- Member Since 31st Dec, 2013
- offline last seen 2 hours ago
Necrogen Lord
Crossovers and Sci-Fi are my bread and butter.
Necrogen Lord
Joined 31st Dec, 2013 ·
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I love jojo
And don't forget the maniless and FABULOUS POSES!
So an edit to the first chapter then?
7872899
Edit to the whole story, actually. Restarting everything right now.
7872919
I see, well it's early on enough that I don't mind.
I've never seen Jojo's Bizarre Adventure. Can I have a summary?
Also, liking the story. It reminds me of that game, with the girl who had a twin brother that died and now follows her as a spirit, keeping her safe and stuff. I forget what it's called, but it's a good game.
7882886
Beyond: Two Souls. And JoJo is SOOOO much better. There's a moment where he punches a shark with his Stand (that's what they're called by the way, not spirits or ghosts, they're Stands).
Basically, people's fighting spirits manifest into a Stand that can only be seen by those who have the potential to have or already have a Stand. Stands have various forms and uses such as ropes, guns, smoke and sand or they can by manifested in a fighting spirit form. Those ones are the strongest but have the shortest range (usually). They can block any damage coming towards their user (the main character's Stand in Part 3 (Stardust Crusaders( which introduced Stands)) caught a bullet fired from a magnum less than a foot away from his head) but can be damaged by other Stands, and that damage is reflected onto the user.
Basically, if you have a Stand, you can only be hurt by other Stands, and you can only see one if you have one.
I hope there will be explenation about powers, because I haven't watch Jojo something.
This story is very well done so far, but I'm not surprised it hasn't reached 100 likes yet, many stories have a similar start.
I do like it however as it brought a familiarity I haven't felt for a long time.
It is very similar to other HiE stories but yet, so different.
Giving that his Stand has a clock on its hands, he can manipulate time or overclock himself (i know) that everything else around him seems to move slow.
Yare yare daze
Well shit....what is going to happen to the elements?
what's his Stand name and power? is it like ZA WARUDO or more like Crazy Diamond?
Unexpected.
I LOVE IT!
MAKE MORE!
love it best story 10/10
WAMUU!!!!
You have my attention and endorsement, but I will be extremely disappointed if someone doesn't get beaten down with a thousand fists in the span of a few moments.
Also:
*spittake* Oh shit!
good job
Whats a stand?
7930628
Manifestation of one's soul and mental prowess. Not everyone has the capability to harness both, so only the ones capable of having one can see them (or they can be gotten through other means, such as inheriting a fraction of someone's soul or through strange artifacts. No, they are NOT magic).
7930628
Most are unique in their own method of having powers, such as being made of sand, turning into a giant boat, existing only in dreams, there's one that's literally just a gun, plant vines, a fly, while specific types share similarities like fighting-types that have strong, fast punches, but little range (like the main character's [Stand]). There's one in Jojo where the user died and it's [Stand] used the corpse to fertilize a plant which it possessed.
7930400
Yeah, that was about my reaction to that name.
I like it so far but theres a few problems i feel i need to point out. The first is that he feels a bit Garry Stewey but im not quite shure yet. The second is that i hardly know anything about this guy and im 5 chapters in...I have all these questions like was Celley a good mother growing up?,what was the orphanage like?,Whats with the rivalry between him and twi?,and most importantly how in the sam hell did he learn to use his stand?
Was it from celestia? Another stand user? Is he self taught? I HAVE SO MANY QUESTIONS MAN!
Other than that the fight scenes are good and the conversations flow well even if they are a bit dry at times. All in all i have to say for some random HIE i got to say this is high quality for what it is especaly when you only have 2 or 3 story's worth of experience under youre belt.
So i hope to see more of this and i hope my nitpicking has helped in some way!
Good luck and stand proud
Do not forget that [Stands] can be also be named through musical references or by symbolic means. Also one can perceive or receive [Stands] if they are spiritually enlightened,( though the clarity of which may vary), through birth, mystical objects of high spirtual worth, or of a desperate personal need as well.
So I bet Zecora, for instance would be able to see a [Stand], though weather or not she could have remains to be seen. Regardless [Stand] users tend attract [Stand] users. Hopefully no one made any meteor carved arrows or stone masks in the distant past. Unless you plan on using Princess Amore shattered Crystalized remains as a Holy Corpse Parts substitute. Sombra did scatter her remains in far across the country, in Fiendship is Magic #1. That could work in making more [Stands]. The other option is the Tree of Mark of itself. Also Celestia would make a great Hamon user if she was taught it. If Luna [Stand] were ever to evolve it should be the Tantabus. It is a part of her after all.
It seems to me that Platinum Bluetstar is a mixture of Part 2's Joeseph Joestar demeanor, Part 3 DIO's looks and Stand, and the ferocity and coolness of Part 3's Jotaro's Kujo. Plus Part 4's Josuke sincerity.
Is his [The World] based on DIO's, Alternate Diego's, or Over Heaven DIO's? Or an original Mish mash? Hopefully not too similar or over powered. I would like him to be unique enough on his own.
Finally would the Mane 6 gaining their Elements of Harmony cause them to be able to partially see [Stands] now?
cant wait for more :)
So pretty much AU Dio in Equestria.
This is a fantastic story so far. One I'm hyped to keep reading in future updates.
7882886 The game you're thinking of is Beyond: Two Souls. As for a summary of Jojo, well, that's rather difficult. It's separated into 8 parts that, while interconnected, all tell their own stories. You'd probably be better off looking it up online.
Oh no.
i2.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/000/751/135/75c.png
... Alright, gimme a moment to decide which Joseph Joestar line to use here...
Ah, screw it, I'll use 'em all.
OOOH NOOO! OH MY GOOOOOOOOOD! HOOOOOOOOLY SHIIIIIIIIT! SONUVABIIIIIIITCH!
There we go, got it outta my system.
bravo good sir, Can't wait for more! PRAISE THE SUN!
Well come back! Now more or die! First.
Spike is a... Oh, now things keep on getting more interesting around here.
Can't wait to see where we go from here.
The heck's a cassion?
Did you mean carriage? Only other word that is like it is caisson (French, meaning large chest), which wouldn't really fit here. It looks almost sorta right/reasonable, enough so that I'm not sure if it's a typo or a word I have literally never heard or read before. If the later; please enlighten me as to its meaning, I love learning new words.
Edit: Jeez, Twi's a bit of a dumbass here isn't she? Is she in denial because if it works as Platinum says she's not a special enough snowflake to be able to get a Stand? So she insists against all evidence that it's magic or something so it's not literally impossible for her to match him? Twi may also have some latent jealousy issues related to Platinum's Mommylestia.
8105891
It's a roman thing.
Platinum, huh... I should warn you, some people, namely me, might confuse this pony with Princess Platinum.
8107477
He can strut like it and probably wears it better than her.
8106135
Huh, I wasn't sure if it was a typo, it seemed to fit there/no words similar enough in meaning/spelling for it to be a probable typo. Never heard that used before. Some type of Roman chariot you say? Romans aren't my preferred area of reading so it's reasonable that it's an unfamiliar word to me.
Edit: So I looked into(Googled) "Roman cassion, chariot cassion, etc." The only places the words; Roman, chariot, and cassion appear together (in English, lots of French sites with the word cassion) that I found are two listings on ebay for toy chariots. While I'm sure more research could find the meaning, the fact that Google has no clue what it is means it's probably pretty esoteric. Since most readers likely also have no clue what a cassion is, and the information if available is relatively deeply buried/known predominantly by enthusiasts, I would recommend swapping it for chariot.
Or don't; the context makes it clear what you mean by it so it just causes a moment of confusion, doesn't inhibit the plot.
7882886
AAAAAAAAALRIIIIIIIIGHTY THEN! it;s time for a crash course in the History of Jojo!
before we begin you need to know that the events of the different series of jojo's bizarre adventure focus on different members of the Joestar family.
the first series, Phantom Blood, tells the story of Jonathan Joestar, son of the wealthy businessman and scholar George Joestar, and his archnemisis Dio Brando takes place in Victorian britain in the very early 1900's. years before the events of the story, George and his wife and baby jonathan were involved in a carriage accident after picking up a mysterious stone mask found in central america that george was asked to research, that cost the life of georges wife, they were found by Dario brando, Dio's father. believing them to be dead, he tries to loot their bodies, forcing his wife to do so as well, verbally abusing her. however, he soon discovers george is in fact alive, and very grateful, believing dario was trying to save him instead of robbing his corpse.
years pass and Dario's wife dies, most likely cause by dario's abuse, and their son, Dio has grown up hating his father and the life of poverty his actions have forced them in to. Dario at the time was dying of an Illness, and told dio to go to the joestar family, who would help him become a great, rich man.
dio arrives at the joestar estate, with the intent to take their fortune for himself, and starts off a bitter rivalry with Jonathan. years pass, and their rivalry grows more and more. soon, George falls ill. it is in this time that Jonathan discovers a letter written by dario to his father, explaining why he was sending Dio to the estate. upon reading it,. jonathan realizes that Dario's symptoms were identical to Georges.....leading him to suspect that Dio had killed his father, and was trying to kill george as well. confronting dio, jonathan leaves to londons chinatown, where dio purchased the medicine. receiving help from a local street thug, Robert E. O. Speedwagon, he soon discovers the "medicine dealer" that dio purchased the poison from.
meanwhile, Dio had found the stone mask and georges notes, telling how the mask, when coming in contact with blood, would activate and drive multiple claw like spines into the wearers head, into their brain. deciding to use this to kill jonathan, covering it up as jonathan falling victim to a research accident involving the mask. he goes out to test the mask, using it on a drunk. however, instead of killing the man, it turns him into a vampire that almost kills dio, before the rising sun turns him to dust, and making dio come up with another plan, much more sinister.
when dio arrives back at the estate, he's greeted by jonathan, george, and the poliece. feining surrender, he attempts to stab jonathan but george takes the fatal blow. using his blood, dio activates the mask and is transformed into a vampire. he and jonathan battle, and he is seemingly defeated, though it is later revealed that he survived.
joining up with an itallian by the name of Zepelli, who has been hunting the mask and is in possession of a powerful ability known as ripple, which uses the power of the sun to damage vampires, that he begins to train jonathan in, they hunt down dio to put him down for good.
some time after the final confrontation, jonathan marries his childhood sweetheart and the two leave on a ship to honeymoon in america. however, when they get out to sea, they discover something terrible, dio, now a disembodied head, has been snuck on to the ship by one of his last servants and attempts to take jonathans body for himself. the ship bursts into flames, and jonathan makes his wife, and their unborn child, flee while he restrains dio, and the two sink to the bottom of the sea.
flash forward several years to the second series, Battle Tendency, to the middle of WW2. Jonathan's grandson, Joeseph Joestar, is a teen living in america. Speedwagon, who remained a friend of the family, has created a massive corporation spanning the globe, determined to track down any hint of the stone mask to prevent another dio incident. he soon discovers the origin of the mask, a south american temple with a strange pillar inside, depicting a massive man. however, he is soon captured by Nazi's, who are also searching for the stone masks to use against the allies in the war. going to rescue speedwagon, Joeseph arrives just in time to witness the Pillar man, a member of the race of people who created the masks, being freed, and has to stop him from escaping with the aide of a nazi major, who, upon having the pillar man take over his body, manages to resist enough to use a grenade to blow himself up and attempt to kill the pillar man, but not before telling jonathan that the nazi's had discovered 3 more.
leaving to stop them from freeing the others, they arrive too late and the three pillar men slaughter the nazi's. it is then revealed that they evolved along side ancient humans, and were worshipped as gods due to their supernatural powers, but had a weakness to sunlight that turned them to stone until the sun went down again. they developed the stone masks in an attempt to remove this limitation, with the mask dio used being a "failed" attempt. now, they're searching for the final piece needed to complete the true mask, and Joeseph and friends set out to stop them, and succeed after a long, bloody adventure that cost several people their lives.
now, for the part relevant to this story, we flash forward another two generations to seasons 3 and 4, Stardust crusaders and stardust crusaders: battle in egypt, to the life of Jotaro Kujo, grandson of Joeseph. joeseph arrives in japan to help his grandson, who has gotten himself locked up to prevent people from being hurt by an "evil spirit" haunting him. joeseph explains that, what he thinks is an evil spirit is in fact a mutation of the ripple power, called a stand, which is a manefestation of the weilders will and fighting spirit and are at least partially sentient and "Stands by them" protecting them from danger, and it's appearance is due to dio's return, having managed to successfully steal jonathans body years ago, and survive at the bottom of the sea inside his coffin before wreck divers found it. every member of the joestar family has developed a stand, including Holly, Joseph's daughter and Jotaru's mother. however, due to her being too weak for it to fully manifest, holly soon falls deathly ill as her stand leeches more and more of her strength in an attempt to awaken. in order to save her, Jotaru and Joeseph set out to kill dio once and for all, and along with a trusty group of friends, fight their way through dio's army of followers he's granted stand's too.
from the title, it seems the stand being used for this will be Jotaro's Stand, Star Platinum, a short range melee stand of immense physical strength, blinding speed, supernatural perceptive abilities (able to see a tiny fly in a blurry photograph and draw an extremely detailed picture of it), and, at the end of the series, copy Dio's stand the worlds timestop ability.
oddly though, platinum is described as looking a lot like Dio, so i could be mistaken and he could have the world, which has many of star platinums abilities, but is slightly weaker. however, his time stop ability is much stronger than star platinums
yare yare daze.....blueblood's going to be this stories dio..... i can feel it in mah bones
8260265
Oh my god that sounds awesome.
Thank you.
8260317
How can he be Dio if there's already someone with [The World]?
No, Blueblood's not the Blueblood you think you know.
8260900
nono, i didnt actually mean he'd be Dio, i meant he'd be this storie's VERSION of dio, as in the selfish asshole going around ruining everything for everyone for selfish reasons and somehow becoming a massive threat. at least, that's what popped into my head when i read the bit where celestia said both he and Platinum were heirs to the bluestar family, and with Bluebloods stereotypical attitude....well, it just seemed to parallel Dio and Jonathan from Phantom Blood is all.
so, if he's not the one i assume him to be, that means you're making him have a different attitude than normal then?
8260946
I've got a way to change up the entire series' story line with this. Including Blueblood's attitude at the GGG.
Crazy Apple and The Claw huh?
Our heroes are not to be burdened by an expy of the Author's namesake in the future, are they?
That'd be a problem, Kira was only defeated by a combination of sheer dumb luck and possibly a bit of intervention from Fate.
8297985
No. Trying to do something a bit different here.
Damn. I really like where this is going, although I'd like a bit more... Would extrapolation be the correct term here? I don't know, whatever. This is really good in my opinion.
You may ignore the next block of text as I have no idea how to black out text on a phone.
(despite my only experience with writing a story being on hiatus for a few years now) And after spending the last few months obsessing over JoJo, I'd love to see more. I'm currently at part 7 in the manga and I actually enjoy this as much as I enjoy JoJo itself. My only wish is that Platinum should... Mess up a little, maybe? I just kind of want to see how he responds to failure and I have a feeling it'll be a short while before that happens, if at all. Of course, it's your choice as the author whether or not that happens. I also have mixed feelings about him working things out with Luna like that but I can't really complain because she deserves every bit of love she gets...
Anyways, I find your story to be a pretty good read and I hope you continue this Bizarre Adventure. Arrivederci!
-Jrock117
Wheres more
I've seen an analogue of Silver Chariot and Polnareff in one Jojo crossover (I should check my Jojo library if I still have it), but this is the first time I've seen [Star] Platinum. I bet five bits Magician's Red is a griffon.