Discord deals with the crippling anxiety of being less successful than his younger brother, Jerry Seinfeld.

Don't worry this is a fic about nothing.

This was the lovely idea voted on by Patrons in October. If you wanna vote on future Patreon projects, consider joining using the link found here.

Proofread by the ever loyal RoMS and Undome Tinwe, and by a new face on fim, SerPounce. All of whom are bae tier and deserve attention.

Cover art was unfortunately created by me, but it used vectors from AceWissle whose stuff is hype.

"That fact that this actually exists has restored my faith in humanity... - IDontWatchMLP

"I think this may well qualify as the strangest crossover I've ever encountered, full stop." - FanOfMostEverything

"This is exactly the proper amount of weird. I love it!" - Heartshine

As part of the School of Friendship's upcoming Charity Bake Sale, the Student Six were asked to help with getting everything ready. Sandbar, Gallus, and Smolder were working on decorating the gymnasium, while the others helped make brownies in the Home Ec room. While cooking, Ocellus and Silverstream asked Yona to go into town and buy some extra ingredients.

Yona does indeed find the items they need, but not in town. In fact, the yak found plant-based alternatives for all the necessary ingredients hidden in Sandbar's hiking bag. If only she knew Equestrian Botany a little better...

William Colley has been a Ranger in the Territoy of Arizona for the better part of a decade.

After three years chasing criminals across the territory, he is closing in on one of his biggest targets yet. Weeks prior, the husband/wife/brother gang had derailed a train to steal the gold a car had been moving east from California. Their heist left behind a ransacked train and 23 slain passengers.

After weeks of hunting, Colley has finally found them.

He awakens besides the rails, in a desert that is almost certainly not his own. Eventually, he'll have to find a way home.

For now, he has to find a new horse.

Spitfire - Captain, lead flyer and idiot-wrangler of the Wonderbolts - has a reputation. Whether she's whipping her wingmates into shape, keeping her trainees in line or sometimes-intentionally scaring little kids, it's hard for many to imagine her not either shouting or being ready to shout at a moment's notice.

That's not to say ponies disapprove. Even ignoring the many times the job or the crowd demand that sort of display, it's not unreasonable to assume she must be under a lot of stress, so few will begrudge her a bit of a raised voice. Still, regardless of the reasons, this does mean that, to most, she is a very scary mare.

It is therefore good, on multiple levels, that no one knows about her secret meetings with one of the most easily scared ponies in Equestria or about what truly happens within her cottage.

An entry in Bicyclette's Crackship Contest that... I'm not at all satisfied with and basically shamed myself into writing. Here's hoping I didn't screw it up too badly.

The Portsmith family is a regular American family living in Denver in 1986. Life is hard, but it is about to get harder when they find themselves hunted by something that is not of this Earth.

Tag explanation: A few scenes of extreme violence. One of the characters is a smoker, so tagging narcotics—some occasional swearing, but nothing too heavy.

A Galaxy at War!

Despairing at his... 'medical insurance coverage'... being cut for the Galactic Republic's war effort, Master Yoda went on a massive binge, only to wake up in a world of magical quadrupeds.

What is a Jedi Master to do but convince the local Sith Lady to join him in selling narcotics?

This story is a sequel to Holiday Gig

When interdimensional fugitive Adagio Dazzle escapes on Hearth's Warming Eve, it falls to Captain Spitfire to track her down to the most miserable place known to ponykind: Klugetown.

And then things get worse.

A Jinglemas 2021 story written for forbloodysummer!

This story is a sequel to Available at the Library

This story is a direct sequel to Available at the Library, that short story should be read first. Narcotics and self harm tags are for one scene near the end that can be skimmed over.

Sleep. A fleeting goal in the hot nights of Summer, out of reach, fitful when it does come. The university is closed, the library is near empty. Wiser ponies retreat to cottages on the mountain, or away from Canterlot altogether. Those that remain in the magic city lie in bed, and dream of strange things shimmering in the heat.

Floating in the dreamscape, those strange things watch and begin to file their teeth in anticipation of the coming hunting season.

EDIT: Grammar update on the advice of EqD.

Sunset Shimmer, Rainbow Dash, Rarity, and Applejack wake up in a drop pod as someone welcomes them to a corporation called Deep Rock Galactic and remembers nothing about how they ended up in this situation. With guns in one hand and pickaxes in the other, they must work as a team if they want to make it back to the surface.

Pinkie Pie wakes up in a small cabin aboard a space station. Upon finding the quality of her new homes's food particularly low, she volunteers her skills as a master chef and lands a spot in the station's bar.

Fluttershy isn't of much use to Deep Rock Galactic at first, but that changes when she saves a dwarf's life in the medical room, and her new employer pays surprisingly well for a company that sends people to fight bugs miles underground in dark, scary caves.

Twilight Sparkle seemed too smart to be sent to the surface, so Management puts her on the Research and Development team in hopes that she can help them develop better tools and equipment for conquering the harsh world of Hoxxes IV.

Together, the friends must work harder than they ever have before if they want to survive the caves, climb the ranks of DRG, and--fingers crossed--return home.

Crossover with the game Deep Rock Galactic, which is a 1-4 co-op first-person shooter where you all play as dwarves that go down to the depths of a hostile alien world and mine minerals because Management pays you to. It's a hell of a lot of fun, and I highly recommend playing it with your friends.

I'm not sure how often I'll update this one, but it's still going to be a great adventure either way.

Character Progression Tracker and explanatory blog here. If you want to know what the girls can and can't do, this is the first place you should look!

EDIT: Added the "Narcotics" warning to cover myself as the girls begin using the complementary bar. In this story, it is assumed that all characters are of legal drinking age other than Twilight for the first while because she specifically mentions it (Don't underage drink kids). Alcohol is the only drug I will be using in this story.

Our protagonists awakens in Equestria as a kirin with only a bare bone understanding of the world they are now in.

And after a bad encounter with Trixie our protagonist Amber Wood has decided to stick around Ponyville.

Will living in Equestria help heal the wounds her old life left behind.

This tale begins just before the start of the series.