• Member Since 11th Nov, 2011
  • offline last seen February 4th

Karrakaz


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Source

Inexperience is a foreign concept to Celestia. At least she thinks it is. Right up until the moment a rash decision leaves her with a student who is a dozen years younger than what she's used to.




Enjoy.

Chapters (16)
Comments ( 1162 )

Nice start, I like the expansion on what happened when Twilight got her Cutie Mark. Just out of curiosity will Spike appear in later chapters?

3423719

Probably. There's something about putting a fire breathing dragon with a bibliophile that tickles my funny bone. Especially when he still has to learn to control said firebreath... :twilightsheepish:

Has the potential for much adorableness. I shall keep an eye on it.

Raise your hand if you wanted to smack brighthoof

Fav and like. Wery nice story.

Why am I getting a huge case of deja-vu.

I'm pretty sure I've seen the exact scene where celestia was about to destroy the magical disturbance only to realize it was a filly.:rainbowderp:

Wonderful! Stoked that you'll be adding more chapters as well! I was really impressed by Unbound Train so seeing more Twi/Tia development is very exciting.

By the way, you have a rogue quotation mark here...

Celestia bit down on her lip to stifle a giggle at their near panicked expressions."She smiled at the trio, feeling a lot better about her day now, than she had several hours ago; wounds and headache notwithstanding.

3423857>>3424023>>3424258>>3424392

Glad you guys enjoyed the story. :twilightsmile:

3424470

Thanks, I'll fix it right away.

I really like this story! will be following it closely.

No book fort? I am disappoint.
---
Excellent start. :twilightsmile::yay:

Also,

today was going to be was going to be problematic

I hope you see the problem

3424807

And so you see, no matter how many times you go through something, you're still going to miss some obvious things. :twilightsheepish:

Thanks.

OMG you wrote unbound train? Loved that story too! I'm not one for following authors but I think I should check out more of your stories.

Nice opening. A little rough—caught a few errors here and there—but I liked it. I was a bit surprised with the direction you took this, actually; I'm so used to Celestia being the omniscient chess-master that I was caught off guard with her compassion here.

But anyway, this gets a fave from me. Good work.

very promising start! :twilightsmile:

Couple of minor typographical issues don't detract from a great story setup. I'll echo 3424900 and say it's nice to see flustered Celestia instead of the usual chessmaster.

Only complaint I had: based on the story description, I thought this was going to be Celestia de-aging the canon Twilight Sparkle back to a filly (minus 12 years) and dealing with the consequences. Pleasantly surprised that I was wrong, but still.

Also, don't entirely fault Brighthoof. He sees Twilight's power surge and thinks of her like the Marvel Universe thinks of Franklin Richards. Instead of steadily gaining power as she ages, she's born with all her powers turned on and needs to be carefully controlled lest she cause a catastrophe.

Wow, this was pretty great. I had thought it was a one-shot, but knowing it'll be part of a greater story makes me happy; I'd absolutely love to see more. The way you portray Celestia is brilliant.

As usual, you fail to disappoint. You are worthy of your avatar indeed :3

3425069

I think it would have made for a powerful scene had we seen Celestia consider Brighthoof's side for a moment... but then, this is a different Celestia. Not sure how I feel about that, but I agree that it's nice to see it played differently.

3425336

If we discard the 'troll/moll/triant' variants of Celestia, by which I mean actually talking about Celestia. I don't think there's any universe where she would really consider his proposal as the right way to go.

Okay, lose the 'enemies of Equestria in stone' bit. Only ONE enemy of Equestria was imprisoned in stone, and that was because he was so incredibly personally dangerous. And even then she decided to release him on parole in hopes of reforming him. (It's reasonable to assume that she didn't release him sooner because she could no longer use the Elements after banishing her sister.) It would be rather out of character for her to go about imprisoning ponies in stone all over the place, regardless of their crimes, if such a punishment was too cruel to make permanent even on DISCORD.

3425409

>tfw headcanon

It's his story dude.

3425429 And it's my opinion, and Faust's canon.

Nice solid start to an excellent looking fic.

Lets see where you go with it...

~Skeeter The Lurker

Adorable story, and room for quite a bit of interesting revelation.

3425462
It is fortunate then, that this story has never claimed to be 100% canon compliant. If Celestia wants to petrify dangerous enough people, then by all means she'll do it. It might help, if your criticism was less of an absolute demand and more of a thoughtful insight.

This shouldn’t be too difficult.
she has no idea, does she?

Oh yes, this is an intriguing start. I shall be following this :twilightsmile:

Skeeter pretty much said everything that needs to be said

I have to admit, while I dislike Brighthoof personally, I appreciate him as a character. He's not intentionally mean, just focuses too much on the big picture without caring about the details. Very much a shades of gray character. That's not to say I wouldn't give him a piece of my mind for wanting to take a child's life away from her because of something she can't control without even considering alternatives.

Although talking about imprisoning a little filly right in front of her parents is one of the most suicidal statements I've seen from an MLP character, cannon or fanon :rainbowlaugh:

Very cute so far, however it was one long read... still, first chapters should be long. MOAR! :flutterrage: Fluff indeed...

Ahh, there we go. The feature box had a distinct lack of its usual "twilestia fic" inhabitance.

3425462 Unless the author misappropriated Faust's divine guidance to help him pen his blasphemous little story I'm not sure why that matters. Nor do I see where your opinion comes into the scheme of things.

3426023 what makes it even MORE suicidal is that he did it front of the SPARKLE parents:twilightoops::pinkiesick:, that's where it gets REAL :pinkiecrazy:

and more than a little freaking ponies out with relatively harmless pranks.

by Twi, Tia, or both? :derpytongue2:

3426285
I don't want to get involved in this argument, but I thought I'd point out that Lauren Faust actually left the show during production of Season 2, so anything beyond the first 2 seasons doesn't have anything to do with her

3426630 I thought my sarcasm was rather obvious.

3426639
Ah, my bad. Sarcasm tends to go over my head a lot of times, especially when it's in writing :twilightblush:

Inexperience is a foreign concept to Celestia. At least she thinks it is. Right up until the moment a rash decision leaves her with a student who is a dozen years younger than what she's used to.

> She's used to adult-Twilight.
> Rash decision.
> Spell-casting!

The below is what I thought this story was going to be about.

>

Twilight is accidentally and irrevocably turned into a filly by a spell that Celestia rashly decided to cast, and she's suffering possibly permanent amnesia, or she may just not realize something is wrong. Celestia has to raise Twilight, again.

3426023 Brighthoof can be classified squarely under the category of 'sanctimonious asshole'.

:trollestia:

3425409 You are quite correct.

The Elements imprisoned Discord in stone, not Celestia and Luna.

The Princesses' own powers were useless against him, everyone seems to forget.

At this time in the story, the Elements are inert in the ruined castle in the Everfree, thus Celestia has no access to their powers. And I don't think they'd do anything to an innocent filly regardless, other than perhaps seal whatever powers she couldn't control.

And when the Bearers then wielded the Elements... Discord ended up 'stoned' again. Celestia and Luna had nothing to do with it that time.

The only canon mechanism we know of for petrifaction other than the Elements is the gaze of a cockatrice. Now, if Celestia's 'Inquisitors' or whatnot wish to employ such a method, they could use a captive cockatrice.

When the tower of the scholar was built, Celestia had given the workers specific instructions for it’s construction.

Proper noun.

This is turning out to be one of my favorite stories on the site.
Also congratulations on the feature, you've easily earned it tenfold

3427212 I have to agree with you there. That's what I thought I was about to read as well.
But this is still cool

3425355Ok im not going to lie this story took me straight back a few years ago when this fan fiction was in its infancy, Your doing a wonderful job delegating this story and its flow. Just to say you caught a carbon copy of the teacher/adoptive mother figure many felt filled her character and in part gave incite into Twilight kudos

3426843 No worries. I probably came across as more of a bastard than I intended, blah. Still, there's not a single frame of animation which suggests that Celestia is not single-handedly capable of meting out petrification to things which aren't superpowered abominations that arguably outclass her. If the writer wants to go with it then why not?

I find I'm much in agreement with Celestia as far as everypony's casual discussion of such horrible punishments. Seriously, she does it three times in over three thousand years (Sombra, Discord, Nightmare Moon) and everyone thinks she does it every day? wtf?

However, I like the inside look we're getting into Celestia's mind, and filly Twilight is just too cute.

3424392

The Monster in Twilight mayhaps my good chum?

3427659

School grammar has no place in creative writing beyond the instances one is graded on such things. A lot of the "rules" are bent when creating, Tower of the Scholar reads perfectly fine in context, The Scholar's Tower is just as fine but the former reads more mythical while the latter is prosaic. There are bigger grammar fish to fry out there in the big wide world of Ficdom.

Anywho, I love this fic already and eagerly await more, though what age are you tagging Twilight at? I well know the trials of an eager to learn, enthusiastic and intelligent small child. Especially those eager to learn (I acquired an apprentice geologist in the form of my Uncle's niece one day at the beach and spent a long afternoon digging out my primary school library of factual books and other materials when baby sitting my friend's geography and history loving eight year old) they can certainly be overwhelming and you are portraying her well. More please! :twilightsmile:

3425429>>3426285>>3425785

Don't bother with that one. Got a reputation in the fandom for being an asshole and thinking he can tell others how they need to do their stories. Best just to ignore.

I extend that advice to the author, as well. More reasonable persons will be along to give their thoughts, criticisms, and opinions that won't sound like they're telling you that you're an ignorant pile of pus and need to change it to be considered a human being in their estimation. Better to listen to those people than him.

Let the dawws run rampant!!:twilightsmile:

Her legs were still trembling, and her coat was rapidly becoming more pink than white from the many gashes that marred her appearance.

Lolz.

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