• Member Since 3rd Feb, 2013
  • offline last seen Dec 11th, 2023

Paddle Steamer

You are part of an enduring tradition, for over 200 years men and women have served with honour, courage, and wisdom.


What happens when ponies try to force humanity into their hooves? Well Jenkins of course!

June 2nd, 1942. Two days before the Battle of Midway, two days before the tides of power shift in the Pacific theatre and a new threat looms over the horizon. Multi-coloured ponies talk of a "better existence" and "peace and harmony" but at the cost of losing your humanity. Naturally humanity "politely" declines this offer and the war begins, enemies turned allies face the... well to be frank, the shortest war they've ever fought.

Also did I mention how much I hate The Conversion Bureau?

Warning: Stupidity and terrible writing ahead. Health risks include, but are not limited to, severe brain haemorrhaging, stroke and vomiting.

Continue at own risk.

I do not own anything My Little Pony related in this story, other than the story itself.

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 340 )

LOL, no editing required!

(just don't forget the 'gore' tag)

2752567 It already has the gore tag. Silly Gordon.

Don't make me crowbar you. again!

2752591 This story is going to have like 50 comments before it even gets past moderation isn't it?

Oh well. Lets do this! *Clicks submit*

And for the future readers: This is what happens when boredom and Leeroy Jenkins combine. It's not pretty.

You're right. Now let;s get some more comments into this thingy!

2752686 Dammit Gordon! Don't make me get Jenkins in here. :rainbowwild:


(I'm going to try a new tactic with this next sentence)

2752765 No, and STAPH! You're scaring Fluttershy. :fluttershyouch:

Y'know, most of the TCB stories have conflict because the humans' weapons don't work on the ponies. If you take the side with less numbers and lower tech and make *their* weapons not work... yeah, it's a pretty short war. :derpytongue2:

2752925 That's kind of the point to this, who's to say magic would even work here on Earth? :rainbowwild:

Besides, it's Leeroy Jenkins, even without weapons the humans would've won. :trollestia:

hahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!! this is going in the favorites. I can just see all the troops rushing through cities screaming with full speed tanks leading. them everyone meets in Canterlot to have a drunken fiesta.:yay::yay:

2752968 Hell yea. And of course the many statues of Jenkins to honour the war hero.

Honestly I thought this was going to bomb though. I never really considered myself funny, I guess I'm not as bad as I thought. (Not that I'm going to be writing more senseless comedy anytime soon.)

2753029 +1 because Spock is the best. :raritywink:

2753038 I swear to all that is good and holy, this will get featured. Or I shall burn my computer in a fit of rage.

2753048 If this makes it to the featured list I'll have to question my faith in humanity. :rainbowwild:

(Not really, but I would be rendered speechless.)

2753064 The likes are increasing every two minutes, it's inevitable.

2753064 The title is what sold it to me. :rainbowlaugh:

2753069 The likes on my first story were about the same speed and I managed to not make it to the featured list. I'm fairly confident it won't make it there.

Not that I really mind, I expected this to have like 1 like and 20 dislikes by now.

2753082 And not the Leeroy Jenkins pic? *Le gasp*


It has to have a minimum for 4 thousand words to be featured

2753152 Okay then. I wasn't expecting it to make it, even if I forgot about that until now.

Need more stories like this were Equestria isn't as powerful to many stories where Celestia is an all powerful "goddess" I love this.:heart:

The only way this could be better was if all the characters from the ultimate showdown of ultimate destiny was here.

Like for the hell of it.

Oh my God, so true.

Kamikaze!" i just lol to hard


Jenkins is a super solider .he dos not care that he bull rush the enemy

2753235 Dammit Gordon, if it isn't bad enough I'm getting a notification every 2 seconds you have to help.

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