about what she has stolen. :pinkiehappy:
Haven't read any of the comics actually. Philosopher01 insists I need to, but it'll be a bit till I order the bundles as I prefer anything I read to at least take a half hour or more. Probably why most of my favorites are over 10k words.

4111604

Admitly, Luna´s incompetence helped.

“Trixie guesses she should be thankful that Luna only thought to protect the door and forgot how much easier it’d be to go through the wall...”

:facehoof:

4111604 o0 there is 17 now..iv just read up to 8

4113798 Seventeen issues of the main comic, ten issues of the Micro comic, and so far three issues of the "Friends Forever" series, with more planned. (The sixth issue is about Trixie and Rainbow Dash!)

This is so much better than the usual dearth of Trixie stories I have read. Usually they go with the whole, "I'm secretly in love with Twilight/Trixie." then they kiss and suddenly everything is lovey dovey.

Regardless of Trixie's feelings, she sees Twilight first and foremost a rival. You've captured that wonderfully. And Discord being Discord... well he's being true to form. Anyone who says chaos has no plan has never been able to see the magic pictures in TV static. (Do they even have static anymore?)

I'm rooting for Trixie here. (Well, obviously I would be, but even without personal bias I'd take her side.) Luna isn't exactly garnering any sympathy with her over-the-top viciousness.

Loving this.

Celestia tsked at Luna “Twilight has never failed to learn a lesson I’ve placed before her sister. I am positive she’ll learn this one before she becomes truly upset with me. And if not I will have others help nudge her in that direction as always. Twilight is too much like a daughter to me to hurt her intentionally like that.”

Yup. Sending Twi to those crazy adventures and dangerous missions against mad gods and evil unicorns, passing her Starswirl´s spellbook without telling the poor mare the consequences of ascension, like immortality or political power, or giving her the option of saying NO...
... you didn´t learn anything of the Nightmare incident, do you? :trollestia:

“So you mean, my friends, they all could be….?”
Celestia nodded, though her eyes held a soft sadness to them “They could Twilight, but Luna and I have no plans to carry out the ritual on them. Becoming an Alicorn is as much of a blessing as it is a curse. Could you see Rarity watching Sweetie Bell age and die before her eyes? Applejack doing the same with Apple Bloom? Not to mention the upheaval that is still going on at your own recent coronation. To add five more alicorns to that list would panic the country to no end. You alone were trained and taught to one day join my sister and I Twilight. I’m sorry if it hurts, but that is how it must stay.”

DFQ?! So Twilight doesn´t have family or friends she will miss after the inevitable departure? How did you prepare Twi to endure losing the ponies YOU manipulate into befriend the day you sent your "faithful student" to Ponyville for the Summer Celebration? And why alicorns must automatically be crowned into princes/princesses? In the words of Monthy Python "strange women lyin' in ponds distributin' swords is no basis for a system of government.":flutterrage:

“Do not get us wrong Discord. We believe you are right in what you said to Twilight. But it does not mean we think you any less of a dick for saying it.”

Of course, blame Discord for pointing out the elephant in the room, your highness.:ajbemused:

4143323

Yup. Sending Twi to those crazy adventures and dangerous missions against mad gods and evil unicorns, passing her Starswirl´s spellbook without telling the poor mare the consequences of ascension, like immortality or political power, or giving her the option of saying NO...

It builds character. :pinkiehappy:

DFQ?! So Twilight doesn´t have family or friends she will miss after the inevitable departure? How did you prepare Twi to endure losing the ponies YOU manipulate into befriend the day you sent your "faithful student" to Ponyville for the Summer Celebration?

Hey, she has her sister n law. :trollestia:

And why alicorns must automatically be crowned into princes/princesses?

Bah, guess I'll give one of your questions a semi-serious answer. If you could make someone into an immortal for all time, with the power to fairly easily take out most creatures that stand in your way over anything, you would be pretty frigging picky. Or at least I would.
Plus the big issues of what being an Alicorn represents to the world at this point. At one point, they may have been considered just a powerful race. Now? An unknown Alicorn could pop out of the woodwork, claim to be a Princess, and the majority of ponies would believe them. Even if they didn't call themselves a princess, ponies would bow anyways and not question whatever they say. They represent rulership in Equestria at this point so even if they aren't officially announced as a Princess, its most likely they will be treated as one.
And admittedly, if you molded this public outlook on Alicorns intentionally, would you really want five others not acting like Royalty ruining it? Showing the public how flawed Alicorns can really be?

In the words of Monthy Python "strange women lyin' in ponds distributin' swords is no basis for a system of government.":flutterrage:

Bloody peasant...:trixieshiftleft:

Of course, blame Discord for pointing out the elephant in the room, your highness.:ajbemused:

I know right!? That elephant was doing it damndest not to be noticed and Discord just ups and goes 'Da faq's up with that elephant?". :facehoof:

4143095
I kinda agree on the Luna thing. I tend to think of her as the more aggressive of the two sisters, and the one who used to be in charge of the weightier punishments. Maybe another reason why she wasn't the bearer of kindness, and why when she parties, she parties hard.

4143804 I think a lot of the conflict people make over the whole "alicorns get to be princesses" thing is that the viewers' idea of a princess (looks pretty in a dress and gets married off) is not the same as Equestria's idea of a princess (chosen by destiny as a leader and power).

For that matter, some fans wonder why Twilight doesn't seem to have any royal duties (and in a lot of fics, she actually gets to handle unspecified "royal matters" and paperwork off-screen just to 'rectify' this) or rule anything, and think that this means she's not a real princess. To which I'd argue... she's the Princess of Magic. Besides defending Equestria against threats, she'll have duties far higher on the cosmological scale. Why should she have to deal with paperwork and holding mundane court when Celestia has done just fine on her own for the last thousand years? She's got bigger fish to fry.

4144028
Yeah, I try to go with that outlook on them as well. Twilight deals with alot of the threats to Equestria using her powers and is looked on in a very positive light to the masses. Celestia's personal student, leader of the elements of Harmony, etc,etc. Right now, that is her duty. If Celestia or Luna went out to handle it, then Twilight would need to take over their duties. I guess in a less positive light you could look at Twilight as an enforcer for Equestria almost.
And as you said, she is if anything the Princess of Magic. So what does she do? Studies frigging magic and makes new spells! And maybe for comedy sakes she is also in charge of Equestria's library policies. :pinkiehappy:

4144177 One of my headcanons is that Celestia has essentially fine-tuned most of Equestria's bureaucratic machinery over the last several centuries so she could handle it herself without being overwhelmed. Then Luna returns, and with her handling a few duties just so she can feel like she's contributing, Celestia has it even easier, which is why she can waste time on dropping in on Ponyville now and then, gorge herself on cake, indulge in her student's project, etc.

And then Twilight becomes a princess too, and there's literally no reason for her to have to get involved. Especially since the mysterious six-key box seems to be a much more intriguing subject for her to focus her attention on.

Oh I cannot wait to see how Twilight reacts when she finds out it's Trixie! :twilightsmile:

"...An exhibitionist perhaps? "Discord’s eyebrows wiggled...

'sides that, I didn't notice anything egregiously wrong besides my forgetting to upvote this story!

Okay, finished this up. Overall... more positive than negative. I liked Trixie. Really liked her. Good concept, good execution...

And thank you SO much for reminding me why at the end of Magical Mystery Cure I felt Celestia needed a punch to the face with the Infinity Gauntlet. Fuck you, Celly! Fuck you with an antimatter-powered chainsaw, you manipulative bitch!

this was wonderful.

Comment posted by Raistlin deleted Apr 3rd, 2014

Knowing the Lulamoon’s, there’ll be other chances.
Luna quietly flew away, making one last pass over the dreamscape.
__________________________________________________________________________________________
“G-get your tongue off of me…” Trixie groused as the sheets became tangled over her form from her struggling. “You F-fucking…psychotic…moon…bitch.

:trixieshiftleft: "Sorry, Luna, but Trixie is into purple" :twilightblush:

Did Celestia think to maybe, I don't know, actually ask the others if they wanted to be Alicorns; you know, instead of just deciding what's best for them?

It's sad, but true, that you never really can know another person on such a deep and intimate level as to know how they'd react in any given situation, if only because people constantly change; you can learn more about someone, but really, truly knowing them is a completely different kettle of fish. Many people don't even know themselves, let alone others. And just walking in another person's shoes isn't enough either, we are complex, contradictory beings, and cannot be so simply broken down into easy to sort categories.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that it really bugs me that she's not even giving them a choice, just a 'Yeah, I could make you all immortal, but it's kind of problematic for me right now, so I won't; thanks for saving my life, my kingdom, and everything I love several times over though! I'll be sure to give a touching eulogy at your funeral.'

4175084
4180367
Glad to see I'm getting this reaction. Means I'm writing Celestia the way I wanted. In case anyone hasn't noticed yet, most of the ponies/Draconequus's in this story are lying about one thing or another. Or at least leaving out a few things. Mind you I do like Celestia and Luna, but I can't see them not having their own personal agenda's and plans like Discord has, just there's are more about Equestria's protection than screwing with ponies.

4182895

I´m more curious about the elephant. He is up to something :pinkiecrazy:

I'm really liking this so far. It's a very interesting story and it flows nicely. :twilightsmile:
Just one thing; Twilight isn't immortal. I get that she had to be or else this story would have had to go a bit differently, but the writers confirmed that since she wasn't born as an alicorn, but turned into one using magic, her lifespan is that of a normal pony's.
But besides that little thing, it's great! Keep it up!

4212507
Well, looking it up, I can only find one of the writer's stating she isn't immortal, and it was never stated in the show so I kinda consider the 'immortal or not' aspect of Twilight to mostly be an individual's head canon at this point. :pinkiehappy:

Poor Twilight :rainbowlaugh:

I always get Roadrunner and Coyote vibes from Twilight and Discord. All Twilight needs is an ACME account.

She's so unprepared for an amorous Trixie.

Oh, and Luna's beard? Did not need that image :facehoof: granted, grooming habits were different a thousand years ago.

4219248
Heh, sorry, I just had the urge to do a joke involving that horrible phrase. :twilightsheepish:

I do like how comical you can make things with these characters much like the Warner Bros. ones. Multiple times in the show they bounce back like nothing, and with Twi being an Alicorn I can only assume it's easier for her than most. Besides maybe Pinkie. I feel like you could flatten Pinkie with a train and turn around to see her standing next to you. :pinkiecrazy:

No my lazy little friend, there is still a couple of ingredients we need before you can join Twilight in the mile high club.

Kinky. I bet clouds are really comfy for that.

Second, well, let’s say you do become a alicorn and cause havoc for the two princesses; unintentionally or not

It should be 'become an alicorn'

The ship continued picking up speed as it continued across the water and finally into the Marehattan airspace

Manehattan?

The alicorn looked at Teller for a few second longer before inhaling and blowing out a small fire on her bedraggled mane.

A few seconds?

Really love the story, it's literally the only thing on my mind :twilightsmile:

Trixie is thankful for your concern, but she assures you that she is feeling better then she has in a long time.

...better than she has in a long time...

You wouldn’t believe how much easier there pollen makes it to get ponies to accept there more chaotic side.

You wouldn’t believe how much easier their pollen makes it to get ponies to accept their more chaotic side.

I really like this story, I hope Trixie makes it to the alicorn club.

4231146
4222915
Fixed and fixed. Thank you, despite my obsessive looking over the spelling and use of the proper words, I miss things. Glad you are both enjoying the story. :pinkiehappy:

I finally got around to reading this one. Oh my do I wish I had gotten to it sooner.

And to my delight I even get to indulge in a bit of friendly mimicry. ^^

Trixie was a little uneasy with how quickly Discord had distinguished her magic

dis·tin·guished
: known by many people because of some quality or achievement
: making someone seem important and worth respect

Though it would be understandable for Trixie to be uneasy if Discord praised her magic, or said anything really, I think this was meant to be extinguished?
(The possibility exists I am just misreading entirely, and I'll have egg on my face. But eh I feel like omelet anyways.)

I was almost sure Trixie was going to turn around and find Twilight/Spike laughing at her, right after exclaiming her burning need for Twi's attention.
Discord teaming up with Trixie, or using her as his plaything, is not something I've seen before. I like where this is going, and I have to wonder if Discord figures that being reformed means he has to be more subtle in his approach, claiming plausible deniability with 'It wasn't me. I was just helping, that's what you want me to do right?'. Or if he has no intention of giving Trixie any real help and knows her quest is doomed from the start, only leading her on for his amusement.
I got a lot of laughs from reading this so far. And fortunately plenty of chapters to catch up on.^^

4242414

And to my delight I even get to indulge in a bit of friendly mimicry. ^^

Don't you have a chapter to put up today? Don't you have a Trixie to kill? Shoo,shoo. :pinkiehappy:

But yeah, that was an error, everytime someone points one out I start planning a time to look through all of the chapters again. Still, thanks for noticing and pointing it out, might make a war of this with you. :rainbowwild: You're beginning chapters have errors I didn't point out, but I tend to just comment on the latest chapters of a story.

Glad you're enjoying the story. I've read tons of Trixie and I am trying to avoid over-used tropes with my writing when I can. I've seen stories where Trixie and Discord are involved, but none where they willingly team up for anything. As for whether or not Discord is playing with Trixie or actually helping her, you'll have to find out down the line. :pinkiehappy:

Also glad you find it comical, I've had next to no comments on the comedy and was starting to worry that I wasn't hitting the mark for people.

4243908

Heh I do indeed,
Oh goodness my early chapters are a mess. I literally learned grammar as I went..
If it's later chapters. Bring it.:rainbowdetermined2:

I thought you worked the humor really well, I'm surprised nobody told you this.
Then again I suppose I was only conscious of the fact because I was trying to hide my snickering while reading at work, and failing badly enough that I had to pause reading at times. :rainbowlaugh:

I've since also really come to enjoy your take on Trixie's magic. Less powerful than Twilight but creative and unorthodox.

Wow, there was a lot of good funny moments but damn if I didn't get chills when we got to Luna's Laboratory. Each room was creepy on a whole different level.
The chairs were horrifying! Though less so once Luna clarified they were corpses, if you believe her. However I am not quire sure I believe her, more like she's telling herself that to keep sane. Oh, I am sure they were corpses when she was done, but generally one would examine a corpse on an autopsy table, not strapped unable to escape from a chair.:trixieshiftright:

Now for revenge! :flutterrage:
... Is what I would say, if I actually found anything beyond minor nitpicks that aren't even wrong.
Okay you win this round, but it is only to lull you into a false sense of security

She peered into the next room, seeing it to be made of rough, hewn stone.

Could perhaps consider using 'roughly hewn' or 'rough-hewn'. It currently reads as 'rough and hewn' which feels just bit odd.

Gasping Luna reformed, not having spread herself out over such a length of land in a very long time.

Technically correct, but could potentially benefit from rephrasing.

Well at least I tried.:trixieshiftleft:

I was almost sure we were going to see Trixie find remains of Nightmare Moons essence, but it looks like it is actually something different. The idea that Nightmare Moon had been in control for a while before the actual conflict and doing all this is interesting, I wonder what she made. Though judging by the note left on the jar, what Trixie stole was probably an earlier invention from Luna and not Nightmare Moon.

4250249

Okay you win this round

Mwahahahaha! Was there ever any doubt? :trixieshiftleft: :trixieshiftright:

Technically correct, but could potentially benefit from rephrasing.

"Luna reformed and started gasping for air. Her body ached a little, not having been spread out over such a length of land in a very long time."

That's the best rephrase I could come up with, that was one of those lines I had to look long and hard at to try to make more sensible in the past.

The idea that Nightmare Moon had been in control for a while before the actual conflict and doing all this is interesting

Yeah, I know the show doesn't look like it follows that line, but I like the thought that Nightmare hid herself and made plans before the eventual conflict. I don't plan on getting into it, but to be fair to Luna, the whole 'corpses bound to chairs' thing could have been Nightmare's experiments. As I don't plan on getting into it unless it somehow fits in the next chapters I don't have to make a decision. :pinkiehappy:

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