• Published 28th Aug 2018
  • 10,996 Views, 3,830 Comments

Twilight Gets a Puppy, Season 2 - TDR

Chaos, bad dating advice, Apples, and more shipping. All in season 2 of TGaP

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The Return of Har-meow-ny, prologue

Twilight Gets a Puppy How come I never get a puppy? I always wanted a puppy, maybe one of those giant mastiff things or a little teacup poodle that I could carry around in a coffee cup.
Season 2 Sit down, shut up, and hold on, cause it's a long ride yet!
By TDR By that annoying gray rabbit.

The Return of Har-meow-ny
To be honest I can't even poke fun at this title, it's hilarious.

Celestia's journal, entry ….. one of these days I'm going to look at a calendar before I start writing.

It's been a year since I sent Twilight Sparkle Sparklebutt Mcpurple flank and her brothers Woofy poofington the third and spicy burrito breath the purperler to Ponyville to try and save my sister. Ole emo Moon butt. Seriously some ponies have a goth phase, little Looney IS a goth phase. A task they succeeded in with the help of a group of friends Yes friends... a needy little wanna be noble, a hick farmer who's probably so inbred that a little heat would make her toast, an partiholic, a sex crazed head trauma victim of a pegasus, and a mousy little pony who screams at her own shadow. So fierce and dependable of friends there. they gathered there.

While they managed to save my sister, By the stars I can't stand emos with their beady little eyes and their dopy hair and their stupid beaks and walking around like dinosaurs... no wait that's an emu... I can't stand emus. it seems part of the cost was that the Sparkle's no longer trust me. Thus proving they are smarter than they look. Which still isn't saying much.

While I am saddened Yes, you are very sad but you shouldn't be sad, because sad backwards is das, and das not good. by this, the return of my sister Luna Moon butt ….. no, that seems like a cheap knock off of another joke. Hmmm I need a name for her. makes this a cost I am willing to pay, Drama queen much ? particularly since I have the time to regain the cost.

Time which seems to be of short supply as of late. Says the immortal, HAH! While the Gala this year was the most entertaining it has been in some time, Pffft you mean EVER. And trust me I’ve
been to all of them, not by choice, this one was the best one yet, and I didn't even have to do anything! it seems it drew the attention of one I thought I had more time to prepare for. Awww she thought she could prepare for me. Like it's hard to throw a welcome back party …. sheesh.

The Sparkle's trust in me has not fully recovered I should totally fix that... or make it worse... where's a coin when I need it? and while Luna has forgiven me, Because you wouldn't stop whining..... I am working on repairing our relationship as well as it still seems strained. Big surprise, after an upper cut like that.

That may not happen as Discord has awakened. And what a long nap it was. Seriously I just lay down for a moment and suddenly a few thousand years fly past.

The chimeric monster handsome devil has likely already has some sort of foul plot only after taco night against me and my sister, Mostly you as I said before I don't like emos.... emus.....whatever likely in revenge for our sealing him in stone. Oh no no no no no..... YES,YOU MADE ME A STATUE!! Do you have any idea how boring that was? And I had such an itch on my nose......

When we used the Elements Glowy rocks against him, Discord had already crossed the line and had harmed numerous ponies. ONE PONY, and he deserved it...... The other Gods Prudes agreed to the act as it was not just Equestria Considering the one who wanted me to learn about new age rock was the god that moved the freaking sun, they wern't gonna argue. that was suffering from the chaos he was inflicting on the world.

Despite what we might have been in the past, You broke up with me sun butt. Not my fault you lost your sense of humor. Luna and I used the Elements of Harmony on Discord and turned him into a statue that I have kept in my gardens to watch over him Laugh at. and ensure he doesn't escape. You mean to rub your plot against when you're feeling lonely, or just mean. Seriously, I was as rock hard as I could get already and that just wasn't fair......

I was not expecting the level of chaos at the gala this year Such a magical time and thus with that influx it seems he was able to free himself. I actually could have freed myself years ago I just fell asleep for real for a bit and only woke up when some pony started singing 'Rock thee like a hurricane', I think it was Luna.

I am unsure where he is In your vault, rewriting your memoirs at the moment. but it's only a matter of time before he shows up. Only a matter of chapters you mean... and it's not many.......

PS: My name is Princess Celestia and I have a huge butt and I smell and the worst mistake ever was breaking up with Discord because he's such a handsome and charming devil and I really want to make it up to him but now I’m to fat and he'd never want anything to do with me again boo hoo hoo. Also I need to remember to make a ruling to ban Emos... Emus... no more emus......Cassowarys have to go to... penguins are okay because they are very well dressed.

Though on the subject of puppies I never got..... I think I know a way to fix that.... after all, if sun butt and moony have found new toys....it's only fair I break them so they have to play with me again...... BWAAAAHA HA HA HA HA HA mine is an evil laugh!

Author's Note:

And so it begins

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