• Published 28th Aug 2018
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Twilight Gets a Puppy, Season 2 - TDR

Chaos, bad dating advice, Apples, and more shipping. All in season 2 of TGaP

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The Return of Har-meow-ny, Part 1

Twilight Gets a Puppy
Season 2

The Return of Har-meow-ny
Part 1

[Canterlot Castle]

“Excuse me, Princess Luna, Princess Cadence.” A gold armored guard called out, stopping the two alicorns as they came out of Cadence's room.” I have a message from Princess Celestia. She wants you both to come to the castle war room immediately.”

“We have a war room?” Cadence blinked.

“Not a proper one.” Luna scoffed. “It's a glorified broom closet magically expanded to a near proper size. It has a foal's map on a card table in the middle of it. Tia refuses to let us get one of the interactive maps as she claims we would just use it to play X-pony UFO guard.”

Cadence raised an eyebrow.

“She is not entirely incorrect, but a junior high school map of Equss that shows Equestria as the biggest land mass is less than useless.” Luna grumbled.

The guard escorted them down the hall to a small door near the throne room before opening it for the two of them. Inside was a collection of mops and brooms and a old stool with a rather lewd magazine next to it that the janitor swore he only read for the articles.

Luna rolled her eyes and stepped back, closing the door again.

“It really is a broom closet.” Cadence blinked as Luna's horn glowed, the light framing the door a moment.

Opening the door again Luna stepped through into a much larger room without any windows or other doors. Cadence blinked looking around the sparse room seeing a number of file cabinets and the aforementioned card table with a map draped over it that took up a pathetically small part of the center of the room. On one wall however there was a very large weapon rack with a sizable number of weapons.

Spears, swords, an odd curved double bladed sword with a blue wrapped handle that seemed to flicker with blue fire as Luna was reflected in the dark metal, and of course the massive steel battle ax, Dr. Choppy. And on the wall next to Dr. Choppy was his diploma from Canterlot U.

Cadence tried not to think about that too much.

The main thing in the room however was a massive oak chest, one that was open and empty. Near it were a trio of guards as well as the guard's blacksmith all standing and milling around a large golden armored figure.

“Pull tighter on that strap lad, I kanna connect it over here.” the earth pony blacksmith, Black Smith, yelled.

“I'm trying you old codger, but it's not …. THERE!” the guard yelled as he managed to fasten the strap. As one the group all moved away from the armored figure, all of them earth ponies and all of them looking like they had just run a marathon or had been lifting weights for a few days straight.

Luna frowned at the sight of the armor, though Cadence had to marvel at it.

It was all gold and ornate regalia, Cadence could feel the power radiating from the metal, the effect making the air around the figure seem to ripple with heat from the amount of magic poured into it. The armor was designed to look like a bird of some kind and after a looking at it a moment Cadence realized it was based off a phoenix. It was breathtaking and worrying at the same time.

Luna was less than impressed.

“Oh we see now. Thou couldn't save Mr. Choppy, nor our old regalia,or our armor, or even our comfortable throne, but thou could save that stars awful eyesore.” Luna grumbled.

“I needed something in case you came back and wanted to destroy me....” Celestia admitted.” Besides your old armor looked more like fetish wear anyway. It barely covered anything.”

“It allowed us mobility.........” Luna snapped.” As for using that against us, when we found thee, thee were in a bathrobe with a half eaten chocolate cake on thine face.” Luna snarked.

“It was a gift... some pony thought I would be cold.” Celestia argued, breathing in to start shouting back at Luna.

“Why do you have that out any way auntie?” Cadence asked cutting off further bickering between the two.

“Because..... Celestia began only for a loud ping to fill the air and the sound of something bouncing around the room.

The Guards, blacksmith, and Princesses all perked up their ears as they looked around following the sounds of impact until with a last thud, whatever it was landed in front of the ash furred Black Smith.

The earth pony bent down scooping up the object and looked it over, his eyes going wide as he realized it was a snapped golden bolt.

The sound of more creaking filled the room a second before Black Smith dropped the bolt and rushed to the door.

“Every pony for themselves, she's gonna blow!!” the blacksmith screamed.

The Guards took off like a shot, the lot of them throwing themselves out the door as the sound of tearing metal filled the room.

With a sound like hailstones striking a tin roof, bolts and straps of the gold armor gave out and shot around the room, bouncing off the stone walls, the weapons, and the shield Luna raised around herself and Cadence. The bits of metal acted like a claymore destroying the table and the map as well as the weapons rack and most of the weapons on it. Dr Choppy, the odd double sword, and Dr. Choppy's diploma however were somehow spared the carnage.

After what seemed like several minutes of bouncing metal the room again quieted down and Luna dropped her shield.

The trio looked around at the plethora of golden bolts screws and clasps scattered around the floor.

“Seems thou hast put on some weight, dear sister.” Luna deadpanned with a level expression.

“Nonsense I simply needed to stretch a little, the armor feels much less tight now.....” Celestia claimed lifting one hoof.

The sudden crash of metal echoed through the room as all of the armor fell off the solar princess with a horrendous crash to the floor. Only a few bits of armor remained, the helm on her head, the hoof guards and a large section of the rear armor that seemed to be stuck wrapped around her rump.

Cadence and Luna stared a moment before Luna let out a snort of amusement that turned into a chuckle, that turned into doubled over laugh, before it became a hysterical cackling as the lunar princess collapsed on the floor her wings clutching her sides as her legs kicked in the air.

Celestia glared down at her younger sister and then to Cadence who was hiding her own smirk behind a wing covering her face.

“Perhaps I could stand to lose a little weight.” Celestia grumbled.

“Auntie what is this even about?” Cadence asked, ignoring Luna as she looked at the pile of gold armor on the ground. “ Why are you even trying to wear armor.”

“There's a reason for that.” Celestia sighed, also ignoring Luna. “ Discord has escaped.”

The laughter suddenly stopped as Luna sat up wiping tears from her eyes.

“Truly?” She questioned.

“Yes, I’ve already encountered one of his pranks and a warning... I think.” Celestia explained having given up on trying to make sense of what Discord said.

“ Ughh... we shall have the maids hide the good silverware. And so help us Tia if he messes with our Neightendo save files we are killing him this time, council be damned.” Luna grumbled.

“ Is he dangerous?” Cadence questioned.

“Yes.” said Celestia.

“No.” replied Luna.

Cadence blinked as the two glared at each other.

“Luna he can alter the fabric of reality to do whatever he wants to any one he wants.” Celestia frowned

“And he uses said powers for pranks and laughs. He is an annoying pain, little more.” Luna grumbled.

“ He made ponies his playthings and treated them like puppets!” Celestia protested.

“Having been an actual puppet for over a century the fifteen minutes it takes Discord to get bored with pranking some pony barely counts.” Luna growled.

“Why are you defending him!?”

“Because we have seen much worse and do not even consider him a threat.” Luna said darkly. “ Besides, he is likely just thine problem again.”

Celestia frowned. “ If you care so little why did you help me seal him away to begin with?”

“Context please.” Cadence stated.

“My sister dated Discord. Things were well for a time though he has 'limit' issues and she dumped him. He did not get the memo.” Luna explained.” As to why we helped thou seal him away Tia, his existence was causing havoc with the Oneiroi at the time. He also was highly annoying to ourselves and our subjects with his attempts to rewoo you with his chaos. In truth we expected the Element's to perhaps balance him out a bit, not turn him into a rock.”

“Yes well, they do what they want it seems, I attempted the same with you and you were banished.” Celestia sighed. “But now that he is free he will most likely be seeking revenge for his time in stone.”

“ Ugh... that puts a bit of a damper on things.” Luna grumbled.

“So you were going to fight him?” Cadence asked.

“Would be an exercise in futility. He is chaos, one cannot fight something like that effectively with brute force.” Luna considered. “ Well one could, but it would not be pretty.”

“So basically you'd have to get the Elements together to use again him if he starts causing trouble.” Cadence offered.

“Tis not an option sadly.” Luna sighed.

“The Elements of Harmony no longer work for us. Luna lost her connection when..... that happened, and I lost my connection when I banished her and broke our harmony.” Celestia added.

“Yes, well. Neither of you are the bearers now though right?” Cadence pointed out.

Luna and Celestia looked at their niece then to each other.

[ Ponyville]

“So where did you want to get lunch today?” Spike asked.

“Maybe that new Cavallo place over off Cobblestone. Rarity says it's pretty good.” Twilight added.

“Woof.” Rahs added.

“Dunno they might have griffon dishes, why thinking of asking that new trainer of yours out?” Spike grinned up at Rahs before ducking the swat the Moon Dog took at him.

The fight was ended when all three of them stopped dead as an unexpected shiver ran along their spines.

“What?” Spike stammered.

“Please Tell me that didn't mean anything.” Twilight muttered.

Spike was about to reply when his eyes widened and his cheeks puffed out. Suddenly he lifted his head and belched green fire, a scroll with the royal seal forming in the air then landing in the dirt before them.

“Uh oh.” Spike offered.

“Let's pretend we didn't see it and keep walking.”

Twilight lifted the scroll in her magic opening it and reading over it with a frown before she let out a long sigh.

“You guys go get me some Alfredo or something nice from the menu as carry out. I'll go get the girls and we'll meet at the Library.” Twilight grumbled.

Author's Note:

Not bad.. second place on the feature box.... rare to see any non clop up that high.

Ooh Never mind. Twilight Gets a Puppy has beat the spread. It's above all the clop!

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