And so ends Fragmented. I hope you all enjoyed reading this as much as I did writing it.

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2016491 I am confused of the message you are trying to send...

Oh no. Creativity's in control.

2016600 I wouldn't say in control, more like has just a bit more influence. For now.
Also, I see the potential for a squeal. One does not put things like there if they weren't at least considering the possibility of one. It might not happen but that's probably why those things are there, just in case.

I see three things occuring in the future:

1. Creativity has gained a small bit more of influence, not enough to do any harm persay, but enough to make her eyes flash yellow occasionally when she's thinking creatively.

2. Logic made either a backup of herself or like Creativity's remnants, still is a remnant on said capture device.

3. Rarity eventually falls for Spike

This was awesome, but can there be a sequel where some of the ponies start to have these weird half-memory dreams only to find out it's true or something?

2017977

O yeah..... nothing special I would assume seeing as she doesn't remember anything that happened. Back to undercover work again I would assume.

And the exiled royal guard, seeing as they won't remember why they banished him; I wonder what they will do.

2017998

But then it would cause mass hysteria because everyone would start thinking there was some sort of conspiracy.

A couple interesting facts though I wonder about is how deaths were explained to their loved ones and rather or not Steadfast still has the insta-kill thing inside him.

I wonder if Pinkie will remember though she does have access to the story via fimfiction afterall.

And if Logic made Rarity more prone to fall for Spike as a going away present persay.

Spike went to Logic… I mean Twilight’s work desk..

That should probably be,

Logic... er, Twilight's

Using "I" makes the narrator a present character. Not sure what the literary term for it is, but it distracts from the narrative, and it happened right at the end, too! Another moment that was jarring was the end sentence:

...they didn't see what had happened on Twilight's work desk with the capture device, as it faintly flashed green.

I would just say what the capture device did, rather than saying, "what happened with the capture device." It's redundant to say something happened to it followed by saying what happened. Also, using the phrase "happened with" is very unspecific. Nothing happened with it: it did something.

Criticisms aside, I enjoyed the final chapter tremendously, and am naturally upset that it's over. It was nothing like reaching the end of “First Week of Winter” or “Of Maids and Mistresses,” but it was still a great fanfic that I wish had been given at least one more chapter. You should have warned us there were only two left, damn you!

As soon as Shining said, “Death” I wanted to fcking punch that bastard to hard. Sadistic asshole much? You kinda made him out to be a jerk who jumps to conclusions and lets his emotions dictate all of his decisions, which I suppose is close to canon, but this Shining seems to believe that sins are completely unforgivable with no exceptions. I hate people like that. And poor Steadfast; nothing good happened to him. He didn't even get laid! If you ask me, his experience should guarantee that he would be one of the country's most loyal and trustworthy soldiers.

I was also hoping that at the last possible minute there would be some quick Lust-on-Spike action, but oh well. Curiosity's pack-rat moment gave me a pretty good laugh, though. And as a Spike fan, I loved the scene he shared with Logic, and the responsibility he was given, right before the spell was cast. The moment she gave him that notebook was...shall I say it...memorable. Fragmented, by Spike the Dragon. That really made me grin.

Thanks for writing this.

These feels! They bring death upon me. The moment with Spike hit me like a ton of bricks since I love him so much and Steadfast continues to be one of my favorite characters.

Typo alert!

“Private Steadfast, you are hereby stripped of Equestrian citizenship and your guard ranking.

Red letter needs to be added.

“Private Breeze is being treated for minor injuries sustained doing Anger’s raid on the Castle.

Don't you mean during?

“Lust, the mere fact that you are here, apologizing and feeling sorry for your actions, proves you are no monster.

Red word needs to be added.

Well… thanks again Princess, for the letting me apologize.

If I may say so, the bold word should go.

“She told us the day we started this place she’d have to leave one eventually.”

Again, if I may say so, the bold word should go.

“Hey Morry, we get it.

Again, the red word needs to be added.

“All I know is that Logic says it’ll reconnect the fragments to Twilight and repair her.”

Again, the red word needs to be added.

I believe best that you are there, to be her shoulder to cry on.”

I think that should be edited, but I'm not sure how.

My opinion of this chapter: Logic has firmly cemented one fact in my mind; she is one heck of a Determinator! I mean, she knew that she would have to die in order to rebuild Twilight, but she kept going, no matter how badly she was injured working to capture the other fragments.

However, I can't help but wonder what Trixie was thinking between the time she was taken to the hospital and the time the memory spell hit.

Also, those feels!

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And I see you left us with a Sequel Hook! I hope this means you'll write a sequel...as in soon.

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2018551 I'm glad you enjoyed it, though I do apologize for no Lust-on-Spike. As for Shining Armor, I don't think of him as a sadistic asshole, I mean come on it's treason. Given that he's fiercely loyal to Celestia (not to mention she's now his Aunt-in-law) it's only nature that he'd want the ponies responsible brought to justice. And considering Creativity was killed, the only one left was Steadfast so he got all the anger.

2018022>>2017977>>2017333>>2017811>>2019206 While a squeal isn't entirely out of the question, it may be a bit before it appears. I'd have to really pin down where the story was headed and avoid basically writing the same thing twice. So don't lose hope, but don't expect it soon.

2017998 Memories are a hard thing to kill

2018022 To ease your wondering:
1. You're talking about the slavers that were killed right? If so, then know that Logic created fake memories of them dying of different reasons over the past four months to cover up any loose ends.
2. The insta-kill is no longer on Steadfast, it lost its power with Creativity's death. Interesting fact: because it wasn't deactivated normally, under the right light you can still see its outline burned into Steadfast's neck.
3. It's Pinkie Pie, so who knows?
4. Logic may or may not have given Rarity a slight inkling. Nothing too major or Rarity might think something's up. Though she may start paying more attention to Spike from now on.

2022814

So I was right on pretty much? Woohoo

2022814 Thanks for confirming that there will, indeed, be a sequel, but would you care to answer my question about what Trixie was thinking about until the memory spell hit?

Also, have you fixed those typos yet?

2022982 I have fixed the typos. As to what Trixie was thinking about before the spell, well she was still in the hospital recovering so most likely she would have been thinking of a way to repay Logic for saving her from Anger.

A good tale. Riddled with grammatical and spelling errors, and Logic used a contraction once ("its" instead of "it is" to be exact, about halfway through the tale), but the errors weren't so catastrophic as to take away from a good story. Thumbs up from me, I liked it.

Three people know the truth: Spike, Pinkie if she wished it, and Derpy the Omniscient, who keeps her own council. Luna I suppose could intuit it through Spike's dreams if she investigated it, which could move it to Celestia and the guard commander, who likes to get drunk... A secret shared is a secret shattered, as they say.

Though one thing that bugged me the whole tale was that Logic could logically deduce that she was a fictional character (which I love when done well, like one character in the Dragon Emperor dreamworld stories), but at the same time she could not reconcile Pinkie's powers. As a fictional account, fantastic abilities should be fine.

2120485 If you find any errors like that please inform me of their locations, I'd really like to fix them.

As for the thing about Logic and Pinkie Pie, the reason Logic freaks out is because despite knowing she's a fictional character, she also knows that all universes have their laws of physics, which science tells us can never really be broken (usually). All the ponies in this particular universe follow those laws except for Pinkie Pie, who makes up her own. This break of the established laws of the universe is what causes Logic to cringe at Pinkie Pie for most of the story.

2122270
Your story's good, but I got a huge backlog, re-reading won't happen for a bit. When I eventually re-read it I'll go through with a fine-tooth comb, just for you.

2128591 Thanks, that's very nice of you

Epic tale . What ever happened to Steadfast and Indigo? Since the traitorous act technically never happened and Indigo now both has unexplainable wounds and an emotional connection to Twi (if I understood Logic's plan). Also what ever happened to the Charity and Logic/Creativity still being technically still alive?

Other than those questions it was a good tale. I'd love to see a sequal where everything gets tied up/ Logic and Creativity come back from Twi's mind.

2313266 Unfortunately, Logic's spell was only a partial mind wipe. To avoid having ponies suspicious on why chunks of their memories were missing, Logic's spell overwrite memories. The spell replaced the fragments with fake ponies in the memories of those who encountered them.

So in other words, most events still happened, it's just that fake ponies took the place of the fragments. So Steadfast is still banished and Indigo can explain her wounds (the connection with Twi was probably erased)

As for the Charity, it's still alive and running. In fact, Hat Trick and Pickpocket made a small cameo in my current story: Of Princesses and Changelings.

Finally, I don't really want to talk about the Logic/Creativity bit, that part shall remain ambiguous unless a sequel comes out.

Cool. I hope there's a sequal to this some day.

2022814

How's the sequel ideas coming along? I'm going to be re-reading this later. Such a good story.

3372827 Yeah... I'm well aware. It was my first one and I wasn't that great at looking through my chapters. I've gotten better now (I hope).

3514788 I've got an idea, still molding it a bit to see how it'll play out. That's about it though.

3595427

If it's anywhere near as amazing as this, then it'll be great after you get done molding your idea. Good Luck and I eagerly await to see what you come up with next.

3595427
From where you left off, you could easily make a sequel, but thats all up to you. would ove to see a sequel though.
Hazza!

Great story, have a fave! You've certainly earned it!

Not a bad story, I liked it, too bad in the end they forgot all... Until Celestia find that her mind was magically altered and remember it...

aw man that ending, it saddens me

Totally great story!!
Absolutly loved it!

And I don't say something like this very often.

It's sad that this story with such obvious sequel hooks, never got a sequel.