“Oh come on! How was I supposed to know that those Wonderbolt tickets Deceit bribed me with were fake?”
Oh, Dashie, you and your silly, often hilarious, lapses in judgement. That line made me laugh more than all the other humor in this chapter put together.
And it looks like Spike's hopes of being with Rarity are smashed in yet another fanfic. Due to the pony who takes care of him no less. This is why I don't necessarily approve of the TwilightxRarity ship. It's more painful than a kick to the dragonballs.
'are' should be capitalised for the intended emphasis. As it is, the emphasis is on 'you', meaning she sounds more confused about who is what, rather than what pinkie is.
So, with the new mature rating, is this going to turn into a full clopfic? If so, please sustain the story fully and don't renounce it for the sex. It's a really good story. Glad I tracked
1020540 Don't count Spike out just yet. Remember that Logic doesn't have natural emotions like love so anything between her and Rarity is a one-sided plane crash waiting to happen (Good for Spike, bad for Rarity).
1022806 You know I think you're right about that part, it would sound better and point more emphasis on Logic's confusion about Pinkie Pie. As for the mature rating don't worry; that's only because Anger's a foul-mouth and Logic did just kill quite a few creatures (Also I plan for Creativity to become very drastic). The main storyline will always be about Logic and the Elements versus the other fragments and Creativity's scheming.
1023670 Ah, that's good to hear, I just got worried when I needed to confirm that I was of the legal age to view mature material in my country, haha. It would have been really weird for this to suddenly turn into clop. Although, on that note, seeing Lust would still be funny.
I love what you're doing with Creativity. Twilight's creativity is held back by her morals, just as in real life progress can often not be made in Science due to ethics. An unrestrained Creativity will ignore all ethics and morals, focusing purely on progress. I love that you've recognised this.
you mean you intend to have explicit clop scenes??
if not, nothing you do can make it mature rating. even discussing adult themes in the story (even at length) or having heavy innuendo and profanity still make it teen rating only. honestly, I don't want this story to be dragged down by an unnecessary mature tag. people won't read it.
Oh, Dashie, you and your silly, often hilarious, lapses in judgement. That line made me laugh more than all the other humor in this chapter put together.
And it looks like Spike's hopes of being with Rarity are smashed in yet another fanfic. Due to the pony who takes care of him no less. This is why I don't necessarily approve of the TwilightxRarity ship. It's more painful than a kick to the dragonballs.
“What are YOU?!!” Logic exclaimed. Pinkie smiled.
'are' should be capitalised for the intended emphasis. As it is, the emphasis is on 'you', meaning she sounds more confused about who is what, rather than what pinkie is.
So, with the new mature rating, is this going to turn into a full clopfic? If so, please sustain the story fully and don't renounce it for the sex. It's a really good story. Glad I tracked
1020540 Don't count Spike out just yet. Remember that Logic doesn't have natural emotions like love so anything between her and Rarity is a one-sided plane crash waiting to happen (Good for Spike, bad for Rarity).
1022806 You know I think you're right about that part, it would sound better and point more emphasis on Logic's confusion about Pinkie Pie. As for the mature rating don't worry; that's only because Anger's a foul-mouth and Logic did just kill quite a few creatures (Also I plan for Creativity to become very drastic). The main storyline will always be about Logic and the Elements versus the other fragments and Creativity's scheming.
1023670 Ah, that's good to hear, I just got worried when I needed to confirm that I was of the legal age to view mature material in my country, haha. It would have been really weird for this to suddenly turn into clop. Although, on that note, seeing Lust would still be funny.
I love what you're doing with Creativity. Twilight's creativity is held back by her morals, just as in real life progress can often not be made in Science due to ethics. An unrestrained Creativity will ignore all ethics and morals, focusing purely on progress. I love that you've recognised this.
1023670 Bad for Rarity? Well that's no good either!
1023670
this does NOT merit a mature rating; teen is plenty. Trust me on this one
1031446 Oh just you wait, I plan on making it worthy of that rating You know I actually don't know if that's a good or bad thing
1031546
you mean you intend to have explicit clop scenes??
if not, nothing you do can make it mature rating. even discussing adult themes in the story (even at length) or having heavy innuendo and profanity still make it teen rating only. honestly, I don't want this story to be dragged down by an unnecessary mature tag. people
won't read it.
tl;dr: no clop = teen rating only.
I can't help but think of Logic as Spock. I wonder, does that make Creativity Kirk?
Mission - Rush