How Rainbow Dash Got Her Sunglasses

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Ever wonder how Rainbow Dash got her sunglasses? Well she sure didn't buy them at the store. That would be too easy.

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Snuggly

Snuggly #1 · Nov 20th, 2013 · · ·

iambrony.dget.cc/mlp/gif/125823%20-%20animated%20ask%20ask_pinkie_or_dash%20deal_with_it%20rainbow_dash%20tolerate_it.gif?1344078788

They clearly fell from the heavens.

TwiwnB

TwiwnB #2 · Nov 20th, 2013 · · ·

That was way more fun than expected, even if the story relies mostly on references to the episodes.
(just as a side note, because it doesn't really matters, RD had her sunglasses before Cheerilee had her adventure with Big Mac, but you already know that, you don't care and neither should I , so I didn't check the rest).

When the dust settled, everyone involved had been killed, shot, maimed, jailed, sued, burned, or downvoted into oblivion.

Your main figure of style in this story and I quite like it. A repetition of terms with an ending in ridicule to make it ironic.

If there were a sunglasses tag, I’d use it.

a long day of doing drive by shootings, robbing banks, and throwing her empty aluminum cans in the trash instead of recycling them.

It has been a long time since I haven't read such a short but extended description of a character. And it fits the stereotyp behind Gilda very well. (still using that figure of style).

“What, racism? No, of course not. I’m only racist towards dirt walkers,” she said, referring to any being that couldn’t fly.

I mostly staid at the first degree of lecture, but I felt like you were making a 360° critic of everything going through your mind. Seen that take on racism somewhere else already, but it's always a good reminder of the way we use the term today...

“Aw, come on, everypony knows that there’s a new alicorn like every year anyway,”

That one was fun too. Being both "Oh come one, so many alicorn nowadays..." and "Dude, relax, it doesn't really matters" at the same time.

which is like a sonic rainboom except it doesn’t contain any harmful ultraviolet radiation.

Perfect ending for such a story.

I won't pretend it was a perfect story, or a high form of litterature, but it gave me more than I expected, it delivers what it is supposed to deliver in my opinion and I had a lot of fun reading it, because I'm the type of guy who likes that kind of humor.
This day begins well , thanks.