• Member Since 18th Apr, 2014
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Well, this a fan of MLP who has just started to watch the show. And I like what I see!


This story is a sequel to A Moon and World Apart

Luna and Celestia have settled their differences. With one major obstacle settled, Equestria and the Lunar Republic are coming back together as allies and partners. But danger still lies ahead, and not all are happy with the new arrangements. More challenges await the Royal Sisters, along with Twilight Sparkle, Sunset Shimmer and their friends, as the world continues to change.

Second in the Worlds-verse, and a part of the greater The Powers That Be multiverse.

Has a TV Tropes page here.

Chapters (6)
Comments ( 50 )

Back on this new tale we see the cast picking up the pieces from the previous tale, glad to see Rainbow's adapted to her new wing very quickly, course now we have to wait for her parents reaction to it! :rainbowdetermined2::twilightoops:

As for the 2 major culprits to this whole fiasco, I hope they both pay for it......IN SPADES!!!! :twilightangry2:

She looked over at Princess Celestia with a slight smirk. "Also, it will allow me to personally introduce you and our niece to Shining Armor's parents. I know his mother especially is very much looking forward to meeting Cadance, after hearing about how close they became during her son's time down here."


But that was still in the future; they still needed to deal with the here and now. Looking too far had landed them in this spot and it was not a mistake they would be willing to make again.

You're learning, good :eeyup:

Seeing as they were able to handle things, Luna bid them a friendly goodbye before she went to take care of matters she had been putting off for far too long: seeing how the patients from the attack on the Orion, including her precious student, were faring and if she could tease Twilight about her crush on Sunset yet.

Do it :trollestia:

"There wasn't any way that you could have known what he was going to do or what he was truly like," Rarity said.

Ohhh, that comment is gonna sting a bit :trixieshiftleft:

A Critique Of A Moon Apart and Its Sequel

I wrote this because I really really liked it. So...

A thought grew like a tree after finishing this chapter. I will attempt to be as clear as possible. I am also aware that perhaps your seeking a lighter story. But considering the blood and the explosions. I will be continuing under the assumption that you folks want to write darn good story that is on the serious side.

First off a personal definition.

In this story I find the trope [that has a proper name but I will call it "My Beautiful Darlings."

- I define this as author(s) unwillinginess to have their character exprience narrative consquences, failure of any kind? Perhaps even death or risking changing in their favorite characters.

I give this definiton to stress what I am about to say. I loved the first story and am enjoying the second. But, it is becomeing apparent that , Rainbow, Twilight, Sunset, AppleJack...etc. And especially Celestia and Luna. Which is whom largely prime drivers of the storys plot...will never be allowed to truly change

Rainbow Loses a wing.

A great pivotal moment in Rainbow Dashs character could have been losing a limb. Heck for everyone there could have the tension raised...The haunting knowledge that they could have been next. But...

You guys did not do that. Im not sure why. But I will point to my definition above. I give this definition because I have read many storys that have this very obvious problem. The author(s) so in love with their characters that they never want anything bad to have happen to them.

They want them to never change. Thus the thing they are trying to create a story. Loses some of its bite.

Note: It is important to acknowledge that lets say that you always wanted her to get her wing back. You could have keep the tension but in wanting so badly to ensure RD would always fly. You did not want to change your idea of RD. But you could have and made it more interesting to RD...as the character that was still awesome with out direct flight.

Note: This comes off as if RD is less herself if she can not fly. Or put another way...could she not have perhaps looked to Pinkie and her lunar counter parts? Or even the other nations to fly other ways? Their by continue her dream in some manner? Allowing both narrative flow and Consquences to exist harmoniously?

Perhaps you could have played with the idea that in such rigid caste that you have inadvenerly implied. Destiny would not play since Rainbow Dash with out her wings. Thus with your consistence and largely other folks desires....Perhaps everyone chooses to reject any concept of fate and destiny. Creating a lusious story that harkens back to ancient human myths about rebeling against Gods for the beauty of free will.

But...this is in truth very forgivable to the introduction of Celestia battle scene.

The battle of Canterlot

Well written and frankly very thrilling. I equally loved your use of the battle to introduce other characters (we know. But not yet in this story. Thus giving off a different first impression. This is excellent story telling.]

What falls for me is the chain. I was excited, thrilled even as I went reading. But that was undercut by a nagging fear. A worry even. This is largely due to your immediate attachment of RDs new wing. Thus taking tension away. Followed by a luke warm villian in what ever their name is...

I felt a touch of worry. Surely the chain so like RDs wing would not be resolved with No narritive consquences?...


I was wrong.

Oh, surely their was a threat to lesser mortals. And as you have stress the importance of your darlings. Whats a few nameless redshirts to add to the tension?

Except I knew...I know. I have read storys that were afraid to harm their darlings. So when Celestia broke free with nary a spit take...well?

I knew the ending of your story. At least I think.

Celestia and Luna cross the stars. Perhaps a strategic bruise and a tiny cut on their cheek. Just to let everyone know how tough and grateful they are for their godhood. Endless power? Ability to conviently fix most narrative problems?

Twilight and Sunset become Alicorn. CUTE! VERY wonderful to read about.

The others...not so important. Maybe?

So after the battle ends. When it could have stressed the harrowing nature of life. How even supposed gods can die. And how even mortals matter...

See above Redshirts dieing. And repeated references to the power that these manifestions of reality possess. Since you seem unwilling to have narrative effect your characters.

A alternative to what was written would could have been Celestia losing a wing. Then RD and Luna could help her learn how to fly again? Does that sound spicy? Then you can dig deep into the idea that she is more then immortality and power. She is a person. beyond her power. That is still worthy despite to having it. Thus...

This would also create tension for later threats to equastria. Give your other character the ability to shine a little brighter.

This touchs on a double problem that is kind of odd. You have two very very advanced countrys. God run countrys with the ear of mare and pony? in Milk Way. The nightmare is on speaking terms with Luna. They equally so...regardless who is the elements are. They also have the elements.

Any country you introduce will look weak and feeble before the practically perfect countrys. Not that they do not have faults. But having just the right kind faults to not be embrassing and cqll foul. See a tiny cut on the cheek a beefy antihero. He has flaws. Or the utterly beautiful but wait! Their is mole on their left nostrel that some how makes them just the right amount of relatable and only 96.44% of the population loves them! Oh! And anyone that disagress with them [cough princess. Absolute Dictators cough] They are ugly! And a...a...a...CAHANGELING!

See ugly...

Further because the narrative if so heavy on pone. It has top heavy problem that will not go away when introduce more elements to the story. Since screen time will not be shown to other elements of the story. That are not necesarilly countrys But anything interesting that bucks the trend of Divine rulers, and The elements are largely perfect.

See cut on cheek. [Aka no one has actual flaws that conflict and cause tension] Its like the idea that you can be in a fight. Is worse then getting into one?


Presenting all of this information do you see the problem?

Their is no danger for anyone. I was looking forward to the further political andventures but it seems that essentially with two super powers together. All that they have at their disposal? Where is the fear? They would steam roll anyone they negiate with?

The main spice of last fic was the drama between Luna ane Celestia. Other then the Slice of Life elements and very very evil ponies with little complexity? Where is the greater story when they can just win? Since the author favor the ponys? And no injury can ever stick? Im sure if say Sunset lost her horn a ancient magic would be introduced to keep that happy happy. Its not like you can have a nuanced engagement with these elements with out losing tension.

Essentially for a summary. With your commitment to nothing ever sticking bad wise to your ponys. The story loses a lot of tension. And in not creating nuanced villians or say? A element that was racist? How spicy would that be?

It makes me feel like I all ready know the ending. Because you have shown me that you would rather characters stay the same. Thus writing a more predictable story.

Finally i will say I did the love the prequel and will be reading this story. But I felt since you seemed to like comments. I figure as a author perhaps you would appreciate a critique on the largest issue? If not the only issue which really is the same big issue in many story.

That folks love the main six and princess so much that, they forget that to read a fanfic is too want a story. And the BEST storys have consquences for their characters. For me...

Ps. Have you read Cold? It reads well and shows what I am talking about. Is it perfect no? But all I am saying is that I should not be able to imagine the ending for your story.

Colds ending...Well that would be spoilers.

Pps. Forgive the typos. And if you want clarification feel free to ask for it. I hope that I keep my tone light.

I hope you have a good evening. :twilightsmile:

Naturally feel free to critique my critique.

Ps.A added thought. Your so commited to having your characters being super good and the bad guys super bad that make the story. Some what predictable. Not entirely mind But it definetly there.

Pps. This also includes your villians. Why not have a villian win at some cultural touch stone that will last more then two paragraphs?

Picking up where you left off? I greatly approve!!

10893211 Maybe some of us want that? Have you ever considered that? Maybe we want a story where the heroes win, the bad guys lose and the narrative tensions are resolved.

If you don't want that, there's a simple answer. Don't read this story. Go find something that does it for you. 'The Thousand Year Change' would be perfect for you. Same basic premise, but in the end, while the bad guys lose, the protagonists win a phyrric victory where hundreds of thousands of ponies are needlessly dead and everything is changed. Greed and stupidity ruin both worlds and everyone is left scarred.

Personally, I prefer this.

Hmm...I said I liked the story? Should I not critique a work? My critique literally says this. Did you read it? Or are you commited to defending a story that is beyond reproach? Unless the author(s) choose to read my comment and asked me delete it? [Which is cool:eeyup:] What did I say that was so poor? Why should I not be allowed to speak my mind?

Should a comment section only be filled with praise? If you happened to read my critique. I make deliberate point of not being overly critical. Only pointing out two potential problems in the narrative. Perhaps...if you were the actual authors? I could understand? Whats the harm in giving a nuanced take on storys I like?

Ps. Is that not what a comment section is for? Too discuss? :facehoof:

Pps. Remember the Authors can defend themselves just as well. They even can disable comments? Or even delete comments? I have to do so on one my storys - due to Sweetie Bot invasion! ::trollestia:They also can put notes to only have positive comments?. Which I did not find? Perhaps I am wrong? Should I only speak when I have something glowing to say?

But whats the point in my opinion of having comments of if it only tells you what your good at?

Ppps. My post was inspired by reading old comment threads where dialogue was had with one of authors and commenter? about their story? Hmm, curious?

Regardless...have a good day. Thanks for commenting!

While I do agree that Rainbow's lost wing was solved too easily, it doesn't mean there won't be consequences. Rainbow's dream is to be a Wonderbolt, and although not flying crushes that dream, she still may not achieve it. It can also set up up other conflicts, questioning her loyalty to Equestria, for the Wonderbolts were originally a quick response team. Only in the modern times are they stunt fliers. Secondly, this quick resolve sets something up for later down the line, and this plot I believe will be much more enjoyable.

Thanks for the comment. I think you may be right! I think with two good writers they will whip up something great!

Now that the sisters have reconciled, I wonder if the Lunarians will adopt the Equestrian Bit(like many European countries that adopted the Euro) or will use its own currency.

Aaaaah, so, despite her strong exterior, Rainbow Dash is or has developed a scar on her spirit from what has happened. Is that PTSD I foresee in her near future? Man, I feel bad for her. But she IS a strong pony with great friends at her side. I'm sure she'll make remarkable progress in overcoming this... Once she opens up about it with them, of course.

And, wow, I kinda knew it wasn't a cut-and-dry process, but there's clearly still A LOT to do between the worlds. I really do have to agree with Luna on the point of reintroducing the monetary system to the Republic.

Do they REALLY need to give it the populace as a whole? Can't they just let the government be the only ones who use it? After all, they are going to be the ones in the most contact with Equestria now. It shouldn't be hard for them to create a federal reserve and issue out currency to the citizens on an as-needed basis, right?

.....oh wait. That's kinda the model that communism is based off of, right? Still, at least THIS particular branch isn't a tyrannical military dictatorship obsessed with having the largest gun in the world. So, maybe this way could work out better...?

I do not trust her or anyone currently with that department. I propose that a full purge of all of Neighsay's flunkies be initiated first before we start seeing to the new Director's placement."

It's not suprising that they feel this way, this is probably the first real instance of a betrayal like this that the Lunar Republic has ever experienced :trixieshiftleft:

beginning to recover from so many years of maintaining the spell that had kept anyone else from teleporting to her moon. Now that she'd dismissed that spell, she had a lot more magic available to her,

I hope you still have some alarms up, just in case :applejackunsure:

They have to deal with it. One way or the other. This is the best route

I don't think the Republic would have enough funds for a stable trade without fully adopt the monetary system. I don't know what's valuable enough on the moon that can sustain the Lunarian Reserve. Even with the Lunarian advanced manufactured goods , I doubt the Republic could manufacture enough products to keep up with the Equestrian demands. The Republic is indeed advanced but it is small and lacking the industrial capacity to keep up.

Then there's the pollution problem, any sort of mass production industry will certainly release any kind of pollution unless it's powered by renewable energy(which as far as we all know, the Sun). I don't know if the Lunarians have Nuclear technology or not and wind energy is out of the question. They either have to retrofit a dome with a filtration system to get rid of the pollution or build a new dome equipped with one, both are time consuming and costly.

Other than any long term solution, I don't know any other way to fill the Lunarian coffers for a short while other than the introduction of the taxation system(which means total adoption of the currency system) and trading a few tonnes of raw material to keep the Lunar commerce afloat for a while they develop the aforementioned establishments.

Oh yeah. A space-age technological society that had lived in isolation fir a thousand, with a government that has NEVER needed a currency before, could NEVER manage to build up a federal reserve that is ONLY needed when dealing with foreign nations. Nope, better to COMPLETELY revamp their society to match the one they'd fled from originally than to keep to the model that's been working for 1,000+ years.

Yeah, obviously, I know NOTHING about how societies work and bow to your superior intellect.

Woah, woah woah, hold on! no need to get antsy. I didn't say they can NEVER build up their federal reserve. I said that by fully adopting currency, it'll fill up the coffers faster. Regardless if you're a futuristic civilization or not, when you're just ending your isolationist policy, you need to adapt with the others to get your commerce going at full capacity. Equestrian merchants wanted bits, they're not gonna get a lot if you're using the barter system and your market wouldn't attract as much buyers/merchants if your goods can't be traded with money.

Honestly, if you're saying that only governmental elements should use currency, the government alone can't manufacture quick enough to keep up with demand. You need artisans, engineers, machinists and industrialists to ramp up production and they need to be paid with some sort of a reward. Do you expect they wanted only magical knowledge that Equestria is well known for? No, they're not that useful when you have technology to keep up and it'll function as an auxiliary rather than primary. Goods from Equestria alone wouldn't satisfy them because Equestrian goods are not that advanced, besides the plants for agriculture, they need bits to keep business flowing.

I'm not saying that your method is not applicable, it is, but it'll be time consuming for the Republic to gain a much more worthwhile profit especially if they intend to quickly rebuild the Orion.

Anyway, I'm just stating my opinion. No need to get jumpy.

You're trying to quote economics on me? Okay, if you can solve this little issue, then I'll back off. You must know about the basic principles of supply and demand, yes?

"The cost of something can be partially determined by these two factors. If you have something that everyone wants but is in low supply, then you can charge extra for it. But at the same time if you have something everyone desires but there is a surplus, then the cost will drop because people will know they can go elsewhere to acquire it."

As you've already pointed out, Equestrian goods are gonna be rather undesired once some of the necessities like food, freshwater, and basic raw materials have been acquired. They don't even technically need to go to Equestria to get those either.

By contrast, a good deal of Lunarian goods (or rather services and knowledge) will be in HIGH demand once the quality and superiority of them have been proven. Cybernetic enhancements and/or replacements? Can Equestria put up a competitive market against THAT?! Can ANY nation on Equus for that matter? And how long do you think it'll take such knowledge to become more mainstream down on the planet? I'm say upwards of a decade or two, and that's if the Lunarians are being generous and sharing their medical technology and knowledge.

IE: The Lunarians could make any price demand they want because they hold the monopoly on cybernetics and other such stuff. Meaning, again, that only the government and government-sanctioned ponies who will be transported down to the planet will be requiring actual currency whereas the common civilian up in the Republic will NOT be needing it.

Alright, first things first, Celestia said that for the time being they would only share medical knowledge and advanced technology yes? I think somewhere in the story(or the prequel story) said that(correct me if I'm wrong) that Equus is not yet prepared to receive the Lunarian technology in certain aspects like weaponry since it might be exploited by the rich and the nobles or something, I can't remember.

Alright, since weaponry is out of the way let see what other knowledge the Lunarians have to offer. Telecommunications, the PCA is a great communucations device albeit lacking privacy as explained in the prequel story. So it will be very expensive right? The PCA will be very expensive that I bet only the nobles would be able to buy it and where do most of the nobles live? That's right, Canterlot. If the nobles want to buy the PCA, it serves the purpose to communicate with other nobles near and far (I doubt they want to call the 'commoners', not that they can buy one anyways) . That's the first problem, right there. Since most of them live in Canterlot, they would always meet each other in person be they at galas, tea parties etc. This kills the purpose of the PCA and thus the need to possess one(unless it's for boasting that you're rich).

Besides the nobles, there's another organisation that has desires for the PCA, the military. By adopting the PCA, coordination and communication will be hundredths times easier than the pegasus letter express. Now, here's the second problem. In the last story, I-don't-remember-who commends Spike's ability to send letters, in the process he/she also explained that although the PCA is a really good communications device, it lacked privacy which means it's bad at keeping thing hidden. Now, we all know that any information the military relayed to supreme command or the lower echelons of the military should be done in secrecy unless if told otherwise. So, unless the Lunarians develop a much more privacy-centred PCA, I don't think the military would be using it any time soon lest risking information leak(do note that the Lunarian military utilises the PCA because if the information is leaked they wouldn't know who to leak it to, you know being isolated on the moon for 1000 years and stuff).

Robotics, I'm certain the Lunarians have that since they have dockyards to build the Orion. I don't see the use for robotic machinery on Equus, since they haven't invented automobiles and metal ships yet. Many of them are built with wood, you don't need robots to build a wooden ship or a wooden carriage, you need craftsmen. The only use for robots in Equestria that I can see is the canning industry and for surgery which I doubt would be affordable for the common folk. So, it's a nice thing to have, but not desperately needed.

Medicine, the one aspect that Lunarians would be happy to share. Now, penicillin and anaesthetics would be valuable for Equestria, that's certain. Do note that those things will be damn expensive, if Celestia wishes to buy them, she would buy as much as she could so she could distribute it equally to hospitals in Equestria(or in the big cities only). Alright, do remember that there are only six domes on the moon, primus: administration, secundus:energy, tertius:residential, quartus:agriculture, quintus:resources and sextus: RnD. You can see none of them has any significant industrial capabilities to produce said products to fulfill Equestria's demand since Equestria is large. I'd wager about 10 years to produce enough medicine to be distributed throughout Equestria and another 10 to keep the supply stable. Which means medicine would be only available to the nobles since it would be expensive for the middle class and lower. Most nobles are likely to sit in one place not go anywhere else which means they rarely get sick. Unless if there's a plague there's little use for medicine if you're not rich. The military would also refuse to buy it since there haven't been a war for the past 1000 years, most of the injuries inflicted during accidents and drills can be fixed with the current Equestrian technology albeit time consuming.

Prosthetics, the most emphasised technology in the story. Once again, the cost would discourage the patients. I bet they would rather not fly and stay as an amputee than watch their family go broke just to buy some prosthetics. Prosthetics would be undoubtedly useful in the military for obvious reasons. However, do remember that Equestria has been at peace for 1000 years, so I believe the old guards of the military would say that it's a waste of money to buy prosthetics if there's no war(there's the incoming changeling threat and Tirek but they don't know that). Once again, only the rich would be able to afford it.

What's the point of buying it if only a few of your entire population can use it? It will rot in the storages unless if they're sold to other countries which I doubt would be profitable. Let's see the potential business partners:
1. Griffonstone, that place is a dump, those Griffons would be broke to buy a single Lunarian product.
2. Yakyakistan, Prince Rutherford hasn't ended his isolationist policy yet. Trade talks wouldn't be possible. Even if they open their borders, I doubt the yaks living in wooden huts and thatch could afford one anyway.
3. Crystal Empire, hasn't appeared yet.
4. Changelings, haven't discovered yet. Hostilities would end any trade talks.
5. Saddle Arabia, a potential candidate but they wouldn't buy in large quantities for obvious reasons.
6. Dragons, they don't see a reason to lose their hoard just to buy some pony sized futuristic thingamajig. Cold relations with Equestria discourage trade talks. Do note that Ember isn't the dragon lord yet.

Those technology and knowledge would no doubt be handy for the Equestrians, but in their eyes it's more of a desire and luxury rather than a requirement and necessity. It's certainly useful to have it, but the Equestrians feel like they don't need it at the current time, maybe they will in the future but that's the future. The stuff that the Lunarians have to offer are undeniably great but the Republic's limited capability to produce a steady flow of supply and the overwhelmingly expensive cost would hamper the profits for technology sharing.

Oaky, big lecture aside, I've STILL yet to see why the Lunarians NEED a new currency. All I've seen so far is you saying the Lunarian products will only be affordable to the super-elite of Equestrian society. Which, again, fails to explain why the common Lunarian (who is as likely to venture planetside as a Manehatten fast food server is to head up to the moon) needs to completely change their society when they will have no interaction with Equestria, the merchants, or anypony unless special circumstances allow. Which, again, would likely only happen under special government approval. Hence, either the Equestrians will be bringing their own bits or the Lunarians can be given a set amount by from the government reserve.

So...? What? Are you saying the interplanetary travel between the Republic and Equestria is going to become common in the next few weeks and months that every Joe, Jane, and Smith, from the lowliest beggar to the Princesses themselves will be strutting about the Republic as casually as if they'd been born there?

That's, really, the only way I could POSSIBLY see the Republic NEEDING to change so drastically so quickly. And yet, even with Luna bringing down the anti-teleportation, I just can't see too many unicorns having the raw power needed to even reach the surface of the moon. Never mind trying to accurately land within the domes!

No, no. Of course not. Free travel is most certainly unavailable at the moment. But, no free travel doesn't mean that trade ships can't do business. I bet the Republic has a few small crafts that can transport small stuff if they're capable of building the Orion. Maybe the Lunarians can travel to Equestria to sell stuff and buy but not the other way around.

Besides the expensive techology stuff, the Lunarians have other cheap knick-knacks to sell when they arrive to Equestria to sell. Of course if you wanna buy some.. I don't know, textiles, jewelry or some apple cider you gonna need some bits and Equestrians will use bits to buy your stuff. Sure, Luna have some bits to spare, but that's1000-year old, valuable bits which I found to be a liability to use just to buy some cheap Equestrian stuff.

Of course you need to make stuff if you wanna sell 'em. I don't think the Lunarians would focus most of their funds on cottage industry. Said industry will be underpaid if the Republic focuses on other matters(Orion isn't cheap) . You need extra money and that's where currency comes in, with a currency, you gain money through taxation which means more income. More income means higher funds for cottage industry which means cheap consumer goods can be produced more and be sold more which generates more income. It'll create a win-win cycle for both nations.

Okay, THAT concept i can mostly agree with. But I slightly disagree too. Near as we know, while they have been building the Orion for interstellar travel, we've had no mention of interplanetary travel ships or even drop-pods akin to what was used on Celestia in the "A Thousand Year Change" story.

All we've seen so far is teleportation from and to the moon. Admittedly, it was far quicker than a dropship reentering the atmosphere and arguably safer. But teleporting such a far distance left Luna nearly powerless after doing so in a relatively short amount of time. Which tells me that, if she'd have had the choice, she'd probably have taken a shuttle down instead to preserve her strength. Plus, taking a shuttle down to Canterlot would've UNDOUBTEDLY have made for a bigger and better show than teleporting! Let's be honest, at that point in time, Luna was really trying to showoff to Celestia and what could've been better than landing in a spaceship?!

This tells me that they still haven't been able to develop (or rather test, technically) powerful enough engines to escape a planet's gravity well. So, no, I don't think we'll be seeing any shuttles or drop pods anytime soon since we still haven't seen them yet. Which would mean that the Republic will still be largely isolated with little travel between nations.

Of course, if we see such shuttles appear, I'll be the first to admit that your idea has some plausibility.

Good point. But, I thought the Orion was nearly completed before it got blown to pieces. Surely, they have blueprints for the main components to escape the atmosphere. Then again, those stuff ain't cheap. You're right, at this point we still don't know if the Lunarians have small crafts to use. Guess we'll see how the story goes. Maybe your theory could work if those shuttles and small craft weren't built.

Yeah, of course Luna has to do some boasting, gotta get the upper hand if you wanna win the sister supreme!

Anyway, nice talking to you. Cheers!

Regarding shuttles and such, Luna did mention shuttles early in the first story, when they were talking about how to get between the moon and Equuis. And in the first chapter of this story:

"The Orion is a much larger craft, meant for travel across farther distances of space to worlds like Equuis; when it arrives at its destination, it will remain in orbit while the shuttles will be used to transport ponies from it down to the surface."

And on the subject of finances, as Evil himself has given me permission to say:

The money is more designed for the future Lunarians to interact with Equuis in a way that won't cause issues for them in the future.

Until next time...
Anon e Mouse Jr.

Oh crap this book came out. I didn’t realize.

yeah, these are longer chapters than normal.

So the teleport jump started the magic flow, correcting it without them realizing .

Ha! That whole part with the teleportation device was in response to our earlier discussion on economics, wasn't it? Heheheh!

Still, interesting to see that my prediction of Rainbow Dash hiding some likely mental trauma is playing out. Can't wait to see where that goes.

As for Scootaloo getting off the ground, I get the feeling that it's a combination of several different factors. Maybe her passing through the teleportation aether, along with some kind of bacteria she had on her wings/feathers/body, and the moon's lighter gravity are playing a role in grounding Scootaloo?

Either way, this was a great little chapter that I really enjoyed!


Either way, this was a great little chapter that I really enjoyed!

I think this is one of our longest chapters to date! :derpytongue2:

Thanks for the kind words and you might be onto smoething for Scoots; though we're not saying what it is just yet.

There were several nods, before she continued. "Second, I need to remind those of you with unicorn or alicorn magic that we do have our alert system up; it's designed to detect instances of strong magic, especially unfamiliar spells or surges from ponies whose magical signatures aren't registered as regular users of such magics.

Oh good, that's still there :eeyup:

"It's what anypony would have done," Rainbow Dash said, smiling. "

No, no it isn't :twilightsmile:

"And Twilight Velvet is waiting for you outside, dear niece, so be prepared."

Cadance had a strained smile on her face. "Of course," she said.

Oh you'll be fine :trollestia:

Celestia nodded. "One's still in the frozen north, and the other far to the south," she said. "I'd love to do something more permanent about both of them sooner, but..." she sighed.

Can't be sure, but I think Celestia is talking about Sombra and Chrysalis :trixieshiftleft:

"I didn't actually have to do anything," Luna said with a chuckle. "She was born here naturally, just like Twilight was. That alone solved her main problem - with the Republic being so much smaller than Equestria, she didn't have her friend move away, which meant she didn't develop the psychosis that so many of her Others did as a result. She works in the State Department."

Ahh, Starlight Glimmer :moustache:

"As it happens, she still wound up becoming a soldier, but it was by her choice and for our Guard instead of one of our enemies. She's one of Cadance's agents now."

Neat :eeyup:

Though of all of us there, only you and myself will know it. Milky Way, Extra Seconds and Trojan are also aware of her identity, but you know how they are about showing themselves."

Wonder who Extra Seconds is? :moustache:

and Milky Way and Extra Seconds hold Time and Space.

Well, that answered that :eeyup:

Celestia couldn't help but agree. Although... "The question is, would handing over my Mantle also cost me my Champion status?" she asked. "Order personally entrusted me with those Duties, and... and I hesitate to step back from something so important, especially since I can't imagine Discord stepping down from being our Champion of Chaos."

Oh yeah, Celestia and Discord often ended up as the Champions of Order and Chaos respectively didn't they :moustache:

Maybe she could ask Princess Celestia about the mirror portal too at some point, and what she'd seen on the other side.

The mirror portal itself is also something you two can research to see if it's possible to create something similar or at the very least get some ideas :eeyup:

And then she gasped in shock, her wings almost freezing up as she realized she was slowly rising off the ground and actually hovering for the first time in her life.

.......huh :applejackunsure:

"Well... I got teleported from my home to Canterlot, and then up here," Scootaloo said.

Could that have done it. :trixieshiftright:
I mean she didn't have any obvious physical issues so it was likely that her problem was magical in nature, could the long range teleportation powered by two Alicorns have been enough to correct the issue, or is it something else? :trixieshiftleft:

"And from what you wrote about Rainbow Dash, I'm sure she'd be willing to help as well," Snap Shutter said with Rainbow Dash looking nervous for a second.

I suspect that Rainbow might still have some issues getting of the ground, whether those issues are mental or physical I don't know :pinkiesad2:

And Dash, there is a meeting tonight; I do think it will do you good to attend."

Ahhh, that kind of meeting, so Rainbow is likely to still have some psychological issues to resolve, not exactly suprising all things considered :pinkiesad2:

im going to assume that she cant fly due to lack of power to overcome equis's gravity field, and that the gravity on the moon, being generated is just slightly less than equis, to the point that scoots can overcome their artificial gravity


Wonder who Extra Seconds is? :moustache:

Well, that answered that :eeyup:

Indeed. We mentioned him briefly in the first story too, though didn't specify in that scene that he was Lord of Time:

There was no point in wondering anymore; whatever was going to happen was going to happen and she knew she couldn't appeal to Extra Seconds to extend this moment out or even to rewind time for her.

Until next time...
Anon e Mouse Jr.

Scoots can hover now! Huzzah! Maybe the teleportation gave her wing some sort of a magic growth because teleportation is magic. Well friendship is too, but that's not the point.

Sometimes I shudder when I hear teleportation because it reminds me of Blink(it's a good story, I recommend it).

Great story as usual, keep it up!

It's alive! IT'S ALIVE!! I can not express just how happy I am that you are still writing this story!! So much wonderful potential plot development and subtle hints. As I expected, there were still untapped layers to the avengers 'order' to be explored. Can't wait to see where you take this next!!

How the fuck did i not know about this sequel? <.<
Also, why is it not marked as the sequel on the right there?

Yes, in your description, thankfully.
I would not have noticed this otherwise i am afraid <.<
I thought the right side bar of fimfiction had a header for Sequel.

"So was I," Cadance said, rotating one wing with a faint wince on her face. "What's worse is that I have reason to believe it was done to throw a massive amount of their lesser followers forward in an attempt to trick us into thinking that we got them all. In all reality, I believe that the true leaders of their group are going to change tactics and go for much more subtle attacks from now on."

Most likely yes :trixieshiftleft:

Velvet leaned forwards, eager to hear the gossip. "Tell me more," she said with a grin.


As we lack a national registry for them, which won't happen again,

Sorry I need this part clarified.

Does this mean that there is going to be a national registry... like the avengers wanted, and probably still want :twilightoops:

Or am I misunderstanding?

Blueblood frowned at the thought; he knew he could not fail the Grand Master by being discovered and putting the order at risk. He was not the Archivist for nothing, though and he had already made moves to get in touch with the Quartermaster who might be able to help him. The earth pony was one of miraculous skills, resources and contacts, even with being ostracized by their family.

So we now know the titles of three high ranking members.

Grand Master - Name: Unknown
Race: Unknown
Goal: Unknown
Occupation: Unknown
Status: Unknown.

Quartermaster - Name: Unknown
Race: Earth Pony
Goal: Unknown
Occupation: Noble? (likely)
Status: Unknown.

Archivist - Name: Blueblood
Race: Unicorn
Goal: Usurping the Equestrian Throne
Occupation: Ex-Noble
Status: Detained (scheming to escape).

We also know that at least Blueblood sees the avengers as Crusaders, and it's likely that the remaining members do too, so that's fun :trixieshiftleft:

Whether he actually believes in the cause or just sees them as a means to achieve his own goals remains to be seen :trixieshiftleft:

I think they mean a national registry of all police members, which considering all the... shenanigans that have happened, is probably a good idea. Essentially ensure that membership of it can't just be concealed via document destruction so easily.

Flash has proven himself that he is quite the strategist and knows his way around his department. I hope his subordinates are as competent as he is(that is if the putschists somehow missed some information to destroy), gotta find some hard evidence to sentence Blueblood to either exile or execution for high treason and for involvement of staging a coup.

Ayy, an update!

That blasted accord had hamstrung Equestria to the point where they were treated little more than a semi-independent duchy instead of one of the largest and richest nations of Equuis. She longed to see what those accords fully entailed but of course, her and any Equestrian getting their hooves on a copy would be seen as a direct violation of said accords and allow the League to summon the entirety of its forces to invade. That point had been made clear countless times before when she and her fellow representatives had been ordered out of the chamber room when matters of the accords came up. 

This is just makes me suspicious, not to mention it's extremely disrespectful... that said these "accords" don't involve the Republic so it's not impossible that Luna can get more information on them :trixieshiftleft:

what even is this league of nation thing and why are they jerks?

Without going into too much depth or spoilers, the League of Nations was in the international reaction to how Luna and her followers left Equestria a thousand years ago, being the successors of the Council of Creatures of that era. If you do some research on our own League of Nations, you can get somewhat of a mindset of this group and why they act as they do.

Straight then saw that this Applejack was either the world's worst lier or the world's best actress.

Usually it's the former :moustache:

Glad to see this is not dead


It's a day late but it's here like I said.

Blueblood couldn’t believe she had actually been so foolish as to actually leave Equestria and take Cadance with her, but Celestia had actually done so. All the claimants to the throne were absent at the moment and if it were not for the fact that Celestia had thoroughly disinherited him from all of his rightful stations and belongings, he would be sitting on that golden throne right now

He has a point ....

I wonder who the Grand Master is ... and are they (knowingly or unknowingly) working for Discord?

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