• Member Since 7th Oct, 2012
  • offline last seen Mar 21st, 2017

Dreamscape


"1/4 hipster, 3/4 kawaii"

Sequels1

T

This story is a sequel to Not a Monster


The infamous battle of the bands brought plenty of change to Canterlot High School and our protagonist, for better or for worse. As his relationship with Sunset grows sour, he attempts to start a new chapter in his life. To do this, he turns to none other than the recently defeated "Dazzlings," even though he is almost certain the decision will end badly.

Cover Art by Akuama

Featured 11/12/2014 Thanks for the support!

Chapters (9)
Comments ( 114 )

You my friend...Have guts!....I like that! :pinkiehappy:

Well, that was a depressing ending. :fluttershysad:

Who is the he? your summary doesn't say.

Please, tell me that there is a sequel to this in the works. :applecry::pinkiesad2::fluttercry::raritydespair:

There is only one cheap racing game that I know of which is hilariously bad.
greleases.com/bg_bilder/jimmie-johnsons-anything-with-an-engine-ps3-boxart.jpg
That cover art always brings a smile to my face.:pinkiehappy:

Wow, dude just can't seem to catch a break. Talk about a series of unfortunate events.

I honestly feel like you're just marking this as complete to just screw with us.

5259635 it actually says "sequel to" so I guess the he is the same from that story... Don't really know since I'm just goin to start reading this now.

:fluttershysad:wow .. you left me so sad when you finish reading your story that I finally arrived I could not believe what had me miss but eventually I loved it I hope you have more sequels but it would also be well advised to upload a chapter at a time because if you gain the whole story and how it bored because you know you have a little suspense would come end well lol I think not but otherwise excellent story

a greeting:twilightsmile:

(sorry for my bad English .. I do not speak it very well):facehoof:

That ending:pinkiesad2: Right in the feelings :fluttershbad:

They only needed a push in the right direction.

:pinkiehappy: YESSSS!!!

Well, I guess I only ever really started siting with them because of Sunset.

It should be sitting :twilightsmile:

La Yegua Grasa=The Fat Mare

:rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh:

Oh crap, that's good. :pinkiehappy:

Its interesting. This is totally not the way most people would go, breaking up the pairing they spent the previous story working on. But honestly? It makes sense. Sunset would have latched onto anyone who was nice to her at that point, she was clearly very emotionally vulnerable. But after the events Rainbow Rocks shes not in that position anymore. And I don't really see the protagonist as the kind of guy she would normally go for. Sunset is clearly very intelligent, she was Celestia's student and was smart enough to last years in a strange world with very little problems, and I cant really see her in a long term relationship with some one who wasn't particularly intelligent. The protagonist, from what I remember of the first story, didn't show any signs of being more than average in the smarts department.

So yeah. I'm okay with this.

5261959
Wow, you read my mind :ajsmug:

5262065
I blame my time on Tvtropes. I've gotten good at this.

5261487 I thought those words looked familiar :derpytongue2:

5261943 Agreed. I NEED A BETTER ENDING.

EVEN IF IT'S: HE KILLED HIMSELF, THE END. I NEED CLOSURE!

5261471
Thanks, it's been corrected

Visiting the dazzlings apartment what could possibly go wrong? :D

"since" not the same as "sense"
Thorough all the fics i read this is the most occurring mistake, here it is in the last paragraph of the first chapter.

It made complete since.

"since" refers to past event, as in something happened in the past and still has an effect.
example.
Ever since that accident i can't walk straight.

"sense" refers to multiple things but in your sentence the protagonist gained a clarity in mind as he understood something ergo things started to make sense for him.

Sorry about this, but this mistake is so often made that u just had to point it out.

Wow, I'm a fan for true endings but wow. I would ask if there was a sequel where everything ends well and everyone happy but only because I'm so used to seeing that and rarely see endings like this. All I say is this: Do what you see fit, be it make a sequel or leave it as it is. I'm fine with both.

5262502
Thanks for pointing that misspelling out, but wow, there's no need to act pretentious about it. I know the difference between the two words, I simply misspelled it.

The girls were close, and it made since due to the fact that they had been together for so long, even before they came to my world.

Sense, Sense,Sense, Sense,Sense, Sense,Sense, Sense,Sense, Sense,Sense, Sense,Sense, Sense,Sense, Sense,Sense, Sense,Sense, Sense,Sense, Sense,Sense, Sense,Sense, Sense,Sense, Sense,Sense, Sense,Sense, Sense,Sense, Sense,Sense, Sense,Sense, Sense,Sense, Sense,Sense, Sense,Sense, Sense,Sense, Sense,Sense, Sense,Sense, Sense,Sense, Sense,Sense, Sense,Sense, Sense,Sense, Sense,Sense, Sense,Sense, Sense,Sense, Sense,Sense, Sense,Sense, Sense,Sense, Sense,Sense, Sense,Sense, Sense,Sense, Sense,Sense, Sense,Sense, Sense,Sense, Sense,Sense, Sense,Sense, Sense,Sense, S.

Get it?

5262707
I feel like I should leave it because you're being such a cunt about it

5262406

Agreed.

I can't stand stories that leave open endings like this.

It's not new, it's not clever, nor does it make me wonder " what the MC will do for the rest of his life?" It just leaves me feeling bitter by the fact that I have no closure to recover from this.

Even if it does resolve with him committing suicide. I'd rather read that than have this as an ending.

5262732
First of all there no need for the c word.
Secondly, i wouldn't know if English language is your first language or if you're even good with it, there are plenty non English writers around here, so u couldn't be sure if you knew the difference.
Thirdly, obviously you don't know the meaning of some words as what you did there is not a misspelling as you call it, this is a mispeling, what you did there is a blatant mistake that makes me mentally cringe every time i notice.
Lastly i did apologize in my last post for pointing it out, but as i wrote it's an error that's somehow hurts my brain.
I can understand misspellings, grammar or structural mistake but that never.

Well, that's about half an hour of my life wasted for a crappily depressing ending... At the very least, it's crappy because it's too open and doesn't give closure. That's my opinion.

Not sure if I like the ending or not. Having the Dazzlings turn out to still be evil was fine, as was the protagonist ending up a loser; but there is no closure to the story at all, and that isn't OK.

I remember reading your first story, and it was pretty good.
Didn't know you were going to make a second one! *excited*

5261487
Actually you're wrong.
La yegua grasa means: The Greasy Mare
Grasa is the spanish word for grease (or in this case greasy) if it was the fat mare then the name would've been different
La Yegua Gorda

My thoughts on the ending: The character is telling himself "I'm not a monster."So therefore the "monster" in this series is the character and not the former villains.

:pinkiehappy:Can you make a part three please PLEASE:pinkiehappy: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

5263035

Yeah... I kinda see what you mean. I didn't mind that the villains didn't turn good. I didn't even mind the downer ending. But it really does feel like the story isn't quite finished yet. Like there's supposed to be another chapter following this one.

Still, it was a gutsy place to end the story on. I can definitely respect that.

I hope and trust there will be another sequel to this, right?

This sequel shows promise, young one.

....this should be good...ooh, ooh, what if Sunset gets JEALOUS?! :trixieshiftright: That would be delicious!!

I feel like the protagonist is almost quite similar to Shinji Ikari.

And I think both him and Sunset are in the wrong.

...This is why I don't up vote this story. All is good until the end. No sane, normal, not-foolish man would not stop obey the women who used them after they know they are being used. I understand about drama element but this is just too unrealistic it hurt the plot and ending.

Sorry man, but this won't do at all...unless of course there are more than meet the eyes that was reveal in part 3, but until then my opinion will remained unchanged.

unconcluded ending...

No desirable resolution...

urge to kill... rising...

waiting patiently for Part 3.

I'm one of the ppl who didn't like Not A Monster 1. I didn't downvote it, because it did many things right. But I didn't upvote it either.

This story already seems like it's going to be better. While the previous story felt like wish-fulfillment to an extent, just in this chapter 1 you seem to show that you really understand the dynamics of these relationships. I think I'm going to be upvoting after I read some more chapters.

I understand exactly what Sunset is subconsciously, but correctly, doing. It's both wise and cruel: "Don't hang out with losers; get out of that comfort zone. Go hang out with only winners." A natural winner like Sunset understands that instinctively, whether she's being a bad or a good girl.

5261959
You said almost everything I would have said.
Except, I wouldn't say that Sunset would only be attracted to someone intelligent.
I think, in her right frame of mind, she would be attracted to someone powerful and charismatic, or larger-than-life. That is, someone with great individual agency. That quality does have an element of intelligence, of course.
The protag is too ordinary for her, and she's smart enough to see it, and decisive enough to act upon it as soon as she sees it.

Ok. This is getting too good. Upvote.

After reading Not A Monster, I had thought that this author is another one of those self-insert types, only knowing how to write 1 type of thing. But Under Their Spell is proving that he can write a good fic with real characters.

MLai #46 · Nov 13th, 2014 · · 1 · Tacos ·

I was afraid the author was switching from a self-insert Sunset harem to a self-insert Dazzlings harem. But the more I read, the more I feel that this story is the real thing. It's a real story (and a good one so far, at that), rather than just a wish-fulfillment one-shot.

At this point, there are so many dramatic possibilities. I'm gonna marathon this bad girl! :raritystarry:

This story is waaaaaaay too underrated right now. Hopefully time will help it become more read and popular.
Because it is really good. I'm having mucho new respect for this author, and my previous disrespect has evaporated. Gonna have to end up following him.

That's the way, Protag. Use them like they're using you. Just don't get too addicted, because they can drop you like a rock at any moment.
But something tells me he's already too addicted. Idiot. :ajbemused:

This is shooting up to be one of my favorite EqG fictions, full stop.

The Sirens remind me of Jean-Paul Sartre's No Exit, 3 damned souls doomed to eternally torture each other. To cling to one another even as they despise each other. There is no goodness left in them while in a Hell like that, only seething impotent rage.

They are pretty much one person, one filled with self-loathing, constantly filling their own emptiness at the expense of others.

And this Protag continues to be so weak and useless I wish the Sirens would just tear him apart right there. But hey, I felt the same maddening frustration with Holden Caulfield... so the author is intentionally on-target.

MLai #49 · Nov 13th, 2014 · · 1 · Lost ·

5265029
That's exactly it. This Protag is not only foolish, he's also a gutless loser. That's who he is, at this point in his life. That's why MCs like him or Shinji piss us off so much even as we remain riveted to the screen.
He may become a better man as he grows older. Or he may stay a loser for the rest of his worthless sorry life. And it all depends on himself.

5263792
I didn't have much of an opinion of you after Not A Monster; the only reason I bother to finish it was because I was starved for anything Sunset.

But after reading this story, you have gained a loyal follower. I will mark you down so that when you eventually make NAM3, I don't miss it.
I will devour every chapter even while I curse the spineless gutless useless worthless Protag.

Oh, and THANK YOU for depicting the Sirens not only as unrepentent villains, but also as wielding their uncomfortably true-to-life brand of villainy. Ha ha, they're both the dream and nightmare of every desperate Nice Guy out there. Too many brony authors fan-wank themselves up to a furor over Sonata just because she's adorable. Think with your brain, she's a man-eater just like her sisters.

5259310 Your profile pic is the LEAST appropriate to be seeing after reading this. just sayin'.

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