• Published 11th Jul 2013
  • 7,053 Views, 115 Comments

Head in the Clouds - Timaeus



After a dispute about the latest Daring Do novel, baking shenanigans, and a very vivid dream, Rainbow Dash finds herself questioning her feelings towards Twilight.

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Epilogue

The sun was slowly setting on the horizon, bathing the landscape in bright golds, vibrant oranges, and ruby reds as the light glinted and sparkled off of the Ponyville lake. Twilight snuggled in closer to the cyan blue wing wrapped around her back and pressed up against her date. The sky itself was another story. A myriad of colours painted the sky, each vibrant enough to stand out but not so much as to overwhelm the eyes. It was as if Celestia and Luna were working together to create the perfect sunset to end a perfect day.

Twilight chuckled to herself; she would have to send a thank you letter to her mentor.

“Whatcha thinkin’ about Twi’?” Rainbow asked, taking Twilight’s hoof in her own as they sat together, watching the sunset from high up on the Ferris Wheel.

“Oh, nothing much. Just today I suppose. It really was wonderful Rainbow, I’m glad you asked me out and I’m glad I said yes.”

“What did I tell ya? I promised you the most awesome date ever, and Rainbow Dash always delivers!” Twilight chuckled, leaning further into the embrace. “That... and I’m really glad I asked you out too, and I’m even happier that you said yes. Why did you say yes anyways? What made you make up your mind?”

Twilight shifted around, sitting up a bit to help clear her thoughts, “Well, honestly? I spent the first six hours or so freaking out about it.”

“You did?”

Twilight nodded, smiling at how silly she realized she had been acting, “Yeah, I didn’t know what to say. You know I went through every book I had in the library dealing with romance and dating looking for an answer?”

“Sounds like you,” Rainbow scoffed playfully, poking the unicorn in the tummy with a hoof.

Twilight stuck her tongue out at Rainbow in response, growing silent for a minute, “I guess I owe this one to Spike and Daring Do. If Spike didn’t calm me down, I would probably have spent all night and all morning freaking out. And if it weren’t for Daring... well, I don’t know.”

Twilight hugged a unicorn stuffy Rainbow had won for her earlier that day. Twilight tried to insist that she didn’t need one and told Rainbow that the games were all fixed anyways, but Rainbow was determined to win her date a prize. It had cost Rainbow a good number of bits and several tries, but eventually she somehow managed to win and Twilight walked away with a unicorn stuffy.

“You should totally name that little guy!” Rainbow chirped victoriously as they rounded the bend to a food stall.

“Hmm, okay then Rainbow, but what should I call him?” Twilight asked, regarding the toy nestled carefully on her back.

“How about Terry?” Rainbow blurted out, handing the vendor a few bits for the fair food.

“Why Terry?”

“I dunno, it just reminds me of something, can’t put my hoof on what though...”

“How did Daring Do help make up your mind?” Rainbow’s voice drew Twilight back to reality. “I thought you said that kind of romance-stuff was unrealistic?”

“It wasn’t that. I went over to the latest book we were reading and looked at your feather, the one we used as a bookmark. Anyways, it brought me back to all of the time we’d been spending together lately, and how much you mean to me. I guess everything just clicked after that. I wanted to give this a shot, and I couldn’t be happier that I did.”

Rainbow smiled adoringly and nuzzled the unicorn’s cheek, “Neither could I, Twi’, neither could I.”

A comfortable silence fell over the two as the sun neared the horizon and the golds and reds of the sky slowly began to fade to black. The yells of joy from the ponies down below began to grow less frequent as they returned home from a day of fanfare and fun.

“Y’know,” Twilight started, looking into Rainbow’s eyes. “We still haven’t finished that book. We at least have another couple of chapters to go through, and for some strange reason I can’t help but hope that things may turn around for Rosetta and Daring.”

“I guess that gives us something to look forward to,” Rainbow smiled mischievously, cupping Twilight’s cheek in her hoof.

“That, and so much more,” Twilight whispered as she nuzzled the hoof.

As the first stars began to shine in the growing night sky, Twilight leaned in wordlessly towards Rainbow. Rainbow closed the last few inches between them, meeting Twilight’s lips with her own, Twilight’s hooves snaking around her back as she drew her in deeper into the kiss as the last light of the sun faded beyond the horizon.

Author's Note:

And with that I bit you all adieu!

I entered this contest with two weeks left before the deadline, so I clearly hate myself to some degree. But overall it's been fun. A light, fluffly story like this was just what the doctor ordered for me and I enjoyed writing it. I can only hope that you all enjoyed reading it!

To my fellow contestants, good luck! I will see you all in the competitor's ring!

Timaeus out.

Comments ( 47 )

As the official Editor Ferret, I guarantee this story 100% Ferret approved. <3

If you think other wise, point out the errors, and I'll have them fixed faster than you can say 'Yay.'

<3 DarqFox
Editor Ferret

Nice ending. All I've gotta say to that.

Best of luck in the contest!

~Skeeter The Lurker

Too bad this was so short. :twilightsmile: I liked it, well I pretty much any ship with Twilight in it.

Awesome story :pinkiehappy: but....... why Terry?

Great job, Tim! This was a fun, light and fluffy read and I enjoyed it immensely. However, may I ask if you've recently read Twilight's list? You may wish to compare the dialogue in chapter 2 from there to the fifth chapter here; I don't know if you did that on purpose or not, but it stood out to me.

See you in the chat! :pinkiesmile:

2870937 I'm pretty sure he was making a reference to The Wind Beneath Her Wings. As in, he told me it was a reference to The Wind Beneath Her Wings.

It was awesome. I Love this chapeter.
You get a 20/10 photo finish's
:coolphoto::coolphoto::coolphoto::coolphoto::coolphoto::coolphoto::coolphoto::coolphoto::coolphoto::coolphoto::coolphoto::coolphoto::coolphoto::coolphoto::coolphoto::coolphoto::coolphoto::coolphoto::coolphoto::coolphoto:

NekoThaCat out-

HNNNNNNNNNNNNNNGHHHHHHHHHHH.

Too bad you can't upvote twice...

That ending was awesome, nice story good luck in the contest.
:twilightsmile::heart::rainbowkiss:

2870862 2870937 2871011
Specifically, I was making reference to the carnival chapter in The Wind Beneath Her Wings, so I couldn't help myself. I was making reference to the unicorn stuffy Twilight got in that chapter, which she later named Terry.

2870978
I didn't even realize at the time, but holy crap, you're right. I blame the fact that I've gone insane lately and have read Twilight's List ten times too many.

2871447 2871876
Thank ya kindly. I'm glad you enjoyed it!

2871475
But... upvoting twice kills the democracy... a system that clearly works in this society and obviously has no problems whatsoever.

2871557
CURSE ME AND MY MAKING REFERENCES WITHOUT MY KNOWING!!!

2871939 Democracy is the worst system. Except for all the others.

On another note, "stuffy?" Who says stuffy? That sounds something dirty.

2872055 Apparently I do and am in the minority in this. Welp.

2871939

Read Twilight's List ten times too many? Huh, that sounds like what I was doing before I notices that all of the contest entries were complete. Aside from the fact that the conversation between Twi and Spike sounded just like the conversation between Rainbow and AJ from Twilight's List, this was great and really fun to read. I'm rooting for you to win this contest.

Good Luck.

Very well done. One thing that makes this story stand out from all the others: you didn't just make it about Twilight realizing why Rainbow cared so much about Daring Do and Rosetta, you made it take time and thought for Rainbow to realize it too. Most people (or ponies) aren't so introspective about their own motivations, nor do they typically project scenarios from a story so consciously onto their own lives to the point of getting upset like Rainbow did. (Subconsciously, sure.) I like that you've treated it as a thing for Rainbow to puzzle out too; it makes it feel less like Rainbow is carrying the Idiot Ball for the story by not just telling Twilight, since Rainbow hasn't even figured it out herself yet.

I've read all of the contest entries, and in my opinion the top two are this one and Daring Dash and Rosetta Sparkle in the Jungle of Perils. The latter has more adventure, and puts more time into building the romance, but this one nails the motivations better by making both Rainbow and Twilight figure it out rather than having Rainbow know all along.

Nicely done! This was a smooth read too. Great pacing in the dialogue, and plenty of tidbits spread throughout to keep both TS and RD busy piecing it all together in their minds.

Good luck in the contest!

Centering your story on Rainbow Dash coming to terms with her own feelings was a stroke of genius. Good luck in the contest!

That was adorable :twilightsmile: sweet and fluffy with just a dash of drama (pun intended) :yay:

Too bad we didn't get to see the whole date :twilightblush:

You pulled off introspective Rainbow nicely (I especially liked the scene in chapter 2 when Rainbow is trying to get some sleep, and the awkward asking-her-out scene).

Good luck in the contest!

Also, reading Twilight's List too many times? How exactly is that even possible? :raritywink:

That, was very, very well done. I really can't find a problem with it. While I wish you had shown the full date, I know how stressful that time constraint can be, and seeing that you entered with only two weeks left, I can't blame you for cutting it out, though I'm glad you included after the date so we know it all went well. Another thing, since I've been spending the past few days working my way through the contest entries, I noticed how most people had Twilight figuring out why Rainbow cared so much about the Daring Do thing. You took it a step further - in a good direction - with Rainbow herself figuring out why she cared, a very well done touch to something like this. It was a very enjoyable read, and you left nothing open for questioning as far as I could tell. Nothing seamed overly-rushed and nothing felt like it could have been explored in more detail. Much like nothing felt like it was given too much detail. The balance you found fit perfectly for this plot and genre. I can only hope you win the contest, you certainly deserve it.

2881585 2885713
Thank you both for the comments! I was originally planning on writing out the date scene itself, but considering time constraints I decided it was best to omit it for the time being (I literally finished the last chapter and epilogue on the last day of the contest with only hours to spare), otherwise it most likely would have ended up rushed and not very well written. Though... keep your eyes peeled for a possible bonus chapter over the next couple weeks :raritywink:

This was pleasant to read and I actually didn't get overwhelmed by the italicized dream sequence (I don't do well with large blocks of italics). Well done!

and then rainbow wakes up from her nap... buck:rainbowderp:

Kissing on the first date.

Excellent work on this! I really enjoyed the dream sequences and the overall pacing of the whole story.

Good luck in the contest! :twilightsmile:

2912077 That appears to be the case :derpytongue2:

:rainbowkiss::pinkiegasp::pinkiehappy:DJNCIENFVIUN you just took my shipping for twidash to a whole other level!!!

You are getting better with each story, Tim. Your writing here is smoother and flows better than older stuff. Keep it up.

Why do I want to write a twidash fanfic now? Awsome story, cute, and very well written.:rainbowkiss::twilightsmile::heart:

2912077
I really like your profile pic
Sips, that magnificent bastard :rainbowdetermined2:

Awww, such a sweet story :twilightsheepish::heart::rainbowkiss:

I kinda wish you went more into the details of the carnival, but I guess since you did this for a competition, you had a time limit. Other than that this was awesome :pinkiehappy:

I'm saddened to see that this hasn't been commented on recently, as this is worth being reread!

Ima try out my canterlot voice!
PART TWO!!!!!!!!!!!

Great story, last chapter rushed but I cant blame your for that. Keep up the good work!

10/10 for this one.

I read this and faved it as well. Hmm...I guess I did read your stories and just didn't realize you wrote them. :twilightblush:

4342354

Hahaha, that's fine. I'm not a terribly well-known writer, so it doesn't surprise me.

Comment posted by LightningBass94 deleted May 5th, 2014

I have a feeling that I read a story with a similar premise before. Scratch that the opening is identical to Experiments by The DJ Rainbow Dash
I assume that the abandon fic started with that premise then because both were written for the Abandoned Fiction Challenge

im late yes but this story it just... connected it was the truth no yes i love you to at the biginning no big kiss it was a natural story honestly
i teared up :fluttercry:

good job and keep up the good work

“What did I tell ya? I promised you the most awesome date ever, and Rainbow Dash always delivers!”

So does Timaeus. Always has a good story to read.

6335622

D'aww, thanks! I'm happy to hear that you liked this one, too. :twilightsmile:

2912077 Your profile picture and name go perfectly with your comment :rainbowlaugh:

Good yarn. One thing, though...

“Why Terry?”

“I dunno, it just reminds me of something, can’t put my hoof on what though...”

Okay, my reference detector is screaming like a fire alarm, but I can't place it.

Ping?

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