Afterword
Treasure in the West
A Short Afterword
Hello, everyone! This is DiveBomb, here to say a few things about this story and its readers.
Treasure in the West has been one of those projects that I have had a large amount of fun with, simply because of its concepts and character development. As most of you may know, a lot of the ideas were derived from my profession and love of Old West weaponry and history. Mostly weaponry, obviously. One example being my personal Winchester Model 1894; Thumper. That's right, a gun made its way as a self-insert. Who knew.
As for the characters, there's a few things I'd like to say about them as well. After I finished Broken, I wanted to do a story that explored the Western areas of Equestria, something that (unfortunately) hadn't really been done all that much. Well, to my knowledge, anyway. So of course, I immediately wanted Braeburn to star in this idea, mostly because I loved his character in the show and wished he had more airtime. At that thought, there was another one-shot pony that I wanted to become a real character, and not just a storybook protagonist. From there, I formulated a theory on how these two completely different ponies could somehow find each other and set out on some kind of adventure. Of course, that was how the story was born. There were a slew of other things that helped craft every aspect of the story, but no one wants to read about that. I guess this part will be kept brief.
From here, I would like to thank a couple of people. First off, I would like to show my gratitude by thanking JohnPerry, for doing an amazing job pre-reading this fic, as well as helping me by bopping me on the head with a rolled-up newspaper whenever I wrote something that didn't make sense. Second, to the pre-reader that allowed this story to be posted on Equestria Daily. As you can imagine, TITW didn't make it the first run through, and I have no problem admitting that. This person did a great job pointing out the gaping holes in the plot, as well as a few other giant errors. So thanks for that buddy!
And of course, you, the readers. You've all been great not only saying what is good about the story, but also by pointing out errors I may have missed, or even critique in places where it was needed. Just because I don't reply to everything doesn't mean I don't learn from it. But ultimately, I appreciate your patience and kind words, so thank you for that. You guys are awesome.
-DiveBomb
...Oh, and one more thing...
I hope you're all going to be ready for a wild ride.
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A sequel?
TAUNTING US?
I'm ready for it
t1.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTgPQVr4VFqCl7BrwvEq1GZTZr6pJXeD1X5tLeIRAvotRlw6W-I
*blinks* That's it? That's all the treasure was? Just some gold and Cunning's journal...
He built that absurdly complicated system of traps, spent Celestia only knows how much on it, set it up so that even his descendents could be killed by his traps... just for that?
I mean, for Celestia's sake, at least the treasure in "The Goonies" was worth the effort! One-Eyed WIllie wasn't even planning for his descendents to get through, as he knew he wouldn't have any.
Wow, talk about anti-climactic. I am disappoint.
1035824 there might be something IN that journal...
1035838 But the story as it is, is over. Without even a hint of that. If that's going to be the reason eventually then there MUST be something to clue us in somehow. Otherwise, we can only assume Cunning was just a bastardly self-important troll with delusions of grandeur.
1035824
I think Cunning was possibly a sociopath/psychopath, hence all the crazy clues and traps. He had his own twisted logic.
-----
Looking forward to this wild ride of a sequel
1035908 they never read it. just saying... or maybe Bareburn will need to rescue Daring or something.
1035928 But really, someone that crazy never has the intelligence to put together such an intricate array of traps. That takes a cool, calculating mind. The picture I'm getting of Cunning is extremely mixed and muddled. It seems like the actions of a group rather than an individual. And indeed, there's no way he could have built this elaborate set-up on his own. That would be quite impossible. It's why I expected more from the treasure, and at least a hint of what's in the journal. This was far too much for one stallion to accomplish in a lifetime. I can tell you just from watching shows on stonework that it would've taken a team of dozens decades to build that array, even if the tunnels were already in place and they spent all their waking hours on it. If they weren't all in on hiding whatever it was, then that implies Cunning would have had to kill them all to keep the silence, elsewise they would have passed the knowledge to their descendents and how to simply avoid the traps by going through the backdoor.
BUT, if he was that psychopathic, it would have been obvious to those who were working with him, and the first thing they would have done is ganged up and killed him. No matter how good a shot he is, one against dozens doesn't stand a chance. And he'd have to sleep sometime. Wait til he's utterly worn out, then shoot him with every gun they could hold all at once.
No, the only thing that makes the slightest sense is that he had a group working with him to hide something of either mind-boggling value, or terrifyingly dangerous. The latter makes the most sense to me as it would be much easier to keep the group from spilling the beans if they were all of the mindset that it's something nopony should find, and Cunning left clues for his descendants without the rest of the group knowing. They'd all have kept to themselves after that, which would explain why Cunning became nothing but a legend. But if it's the journal.. why wouldn't they have simply burned it to keep it secret? Ah! Unless the mystery treasure was MEANT to be put there, but Cunning swapped it with his journal and enough gold to fund the next phase of the hunt for those who were 'cunning' enough to find it!
So, the only way to make any sense of this end is for that journal to contain a hint of some other secret hidden elsewhere. And as I've said, without even a lil' teensy hint of that in this story, I can't help but scratch my head over what the point was.
1035823
1036013
I understand your point and the author should probably answer your concerns but what I would say from the point of an author myself is to point to this http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/WillingSuspensionOfDisbelief.
Already you are being asked to believe that pastel colored ponies with a very high level of intelligence exist and are not like real ponies. Why then would you point to a real life (human) documentary for 'facts' on the subject? Also magic exists in this universe and thus one really powerful unicorn can do the work of what would take a group of humans faster. All he needs is a unicorn lackey (or a few) with crooked moral compasses to help out (and then maybe be 'disposed of')
Also there is another 'trope' in fiction where being a psychopath does not mean instant crazy and irrational. I've seen many works of fiction where the main villain was undeniably insane and evil but they could lie and act like the perfect most rational character when they needed to. A good psychopath knows how to show the world a facade of sanity and needs to have their wits about them cold and calculating to plan out all their schemes and get away with it (their logic may be twisted morally but it is still a form of logic and thus rational to them).
Remember psychopaths are not just all ax crazy,the most successful (and dangerous) ones are the fiercely intelligent ones hence the name 'Cunning the Colt'.
Also see :http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/MagnificentBastard.
Sequel? dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_Lyra.png
This story has put Daring DoxBraeburn at the top of my favorite ships
Heh, I wasn't expecting a shoutout. You're welcome, for what it's worth, Divebomb.
1035823 THIS
Sequel please
There is no combination of letters that can describe the noise I made upon reading the last line.
1036192 Actually, the fic where the psychopath is rational annoy the heck out of me as well. I can't suspend my disbelief unless the story makes me want to.
And really, this is something that can be solved very easily in this fic. One or two lines, the museum curator reaching some point in the journal and gasping. Just that and nothing more would tie up everything and give the reason for all the excessive measures taken to hide what amounts to a miniscule treasure.
(more gold than this has been found of Roman era coins just hidden in a clay pot in a farmer's field in Britain, for instance) I'm just saying, there must be more to the treasure than that.
the great and powerful trixie is alway ready for a "wild ride"
1036478
We'll have to agree to disagree because rational psychopaths (those that are very clever but morally twisted) can be very complex and interesting characters in my opinion. I think he just had a twisted sense of humor and logic.
But all I can give is my opinion on the subject and I don't want to be taking up the author's page with my own assumptions on their story's canon.
*sunglasses*
Let's do this.
hey divebomb are you by any chance a superstitious person because I noticed you wrote 13 chapers for TITW
then added this one which you could have written as a blog post
Yipi ki ya
Let's do this
1036990 Wanted something more permanent
*Smiles a wide smile* Sequel
.....More? Please? *puppy dog eyes*
I want a sequel. there should of been a romance you were clearly hinting at it.
Wild ride, you say?
Where we're going, we don't need roads.
1035824 the real treasure is the DaringxBraeburn ship fic, aka. The Sequel.
Edit: What exactly are you expecting? Precious gems? Gems have as much monetary value as a Porta-Potty in Equestria.
A sequel? More shooty Spaghetti Western Indiana Jones starring Daring Do and Breaburn the Stampede?
scranton.mylittlefacewhen.com/media/f/img/mlfw817_1316910660458704.jpg
1038810 Well they live in a magical land! Maybe some powerful enchaned object, a rare artifact of pre-Princess days, the mummified remains of Meagan...
There could have been all kinds of cool and/or troll things to put in that treasure!
1038998 I concur.
1042612 Pfff ha! Such a great show.
and with that last line, you've caught us. let's make it happen; and hey, if you gain enough traction, you could bring breburn back, like they're (supposedly) doing with trixie. CTC is also an interesting character. His personality is both contradicting and mysterious. while he did apparently rob and steal, he also used ancient tombs and lost relics which were far older than he appears to be. So could this bandit have a bee looking for something? or was he trying to hide something aside from his loot? I guess it doesn't matter, I just look forward to the sequel. keep goin and stay golden^^
Ah yes, sequel. Someone will be up in the feature box with plenty of views. Cheers, mate. You'll be paying off BraeDo in spades. A good show to come, and sure to be the clarion call for everyone. Press on to victory Duessa, and savor all that will be.
BOOM! Right between the cry muscles!
Such a great story. Well done, DiveBomb. I had no real feelings towards these characters before - not disliking them, just apathy. You've made me care and in a really great way. Congratulations on completing such a wonderful tale.
Now..
*ahem*
sequel plz?
i3.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/newsfeed/000/317/165/18a.jpg
1036278 Wasn't sure if you wanted your name mentioned or not. Don't ask me why, I dunno.
Oh my celestia. Let's give this author a round of applause! He's answering our cries for more!
My body is ready...but my mind will probribly be blown
Good story, I enjoyed it from start to finish
...Oh, and one more thing...
I hope you're all going to be ready for a wild ride.
WHY DO YOU TEASE US?!
Great story but the ship felt rather forced. It felt purely friendshipping until the last two chapters and then suddenly became a full ship which sort of mucked up the ending for me. Disappointing because the story itself was bloody fantastic. I loved how you brought daring to life.
There are reasons I love stories with either Braeburn or Daring Do in them. This story is one of those reasons.
In all honesty, the simply was simply captivating. I was so compelled to follow this story by, not only the amazing characters, the fleshed out settings, or even the clever writing and pacing, but by a combination of all these things. I loved how you showed multiple aspects of each character, bringing to light many of the facets in the personality, how you took the little we already knew about Braeburn and Daring Do, then extrapolated, crafting a cast of believable, lovable characters. I love how you wove an entirely new world out of the settings, whether it was the bar at Dodge Junction, or Cunning Colt's cave, and made them more than just backdrops. I love how you brought me along for the ride, kept me hoping for more, then gave more more than I asked.
Most of this is fan-gushing, but I did sincerely love your story. While it did bother me the Braeburn and Daring's relationship suddenly became much more of a prominent issue towards the end, I guess it was kind of what I may or may not have been hoping for this entire time. Besides, with the main matter of finding Cunning Colt's treasure out of the way, it's understandable that they'd have more time to reflect. It definitely left the ending much more bittersweet than I had originally expected. In any case, now that it's there, I can only hope that something is made of it. Already loved this ride, now I can't wait for the next one!
So yeah, keep writing, enjoy yourself, and stop making me hang on the edge of my seat, I've already broken, like, three other chairs this way over the course of reading this story.
(But don't actually stop.)
1106291 "Oh hai guys! Check out my new ASStalent! It's ASSTASTIC!"
This was a great story! eh-yup.
This was a great story! eh-yup.
WHOW this story was excellent. I loved Braeburn's character especially (Your gonna make him take a life in the next one right? RIGHT?)
! Can't wait to start reading the seq. Here have some mustaches, we all know the west has plenty to spare 
Besides that, I thought the arms were an interesting addition, and I do love a good western, but it wasn't just the inclusion. The way you described Brae's rifle and made sure that all the mechanics (like the way the lever was large enough for a hoof, things like that). All in all, AWESOME
To be honest, I was afraid of the changes comparing to where it originated. But as I continued reading, I was really surprised on despite the new elements in it, it was done really well. Goes to show that if executed correctly, you can have a very well written story. One of my favorite fan fics.
Sounds interesting. I shall track this and read it when possible.
I want to say that I thoroughly enjoyed your story. It kept me engaged from the very beginning and continued to entertain me as it went along. It's short, but also a sweet ride. I'm usually not one for shipping, finding most fics that have them in there to make it a shallow experience that seems to make little sense in the long run, but you're building up too it. I wouldn't even call it shipping, it's something more. The relationship is coming over time, and it seems to be a great fit.
That leads to a personal issue, this is in no way against the story, it's a testament of how good it is for it to bring this kind of reaction from me.
(Spoilers)
Then again, how could I fault her for running to something she knows? Still seems like a vicious cycle of running and hiding. She is in an emotionally confused state, and it's sometimes best to go and sort that out yourself, but this is different. Braeburn is someone that would respect her, and stay with her as she tries to figure things out for herself. He would be next to her the whole time and only help her that way, while expecting nothing in return but simple companionship.
Daring should not have left. She's taken emotional solitude and decided what she needed was an even deeper exile.
You've captured the childlike joy of meeting a hero out of a fiction. A surreal experience that all hope for when they are drawn into a story with a character such as Daring. I also like the twist with RD that you did, being mutual heroes to each-other. The personality dynamic of Braeburn is also appreciated, moving from a timid stallion that thinks rather low of himself, to a determined hero that gains a new confidence in his abilities.
Again, I thank you for the great story, it was an honor to read it.
I hope to enjoy your sequel as you update it. I'll find the time to read along soon.
(Also, as a side note, I've had the pleasure to shoot a Winchester just like that. Person kept it in great condition, and I do have an affinity for lever action. Powerful rifle. Very glad you knew what you were talking about.)
1353826 Hey-O! What's this? Oooh, a breakdown of the story. I like these. And just a heads-up: you got me in the mood to discuss the topic of Daring. Below is simply my opinion on the matter, and yours I truly appreciate.
If there's one thing I'm glad about when it comes to this story, it's the controversy that I knew Daring's departure would instill. I'm glad people seem to flock to either side of the argument whether or not it was best for her to do so, it means that I have readers that analyze, and I like that. You want my reason for it? Well, her character is essentially an OC personality, considering the difference between her and the show's canon: one's real, one's not. And throughout the story I've built her with several characteristic parameters and attributes, i.e., what she does, how she reacts to certain situations. In my opinion, her needing some time alone makes more sense to her overall mindset when it comes to emotions. She's dealt with a fair amount of heartbreak and loss, but the biggest thing she has trouble with is trust, even when it comes to her own emotions. Daring has an analytical mind, one built for objectivity and decisiveness. Again, in my opinion, it makes more sense if she gave herself some time away from Braeburn to see if her mind is still thinking rationally, and not convoluted with feelings that might not remain.
But again, thank you for the kind words. It really helps the drive to keep writing.