Ad Infinitum
“It’s over, Chrysalis,” snapped Cadance as she strode into the throne room. Heart save them, Chrysalis had gotten far too close to getting into the castle undetected, and only a last-minute scan had given them warning. It was enough, though. Barely.
A hole-bored hoof waved slightly in greeting as the monstrous queen lounged across the hoofrests of the throne - her throne, dammit - but she didn’t even look at her, like Cadance wasn’t even worth the effort. Like the castle was already hers.
Damn her to Tartarus.
Well, she hadn’t become Princess without learning how to keep at least some of her composure, though it was rapidly waning. She slammed the door shut behind her, so hard it swung open again but she couldn’t bring herself to care. In a few minutes, it wouldn’t matter anyway. “The guards are on their way. Your little diversion couldn’t keep them tied up for long.”
The changeling on the throne purred, finally fixing Cadance with her alien gaze. “I’m surprised, truly I am. I’d expected a faster response, but your husband truly hasn’t changed a bit. He’s far too trusting of supposed ‘new recruits’.”
“You,” Cadance all but growled as she stalked up to the throne, wings trembling with anything but fear. “Don’t have the right to speak of my husband. Not after that threat to Flurry Heart.”
Queen Chrysalis laughed, running a hoof through her stringy mane. “And you are far too sentimental to be worthy of a throne. Don’t fret, I’ll make sure your precious prince improves for the better. If anything, I’ll make certain that everything is more efficient.”
Cadance gasped, halfway up the dais, her hoofsteps faltering. The room tilted for a moment, blurring in and out of focus before shifting upright again. As a few tear-blurred Chrysalis’s swam in Cadance’s vision, a few tingling stabs of pain began creeping up her hooves.
She looked down, stomping her hooves to try to shake off the sensation, but it persisted, bringing with it an uncomfortable numbness. Her wings ached like she’d slept on them wrong, and she flared them out to try to hide her discomfort.
“You really think you’ll fool them? Everypony is on high alert thanks to your little stunt. I doubt you’ll remain undetected until supper, and that’s being pretty generous with my estimations.” Her wings were starting to sting, but instead of giving in she lifted her head to face her nemesis.
Queen Chrysalis, for her part, had propped herself up on one hoofrest. The faintest flicker of discomfort flitted across her expression, but it was gone in an instant. “It’s only a matter of time before I succeed. I will prevail, Cadance, and my children will prosper because of it.”
“Are you sure about that? You don’t know the meaning of being a mother,” snarled the Princess, fighting through the stabbing sensation as it inched towards her heart. “You’ve never loved anypony like I love my daughter and husband, and my citizens won’t be fooled for a second without it.”
“Love?” Chrysalis spat, resting her head on one hoof. “Don’t make me laugh. Your empire is in love with the idea of love, the idea of a Crystal Princess. They don’t care about you, so long as somepony vaguely pastel is on the throne. You’re not even one of them. You’re a figurehead. And your family? Well, Flurry’s as much of my child as she is yours, and Shining might as well have-”
Cadance’s hoof smacked against Chrysalis’s face, the agony only slightly dulled by the thin downy fur on the changeling’s cheek. “Flurry is my daughter, and you have no right-”
“I have every right!” Chrysalis’s amethyst eyes flashed with rage before she settled back against the seat. “I’ve had hundreds of children, and I’ll have hundreds more by the time your little alicorn filly is old enough to forget the weak, pathetic ruler you used to be. She’s special, of course, and I promise to treat her like one of my own. Same with your husband. Perhaps I might even make a proper Captain of the Guard out of him.”
“You’re… you…” Princess Cadance toppled to the floor as the piercing pain intensified. “You… you poisoned…”
The queen flicked a strand of curly mane out of her face. “Don’t be ridiculous. You’re far more useful to me alive than dead. If it helps any, it feels like you’ve actually managed to bruise me this time. Didn’t think a creature like you had it in you.”
Cadance did her best not to writhe on the floor. Her horn burned as she tried to form some sort of coherent response, but her vision was clouding over again. “A creature… like me? What are you-”
“I know what you’re afraid of,” the mare on the throne said softly, almost tenderly. “You don’t want to lose your child. Sure, she’s a hoofful and you’ve lost many a night’s sleep with worry, but you love her all the same.”
“I… I love-” She blinked owlishly up at the other, and the black and green and pink and violet was too much and too bright all at once, so she shut her eyes again.
Queen Cadance gave her a thoughtful hum. “Trust me, I understand. I’ve lost children. Hundreds of them died as we fought to survive, hundreds more shattered completely when the shield you and your precious husband cast impacted their tender chitin. But still, Flurry lives. Your child, as much as mine.”
“No.” The creature on the ground trembled, the burn in her hooves starting to cool, at first comforting and then nothing but numbness and a slight pressure. A familiar pressure? She didn’t dare open her eyes. “My child, mine. My kingdom, and my husband, and-”
“I love my children, even when they’ve betrayed me. I love Flurry Heart. I swear on my throne, she was never truly in harm’s way earlier, but even if you’d doubted that, you still had to risk everything to get her to safety.” A quiet buzz from the direction of the throne faded into a near-silent rustle. “It’s what I would have done. Now, Shining on the other hoof...”
Princess Chrysalis dared to squint up at the alicorn on the throne. Her throne. “Don’t you dare lay a hoof on him. I-”
Something was wrong. Wrong with her mouth, in the way her teeth cut into her tongue when she spoke. Wrong with her body, with the lack of feedback she felt against her wings, only the faintest whisper of wind against them as they twitched. But worst of all, something was wrong inside her. Something was missing. Something important.
Cadance brushed one of her wings against her as she shivered on the floor. “You were going to say you love him, or something to that effect, right?”
“What did you do to me?”
“The same thing you’ve done to me, and I to you in retaliation, I’m certain. I can’t quite remember, it’s been so long.”
Chrysalis raised a hoof to wipe the threat of a tear from her eye, but paused as she caught sight of it. “This can’t be right. I’m not a changeling. I’m not some heartless creature like you, I’m-”
“You’re a mother who’s lost it all,” said the Princess softly. “A ruler without a throne. A Queen without the blind admiration of your kind. I’ve been there, trust me, but it’s time for justice to be served, and I’m taking Shining Armor and Flurry Heart back.”
“No, I’m the Princess of Love, and they’ll know you replaced me. You can’t do this, you’re-”
“A monster? Oh, please. Listen to yourself.” Cadance’s horn lit as she levitated the bejewled tiara from Chrysalis’s head before carefully replacing it with the crooked crown that befit her. “I don’t quite know when we began this charade, but in a few hours I know I’ll forget all the pain you’ve given me, and I’ll get to rest with my daughter and husband.”
The changeling recoiled, stumbling to her hooves. Each word stabbed like a knife in her heart. “But I don’t have your memories! I won’t forget this, I-”
“You will, of course, just like me.” The alicorn lifted herself from the throne and stretched out her wings, each primary glinting like a newborn’s. “The only reason I remembered is because I wrote it all down, and I burnt that record. If you choose to hold on to whatever truth you make of this mess, I recommend tree stumps. They’re quite the flammable companion.”
Chrysalis wobbled and glared her most intimidating glare at the Princess who took everything she loved from her. “You’re lying. This is some sort of horrible trick. I would’ve recorded it too if it had actually happened.”
Suddenly, the pink alicorn was an inch from her face, her gaze cold as crystal. “Would you have? I doubt that very much, because you didn’t.” Cadance smirked, the light returning to her eyes. “Who knows? I might make some sort of record of it. I’ll be the better you, because I’ll be prepared to stop you. If you want my advice, little bug, I’d forget this ever happened. I hear your lost children might be able to reform you with the power of love and friendsh-”
“How many times?”
The Princess blinked. “Beg your pardon?”
Chrysalis’s breath tasted of copper. “How many times have we done this? How many times has Shining Armor lost his wife? Or the Crystal Empire lost its Princess, or Flurry lost her mother?”
Cadance shrugged. “Funny thing, I don’t think they ever really have. It’s my life, as much as yours. As far as I can guess, we could’ve been doing this since the wedding. Maybe earlier. Does it matter?”
The changeling slumped as she turned to a window. “I think it does, or it did at one point. I don’t want to lose my life, Cadance. I don’t think either of us should forget.”
A faint staccato of hoofbeats rumbled a few floors away. Faster than the changeling could blink, Cadance lept towards the throne room doors…
… and quietly closed them, her horn lighting to keep them shut, her expression unreadable.
Chrysalis felt a tiny burst of hope. “Look, this won’t be fair to Flurry when she grows up. I know my husband is a bit, shall we say, unobservant, but there’s no way she won’t figure out something’s suspicious.”
The alicorn laughed hollowly. “She won’t if this is the last time.”
“If either of us forget, it might as well be!” A flash of shadow soared across one of the windows, and Chrysalis shied away from them. “You’ve been in my place. Even when my memory goes, writing it down won’t stop me from facing the consequences one of us earned, and we’ll be back to doing this without the other’s support.”
Cadance cocked her head, her stare never leaving the door. “What do you propose?”
“I don’t know.” Chrysalis bit her lip, almost hard enough to bleed. “I don’t know, there isn’t a perfect solution that doesn’t make one of us suffer forever, but I do think we can’t do it alone. Please, if nothing else, remember what happened. Write it down. Maybe we can tell somepony, and-”
A persistent knock sounded at the door, and Cadance pressed herself against it as though she were holding up the castle with it. “And what then? Any faith anypony had in you, or me, or whoever originally was the Princess will vanish in an instant! We can’t exactly raise Flurry Heart with two possible mothers who’ve both lost their memory.”
“But she’s our daughter. Ours. And we’ve got hundreds of other children who deserve a mother, too.” Quieter, she added “And we’d do anything for Flurry Heart. If nothing else, we’ll work through whatever happens for her.”
Cadance turned back to give the changeling a feeble smirk, almost perfectly hiding the tears welling up in her eyes. “Feeling like reforming? Is the horrible monster finally seeing the magic of friendship? Gonna burst into song?”
Chrysalis looked down at her hooves, fluttered her paper-thin wings, then sighed. “I’m not sure it’ll be that easy. Somehow, I don’t think I’d be happy about it when I forget about everything in a few hours, but maybe we’ll heal in time.”
The alicorn rolled her eyes. “We? I’ll be fine by suppertime, regardless of what we decide.”
“It is our choice, though. Yours as much as mine.” Chrysalis raised her volume slightly to be heard over the desperate pounding on the throne room doors. “Please, help me, Cadance.”
For a split second, Cadance’s magic wavered, and it was only her panicked alicorn strength that kept the door from knocking her off her hooves. “Help you? That’s a new one.”
“Maybe I’ll be a better you, while you’ll be a better me.” She tried to flash a smile at the Princess, but the fangs made it rather difficult. “I’ll do it better if I’ve got you on my side. Help me pick Flurry Heart, when I want revenge. Help me pick my child- our children- when I’m hurting, and I promise I’ll do the same, because I know how hard it is to be a ruler of an empire who doesn’t love you for you… and I know how hard it can be to be a mother who has to fight for who she loves.”
Cadance sighed and closed her eyes, resting her head against the door as the muffled shouts continued. “You say that, now, but it’ll be a very different story when all you’ve got to trust that this happened is my word.”
“You came for Flurry Heart,” Chrysalis replied simply. “All you had was a note scratched on wood, and yet you couldn’t stop fighting for her. I love her as best as I can right now, and if you didn’t let her go, I won’t either. Besides, we’re in this together, aren’t we?”
A hint of a smile teased the corners of Cadance’s lips. “As far as I know, we always have been.”
The relative quiet stretched on for a few more seconds before a thought struck Chrysalis. “You said I was more useful to you alive than dead. Why?”
“Because I don’t know who deserves to be the changeling, and a part of me’s afraid this was all my doing.” She slowly opened her eyes, her stare distant. “I don’t think either of us likes to think that we’re the villain, else you probably would have had me killed when we last switched places.”
Chrysalis wavered where she stood. “I’d like to think that I never considered it, but we are as similar as different ponies can be. I hope we’ll be stronger together than apart.”
“We’ll have to be.” The Princess stepped back until she was side-by-side with the changeling Queen. “Last chance, Chrysalis,” she said quietly, her horn sparking with the effort of keeping the doors shut. “Last chance to back out.”
“Together,” said Chrysalis, bracing herself as best as she could. “We’ll deal with this together.”
The doors slammed open, so loud they drowned out the words both mares whispered.
For Flurry.
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A truly fascinating portrayal of these two. Two sides of the same coin, for love in all its beauty and horror cannot be adequately embodied in a single being. And coins flip...
I was skeptical at first, but the longer this went, the better it got. Rather appropriate given the subject matter. Thank you for it.
10615313
I'm very glad you gave it that chance, and enjoyed it in the end! It's something pretty different but I had fun writing it, and I'm grateful that you liked it.
this is an incredibly unique story. I am torn it is very good but also kind of confusing.
Now this is a very interesting concept, I really wish to see a continuation of this story.
10615357
I appreciate it! I'm not quite sure where a continuation would go, but if people were interested i might be willing to figure something out.
10615356
I'm glad you felt it was unique! What about it did you find confusing?
Very good story!
Thanks so much again Silent!
I really admire how well you executed the winding, twisting narrative here. From the prose to the imagery, from the dialogue to the wonderfully imparted themes, everything was so well conveyed and came together flawlessly
Every time I read a story of yours, I'm always struck by your imagination and creativity, and this is no exception. No matter what genre or characters your turn your hand to, I always come away having loved what you've written, so keep on with the amazing work because you inspire me and bring me joy too! <3
10615363
just the chrysalis is cadence and vice versa part
10615363
you should totally make a sequel.
I must say this feels like a setup for something more, but I have no idea how it may go.
I’m confused, are they two entities who swap places or the same person with split personality?
this is so brilliant that I do not have words for it... if I understand this correctly they are both in some kind of time loop with them switching places at the end of each loop... they could have been going at this for centuries as far as they know! or if im mistaken then they simply switch places after each battle? doesnt matter as either way this is a brilliant idea that I would dearly love see taken farther with a sequel...
So this is not some sort of time loop? Still, an amusing idea indeed. Does this also mean Cadance can command the hive if she really want to?
The motherly love had been double!
I'm lost
10616298
I've no idea where you got the split personality thing from, but your first understanding of the fic is correct.
10616573
I'm sorry.
10616409
It's not a time loop, but they are switching places after each battle of this sort.
10616486
See previous statement, and yes, I bet she could. She's got at least the same amount of right to command the Changelings as whichever pony is currently Chrysalis does.
10616417
thank u for ur contribution
10616598
It's not your problem, the fic is cool
10616598
I was thinking it was a Fight Club type hallucination/split personality.
My own personal theory is that the real Cadance is trapped in an alternate bubble universe where she ultimately controls everything in Equestria, but she actually doesn't do it consciously, and this is the good and bad sides of her fighting for control in a way that makes sense to her warped mind (because it exists in 6th dimensional space where everything is more complex, even her thoughts) so like this is the manifestation of that similar to the dog ending of Silent Hill 2 except instead of a dog it's Cadance (the real Cadance) and if you saw her actions it doesn't make a whole lot of sense but again 6th dimensional thinking (which I can do btw, I studied ancient techniques for years but never mind that lol just know that I'm kinda an expert on this kind of thing) so it's simultaneously simple and complex where she's two beings but also one being, fighting yet agreeing, a contradiction to simple 2D brains but 6D brains can just do that and these two are just astral projections of that struggle lol I hope the guards don't find her because their brains might melt XD
10616700
It'd be interesting, at the very least, but that's not what I'd intended.
10616731
I have... no idea what this is saying but while it's not what I'd written or intended, if my story has made you think a bit, I guess that's all I could ask for.
10616598
ah ok still a brilliant story that truly needs a sequel!
Huh... even after reading comments, I have no idea what's going on in the story
Could someone explain it in 'Layman's Terms,' please
?
10617178
Did you read the fic itself, or just the comments?
Chrysalis and Cadance have been swapping bodies for a very long time. They forget their old memories a few hours afterwards. Both claim Flurry Heart as their daughter, and neither is sure which is the original Chrysalis and which is the original Cadance, but the cycle of fighting and switching can't go on forever.
10617299
I've read the story, yes, but I didn't get it. Then I read the comments, but it was still confusing. I thought there was some deeper meaning behind all this that I missed...
Anyway, thanks for explaining
,
10617322
You aren't the only one, not by far. I'm at a loss at what to do. If I spell things out in a fic, people think there's a deeper meaning, but if I do something with a deeper meaning, people complain that I didn't spell things out.
10617327
My suggestion is to always do whatever YOU think is right - if someone won't get it... that's what the comment section is for
.
Judging by the number of upvotes, most people here understood it right, so the problem was probably on my side of the fence anyway
. Don't beat yourself over it 
Horror if you give into back and forth they go though. Who is who now? Then again, might be good for them. I like this story a lot.
I am so confused.
10617327
I am biased, but it is fine as it is and isn't ambiguous. I think making it more obvious would undermine the storytelling and the transitional state that underpins the relationship between Chrysalis and Cadence here. If you added a note in the author's notes would that be able to clarify for the confused?
10617327
If it helps, I got it!
Y'know, I think this is the only way I could see that popular triad happening.
Interesting if a bit confusing but still very good. I suppose that after so long they have basically become one identity at this point. Both are one in the same
A bit confusing, but good nonetheless.
10619388
10618474
10617886
I'm sorry you're all confused. What can I do to explain things better in the future?
10619515
When making a story like this I think it just comes with the territory. Unless you make a a completely separate story explaining how they first changed positions and the explanation each one after. Which would ruin a lot of what made this one so interesting.
Maybe the transformation descriptions of the two could have been a bit clearer but then you’d run the risk of this fic getting too wording. I think it’s fine how it is
10619515
Maybe have a flashback?
This was a very interesting story and reading it was one heck of a rollercoaster. It initially seemed like the expected scene: Cadence and Chrysalis facing off against each other, each with their own motives. However, once 'Cadence' started feeling pain and the names subtly switched, I started to suspect that they were switching identities (clear enough here). Yet, upon reading even further, I could no longer identify which was originally Chrysalis and which was originally Cadence; any attempt to dwell on this and ascertain which is which inevitably leaves me confused.
On that note, I've seen quite a few comments where people expressed being confused and apologies from the author regarding this. Yet, I feel that such was not necessary because you should be confused, at least in some respect. The characters themselves are unaware of who was who before they started switching repeatedly in a cycle, so there's no way that the reader is going to know this. The overall situation, though, should be quite clear, as it has been heavily inferred through their conversation (if not explicitly stated) what they have been doing.
I like how at the end, they have essentially come to the decision to break the never-ending cycle for the ones they love. I'm not sure how a follow-up to this story would be implemented (I have the creativity of a rock when it comes to writing) but if we do get a sequel to this, I will be intrigued to see what happens.
I don't know why, but this seems like it could easily work as a poem.
Wow, that was certainly something.
I'm sure without the cover art I wouldn't have been able to understand it.
And luckily you made a comment earlier to explain everything (10617299).
But in the end they both decided to break the cycle? Together?
Good story!
I enjoyed reading it.
Well played an amazing story with a very interesting idea behind it. Was a bit confusing at the start but once I understood what was happening it was a Rollercoaster ride of heart strings being plucked and me just feeling pity for the two stuck in this endless cycle and hoping they can find a way to come to terms and end it
Wow. That really crept up on the reader, starting as a bile-soaked feud between the two that, though within their character, already stunned from how vicious and barbed it was. And then, the moment where a name was first swapped hit, and it getting getting weirder, to its benefit. It's interesting to note the majority of the comments are confusion/debates over what "happened", but to me, the confused parts were supposed to be as such, as the broad notion of them having swapped so many times neither knows which they began as, that was clear enough. Anything else is just details that don't "matter" to the core emotional experience. So, don't fret for leaving things unexplained – it benefitted the piece tenfold. That people wanted to know only shows how great it was, to get them that intrigued.
The final decisions and emotions, of the pair choosing to break the loop for those they love, really put a barbed yet beautiful capstone on this rollercoaster of emotions. The piece's start does remain a bit ordinary and lacklustre compared to what follows, but it is essential to the fic and passes pretty quick, so that's more a bug then a feature.
Rating: Really Good
I very much enjoyed that. If you're interested, I wrote a little review for my blog. Have a fave. :)