Stetson Hat
Black Eye
by Arwhale
Applejack wiped a bead of sweat off her forehead as she trotted over the path, kicking up little puffs of dust with her hooves.
As she made it further down the hill, the keeled red tiles of the schoolhouse roof came into view. From a distance, Applejack could hear the metallic rattle of the school bell resonating in the late spring air, and little fillies and colts spilled out of the door en-masse. Being so high up, they seemed to her like tiny pastel-colored specks.
"Shoot. Ah’m runnin' late," she said to herself. Picking up some speed, she moved downhill at a more brisk pace. Still, it occurred to her that even if she were late, Apple Bloom probably wouldn't mind if she had some extra time to talk to her friends.
By the time she made it down, the schoolyard was bustling with fillies and colts waiting for their parents or older siblings to pick them up. Scanning through the crowd, Applejack searched for Apple Bloom and her two friends, Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo, knowing she was likely to find them all together in one group. With her keen eyes, it did not take long before she spotted Rarity’s little sister next to the schoolhouse. Expecting to find the other two girls with her, Applejack weaved in and out of the crowd, making her way over to Sweetie Belle.
However, as she got closer the farm mare noticed something odd: Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo were together, but there was no sign of Apple Bloom anywhere. Neither filly was speaking to one another. Their faces were downcast.
That was when Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo noticed Applejack out in the crowd. Their grimaces upon seeing her told the apple farmer that something was very wrong.
Scootaloo gestured toward the building with a cock of her head and looked back down to the ground, avoiding eye contact with Applejack. Just then Applejack noticed Miss Cheerilee emerging from the schoolhouse. Her face was serious, far from her usual cheery self, when she made her way over to Applejack.
“Hello there, Applejack,” she greeted. She wore a smile, but her eyes remained stoic. Cutting right to the chase, she said, “I’m afraid I have some bad news concerning Apple Bloom… Follow me, please.”
Applejack wanted to ask questions, but she didn’t say a word as she followed Cheerilee into the schoolhouse. However, all of her questions were answered when she saw Apple Bloom sitting in one of the desks with a blue and black ring around one of her eyes. Sitting in the seat two desks away from her was none other than Diamond Tiara, who was sporting a black eye of her own, a fat lip, and a scowl as Applejack walked in. Apple Bloom smiled sheepishly at her big sister, but turned her face away in shame as Applejack gave her a glare that could have scared the worm out of an apple.
Cheerilee went behind her desk, sitting down and folding her hooves together.
“Well, as you can see, Apple Bloom got into a bit of a fight today with Diamond Tiara.” She frowned, looking first at Applejack and then over at her two unruly students. They had not once looked at one another since Applejack had entered the room. “I assume you’ll give Apple Bloom a talking to when you get home?”
Applejack nodded, uttering only one word. “Eeyup.”
Apple Bloom sank low into her chair, as if she were trying to make herself invisible. Cheerilee sighed.
“Thank you, Applejack. I trust you and your family to do the right thing, though I am very sorry to say that Apple Bloom will have to be suspended for the rest of the week. Rest assured; the same will happen for Diamond Tiara.”
Applejack noticed Apple Bloom wince out of the corner of her eye. She nodded her head once to indicate that she understood Cheerilee's verdict.
“Ah understand, Miss Cheerilee. Thank you for your time.” She tipped her hat to the schoolteacher and called to her little sister, who was now burying her bruised face in her hooves. “Come on, AB; we’d best be gettin’ home.”
Apple Bloom got up with reluctance, her head hanging low. She glanced over at Diamond Tiara one last time, making eye contact with her mortal enemy long enough to exchange one final scowl before following her sister out into the hot spring day.
Apple Bloom followed Applejack at a distance, dragging her hooves through the dust of the schoolyard. Her black eye attracted the gaze of every filly and colt around her. Applejack noticed her sister exchange glances with her friends, Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo, from across the yard. Her fellow Cutie Mark Crusaders tried to comfort her from afar with melancholy smiles. Apple Bloom didn't smile back.
No sooner had they left the schoolyard that Applejack could see Diamond Tiara’s father, Filthy Rich, coming to pick up his daughter. Mr. Rich looked over to Apple Bloom, who was still following Applejack a couple of meters behind, and the two of them made brief eye contact. Seeing her black eye, he stepped in front of Applejack, partially blocking her path.
“Where is my daughter?” he demanded. The tone of his voice was like that of an interrogator. Applejack met his confrontation with a cool stare and stopped in her tracks, pointing to the schoolhouse with her hoof.
“She’s inside. Miss Cheerilee’ll want to have a word with you when you get there.”
Upon hearing the news, Mr. Rich’s face blanched. A small lump traveled down his throat.
“A-Alright. Thank you,” he replied. Applejack tipped her hat to him, not saying anything more as they parted ways.
She was a good distance up the big hill before she sensed that something wasn’t right. Looking over her shoulder, she saw that Apple Bloom was still standing near the bottom of the hill, watching Miss Cheerilee lead Mr. Rich into the schoolhouse behind her.
“Scoot your boot, Apple Bloom,” Applejack called back. Apple Bloom didn't seem to realize how far behind she was, but at her command she scurried up the hill until she was only a short distance behind, maintaining her distance the whole way back.
They walked in silence. Applejack never looked back, and Apple Bloom never looked up. The only sound made was the soft crunch of dust beneath their hooves until the farm came into view.
That was when Applejack stopped suddenly, sitting down on her haunches in the middle of the path. Apple Bloom stopped as well, keeping her distance. She eyed her big sister warily.
“Apple Bloom, come over here,” said Applejack with a stern but even tone, still facing the other direction. Apple Bloom gulped. She dragged her hooves, walking until she and Applejack were side by side.
“Look at me.” Applejack turned to face her.
Despite her apparent fear, Apple Bloom complied. She looked up, meeting Applejack's stern gaze.
“Now, Apple Bloom, this is what Ah want you to do.” Her eyes never wandered, fixing her younger sister with a gaze of stone. “Ah want you to tell me exactly what happened today at school between you and Diamond Tiara. Ah want you to tell me everything, and to tell me the truth. Understood?”
Apple Bloom nodded, her eyes watering. She did what she was told and began to relay the day’s events with a quavering voice, fighting back sobs as she did.
“Okay, okay. Ah will.” She wiped her eyes, pulling herself together. “It was at recess… Everything started when S-Sweetie Belle went to school today wearin’ one of her sister’s new hats. She was showin' it off to everypony on the playground, but Diamond Tiara got jealous and started pickin’ on her. She kept tellin' Sweetie that the hat looked ugly. Sweetie was tryin' to ignore her, but then Diamond knocked the hat off Sweetie’s head and got it all dirty. Sweetie Belle started cryin’, and Ah saw the whole thing, and Ah told Diamond Tiara that she was a big jerk and a bully and then…”
She paused, hesitating just before the climax of the story.
“Then… what?” Applejack questioned.
Apple Bloom swallowed hard. “…and then Ah pushed Diamond Tiara, an’ she came back an’ popped me one in the eye, and Ah popped her one, and then... and then Miss Cheerilee saw us and broke it up,” she concluded.
And that was it. The story was over. Applejack drank in all of the information Apple Bloom had relayed to her, deep in thought. She wanted to believe everything she’d heard. But for some reason, something didn’t feel right. There was a piece to this puzzle that didn’t quite fit…
“So, she hit you first, Apple Bloom?” she asked, her tone betraying her doubts. Apple Bloom nodded in affirmation.
“An’ there’s nothin’ else you want to tell me?”
Apple Bloom shook her head, looking away. Applejack, however, was not convinced.
“AB, look at me. Square in the eye. Right now.”
Apple Bloom clenched her glistening eyes shut for a moment, and then did what her sister said. Applejack’s eyes burned into hers.
“I want you to tell me, eye to eye, that you have told me everything and that you have told me the truth. Say it, right now. Ah…” she started Apple Bloom off.
“Ah…” Apple Bloom began, “Ah have told you… Ah told you… Ah’ve…”
She broke. Looking away with shame, she blurted out, “Ah haven’t told you everything.”
As the Element of Honesty, Applejack often did not have trouble telling the truth from a lie. But this one time, just this once, she wished her suspicions had been wrong.
“What haven’t you told me, Apple Bloom?” she asked. Her voice was soft, almost a whisper.
Tears were beginning to flow freely down Apple Bloom's cheeks. She told the rest of the story between sobs.
“After - hic! - Diamond Tiara made Sweetie Belle - hic! - cry, Ah told Diamond Tiara she was a big jerk and a - hic! - bully and then...” She took another deep breath to stop herself from sobbing. “...And then Ah dared her to fight me, an’ when she started walkin' away, Ah called her a big chicken, and then Ah pushed her, and then…”
She broke down completely. Her tears watered the dry soil below her.
Applejack was no longer glaring at Apple Bloom. She was taking it all in; her sister had egged on the fight. Even though Diamond Tiara had hit her first, Apple Bloom had still technically started everything.
Applejack wrapped a hoof around Apple Bloom and pulled the girl close to her chest, hugging her tight. Salty tears flowed down Apple Bloom's face as she returned the hug, wrapping her forelegs around Applejack’s middle.
For several minutes, they stayed like this. Applejack waited a minute until her sister’s crying had died down before she said anything.
“Ah want to tell you a couple things, Apple Bloom," she began. Her mouth was close to Apple Bloom’s ear. "First, Ah think it’s great that you stood up for your friend and told that brat Diamond Tiara to take a hike. Believe me, Ah can’t stand her just as much as you can’t.”
Tears staining her face, Apple Bloom peeked up at Applejack with her black eye. “Really?”
Applejack grinned. “Eeyup.”
Apple Bloom giggled. Unfortunately, the light moment couldn’t last forever. Applejack continued, becoming serious again.
“But even if she is the most horrible filly in all of Equestria, the second y'all go pickin’ fights with others, you’re in the wrong. Now, Ah've always told you that Ah ain't against self-defense. But Apple Bloom... the fact is, she may have hit ya first, but you still started the fight.”
Apple Bloom listened intently, nodding her head with understanding. She rested the side of her face on Applejack’s chest. “Ah know. Ah’m sorry... Ah shouldnt’ve done it, but Ah just got so… so angry…” She sniffled.
Applejack let go of Apple Bloom and scooted back a little bit, placing a hoof on her shoulder. The filly sat back on her haunches with her head low, but her eyes stayed fixed on Applejack.
“An’ it’s alright to be angry, Sugarcube,” she said the endearing term for the first time that day, causing a smile to form on Apple Bloom’s face for a brief second before disappearing again, “but it’s what you do with your anger that matters most. If y'all hadn't let your anger get the best of yah today, then none of this would've happened, an’ this whole thing could’ve been avoided. Do you understand what Ah'm sayin’, Apple Bloom?”
She nodded, wiping her eyes. “Yeah, Applejack, I understand.”
Applejack pulled her in for a quick hug. “Good. I’m glad ta hear it.” She released Apple Bloom but still kept a hoof on her shoulder. “An’ Ah appreciate you comin’ out an’ bein’ honest with me, sis. Ah know it was hard, but believe me, it’ll make you a better mare later on in life.”
Apple Bloom nodded in silence. Applejack could tell she was taking the words to heart as she ran her hoof through the girl's red mane. Her eyes would have beamed with pride had they not been so dimmed with sadness...
Nerves on edge, Applejack took in a deep breath, steeling herself. Apple Bloom looked up at her, face registering momentary confusion.
“Now, Apple Bloom... Ah know ya know what you did wrong, an’ Ah believe you’re sorry. But sis... there are still consequences for things that we do.”
Upon hearing these words, Apple Bloom hung her head lower than ever before, her ears falling back on her head. Even the red bow on her head drooped. Applejack felt a stabbing pain in her chest at the sight.
“Apple Bloom…” her voice warbled slightly, “Ah'm gonna need you ta get a switch.”
Apple Bloom choked on another sob. Her eyes watered afresh, but she nodded in understanding. “Okay…”
"Okay. Ah'll be waiting at the barn, sis," she said. With a nuzzle to her cheek, she sent Apple Bloom off, and the girl headed obediently to the orchard.
Nearly a minute went by before Applejack finally moved from her spot on the ground. The place between her shoulder blades broke out into a clammy sweat as she watched Apple Bloom become smaller and smaller, eventually disappearing from view entirely. A drop of the sweat trickled down her back, and the tingling sensation sent a shiver up her spine.
She could taste the bitter bark on her tongue, could almost feel the applewood branch clenched in her teeth and stretching out the corners of her mouth as she walked the path to the barn. Forcing one hoof in front of the other, her steps showed the same hesitation as they did when she had walked this same path so many years ago.
The barn doors loomed in front of her. She gazed up at them before pressing on the red-painted boards with her hoof, opening the doors with a gentle push. She poked her head in.
From inside, a caramel-colored stallion sat motionless on the barn floor. The edges of the stetson hat he wore atop his head were faded and frayed from use. She came to an abrupt halt in the doorway, his pained eyes meeting hers, but only for a moment. Her eyelids fell shut.
When she opened them, he was gone.
Swallowing, her eyes traveled to the place where he had been seated. She walked over and sat down on that same spot, turning around so that she was facing the barn door. A sequence of deep breaths slowed her pounding heart.
A trembling hoof traveled up to the stetson hat on her head. She brushed it over the rim, feeling the frayed fibers along the edges. She gently pulled down on the rim to situate the hat more firmly on her head before bringing her still-shaking hoof back down to the dirt. Again, she closed her eyes.
She waited.
Several minutes later, the barn door creaked open. Applejack waited, staring at the sliver of open space between the doors.
Apple Bloom walked slowly in, carrying a thin branch in her mouth. She had stripped it of all the twigs and leaves, leaving behind only a solid, flexible rod. Seeing Applejack waiting inside, she hesitated at the door, the front half of her body inside the barn and the other half out.
“Come in, Apple Bloom,” said Applejack, “and close the door behind you.”
Apple Bloom did what she was told and stood over at the other end of the barn. Her legs were bent slightly at the knees, and they shook visibly. Applejack's heart rose into her throat, and perspiration dripped down the back of her neck. There was no going back now.
“C-come on, sis. Bring it here.” She motioned to Apple Bloom with her hoof to bring her the switch. The quivering yellow filly obeyed and came over to her, dropping the implement at her hooves. She looked up at her with puppy dog eyes, but Applejack did not allow herself to be swayed. Hanging her head, Apple Bloom at last resigned to her fate.
Applejack picked up the switch in her mouth. With a gentle motion, she pulled Apple Bloom close with one hoof, sliding her over the dirt floor of the barn until her middle was pressed against her chest, making it so that Apple Bloom’s head was facing the far wall with her flank in the range of the switch. Applejack adjusted the implement in her mouth until it was long enough before she rested it on her sister's rear.
“Awre... awre you wready?” she asked, her speech impaired by the branch in her mouth. Apple Bloom nodded once, hiding her face between her front hooves on the dirt. She shut her eyes tight.
“Y-yeah... Ah’m ready.” Every muscle in Apple Bloom's body tensed up as she braced herself for the first strike. Her sister raised the switch.
Applejack closed her eyes. She took a deep breath, bit down hard, and whipped the branch down.
“Ah!”
Apple Bloom yelped as the switch thwacked down on her rear, leaving a long red stripe behind. Applejack didn’t hold back and whipped her rump again, causing her to cry out in pain and tears to trickle out from the corners of her eyes. Mentally blocking out the cries and sobs of the filly at her hooves, Applejack kept a slow and steady rhythm with her strokes.
“Ow! Ah! Ooow!” cried Apple Bloom as the switch made its mark over and over again. She tensed up against Applejack, hind legs shaking from her efforts to stay still. Nonetheless, it did not take many more swats before Applejack could feel Bloom beginning to squirm in her grasp, unable to control herself. She didn’t hold it against her little sister; she knew firsthand how much this hurt. Gripping her more firmly, she trained the switch to keep whipping down in a rhythmic, steady arc.
“Ahahaaaa! Ahhh!” More heart-rending cries tore themselves out of Apple Bloom’s throat. She crossed her forelegs in front of her and pressed her face into the space between them, rubbing her right leg up and down with her left in a futile effort to fend off the awful sting, but her cries only amplified until they morphed into a single, continuous wail.
Applejack swung one last time, making it just a bit harder than the rest, and spat the implement out onto the ground.
Apple Bloom's whole body quaked uncontrollably. Dirt stuck to her cheeks from where her face had pressed up against the barn floor. She didn't even seem to know that the punishment had stopped.
But before she could even lift up her head, a strong pair of forelegs wrapped themselves around Apple Bloom’s underside. Applejack lifted her up from the ground, pulling her quaking body into hers in a loving embrace. She clasped her hooves around her younger sibling, letting her cry on her shoulder. Apple Bloom may not have known it, but she was not the only one with tears flowing down her cheeks.
“Shhh, shh, it’s alright, Sugarcube. Just let it all out.” Applejack rubbed Apple Bloom’s back up and down, her orange coat wet with Apple Bloom’s tears and a few of her own.
“Ah'm s-sorry! Ah-Ah’m so sorry, Applejack,” she stammered between gasps of air. “Ah'm sorry…”
Applejack squeezed even tighter. “Shh, it’s okay, sis. Ah already forgave you. It’s all done.”
The two sisters stayed there for what seemed like an eternity. Applejack whispered soothing words into Apple Bloom's ear, continuing to caress her back and mane until her cries eventually died down. She fell limp in her big sister's grasp.
Applejack looked over at Apple Bloom. Her black eye was even puffier than before from her crying, and discolored lines ran from her eyes and down her cheeks from where the tears had trickled down her face. The girl's gentle breaths felt hot on her shoulder.
“Ah love you, Apple Bloom.” She nuzzled her tenderly. Almost imperceptibly, Apple Bloom returned the gesture, the faintest smile present on her lips. "Ah’m... Ah’m so proud of you."
The barn became silent and still. Over a half hour passed before Applejack finally set Apple Bloom down, careful not to touch her flank in the process. The filly sat down on the dirt for a second but, with a sharp breath, shot back up onto her hooves from the sting. Applejack smiled sadly.
“Yeah, it’s gonna be sore for a little while yet. Ah’ll get you a cushion for your chair when we eat dinner. Sound good?” she asked, trying to cheer the poor filly up. Apple Bloom wiped her nose, sniffling.
“Yeah, I guess... it sure does smart, though.” She looked back at her reddened rump with a wince. Applejack gave a sage nod of her head.
“Eeyup.” She pushed the barn door open. “Ah'm gonna go start fixin’ us up some dinner, and you can go get yourself cleaned up when we get back to the house. Are ya hungry?”
Apple Bloom's ears perked up at the mention of food.
“Mmhmm. Ah'm... starved, actually." She looked down, drawing a line on the ground with her hoof.
"Aaand..." Applejack leaned in closer, speaking softly into Apple Bloom's ear, "Ah think Ah just might fix us up some apple fritters for dessert. Sound like a plan?"
Apple Bloom's eyes lit up with excitement, and she gave a toothy grin. Applejack knew those were her favorite. "Y-yeah... that'd be real nice. Th-thanks..." She blushed.
Applejack patted her head. "You're welcome sis. Now come on, AB; we'd best be getting home."
She left the barn and stepped into the sunshine. Apple Bloom followed her out, no longer lagging behind, but right at her big sister's side.
...
The sweet, buttery aroma of glazed sugar and cinnamon-spiced apples still lingered in the air from dinner. Night had fallen hours ago, and everyone in the Apple household had long since gone to bed.
All except Applejack. She sat in the armchair beside the empty fireplace, wide awake with her Stetson hat lying in her lap.
Frayed fibers tickled her hoof as she traced it along the hat’s edges. The brim had gone floppy over the years, and the crown had flattened out from decades of use in rain or shine, sun or snow. Foggy patches of faded yellow marred the soft brown felt.
But it was hers. Hers to wear, and hers to bear.
“Ah hope Ah've done right, Pa,” she whispered. Her cheeks were smooth with dried tears. “Ah… Ah hope Ah've done right.”
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That was better than I expected it to be!! (No offence)
Very nice, I like the, ahem, 'old school' feel of the piece and the trepidation of AB when she's bringing the 'instrument' back after AJ sends her t' get it. Reminds me of older works or those that deal with that period when such practices were not frowned upon. I think you captured the spirit nicely.
Have a
(set of apples)
Pffft... Nothin wrong here!
Aww... such feelz!!!!!!!
. She likes sad stories.
This is my younger cousins second fanfiction she has ever read. She says that this one is the best.
Good story, poor Apple Bloom
, her heart was in the right, but not her head. I'm sure she's learned a valuable lesson.
Any plans on a sequel or side-story, from Diamond Tiara and Filthy Rich's perspective and what happen with them?
Feel bad for Sweetie Belle to, Diamond Tiara picking on her hat like that.
If I was applejack I would have punished her so bad that I would be arrested for child cruelty
I have message for L_Wolf and SuperLaserKitty
SERIOUSLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
While I want to say a good story, I just can't bring myself thumbs up. I'll tuck it away some where safe though. At the same time though, I feel if a parent were that sad to do it, they wouldn't. Just my opinion.
2921306 Well, Applejack isn't Applebloom's parent, is she?
Sorry but when children step out of line they need to be hit. I am not saying beat them horribly and what not, but a little bit of pain like a spanking. I say this knowing full well how much it hurts to do so (Being spanked as a child), but pain is a strong reminder to not do it again. People can call it cruelty and what not, but getting hit in the softest area of your body is not so bad. Using an implement however is wrong, and if the child already got a black eye I'd not condone spankings.
Knowing the alternatives of time out and being sent to your room are laughable punishments also kinda bolsters this feeling. Also there are some kids who need some kind of punishment like this because their parents are scared of their child.
Ethics of spankings aside it was overall a good story. I also don't think it is sad if they hug afterwords, I mean I never got that with a spanking but whatever.
2921306
Have you never heard the phrase "This hurts me just as much as it hurts you"?
People don't enjoy hurting the ones they love, even if it's part of a justly deserved punishment. Really, Applejack's in a position as difficult as that of Apple Bloom here, and they both handle themselves commendably.
2920862
...
Don't have kids.
2921306
Well, I appreciate you sharing your opinion in a dignified manner, even if I disagree. As Wireless already pointed out, no parent (or in this case, older sibling) should enjoy punishing someone they love. Of course Applejack did not want to switch Applebloom, but she nonetheless felt it was the right thing to do considering the circumstances.
I woulda liked to see a bit more of the fight between AB and DT
That was ok i guess
2920862
errm... k
*moves away*
This is good! I like how you showed that spanking can be done right, and isn't at all like beating a child.
What I have learned about cultural differences ...
Beeing from austria where domestic corporal punishment has been forbidden by law since 1975 I feel a awkward reading such a story ... for me corporal punishment of children is an out of date hillbilly method. I was really shocked when I learned from wikipedia that domestic corporal punishment is allowed in all US states and there even exists school corporal punishment in many states. Shocking
Just something to think about:
http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/7832020
2935534 u know that hole u can make with ur index and ur thumb well that hole is how big imagin how much it must hurt
3003766
Uhh... what?
3003917 yea bend your index finger into your thumb and the joint is how thick the stick can be
3004758
I was not aware there was a concrete form of measurement for this sort of thing, but... okay.
And ponies don't have fingers. Just saying.
2935534
Yeah, I can definitely see why that would be shocking. I'd probably feel the same way if I grew up in Austria.
The thing about the study you presented is that it deals specifically with the effects of corporal punishment on adolescents. It does not make those same correlations between the spanking of children and “an increased risk later in life of depressive symptoms, suicidal thoughts, alcohol abuse, physical abuse of children, and wife beating.” So, when relating the study to this story, it doesn’t really apply since Apple Bloom is definitely not an adolescent.
And quite frankly, I’m not surprised that they were able to make those correlations between spanking teens and those teens having problems later in life. I've never been an advocate of extending corporal punishment into the teen years (the saying, "you are never too old for a spanking" is a load of bullshit). Chances are if you still feel the need to spank a teenager, you’ve been doing the whole thing wrong to begin with. I tried to make Applejack an example of how to do it right; with love (not anger), with the focus being on what the child did wrong and why it was wrong (and not on “mommy spanked me because I made her mad”), without overdoing it, and only for severe misbehavior. Do all parents who spank their kids make sure this happens? Of course not, and it’s a damn shame. But when done right, it can have a positive effect on a kid’s development. That might sound crazy to you, and understandably so, but it’s the truth.
And thank you for taking time to voice your concerns in a dignified manner. I really do appreciate it, even if I have my disagreements.
3006147 true very true but it hurts like hell ive been hit by a stick just to be hit and no it waasnt by my parents it was by my douche friends it hurts like hell
24.media.tumblr.com/a257ad5165644b1f79354634dfdee284/tumblr_mqo61uYbwk1rj6vd5o1_400.png
Now this was a good fic. Have a like and fav as well. Feel free to post this in the long description of the fic.
this left me feeling disgusted. my second favorite pony doing this? it felt so wrong.
im so conflicted with this story.
3007676
Thank you so much! You just made a pretty crappy day a whole lot better!
What's this? You were holdin' out on me, Arwhale! I would have loved to read this when we were talkin'.
I'm reading through it right now, but there are a few things that caught my eye. Firstly, I felt the events at the schoolhouse was a little rushed. You did not fail to paint the scene with your descriptions, but I think a longer build up to Apple Bloom being silently walked home would have been more powerful. I enjoyed the scene with Filthy Rich, however. Adding that he was dreading finding his daughter was a very nice touch, it makes me wonder if he's worried about her well being or if he's more worried about her behaviour. It's a nice touch.
This made me cringe, I'm not gonna lie. I really don't think it's fair to your story to fall back on this trope, especially since Applejack has been told white lies in the show without catching them. Also, the Elements themselves do not -define- a character's abilities, I've always seen them as just benefiting and drawing power from what was already present. Forgive me if that's not what you were going for, but that's my two cents.
Thankfully, AJ's little egocentric thought up there was immediately erased by how she reacted in the wake of Apple Bloom's full confession. Very believable Applejack, comforting her sister when appropriate and explaining that not everypony can control themselves, but still making sure Bloom knew she was in the wrong. Best way to let Bloom mediate on that? Having her fetch the switch. Well done.
I personally would have had Bloom switched a lot longer, but my experiences with that particular type of spanking is non-existent at best. She accepted her punishment without hesitation and had experienced it before, so I just thought that she could definitely take a lot more than what AJ dished out. It felt a little disconnected to have them cuddle for a half an hour for such a short spanking, but there is absolutely nothing wrong with giving the guilty party a good long hug session afterwards.
Sorry if it seems like I'm raining down hard on this fic, but I ain't. I really, really enjoyed it. I always enjoy parenting done right.
You've earned a watch, fave, and vote.
3014980
Heh, sorry about that. Probably should've let you know a while ago.
Anywho, thanks a lot for your honest feedback! I already made a small fix on the "she could always tell the truth from a lie" bit, and I'll consider revising the parts you've suggested. I've got enough on my plate for now, so I'll just have to see what the future holds.
It's funny, because the first version I ever wrote of this story actually detailed the entire fight between Apple Bloom and Diamond Tiara, and the buildup was far longer as a result. In addition, the first version I ever wrote didn't even have any corporal punishment in it at all. But, for whatever reason, throughout my experimentation with how I wanted to write it, it ended up being what you see right now.
Glad to know you enjoyed it! And thanks for the vote and the favorite and the follow and all that!
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this story was annoying to me having gotten into fight like this myself, i can say the first punch is the only thing that really matters, Diamond was actually completely at fault, she was the one that not only started the fight by attacking sweetie belle but hitting applebloom
it doesn't matter if A-B dared her, D-T should have had control of herself in the first place if anything i find it a flaw of character that applejack would punish applebloom at all for a simple fight, not only is she not her mom, but Applejack herself is one which is quick to the fight and is in of herself a very aggressive pony, if anything i'd imagine they'd grow closer
now if applebloom set fire to the school or something, then yeah i could see that, but this was just
you get a like for making me annoyed, not an easy thing to do
2920862 Huh
.
... I'm just gonna go make a call. Be right back.
Should be "you're".
Not trying to nag. I just thought I should point it out.
I really enjoyed this story.
3217961
Oh. My. God.
Thank you so much for pointing that out. That's usually one of my peeves when people misuse that word...
brb gonna go hit myself in the face with a brick~
3219940 Don't you just bucking hate it?
.
Though I don't think it's worth assaulting yourself with a-
*You hit self with brick*
Well, whatever makes you happy
Hey, Apple Bloom, it could've been worse. Instead of Applejack with the rod, it could've been Darth Sidious with his Force lightning.
This story is so well-written that I desperately want to give it a thumb up and a fave but... I cannot. (I echo 2921306's sentiments.)
Corporal punishment of children is a very sore sticking point for me. I was spanked as a child. Not much, just in the most severe instances. Not with an implement, but simply with a hand. I was spanked the "right way" according to the most popular advice from those who support such things. I even grew up in a culture where it was considered appropriate, so it's not as if I was being singled out for a crappier existence than my peers.
But still... I loathe the memory, and to this day I resent what my parents did to me. It was not right; not in the least. It was abuse, whether it was intentional or not, whether the standards of the time and place disagree or not, that's what it was: abuse. I don't question the fact that my parents loved me, but I put very little stock in their judgement, and consequently, I can't say I respect them as much as a child should respect their parents.
My general disdain for authority has its roots in those punishments. The experience did teach me a valuable lesson, though I doubt it was the intended one: Fear those who would impose their will on you "for your own good".
There are far better and more constructive punishments available for even the most severe transgressions. Punishment through pain only teaches that problems can be solved by hurting another. It implies that the threat of force should be the primary motivator of good behaviour. Suffice it to say, I think this kind of thinking is dangerous and ultimately destructive. It's also insidious, in that it truly does result in short-term gains in terms of improved behaviour, but it promotes attitudes that are profoundly negative in the long term.
As for the story itself...
I feel sick after reading it. Forcing Applebloom to fetch the switch herself? That's just unspeakably cruel, because it expands the punishment to include, aside from physical pain, powerful feelings of dread, fear, and (most disturbingly) helplessness. And I think that is where the abuse truly shines: the feeling of being utterly incapable of escaping your fate, to the point where you are resigned to being an active participant in it. I'll be honest; that is the stuff my nightmares are made of.
And the switching itself went on for... how long? At what point does the lesson "sink in"? Even if I agree that physical pain is appropriate for correcting behaviour, what I just read seems horrifically excessive. I cannot perceive it to be anything but abject cruelty.
I also don't buy Applebloom's rapid recovery. I must again point to my own experience with such punishment: Immediately after a spanking, I would always turn compliant and withdrawn.But inside, I was always - every time - seething with rage and hatred toward my parents. It was in those moments that I would quite literally think, "I don't love you anymore." And though my behaviour would improve, and I would strive to avoid the actions that had precipitated the punishment, I permanently lost a portion of the respect and trust I held for my parents.
I have vowed upon my honour that will never intentionally physically hurt my children as a form of punishment or education. (The only time I would hurt them is in the extremely unlikely circumstance where this would be the only way to prevent some immediate and far greater harm to themselves or others.)
All that said...
I must congratulate the author on writing so well to get such an emotional reaction out of me. This tale is a truly wonderful piece of storytelling. In terms of grammar and technical aspects, I can't fault it. Its characters are solid and (frighteningly) believable. The emotions come through clear as crystal. Bravo.
But... it is the judgement the story presents, the lesson it tries to teach that I so vehemently disagree with that I feel I cannot add a thumb up without feeling like I am agreeing with that lesson. This is a story of (unintentional) abuse being presented as a good and necessary thing. Therefore, I am refraining from any rating of this story. I will simply leave this comment as to what I think of it.
ETA: This story has undergone some edits since I first posted this, including a new extended ending. In the version I read, Applejack was more sure of herself and Apple Bloom's switching seemed to last longer. My comments may seem a bit overstated as a result.
3342476 I agree with this guy too. I'm going to go ahead and thumb-up the story, because it is written well enough, but I do not believe in the message.
I don't personally hold it against those who believe in spanking, but I do believe they are wrong. I know they think they're doing the right thing, but their beliefs are incomplete and formed of ignorance, in my opinion. I am not a professional psychologist, but I do love the subject intensely. And I DO believe that spanking... is a conditioning act which may provide results, but with its own cost. The best way to change behavior, is to teach someone why what they did is wrong, and get them to the point where they regret their behavior THEMSELVES. They have to see it for themselves, and want to punish themselves. If you punish them, especially through such an archaic method as spanking, you may be conditioning them to not do the wrong... but you're missing the opportunity to make it a lasting lesson, and reinforce why it is wrong. Spanking is a fast and dirty conditioning method, that works, but I believe is unethical, archaic, and formed of ignorance. All forms of help can be administered without hurting an individual.
Probably not too feasible at Apple Bloom's age, but in theory (mine anyway) the greatest way one could've handled this is to teach AB why violence and conflict are self-perpetuating cycles, teach AB why these are things we want to decrease, not increase, and inevitably teach AB why, rather than opposing Diamond Tiara and desiring to hurt her, why she should instead be the bigger pony, and try to HELP Diamond Tiara through whatever it is that drives her to taunt the other fillies. If AB was to realize she could be trying to make the world a better place, but instead, just perpetuated the cycles, which in the end, will also make her life harder, it stands to reason AB could've come to GENUINELY regret her actions, not because she knew she'd be punished for them, but because she knew her actions would indirectly be contributing to the thing she dislikes (conflict), at which point her regrets would be her own self-administered punishment, and the lesson would've been much stronger than a switch to the backside could've ever taught.
In the end, we are all entities of consciousness, the bodies we inherit only serve to allow us to interact and manipulate this world. If there is a fault in the mind of another, that manifest through bad behavior, we would always be better served to try to fix the fault of the mind, by increasing intelligence, than by archaic conditioning mechanisms that resort to harming the physical body, in hopes the mind will associate the bad behavior with pain. The problem is... people that spank don't think they're doing wrong. Most of them do it because it was what they were taught to do. These are the kinds of people who don't study psychology, and know their method works, and never bother to ponder what's really at play. These people aren't wrong, not as beings, they're just making a small mistake based on ignorance.
3006184 Not necessarily. Some kids could still become embittered regardless.
In other words, no disciplinary action is perfect. Corporal punishment has its flaws, it's not always right, and even it doesn't always work. Sometimes, like everything else, it can do more harm than good.
Also, I just realized something. Applejack is kinda being a hypocrite. She's failed to reign her anger in plenty of times (not as much as Rainbow Dash but still) so deep down she isn't the right one to give Applebloom a lecture.
All these people crying
It's wonderful
Pain is a good way to show people that they are doing something wrong, and when applied in a harmless instance such as spanking or even a switch such as this (which is a step up from spanking, as a cane would hurt more than a hand), I don't see an issue. In addition to the fact that it wasn't out of anger, or maliciousness, or hate, but rather as a way of teaching, I see no real issue. She wasn't trying to damage Apple Bloom, just give her enough of a sting to allow the memory to remind her that what she did was wrong. The same thing happens in real life. I was spanked a few times as a young child (didn't really work on me since I'm a terrible human being, but don't take me as a control subject), and I'm not horribly scared from it. As long as you do not damage whatever you are spanking or punishing, then you aren't doing any harm, and are in fact helping them with the association pain.
Dear fuck.
First a spanking and then nice words and huggings right afterwards? That doesn't quite fit together, if you ask me.
3555187
And as long they actually understand why. If they don't, then they'll just grow fearful of the person (or pony) administering the punishment.
3724571 right, understanding is key
3555187
Well, the one spanking instance I remember is basically going to a friend's house for a while without telling my parents.
My dad went ballistic since he thought I was kidnapped. What followed wasn't very fun, but it taught me to always inform my parents where I was going before I headed out of the house.
It's effective, but it has to beapplied in the right instance and with the right mindset, as pain is a very sharp double-edged sword. Just as easily, you can cut yourself as your child.
Y'know what? I am thumbing this up.
I am not thumbing it up because I condone corporal violence or really had any experience with it. Nor am I thumbing it down for the fact that you made me feel horrible and a little upset by the end of the story.
I am giving this the thumbs up because this is a very real circumstance. And, a very well written one at that. The emotions between the characters were very genuine and believable. The understanding between Applejack and Apple Bloom during the situation had very solid presence. I see this more as an understanding of how corporal violence is very ingrained in our nature. And, how it influences the minds and emotions of some guardians and children, who were raised with the notion that it is an acceptable punishment. Applejack feels conflicted on whether she did the right thing or not because she knew the pain that she had inflicted on Apple Bloom. And, even though Applejack grew up to be a better mare after having experienced some violent punishment, she herself isn't even sure if it's because of the punishments. She grew up to understand why her daddy would do it, but that probably didn't do away with the lingering thought that he was probably in the wrong for it. A small form of resentment, yet understanding.
So, for Applejack to do the same to Apple Bloom, she still had thought that it was part of what her father did to raise her correctly. But, she also feels that she should be ashamed because, deep down, she's not sure if it was ever right. And, Apple Bloom knew what was coming. Even when she was so close to being completely honest, she still didn't initially tell the whole truth. She had hoped that she would avoid getting into the helpless situation of being spanked. It means that she really does fear the punishment, and even her sister a little. Apple Bloom wanted to get away from Applejack. But, she had the strength to take the punishment anyway. She was taught that it would happen if she messed up enough. And, she probably won't pick a fight ever again.
However, they both continue to remind each other that they still loved one another as sisters. An ending that just makes me feel so twisted inside, yet profoundly enlightened on the implications of the punishment. Whether I like it or not.
You did a fine job writing a truly Slice of Life.
This guy 3933433 captured my feelings exactly. I'm still giving this a thumb and fave even though I don't really feel what AJ did was right for the situation. IMO, DT was the instigator and AB was already physically hurt, so any sort of punishment beyond a talk doesn't seem right to me. That's my opinion though,and beyond that, it's a good story about AJ trying to figure out the right reaction here and being unsure, even at the end. The extra-long hug session is telling to me in that regard. I've always seen AJ as a quasi-mother figure to AB, including when it comes to tough decisions.
TL;DR I disagree but I still like it.
This was beautifully written.
An example of prose I hope to attain.
Also, your example of corporal punishment is a spot on example of how it should be done.
Never let the child believe they are not loved or not accepted.
Amazing work!
2924766
2924766 aawwwwwwwww your profile picture is sooooooooooooooooooooooo cute! (ps im a boy)
4545802 thanks??? That's my SSP <3