• Member Since 23rd Jul, 2012
  • offline last seen Aug 9th, 2018


There are only three real monsters: Dracula, Blackula, and Son of Kong.


During this year's Hearth's Warming party at Twilight's castle, Trixie is enjoying lounging by the fire, but the Cutie Mark Crusaders ask to hear a story. So, Trixie decides it's the perfect time to tell them about the time she saved Hearth's Warming.

Thanks to Csquared and ferret for pre-reading and suggestions.

Chapters (1)
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Comments ( 15 )

“Was it because ponies don’t believe in you anymore and your sleigh doesn’t work without the magic of belief?”

He looked at her with a confused expression, replying, “What? No, that’s stupid."


I'd raise a stink about how the Crusaders are still fillies more than six years after Trixie and Starlight became friends, but I'm going to assume Trixie was too drunk to remember how numbers work from the start of the story.

In any case, most entertaining. Thank you for it.

“Was it because ponies don’t believe in you anymore and your sleigh doesn’t work without the magic of belief?”

He looked at her with a confused expression, replying, “What? No, that’s stupid."

Agreed, and impractical. Why would Santa make his sleigh work on belief when he's in Equestria for pony's sake?

Ever since I stopped using pegasus ponies to pull my sleigh—”

“Right, the unions. I remember that.”

Well if he would just pay them a living wage, they wouldn't have protested!

"Fine. So maybe I embellished a tiny bit. The story is mostly true."

The three fillies stared at her accusatorily.

"It’s at least half true."

Their piercing gazes intensified.

"Okay, there are elements of truth to it."

Trixie should look into politics.

“You’re crazy.”

Welcome to alexmagnet's Trixie.

“Sorry about that,” said Starlight Glimmer with an apologetic grin. “This stupid chair wouldn’t turn properly. I was hoping to just sort of... swing around and face you.” 

The next day Starlight invents the swivel office chair.

Hearth’s Warming is all part of the deep-state globalist conspiracy to keep ponies from discovering the truth about Luna’s moonbase where she’s training an army of space slugs to come to Equestria and make us all wage slaves.”

....well obviously!

In fact, you can read all about it on my blog

I have many questions.

“Teleportation spell, go!”

That's not how that works!

Trixie downed the last of her sixth or seventh mug of eggnog

Yeah that sounds about right.

We brought her inside where she downed, like, a gallon of eggnog and then started to tell us what happened.

The Great and Powerful Tipsie!

*sigh* So good to have you back, dood. Your Trixie is practically her own genre. :moustache:

Didn't you know the manacles in the Castle of Friendship's Happy Play Dungeon are reindeer-sized for a reason?

(Darnit, now I need to remember to get this years Hearth's Warming story blog out)

Obviously, the story in which they discovered Santa Hooves in a tense drama about how he used his next 364 days to help Trixie through her drinking problem

[Trixie pours eggnog, attempts to drink it, splashes it across her face.]

Years passed since the pilot episode here in the real world are not the same as years passed in the show. They never will be.

This was amazing and that is all I think I need to say. Favorited.

I can't read about Trixie putting her legs up on an ottoman without picturing her putting her hooves on Suleiman instead of the furniture.
Also I'd love to read Starlight's Infowars blog.

Drunk Trixie is cute.

Dammit i wanted to say and so a villain is born.

I for one would love to hear how Apple cider saved Hearthswarming.

This is stupid. I love it.

I've missed your Trixie, man.

Damn, your Trixie is the most legit Trixie I've ever seen. Also the story is awesome, I haven't finished reading it, because I wanted to comment on this so badly. Good job :D.

Yeah, that sounds about right, both as a story Trixie would tell and as a separate, real sequence of events.

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