• Member Since 8th Jan, 2012
  • offline last seen Mar 13th, 2013

TAW


Hi, I'm TAW. I write terrible erotic my little pony fan fiction about cartoon horses having sex with each other, or vaguely defined human audience-inserts, for fun. Because... uh. I have no shame?

Comments ( 70 )

Hah!

This was fun! It's been ages since I last read a fun AJ x Rarity fic. So thanks for that! It really sends me back to Swayback Mountain; I had forgotten how fun these two were.

The sentiment that AJ's hat is already perfect for her is very cute, IMO. I really enjoyed that part.


Idly thinking back to Sweet and Elite, I wonder what the Canterlot snoods would say if they realized they were talking to the bearers of the Elements. Ah well, I've rambled enough.

Thanks!

TAW

308964
No, thank you!
"Fun" is what I go for, the vast majority of the time. If it's not fun to read, then I don't really think it has any place calling itself FiM fan fiction - a lighthearted attitude is important, I think, even in something as absurd as making horses have sex.

AJ would get along great with the 10th Doctor Whooves.

*First impressions*

Angry sex?

ANGRY SEX

Cheers
~iraqlobstah

TAW

309406
Fair points, though personally I disagree that "ya'll're" is /too/ ugly and I'd probably still have used it anyway. I did notice near the end just how often I'd typed "ya'll", though, it was... yeah, that should have been edited.

With the narrative, that was... somewhat intentional? Applejack's feelings were purposefully pretty simple, though I should have stressed it harder if you didn't notice - my fault, sorry.

I think you're right in the major criticism that it just fell apart at the end, I'll try and do better.

309376 "Don't let me eat pears! I HATE pears!" :rainbowlaugh:

So far it's cute.

My reactions through story:
:ajbemused:
:twilightsheepish:
:ajsmug:
:rainbowhuh:
:raritystarry:
> no proper violent sex despite tons of suggestions at that: :flutterrage:
:rainbowlaugh:

Awesome story, however if you start suggesting some more violent sex, carry on writing it. Or else I go angry and all :pinkiecrazy:
The end was slightly weird and could've been of course better, however I liked the 'what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas' type mentality there. You have some talent though, that much is for certain :twilightsmile:

TAW

309745
yeah, sorry about that. I guess what I was going for was lampshading every other part of their interaction, where they're never more than a bad sentence away from being at each other's throats but they'd never actually follow through on it, and they're always still friends. But I'm too much of a hack to pull that off properly, so, sorry.

TAW

309941
Maybe I'm biased because I actually say things as horrific as ya'll'll in real life, then. And yeah, that last one is a legit error, I have no excuse.

TAW

310069
Oh, my approach to language drives many people mad. I try to take the moral high ground - language evolves, linguistics is the study of how it is and has been, not something to chart its future, but even given that I intentionally go far too far. There's no excuse for having "that shit's my jam" in your vocabulary in 2012. None at all.

"...Rarity threw together on the fly, fighting against that niggling part of her mind..."
Hehe. Niggling;
Annoying or harrying
A black child

I AM SO RACIST!

Also,
"...I can take it. Ya'll'll only be insulting your own dress." why are there two 'll things? It screwed up my mental pronunciation

Very good story overall, though, great storyline.

310419

As much as it pains me to admit this, I've heard this before and even attempted to use it before mentally kicking myself.

It is a contraction for "you all will" -- ya'll'll

I'm tracking this so that I may return to it later and read it. I will give you my verdict once I have read it.

TAW

310419
It's like "ya'll", with another "'ll". Just repeat the "'ll" sound again.

This is pretty good! Onwards to the final chapter! ~ALLONS-Y!~

TAW! Man, do I need to read all of your stuff!

So I guess I'll get started with this one! I'll comment for realsies once I've read it.

Why does that last line feel like a cliffhanger?! Augh. The ending doesn't hold up for me, not the way you wrote the characters. There just isn't anyway she(Rarity) could give up on it.
Anyways, I really liked the story.

This is a very cute story. I think the reason I love RariJack so much is the contrast between the two, and this portrayed it perfectly. Well done. :ajsmug::raritystarry::heart::coolphoto:

Aww :) I expect this is exactly how those two would work out together. Though I'm surprised Rarity didn't toss AJ into a bathtub... then join her :ajsmug:

:flutterrage:We are the Empress's pride. Hear us Roar!!!!!

This certainly is quiet an interesting and maybe downright entertaining Fic featuring Applejack and Rarity together that you certainly capture there overall actions on how they would have acted in the show itself which nevertheless made this all convincing you made them to be all the more fun to read.

:rainbowlaugh:Spike just appearing out of nowhere when the Purple Fashionista just scream her excited totally make me think of this Art here:
fc06.deviantart.net/fs71/i/2011/310/b/a/criminal_spike_by_csimadmax-d4fbc3f.png That surely made me laugh all the more afterwards and even hoping the she would have call out for help when she realize it wasn't normal for Spike to appear just then LOLLL!!!!!

:applejackconfused:The farm mare just had to mention something about PEAR'S just had to remind on this very hilarious comic down below:
fc06.deviantart.net/fs70/f/2011/249/5/f/ponykoma___apple_acres_by_emlan-d492fw6.png Only made my day all the more amusing that I most thank you for that.


+++++

i.neoseeker.com/mgv/60953-Shadow%20of%20Death/953/49/72960_god_empress_of_ponykind_artist_equestriaprevails_god_emperor_god_empress_lauren_faust_lauren_faust_is_best_pony_meta_oc_warhammer_40k_display.png

"Love the Empress

for She is the salvation of Pony-kind

Obey Her words

for She will lead you into the light of the future,

Heed her wisdom

for She will protect you from Evil

Whisper her prayers with devotion,

for they will save your Soul

Honour Her servants,

for they speak in Her voice

Tremble before Her majesty,

for we all walk in Her immortal shadow."[/b

Awesomesauce:ajsmug::raritywink:

TAW

310952
No, no, they'll give it a try. They were just arguing. What I was going for was, "What happens in Canterlot stays in Canterlot, but all that really happened was arguing - they fell in love elsewhere, and that stays". Probably screwed it up. Sorry.

311233
Me too, man. I was getting kinda sick of it by the end, but there's plenty of room for a longer morning after scene. Filled with delicious bubble bath sex and angry cleaning. "Is that dirt on your hoof? You TOUCHED me with this! Oh, Applejack, how could you?!"

flutterrage:Lament the Fallen, For the Empress Laments them All!!!!

:pinkiegasp:Got to say the whole conversation along with words pronunciation on Apple jack was well executed to fine point along with this chapter has definitely been an eye popping one for sure that certainly shows a side of Rarity we never expected for a mare of her stature in ways in thinking of her old friend in such a way we might view as unrefined but then again love has the tendency to trike where we least expected it to be.

:trixieshiftright:Why did our lovable element of Generosity have to mention the farm mares Ass has surely had me thinking of this little sample of a sticking point:
fc01.deviantart.net/fs71/i/2011/269/e/4/southern_rarity_and_applejack_by_tristikov-d4b0r44.jpg Still its all good LOLLLL!!!!


+++++

i.neoseeker.com/mgv/60953-Shadow%20of%20Death/953/49/72960_god_empress_of_ponykind_artist_equestriaprevails_god_emperor_god_empress_lauren_faust_lauren_faust_is_best_pony_meta_oc_warhammer_40k_display.png

"Love the Empress

for She is the salvation of Pony-kind

Obey Her words

for She will lead you into the light of the future,

Heed her wisdom

for She will protect you from Evil

Whisper her prayers with devotion,

for they will save your Soul

Honour Her servants,

for they speak in Her voice

Tremble before Her majesty,

for we all walk in Her immortal shadow."[/b

:flutterrage:Long shall be your suffering. Joyous be your Pain!!!!!!

++++Words to Heed+++++

"Let the Sins of the Flesh Be there Weakness, Let there Mind Wonder of Pure Desires! May the Ecstasy be there Calling, For they are Mortals who Crave the Sweetness of Deviation of which to Sate there Hunger. Born of Wanting and of Longing For the Touch that can be Sated Through Pain and Pleasure For which I Provide in its Rawest Form."

+++++Slaanesh Chaos God of Lust, Excess, Pleasure, Perfection and Hedonism-

:raritystarry:Got to say you definitely outdone yourself with the more intimate scene which where both imaginative and overall compelling between this lovely mares for sure along with how you describe it that brought a bit of eroticism, sexiness, hotness and overall Naughtiness which shows both Applejack and rarity can be many things than just what the Cartoon shows them to be.

:twilightsmile:The part where Rarity silencing anymore words from her willing companion would have been so awesome or rather endearingly more emotional if this Art had been add on to it:
fc07.deviantart.net/fs70/i/2012/035/0/d/rarity_x_applejack_wip_by_opera_romance-d4olezz.jpg But then again it would have nevertheless in ways of how you written it.


++++++

i.neoseeker.com/mgv/60953-Shadow%20of%20Death/953/49/72960_god_empress_of_ponykind_artist_equestriaprevails_god_emperor_god_empress_lauren_faust_lauren_faust_is_best_pony_meta_oc_warhammer_40k_display.png

"Love the Empress

for She is the salvation of Pony-kind

Obey Her words

for She will lead you into the light of the future,

Heed her wisdom

for She will protect you from Evil

Whisper her prayers with devotion,

for they will save your Soul

Honour Her servants,

for they speak in Her voice

Tremble before Her majesty,

for we all walk in Her immortal shadow."

MY PAINUS APPROVES!
:moustache:

All in all, this was a blast to read! I only wish that there could be another chapter...This was time well spent.

Since you love criticism so much, I'll be sure to post my thoughts on each chapter :derpytongue2:

I have only a little nitpick here though; "straitening" should be "straightening''. For the rest, this is well-written and sufficiently entertaining.

TAW

312255
I'm... going to blame my spellcheck on this, I just took its word on it. Thanks.

The use of the word "ass" seemed a little out of place to me, especially coming from Rarity.

Otherwise, again, very good.

309960 Texas? (lived there for 3 years)

RArity, why you so mean to poor Spike D:

TAW

312298
England - about as far away as you can get!

Doesn't really feel like an ending, to be honest. Maybe that's just me wanting to see more RarityxAJ, though.

I have one complaint.
That Rarity is being described as "weak". :rainbowlaugh:
Remember Tom? Rarity is many things, but weak she is not. :rainbowdetermined2:

Well in all honesty, this one turned out differently than those before it. :duck: Kinda miss your one shot formats but this one is a good start. Chapters 1 and 2 grant flow towards chapter 3, but when it reached chapter 3. Well it lacked something, but still gave it a thumbs up because of you being TAW. :trollestia:
:twistnerd:Other than that, some typos and some transition fragments within the chapters but as I said its solid and its good!:yay:

309323now go do everything:trollestia:...........i just had to:moustache:

img.ponibooru.org/_images/ff9ce23a9e6998db94b03f139a30b40c/70433%20-%20face%20humanization%20Not_bad%20obama%20pinkie_pie%20rage%20reaction_face%20reaction_to_op.png

Although... I kind of felt the change of pace in between chapter 2 and 3. I know that that's your concept, TAW, but this had so much (more) potential :rainbowkiss:

TAW, you wonderful bastard, you've done it again!
A clopfic that's not only brilliantly well wrtten, but also a sheer enjoyment to read!
Also, this, to me, seems to be SCREAMING out for a follow-up!
:yay:

Bravo, sir Well done.

TAW

313944
It's "Complete" in the sense that I feel fairly happy leaving the story there and don't think it needs anything more - certainly not in the sense that I'm done with the two. I like Rarijack, I'm sure I'll get back to them at some point.

I found the one major flaw!

This is but one pairing, using 2 out of 6....... Know what I mean? :twilightblush:

5+4+3+2+1 (well i think we got the 1 :raritywink:) so that leaves 14.

But that's the only real flaw I could find.

Eagerly awaiting more. :twilightsmile:

sad:moustache: is sad


>>tellytoy
Well said good sir, well said.

Apparently weird ships are my favorite. :pinkiehappy:
I love :ajsmug: + :raritywink:, :twilightblush: + :pinkiehappy: and :rainbowlaugh: + :fluttershyouch:.

Nice one. I approve. :twilightsmile:

I read the bit about pears and instantly thought of the Doctor.

Holy SHIT! I mean need I say more?!

This was a great story! Just... work on punctuation, okay? You missed a LOT of commas, mate. Always do better, okay? Thumbs up! :yay:

Edit: Alright, it was only like, one period that you truly missed. The rest were all commas.

Just one thing... YURI, excelent YURI

TAW

351207
I did? Where?

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