• Member Since 30th Sep, 2012
  • offline last seen September 9th


Comments ( 58 )

I do wonder what could have caused Twilight to disappear after writing out that jumbled up sentence and did Rainbow Dash along with Rarity Applejack, Pinkie Pie and Fluttershy also disappear with the other townsponies?

I'm wondering the same thing. But then again, I get what the Author is going for. I do enjoy imagining what could've happened to them, along with everyone else in the town. Sometimes, I like it when they leave it up to interpretation.

Wow, that was good! I wonder what happened to the townsfolk, that is really intriguing!

Very well done, Legion! Like others have said, leaving it open for interpretation is a good way to end it. No need for, "Everyone disappeared because of reason X, and we must save them by reason Y."

Stuff like this is always best left with not too much context, but just enough to give some understanding.

Sounds like a False Hydra absolutely wrecked Ponyville.

What is a false hydra?

A false hydra is one of the most terrifying homebrew Dungeons and Dragons monsters ever created. It sings a song that makes people unable to perceive it. As it kills and eats people it sings a song that makes people forget that those people existed and forces them to somehow fill in the logical gaps for the missing people. I'm not really doing the sheer horror of this monster justice. I suggest this video for a good explanation:

Thanks for answering my question and providing the video link as I'm writing this reply I'm currently watching the video to learn more about it. I know one thing for certain, I would NOT wanna encounter one.

Howdy, hi!

This was a super fun read. Loved the slow build-up and pay-off at the end as well as the subtle hints of missing ponies and the like. Also, its funny with the comments mentioning a false hydra because I literally just watched a video the other day explaining it.

Anyways, this was a great short read, thanks!

sounds like a false Hydra attack

empty houses and buildings in general are unsettling to me. A whole town full of them... no thanks


Help me it took him oh Celestia it took him and ate him and I watched and smiled and its singing again

Well damn. That's messed up. Good story though!

Slight correction: it's "I watched and it smiled", not "I watched and smiled". Otherwise, good job! It's definitely nice to have an easier way of reading this.

I agree with the general assessment of it being a False Hydra. It’s the only thing I can think of that could both pull this sort of thing of, and actually ‘sings’, for a given definition of such, while doing so.

Well that was gruesome and the context of what it might be just sent shivers down my spine. What I find particularly interesting is Dash's part. Always being up on a cloud likely made it difficult for the False Hydra to attack her thus I'm guessing it likely waited until it was either powerful enough, desperate or we can hope that Dash may have simply flown off bored of the ghost town. That could actually make an interesting sequel, her being interviewed by Celestia. The only survivor and being away from the beast she slowly gets some of her memories back. Another horrifying idea.

Just from the description and the comments I've seen - is "Everyone" really the appropriate rating for this story? I'd argue nothing labeled "Dark" and "Horror" really falls under that rating, but there are things revealed in the comments that definitely go beyond "E".

Yes… nothing in the story is explicit (except perhaps that one line on the end) so the story is A Ok for everyone. Comments? Well, in school, over a decade ago I was taught to not read comments or click random links and many other little tips that are completely ignored in today’s world.

The author is not responsible for the content in these.

11203931 I meant the comment spoilering that someone gets eaten in the story. That's not E content.

In the comments so… that is the viewer’s fault for reading them first. And… you just said it; I hardly feel that mentioning de… *ahem* ponies “going away” is hardly safe reading for minors.

Have you no shame for posting such Teen or Mature content in an E story?

There comes a point that the line gets real blurry. This story does tread close but since it does have dark and horror tags parents might believe them and say no to reading it.

In truth I simply forgot about the rating system.
But now that I’ve checked FAQ, I think it still fits under E.

I like how things start subtle but snowball rather quickly.

Oh hoh, I like this. :moustache:

That creepiness buildup was very well-paced,:raritywink: which is extra impressive considering the short length you had to work with.

Disappearances, coupled with collective amnesia of the community in regards to the vanished individuals, is super unsettling to watch unfold :pinkiecrazy::unsuresweetie:. And, I just love the mystery of horror stories told through letters or journals.:raritystarry:

Overall, the feel was reminiscent of WHITE by Crimmar and Flashgen's epic, multi-part tale that started with A FLEet|ng LIght |n thE DArknEsS: both of which are some of my favorite horror stories I've read on this site.

Awesome work! :twilightsmile:

Welp, looks like I'm not sleeping tonight.

hElpHelpheLpmEiTtoOkhiMohCelestiAitTotoKhimItatEhimAndIWatcHedaNditSmileDitiSSingiNgagaIn like there was a fight or something!

And it looks like I left a candle burning on a shelf, and now it and all the books there are charred beyond repair. Fortunately, the tree has a fire-resistance enchantment. Otherwise, the whole place could’ve burned to the ground!

I imagine Spike really put up a fight before he was eaten. Oh, my heart hurts. It stings! This was so terrifyingly done, Legion. Something about watching the world around you die, and yet being totally clueless because you have no control over what you remember is horrifying to me. Very, very well done. :fluttershbad::heart:

There are no librarians in Ba Sing Se Ponyville

I know of a place i think in Missouri that is an entire town of hundreds of abandoned mansions.

All broken down, empty, etc.

Billions of dollars worth of mansions.

sounds like a false hydra is there !

Okay, it got really freaking creepy there at the end. Is it really a False Hydra or something like it in ability, like an SCP with similar "song of forgetfulness" powers?

Please tell me that was because of the real estate bubble popping in 2005, not because there's an actual monster eating the residents...:twilightoops:

The real estate thing. Dont worry, we are safe.

for now

It's hard to be scared of any dnd monster because they all pale in comparision to the rust monster at the end of the day. False hydras might take away your friends, memories, and even life, but a rust monster will take your stuff and that's infinitely worse. You can get new friends, memories, and even a new life, but that +3 longsword of flames was truly irreplaceable.

The fear of the unknown, the attack by a monster that is extremely violent but also has the ability to make survivors forget it even happened. Absolutely terrifying, like carbon monoxide but in animal form.

Holy shit. Didn't know Ponyville had a sewer system big enough for a fledgling false hydra.

10/10, great story!

Great job!

The really intriguing possibility is that there was always a False Hydra in the town, and only now did it decide to really strike.


I mean, obviously the only reason the creature was there was to escape an even greater, waxy monster.

Yeah. Though I agree with everyone else about the False Hydra. I wanted to be the only one that thought of a different creature and I just read this after rewatching Ed Edd n Eddy for nostalgia.

And now thanks to you I will be forced to watch it again for nostalgia, haha. :pinkiehappy:

You're welcome. Have a great time reliving the nostalgia.

Well written, and rather scary. :raritydespair: Good job! :pinkiehappy:

Ah, a false hydra, very nice. Good short story.

Another day, another record in Equestria's SCP files.

I loved this story!
It's short, but it sets up suitable atmosphere very well!
Now I wanna read more! :D

I love horror genre, and storytelling via diaries/letters is very good method, if it is written well.

(This story reminded me my #1 favorite Fleeting Light In The Darkness series.)

be chilling if we get a few spin off of the others pony pov written stories from each of twilight friends "normal" days before disappearing and whom they forgot along that tragedy in motion or saved by chance and luck!
oooh even like perspective of maybe even the non main like the tragic tale of a teacher and her students. i bet the false hydra save the little one as special meals...

I will admit this story did remind me of my first horror story I read on this site. I cant recall what the title was, but it was about a flying ship supposedly loaded with treasure that lured in Pegasi and ate them. Like a giant mimic.

The story you're thinking of is The Bird Feeder - a VERY good horror fic, in my opinion. And yes, I also made the Mimic connection - in fact, if I were the type to run a DnD campaign, I'd consider Homebrewing a properly sized breed of Mimic to play such a role.

Ha, I actually did something similar when I was DMing for my friends.
An abandoned ship in the sea, its cargo hold full of mimics.
That was fun, when they realized what was going on.

Ah right.... kept thinking it was Bird Cage or something like that. Thanks :)

Man that's one story that made flutters scary af, but the Twilight focused 3rd and 4th parts were fun, you could almost hear that guard wanting to shout at her that she's crazy

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