• Member Since 18th Jul, 2014
  • offline last seen April 4th

Underpaid Carronade


A young adult with a degree he hates and a wanting for a life at sea.

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When peace loving equines declare war against humanity, they get more than they bargained for as large formations of bombers fly across the Equestrian skies; easily flying through the shield the ponies had constructed around there "great" country and decimating their cities and towns.

One-shot, Anti-TCB story so if you don't like reading ponies getting blown up by 750 pound bombs this isn't the story for you.

Chapters (2)
Comments ( 244 )

inb4 lordofmyth.

Will read later.


Just make sure the ponies are smart enough to surrender.

I liked this, like, a lot.
+1 Like
+1 Favorite

Not bad. You could use a good editor to fix some word choice and the like.

Two things I noticed though:
-Elmo doesn't have the support for B-52's. Eielson would be the staging point for them, as it has in the past. (I live in Alaska)
-Back in the Cold War era, the all nuclear bombers were hot seated. The crews were rotating in and out as one plane idled while others powered down. At any time 1/2 of the squadron had their aircraft idling or able to be in the air inside 5 minutes. Orders would be delivered en route.

4773596 Don't forget Alondro :rainbowlaugh:

4773609
He's pretty bad too, isn't he?

Maybe not as bad as lordofmyth but still punch-in-the-face worthy.

4773613 He may be bad, but comparing Alondro to Lordofmyth is like comparing a rotten fish to a trashcan full of rotting fish. You get more bull for your buck.

......

Its.... okay?

I don't know. I hate TCB with a passion, but something about your story offends me somehow???

Make a sequel where a a single bomber was inside the shield when they ran away and the crew decides to clear out the survivors :pinkiecrazy:

Never mess with the B.U.F.F.

Well pretty ponies vs 750 Pounds of death, well my Money is on the Bombs. Great one shot

Anti-TCB? What does that mean?

Im pretty sure magic would over power everything we could through at it but what ever.

Oh yes, bomb everything. History has clearly shown that violence solves problems. Granted, we're dealing with unrealistic circumstances, but the principal is still ridiculous.

ha ha ha. Ponies go boom.:pinkiecrazy:

Some punctuation errors. Not bad for a first story, though.

750 lb bombs and B-52s?

Comment posted by Worgen1607 deleted Mar 12th, 2015

4774685

Yeah? 750lb GP bombs.

4774369

Magic can't effect what it has no touch on. Like humans here are devoid of magic and cannot be effected by it's effects.

4774399

I would bomb the fuck out of Equestria if they attacked my homeland.

4773605

I know the story was sheit, I didn't put much effort into this really. It was an idea I wanted to get out.

4774963 Good thing you're not the leader of a nation then. If everyone thought like that, millions of innocents would be killed, no matter where you're from. Surprisingly, returning violence for violence doesn't solve problems. It just creates more.

4774993

The Jews in the Nazi Death Camps were freed through violence, the U.S. was born on violence, The Civil War abolished Slavery in the U.S. through Violence! Our rockets today wouldn't be possible without WW2 and the Germans!

Peace is also brought through violence and war. Harmony through Chaos!

4775011 Yes, but the Jews were brought into captivity through violence, our rockets today aren't necessary, slavery was born through greed and violence.

4775021

Things begin in violence and things end in violence. Also, without our rockets we wouldn't have got to the moon and space.

4775072

Things begin in violence and things end in violence.

The universe has gone from unimaginable, featureless heat to complexity, and will in time return to unimaginable, featureless cold...

4775128

Everything is born in Chaos, and everything will end in Chaos.

4774958 Just because we have no magic does not mean we cant be effected by it. All they would do is use telekinesis and rip the planes right out of the sky. Or teleport the pilot to the outside of the plane midair or teleport the pilots heart to the outside of their chest. Face it If we ever went to war with beings with magic we would be screwed.

4775159 Not chaos. That's a poor, poor synonym for what happens. All will be dispersed, even, smooth. And then nothing will happen ever again.

4775160

Actually, Equestria traveled to a universe without magic. Without a base, it could not function, overtime it may have a small effect but Equestria retreated before magic was able to leave a define print on the planet.

4775188

bombers fly across the Equestrian skies

The planes are in Equestria. A world of magic a place where they would be screwed and even without magic its not difficult to cause a plane to crash if you can get close to it and a Pegasus can To break a jet engine through something big into it like a rock, To disable a plane with a propeller just through a thick rope at the propeller and they are going down. My point its your story is severely floored.

4775261

Actually, the Bombers first wave was a surprise attack. B-52s have no propellers and have more than just 4 engines so they wouldn't just drop out of the sky. Also, a non-magic machine can't be effected since it has no base magic. They had escorts meaning Pegisi would have to deal with supersonic fighter jets with missiles and the tail gunners of the 52s.

They also stay in close formation making them harder targets. As well as being 40,000 feet in the air, thus they couldn't even reach them until they lowered altitude.

4775293 when you think about it, those ponies really need some Democracy , and less Royalty:moustache:

4775305

I hate royalty, thinking they are above everyone else. In America, the government is under the people!

4775314 seems like royalty is working in Equestria :eeyup:

Could've used some napalm.

4775288 Your concept of how magic effects things is based on? I stand by it that earth would loose a fight against things with magic. Did you know there is dragons in Equestria that would simply bat the planes out of the sky like flies. We can keep this going if you really want to. You say something Then I poke holes in it,

Its nice to have a debate were nobody is trolling.

4775160
You are such a fucking retard.

critical criticism criticized

a - your magic seems to function eratically. Pegasi can fly and carry Celestia's chariot, but the potion fails and the dome allows bombs to fall through (unless it is the interaction of magic and non-magic objects where magic fails to act). :rainbowderp:

b - not even in WW 1 did they just send off bombers to 'hit what they could'. Bombers always have assigned targets. And after the amount of time the military has had to work in your story, most of Equestria would already by photo mapped from orbit and appropriate targets selected for a variety of responses. If there had been no deaths, I can not imagine a full scale assault on a major city. :flutterrage:

c-there appears to be no watch or patrols set by Equestria. A unicorn could affect a bomber in variouse ways, but none seem to be present. All trust seems to be placed in the dome, even after the failure of the potion indicates magic may not act as expected. :facehoof:

4774369
4774399
GTFO. They started this shit, we merely wrapped it up. Plus, we could have easily sent Minuteman ICBM with nuclear warheads to all of their major cities, with a huge emphasis on Canterlot.

Now that is out of the way, I've been looking forward to reading this all day.:pinkiehappy:

When peace loving equines declare war against humanity

Not really peace loving now are they? Seems a little contradictory.

It was only few years since the Cold War ended and everyone was on high-alert as soon as it appeared.

A plus for not putting this in a future setting. Most tend to go with somewhere between 2016-2025.

flack shell

*flak

A few weeks later ‘Princess Celestia’ as the ‘Ponies’ called her was able to get a meeting with Ronald Reagan.

If this is after the Cold War (early 1990s), then the president should be George Dubya Sr not Reagan.

All they got was the Princesses bitching about how humanity was impure and needed to be converted into peace loving ponies using a potion.

Afraid war was coming, the United States began stockpiling on weapons.

Again, after the Cold War right? We wouldn't have to stockpile as we still have the previous stockpiles from a few years ago.

only for the potions to have no effects on humans

:pinkiegasp:OH. MY. GOD. Do you have any idea how happy that small line just made me?:pinkiehappy:

I know it's not that good but I didn't feel like putting that much effort into it.

To bad, because this was a great curbstomp.

All in all, this was a nice quick read but it was too rushed. Something like this needs to be fleshed out more. Also, is this really a one shot? Because the story is marked a incomplete.

If the spelling mistakes and a few punctuation issues could be fixed, this story has potential.

As to the ideas of magic being able to simply overwhelm technology? Don't be so sure on that one.

4774984 Iiked it either way so no worries :D

4775669 reading through what had happened with the stuff in the rest of the story, I'd say that the interaction between magic and non-magic things was what happened in here.

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Bombs away, bee-atch.

4775572

You're not poking holes in anything he says.

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