7540223 Wait till you get to chapter 2

also, glad to see you've enjoyed the story so far! This is the first clop I've ever written, so I hope it's good!

A glorious read through buddy, nice job on this! Quite the delicious read~

10/10 would read again

;) a solid piece of world, well done.

7541358 Many thanks for the comment! Glad you liked it!

You know what I changed my Mind. I hate infidelity but if this is what it took to get Luna out there again to find Love then fine. Take my like you monster

7545676

I appreciate it a lot, sir. Your comment made my day!

Holy hot goddamn that was gooooooooooooooood.

Very nice work, very nice indeed!

~Skeeter The Lurker

7549538 Well, thank you for both of your comments! I'm glad to hear you enjoyed the story, and I'm happy to see you think I got Luna down pretty well! She was the hardest part of this to write.

Oh, that was a good read. The interplay and the choices made for their love-making are all... yum. You should definitely do more of this kind of fooling around.

A couple of suggestions though.

Be careful to not go "overly-flowery" for the sake of flowery-ness. 'Superfluous size?' 'Mare of jet?' There were a few things like that that just made me groan and chuckle - not what you're looking for when the point is to be erotic.

Also, don't try so hard to avoid referring to a pony's anus. It actually got confusing to sort through her area, her other area, her other-other area, her other-other-other... wait, which one are we on now?

7558802 Glad to see your comment, and I'm happy you enjoyed things! To address your first point, I don't see how 'Superfluous size' is flowery. I was simply stating that Nightmare Moon's stature is large without saying large. As for the sketchy anus-mentioning... I agree, it could use a lot of polishing. I just hate the word Anus... sounds gross.

Thanks again for the criticism, things like this are what writers like coming home from work to! If you care, give my page a follow; I've got a neat story coming up next involving Flurry Heart and Cadance (not a NSFW story, mind you).

7559693

Well, the 'superfluous' thing was mostly because it felt like the word itself didn't fit. It's the same as saying unnecessary, so Nightmare was 'unnecessarily-sized' - which, given the situation, makes her sound not just large, but 'far too large for no good reason.'

As to the anus thing, there are other ways you can refer to it and keep things clear - 'tail hole' comes to mind.

7559778 Tail hole is a good one, thanks for that little tip! I would go back and edit things... but I'd like to focus most of my energy on the new story, which has been pretty slow going so far...

7569697 I'm not too good at narration, that's why I focused my energy on the characters. Glad it shows, and I'm glad you enjoyed things! your comment made me happy; i just got home from having my wisdoms pulled.

Also, I assume the 'lavender unicorn syndrome' is referring to a character by their species and coat color? I didn't know that was a problem...

7569749 Well... is there any way around that? I don't like using the character's name all the time, it just feels too clunky. Once again, I kinda don't see how it's a problem.

Wow this was a very well done bit O work here. Props to you!

7697066 Well, goodness! Thank you! Glad you liked this old story of mine! I'm quite proud of it, I feel Luna's personality was the highlight.

-slow clap and nod of approval- yes...Amazing clop...brilliant! Favorite and now watching

8012357 Wow... thank you so much! That made me really happy! Funny, this is an old story of mine. Thanks again for the follow and fave!

8012433 what can i say? I take a while to strike gold and i have in this regard ^_^ your work is very good, i have some of my own but none of it is finished lol

More adultery let harmony burn the princesses to ash.

While I normally don't ship Cadance with Luna, this was a well done clopfic with a simple, but effective plot.

8193787 Well, thanks! Funny to see you commenting here now, seeing as this story's one of my oldest. I too enjoy this little fic, especially with how sweet the first chapter is.

Glad you liked it!

8193803 Just because a story is old doesn't mean nobody will read it.

Always good to read more luna/ nightmare moon clop

really good fic!

Goddamnit, these two are cute~!

8920418
I'm so glad you think so! Certainly glad you enjoyed this little story of mine!

8921292
You have no idea how much^^ Only thing that might be missing is an epilogue where cadance weds Luna to her new lover or something^^ i'd probablly contract instant diabetis from that^^

As great as this was, I wish there was one with Cadance and Luna ending up as a couple, and remove all points of Cadance being married, or have anything to do with Twilight's brother.

9069071
I'm a stickler for canon, so while I could have done this, and it might have made a better story, I didn't want to go all 'alt-universe' on things.
I'm glad you liked the story, though! It's one of my oldest works and it still stands up, which is cool.
Thanks for commenting and reading! I appreciate it.

9069074
Here's what the authors on this site need to understand though. NOTHING the fandom has ever written is, and ever will be, cannon in anyway to the show.

Too many I feel write as if Hasbro will one day make their ideas cannon.

9092258
Oh, trust me, we all know this. Other people have their own reasons for trying to stick to canon, but I mainly do it because I like to imagine that these little things I write have happened at one point. Of course, there are some exceptions to this, but anything I write "seriously" is written to be sort of what the show already is; a window into this other world.

9092374
Story good.

9409686
Thanks gamer