• Published 27th May 2012
  • 4,938 Views, 148 Comments

Mankind Triumphant - Relic - Dafaddah



Princess Celestia is a disembodied head in a box. Maybe she's gone insane. Or maybe, just maybe, she hasn't. Based on Chatoyance's TCB Brand New Universe Chapter 7: Mankind Triumphant

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AD 2205 - Two weddings, a funeral, some tea, and a filly

Based on The Conversion Bureau: Mankind Triumphant

- Relic -

Chapter Thirteen:
AD 2205 - Two weddings, a funeral, some tea, and a filly

by Dafaddah

Author's note: In the writing of this story I’ve been blessed with the assistance and support of not one but two great editors: Microshazm and SecondLaw. Their participation made this story much better than it otherwise would have been, and for that I am eternally grateful. Of course all remaining errors, bad phrasing and clumsy text are due to my own stubbornness and illusions of projecting my own “voice”. Nevertheless I hope this story will have brought some pleasure to its readers, and maybe even given them a thing or two to think about.


June 2205

The Litton Estate gardens were decked out in celebration. A huge white open-sided Pavillion easily accommodated the several hundred invited guests, and on its sides more tables had been set up so that the entire resident population of the Litton Estate could attend. All eyes were on the two head tables set up on a dais near one side of the tent.

Spoons and hooves began to tinkle on crystal glasses. At first it had been just a few, but momentum built as more people and ponies added their own contribution to the din. Finally, the happy young pony couple could no longer ignore the call, arose and treated their assembled families to a major smooch. Cheers rang all around, turning to laughter, as with eyes closed the couple held the kiss, and held it longer still. They only parted lips when some of the younger members of the audience began whistling a bit too enthusiastically for modesty’s sake.

The groom peered into his bride’s big bright golden eyes, and all the noise and hubbub faded from awareness, leaving room only for Storm, the mare he loved, the filly that drove him crazy almost from the moment they met. And now here she was, a vision of incredible beauty in her wedding dress, an angel, silver highlights in her dress bringing out the light grey of her complexion and wings and illuminating the copper tinted gold of her mane. Conrad Sachs sighed in contentment and they sat down still holding hooves.

Moments later the commotion started again, but this time Conrad and Storm joined in with the noise making. Finally, at the other head table, the second couple married today, two humans in their fifties, rose and gave a briefer but no less passionate kiss that gathered more applause than whistles.

Conrad rose and lifted his glass. The crowd quieted. “A toast: Long life and much happiness, to my new stepmother, and my new uncle!” This last joke was greeted by much laughter, and many cries of “Here-here!”

Wilberforce Sachs stood in turn, glass in hand. “My lovely wife Chloe and I wish the very same to our new daughter, and nephew!” There was more laughter. “And to my future grand-foals, great-nieces and great-nephews.” Several of the attendees stood and applauded.

Conrad’s best-colt nudged him in the ribs. “Hey, doesn’t this mean that you ‘n Storm are kissing cousins now?” Billy grinned.

“Life’s strange Billy,” was Conrad’s only reply. He gazed around the table, an assemblage of human and pony family members. Storm’s parents made a cute pegasi couple: Sasha Litton and Air Heart, like Conrad a subject of HLF conversion. Storm’s grand-parents in their late seventies sat next to them, Loretta and Harvey Litton, one of the very few mixed species couples, even at this wedding. Some things will take longer to change than others, thought Conrad.

Rounding out the table were Sasha’s best-mare, two bridesmares and two bridesmaids, all of whom were fellow residents of Litton Estate. All had become good friends in the four years since the Council of the New Earth had declared the pony residents of the estate full citizens.

At his father’s and new step-mother’s table was a pony of legend: Victoria Spencer. She had never married after becoming a pony and had only recently retired, with her daughter Chloe taking over the reins of Celestia’s businesses. Victoria was the brain behind Celestia’s business empire and for all those years, Loretta Litton had been her very formidable human front. And now both are my grand-mothers in law! thought Conrad, intimidated.

Next to Victoria sat a beautiful young woman whose poise was simply ethereal, Princess Celestia of Equestria. It was odd seeing the head of state of most of the world’s population sharing whispers and jokes with her dearest friend. Conrad still couldn’t believe that some ponies, after regaining their full mental faculties, had insisted on reaffirming old allegiances instead of declaring themselves of Equestrian nationality. Celestia had been adamant that there were only two ways to become Equestrian: be born of Equestrians, or voluntarily declare yourself to be one. She didn’t even require a person to undergo conversion, and therefore there were a number of human citizens of the Equestrian nation.

Others at his parent’s table were like his father: senior officials of the Eastern Alliance. With all the dignitaries attending these weddings there was a significant portion of the world’s leadership collected here today, a real security nightmare. In the last several years, Discord’s HLF had been responsible for a whole series of frightening or simply bizarre attacks on Council institutions. Disruption of the wedding had been Conrad’s frequent nightmare for most of the last year. Thankfully, Celestia herself had provided additional unicorn and pegasi security for the event.

Preparations for these two weddings had dominated the news for months, and inevitably there was significant media representation attempting a modicum of discretion tonight. Conrad sighed. After all, this event could easily be seen as an example of the age old tradition of uniting families to cement a negotiation, in this case the power sharing deal struck by the Council in the days following Celestia’s release. I just wish people weren’t so cynical about it, thought Conrad. The Sachs dynasty, marrying with the Litton-Spencers certainly looked to be just that: a political alliance.

But he knew different. He really loved his Storm, one of the first naturally born Equestrians on Earth since Judgement Day. And he also knew for a fact that the bond between Chloe Litton-Spencer and his father was as wonderful as it was unexpected for them both. Love is like that, thought Conrad as he nudged Billy in turn.

“What was that for?” exclaimed his friend.

“Later, you should ask Twilight Sky for a dance.”

“Conrad, are you for real? She’s like Celestia’s goddaughter. She is so out of my league.”

“Oh yeah? Well Stormy says she told her that she likes you. So buddy you’ve got no excuse not to ask her to dance.” Conrad raised an eyebrow. “Or are you just a big chicken in a pony tux?”

On the other side of Conrad, Storm was whispering to Twilight. Conrad saw the young unicorn mare looking at them out of the corner of her eye.

He turned to Billy. “Dude, she’s checking you out!” Billy gulped and then smiled nervously.

Beneath the table he squeezed Stormy’s hoof twice. Everything was going according to plan!


July 2206

Being immortal had its advantages, but there was a price to pay. For an immortal every relationship had a single inescapable conclusion: grief. As the centuries and the losses accumulated an aversion to closeness set in, and unless checked, would result in a strong drive towards personal isolation. For most of Celestia’s life she had, in part, been protected from this peril by having an immortal companion: her sister Luna. She had only truly understood the loneliness of immortality when she had been forced to banish her sister to the moon. Celestia had always felt in her heart that somehow that episode was due to a failure of her own character as much as it was to that of her sister’s. She wished she had discussed it more with Luna in the short years she had had her back.

She recalled the years of Luna’s banishment, years when the immortal’s dilemma had become her daily reality. Very lonely years when she had buried her heart in work, projects and sometimes even physical isolation. But she had never retreated for too long into herself, and for that she owed thanks to her little ponies. No matter how cold and remote she became, their sense of joy never abandoned them, nor they her. And so she always returned to them, as their happiness became the sunshine of her own existence. In her last few hundred years she had again come to embrace life with her beloved ephemeral companions and celebrated their brief passage through her days. She loved meeting them and seeing them grow in wisdom and experience. She wondered at the power of their love and the scale of their achievements, and she wept at their passage from this world.

So it was that Celestia the immortal had come to cherish her grief. It was the one thing the princess chose to do in private, the one part of her life that she kept for herself. She had spent almost her entire life under watchful eyes, and her present situation was no different.

This is why she was in the New Arlington cemetery, alone. A short distance away a family was gathered around an open grave as a coffin was being slowly lowered into the ground. The majority of mourners were ponies, like with many families these days. After having their faculties restored many ponies tried to return to the relationships they held before forced ponification. In some cases the broken bonds could be mended, but certainly not all. Sometimes the past could not be restored, and ponies were hurt yet again. But even those rejected knew with a certainty that they were not alone, that they were forever and always part of the herd and surrounded by friends. With the support of these friends they were able to form new families. They recovered and the majority even prospered. From her vantage at near the funeral, Celestia observed ponies and humans leaning on each other, united in mourning. The bittersweet sight reminded her of why she was here.

It had been almost one year since the attack that had killed Harvey and Loretta. Two broken souls that somehow Victoria had saved, she who had suffered the most at their hands. Celestia had grown so very fond of them, of Harvey’s steadfast love for his wife, and of Loretta’s constant battle to be a better person than she believed she was inside. Celestia marveled at how Victoria had seen all this, and had the courage to give them the chance to show that they could be more than just an extension of their shameful pasts.

She had brought roses to place before their tombstone. As she set them on the grass another mourner came up behind her. “Hello Celestia,” said a well known voice.

She turned and saw Dexter dressed in a black trench coat, a bouquet of mixed wildflowers clasped in his hands. His eyes widened as he noticed the tracks of tears on her cheeks. “Hello Discord. If you don’t mind this is a private moment.”

“Look Celestia, I...”

“Of all days and of all places, why do you approach me here? Haven’t you done enough?” Celestia surprised herself with the vehemence of her feelings. From the expression on his face it was clear that she had surprised Dexter as well.

“But we didn’t do this, Cely.” He crouched and placed the wildflowers next to her roses. “It wasn’t my people. No matter what the police reported, it wasn’t the HLF. It was some crazy copy-cat group, which the HLF has broken up. They won’t bother us or you again.” He rose to stand next to his sister.

“I came here because I thought you might come alone. I have a question to ask you, Celestia. Why?”

“Dex...“ She winced and started over. “Discord. I have no patience for games today. Why what?”

“Why are you doing this?” asked Discord. “Why incarnate as a human? Why stay on this dingy little planet with these dingy little people who locked you up in a box? What do you owe them?”

Celestia knew that this was probably just the bait for one of Dexter’s elaborate traps. But she realized that she didn’t care. It was a good question, and she felt like answering it honestly, if only for herself. “Because this is what the ponies and people of Earth need: an undeniably human representative for the ponies, a bridge that binds them together. And for those who erred and transgressed, someone to say ‘I forgive you’ and make it possible for ponies and humans to face each other again and live in harmony.”

Discord made a face. “Ugh! Harmony. Couldn't you use another word for just getting along? I'm a creature of chaos after all.” His shy smile had none of the scorn she would have expected from the words. So small a thing, she thought. And yet it means so much to me.

Celestia raised an eyebrow. “You know, this chaos thing is getting boring. Can't you find another outlet for your creativity, like poetry, knitting, or bowling if it makes you happy?”

Discord’s smile grew brighter. “I’ve discovered online communities. These poor sops have yet to see what a real troll can do.” He gripped his chin in one hand and looked at Celestia as if in deep thought. “Forgiveness and spicy banter! You know, exposure to humans has changed you Celestia. And I mean that in a good way.”

Celestia looked at Discord intently. “And what about you, Discord, has the Earth affected you?”

He stood in silence for a moment. “If it hadn’t, I wouldn’t be here.” A look of pain crossed his face. “Back in Equestria, I couldn’t escape the feeling that everything around me was a lie. We were experiments, the ponies were fakes, and Equestria itself was a sham. But when I woke up here, I wasn’t surrounded by lies anymore. I couldn’t change the sunrise, or make it rain chocolate milk, or even make it stop raining!” A sudden smile graced his features. “It was interesting, invigorating, gloriously chaotic, so much more real. I liked it, Cely, it felt... good.” For a moment his expression showed a hint of his usual mischievous glee. “And isn’t it just deliciously ironic that we two battling rogue AIs from another universe teamed up, and defeated the local rogue AI that would have turned this planet into a zoo with no visitors?”

"If I've learned anything in the last eighty years Dexter, it's that the people of Earth are worth fighting for," said Celestia solemnly. "I should have seen that earlier." Her expression softened. "Just like with you."

Discord took a deep breath and his demeanor became contemplative. “Look Celestia, I’m not ready to ‘come-in’ yet, and to be honest, I may never be. But maybe we could talk about it someday.” The shy smile was back.

“Yes we could,” said Celestia. “And thanks!”

“Whatever for?”

“Letting me out of that box. You forced the issue on them, and to be frank the fear of you played a big part in the agreement we reached.”

“Glad that my reputation could be of service!” He nodded his head. “Oh, that reminds me, this is for you.” He took an envelope from his vest pocket and handed it to her. “Just something I discovered in the Lizard’s archives.” He scanned the area around them. “I just got news that we might have company. Gotta run, Cely.” Despite the words he stood hesitating before her.

“Goodbye, Dexter.” She raised a hand to touch his arm, but he ran off before she could complete the motion. She looked on as he disappeared from sight.

Celestia examined the envelope and gingerly opened it. Inside was a single sheet of paper on which was printed segments of two reports.

Document No. EBO-OP28-Vislog-21251025-002.EN
HIGH COMMAND

EQUESTRIAN BARRIER OBSERVATION REPORT
OCTOBER 25, 2125
VISUAL OBSERVATION LOG POST 28

The following summarizes recorded visual images from EBO-OP-28. Each entry is preceded with the observation timestamp.
1500 - 1600Z No change
1602:03.1204 - Hypernuclear ignition flash detected
1602:03.8972 - 1st brightness peak reached - sudden drop in brightness by 62.81%, followed by gradual rise in brightness.
1602:04.3693 - 2nd brightness peak - brightness remained constant
1602:05.6353 - Barrier becomes opaque - brightness reduced to near zero
1602:07.7334 - Barrier begins to shrink - brightness near zero
1602:10.2429 - Barrier shrinking exponentially (rate estimated to constant volume lost per second)
1604:02.5893 - Barrier shrunk below camera resolution (2.4 cm)


The second segment read:


Document No. TEA-PCU1-EvEv-21251111-BC01.EN
ERIS COMMAND

TACTICAL EVALUATION AND ANALYSIS
NOVEMBER 11, 2125
PHYSICS AND COSMOLOGY UNIT 1
EVENT EVALUATION - BARRIER COLLAPSE 01

The following summarizes analysis of recorded visual images from Document No. EBO-OP28-Vislog-21251025-002.EN. ADVISORY: this document contains statements of a theoretical and speculative nature. This document may not be represented as a conclusive determination of the events described, their causes or their significance.

1) Visual evidence of changes in Barrier light emissions show an unexplained 62.81% reduction of brightness at timestamp 1602:03.8972Z. SPECULATION: Uniform nature of reduction over entire Barrier seems indicative of a change in nature of Barrier or imposition of an additional Barrier within the existing Barrier. Nature: perhaps an undisclosed innate defense mechanism established by Equestria. Purpose: no speculation.

2) Disappearance of light emissions at timestamp 1602:05.6353Z. Analysis shows light emissions were not zero, but rather typical of background light emissions from intergalactic space. SPECULATION (HIGH ORDER OF PROBABILITY): The segment of the Equestrian universe converging with our own within the Barrier suddenly shifted to an area of Equestrian intergalactic space. Nature: focal point (location) of convergence in Equestrian space has translated to a different point of Equestrian space, or the planetary surface of Equestria itself has moved. (See related notes on Equestrian cosmology - Movement of Sun and Moon.) Purpose: Agents unknown have moved Equestria out of the convergence zone. This may have been necessary in order to dump the energy of the hypernuclear blasts into open space rather than into Earth space. Why the Equestrians would seek to do this is unknown, as the only potential beneficiaries would be the inhabitants of the Earth.

3) The mechanisms by which the ignition of Hypernuclear explosions would lead to the disappearance of the Barrier are unknown at this time. The (REMAINING TEXT CENSORED.)


Celestia wiped away her tears with the back of her hand. They may have survived! Equestria might have survived! Starswirl’s Filter spell had done its job and protected at least some part of Equestria, because somehow, somepony had moved Equestria itself out of the zone of convergence, something Celestia and Luna had not thought possible. Perhaps it had to do with the magic of the Crystal Heart, linked to the magic of the earth ponies, the deepest and most potent in Equestria. But how, or by whom didn’t matter to Celestia. She carefully folded the sheet of paper and put it in a pocket.

Celestia stood before the grave and read the epitaph Victoria had asked be chiseled in the stone below the names:

It is the smallest hope that inspires the greatest courage

“Goodbye, old friends,” she said to the tombstone before her. She turned and left the cemetery feeling more hopeful than she had for almost an entire century.


July 2206

Celestia was again the girl child of her dreams. She sat with her imaginary sister having tea in the observatory of Canterlot castle.

“How can you be certain that they survived, especially given the provenance of these documents?” Luna asked.

“I cannot. But with these reports I can at the very least hope they did. And of course I had Conrad track down the original documents. There were more corroborating reports, and even some additional attempts at analysis. It all checks out.”

“But it still isn’t proof they survived, only that somehow Equestria or the locus of convergence was moved,” insisted Luna.

“But then there was also that first unexplained reduction of the brightness of the explosion. Granted we are dealing with the intersection of two universes with different physical laws. But the sequence of events is telling. And good enough for me.” Celestia took a large bite out of a huge cookie. These had become her favorites for tea in the observatory.

Luna put down her teacup. “Then you know it is time to try to contact them again. It's been over five years since you finally got out of that box. You’ve grown almost as powerful as you were before that horrid day, yet you haven’t attempted it. Why haven’t you?”

Celestia peered into her own teacup. The reflection showed her pony self, as did all mirrors in this dreamscape. She could easily read the expression on that pale mare’s countenance. “Because Lulu, I am afraid to fail again, and lose the hope that I might not be alone.”

“THOU ART A LIAR, SISTER!” said Luna in the Royal Canterlot voice. She smiled crookedly and in a passable imitation of Applejack’s country pony accent said: “Y’all try that again now, sugarcube.”

Celestia stared at her hands. “Because... I might have to choose between this place and all my little ponies here, and the real Equestria. Oh, Luna, I... I don’t know if I could.”

The illusory dark princess took a sip of her tea. “It seems to me, Cely dear, that you already have.”


August 2206

The little white filly galloped into Princess Luna's parlor in a huff. She saw the princess sitting with a guest in two large armchairs near the windows. “Auntie Woona I can fly, I can fly! Look!" She jumped up into the air and managed to hover for two or three wing-beats before crashing to the carpet into a tiny heap, all hooves and smiles.

"Celestia! You get back to class right this second." A middle aged purple alicorn mare cantered into Luna’s parlor and began to help the foal untangle herself. "I swear that filly is more trouble than a whole flock of dra...” She noticed the strange creature sitting in a chair next to Princess Luna. “...gons. A human!” Twilight approached, her insatiable curiosity had not been blunted by over a century of helping Luna rule Equestria. “I apologize for the interruption. I was...” She stared into those magenta eyes, “... teaching Cely to read.” She swallowed, and approached the pair slowly.

The woman stared back. Twilight noticed her hands shaking. “Hello, Twilight,” she said.

That voice... thought Twilight. In shock, she sat down on her haunches. The woman rose from her seat and knelt before Twilight, putting her arms around her. “Luna tells me you are well, my most faithful student.”

Twilight hugged her back. “I... we... missed you,” was all she could think of to say. For a minute she had no voice other than her tears. She felt a nudge on her foreleg and looked down to see little Cely very unsure about the situation. She wiped the tears from her muzzle with a fetlock.

“Twilight,” said Luna. “Please allow me to introduce Celeste, a princess from a faraway land. But then I think you two already know each other.”

“Oh, yes, where are my manners?” Twilight released the hug and pulled a suddenly very shy looking little white filly up into her forelegs until she was nearly muzzle to nose with the human. “Cely, this is Princess Celeste. Princess, this is my daughter Cely. She is all of five years old.”

The little foal smiled brightly. “Hey! I’m a princess too! An’ so’s my mom! An’ she helps Auntie Woona. An’ she can raise the sun. An’ she’s gonna teach me how when I’m bigger, but now I hafta learn letters an' numbers an' RIFMATIC! An' I’m NOT five years old. Auntie says I'm older'n she is an' she's like a GAGILION years old, but I was big before, an' then a bad thing happened an' I got real small an' I was asleep for a loooooong, long time. An' my birfday is on the day I woke up, but I don't 'member anything before that, an it’s TWO WHOLE MONTHS until my next one! YUCK! An’ your name is almost like mine: Ce-les-tia! Ooh! An’ your eyes are the same color as mine! But you don’t have wings, or a horn. An’... say! What are you?”

“Cely! That’s not polite!” Twilight looked abashed, and a bit proud at the same time. Luna and Celeste laughed.

Princess Celeste smiled at the filly. “I’m a human, sweetheart. And an old friend of your mom and auntie. Can I be your friend too?”

The little mare's eyes stared out from below her stubby horn, then she turned her head and crossed her forelegs. “Nope!” she said.

Princess Celeste looked nonplussed at the sudden refusal. Twilight was blushing in embarrassment.

“What if I say pretty please?” asked Celeste.

“Nuh-uh!” said Cely.

"Pretty please with a great big cherry on top?" suggested the human, showing a toothy smile.

Cely kept her round little muzzle steadfastly in the air and peered at the human out of the corner of her eye. She gestured with a tiny white hoof for her to come even closer, which she did. Cely raised a hoof to Celeste's ear.

In her tiny foal voice she whispered one word.

“Gotcha!”

Comments ( 38 )

I loved every second of it, and really curious to see what, if anything, you do to continue this :twilightsmile::pinkiehappy:

1929084

Thanks! I have a few ideas for additional stories in this setting, most from comments by readers wanting me to explore more of the lives of the characters they particularly liked. I also have a fair amount of the setting I prepared for this that I actually never got to include in the story. And of course, I would be enormously pleased if anyone actually chose to write their own stories using the events in Relic as a setting!

Dafaddah

Yes ! A very good ending indeed.
Did you base Celeste's regeneration on Chatoyance's Code Majeste ?

(Discord trolling the Internet... that won't end well :twilightoops:)

1930208

No, but it is based on the same idea that the substance of Celestia (and Luna) cannot be destroyed. In the MT case, a big chunk of Celstia (minus her head) was left in Equestria. It couldn't die, but neither could it regenerate without reattaching to its head. The isolation in The Treasure Chest prevented that reconnection, which only happened after Discord dissolved it to reclaim his 'substance'. That's also why Cely is just short of six when 'Celeste' visits her.

It just occurred to me that in your universe Alicorns reproduce asexually by clonal fragmentation. The implications of which are disturbing, especially for poor Mi Amore Cadenza. :trollestia:

1931142

Its the age old magical principle demonstrated in the tale of The Sorcerer's Apprentice. Whoever tries to destroy the princesses by explosive means is in for a nasty surprise!

1936070

I was clear that this story is a continuation of Mankind Triumphant, aTCB story which establishes the initial scenario. Both humans and Equestrians inherited a very difficult situation, and both make mistakes in how they respond to these challenges. Even Celestia herself comes to understand that she did some things wrong.

However, the main villain in this story is not human - the Lizard - and I hope you'll read on to see how all the parties become involved in resolving the issues, and especially Celestia's choice. Then I hope you will see that rather than putting down humanity this story is about human survival.

1936070

There is one more element that I hope you will consider.

Sachs' disillusionment at the beginning of this chapter is understandable, but his guilt is over the treatment of Celestia, of which he is a bit of fanboy. He comes back from that funk later on. His, like every generation, has to play the cards it was dealt. Virtue, or the lack of it, depends on how you play your cards. Sachs makes a very important decision as well in the next chapter that requires a lot of courage. Having the courage to face these decisions is what I intended as the core theme of this story. I do hope you'll read on and let me know of your opinion after you've read the whole story.

Regards,
Dafaddah

1939616

I agree, the Celestia in my story is a far more limited being: the Celestia in my story is not a goddess and she knows it. She knows she was created for a purpose, but that purpose was never truly fulfilled. She made Harmony her goal, but the convergence with Mundis presented her with a truly overwhelming situation. And finally, the reward for her charity was a deeply personal violation and the loss of everything she loved. It all nearly drove her crazy, but she recovered, in no little part because of the concern she had for the newfoals being created with her blood, and the chance encounter with Victoria that completely changed her options and influence in the world. This allowed Celestia to re-engage, and after some 50 years become a main economic and political player on the planet.

As to the influence of ponies in this new earth, they will have to learn to use their strengths to their best advantage, and they have lots: they run all agriculture, execute most of the trades, have a longer lifespan in which to build knowledge, wisdom and businesses (most likely cooperatives, because they do that better as well). And finally they do have Celestia, who is much less naive than she was at convergence, and very powerful at the end of the story.

1939616

One more point, very well put by DemonEyesLaharl (in another thread to which the link does not appear to be working!) the basic value of MLP:FIM is friendship. In this story that is what saved not only Celestia, but also Victoria, the Littons, the Sachs in the end, and there is even hope for Discord. I hope you"ll read the concluding chapter and let me know what you think.

Your friend,
Dafaddah

For me, the leaps between the three sections were a little jarring... it took me time to realize where events were taking place, and in the last segment, whether or not the situation was real - had Celestia really returned to Equestria, or was it still a fantasy. I think I personally needed just a little more clarification. Then again, I have been very sleep deprived of late.

Thank you very much for your fine story, and for a very happy ending.

1946868

Thanks for the feedback. I have already modified some of the opening paragraphs to describe the scene more and smooth the transitions. Your advice has helped me improve this story immeasurably!

For the ending I deliberately chose to keep it ambiguous, like the dream sequences with the imaginary Luna. The reader has to make up their own mind whether these sequences represent reality or are just wish fulfillment on Celestia's part. But then I first conceived the structure and plot of this story shortly after I'd read "The Life of Pi", so maybe I'm playing the ambiguity card a bit too strongly! (BTW - the book was incredible, and the movie is one of the few translations of a story from one medium to another where the adaption succeeds on a whole new plane. I heartily recommend both, especially if you're feeling low!)

Regards,

Dafaddah

2124044

Perhaps Celestia was making a joke at her own expense, as is often the case in her conversations with 'Luna'. Also, keep in mind that as one of the diarchs of Equestria, which does use a basically capitalist economy, she was quite rich before her capture. She has a very deep understanding of both the value of money and the use of capital.

"'The quality of a man is made by his enemies,' Maric told me that once. Whether it is a compliment to you or to me is unknown."

- Loghain Mac Tir, Dragon Age: Origins

I personally follow a slightly broader version of that sentiment:
"The quality of a man is not in the cards he was dealt, but in how he plays his hand."
Enemies are only one set of the inputs into what make a man.

Also, check out what Professor Morning Bell has to say on the question of identity.

Dafaddah

Well, I've finished reading this, and I'm glad that you kept one little caveat that Discord's HLF fragmented into another group. Not all is diamonds and roses in this story, but it was a good ending. You've a talent for a fast-paced conspiracy writing. Have these.

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encrypted-tbn3.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcSY_zGvLWGXpfY-hcwG4Om7UL9q4Buo8D-Fib_aqIHiJCeHsxDb

25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lxels9BoVU1qff8too1_r1_400.gif

2127119
Thanks! This was a very dark premise, darker than I would normally consider suitable for FimFiction, but it let me get inside Celestia's head and explore the core of who she really is, something I've wanted to do since I started writing pony fiction.

Thanks for the feedback, and I'll check out some of your stories as well.

Dafaddah

First off, I have no idea why I apparently didn't keep up with the updates since Ch. 10 even though I upvoted; oh well.
But now that I've read the conclusion, I am completely in awe of what you've done with what I considered to be one of the most offensively misanthropic of Chatoyance's New Universe (or w/e it was called) collection. Every side got wonderfully developed, and the backstory you gave Dexter and pals was great.

It's not simply that your story ended joyfully, though I admit that did make me happy. I felt that your interpretation of that world was much more real. Nobody is just cackling evilly while eating babies for breakfast. And now that I've typed that, I want to iterate that although that's a pretty low bar to pass, that doesn't mean I don't think quite highly of your story.
(Note to self: I had to take out 3 interjections of "just" beyond the one I left in. Work on that:facehoof:)

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:twilightblush:

Thanks for the kind words. And I'm glad you liked the treatment of the characters as this was a story about self discovery. That's essentially why I chose the Mankind Triumphant setting in the first place, The darkness of the basic scenario gave me a lot of scope to really get into Celestia's internal life - which is pretty tough for a quasi-immortal being whose portrayal on the show is extremely superficial. The scenario was also so different from other TCB storylines that there was a lot of room for world building, which I do enjoy quite a lot.

Thanks again, and if you have some time take a look at Renaissance Pony, it's still underway, and it deals with a much earlier part of Equestrian history.

VBR/Dafaddah

Now that's how you end a story both humans and ponies heading towards a brighter future one that nether could hope to achieve on their own

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One of my unwritten rules of writing is that if you start with a decapitation then you should end it with a kid saying something really cute.

But thanks for the kind words. This was a story about both individual and collective growth and I'm glad you noticed. :twilightblush:

A very nice story. The original universe description shocked me, but your continued and complemented it perfectly by bringing a happy ending to an otherwise very sad take. I only wish it had been longer! :twilightsmile:

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Thanks for letting know what you think of this story! I'm planning a one-off sequel, but it will be mostly for laughs and a few feels... and there will be some examination on the nature of identity, because that's what Relic is about. :twilightblush:

Well that story had a happy end.
It was however not what I had in mind when I proposed that story suggestion...

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Yeah, I'm a sap for a happy ending... but not always: The Fall of Icarus.

Besides, I already have a sequel planned for Relic, but I want to finish Renaissance Pony first.

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"This last provision is just Celestia and Luna protecting their subjects, which is part of their moral obligation as heads of state."

Actually, it is entirely subject to their personal opinion on what is dangerous to their subjects and what is not. Most things they consider dangerous, aren't. Just saying, the humans don't have a way of knowing they can trust the Princesses' word. Well, not without like, touching the barrier or something foolish like that.

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Whether or not anyone (or anypony) else would agree with them, it nevertheless IS their responsibility and obligation to their subjects to make that call. And as in my head-canon they are not omnipotent nor omniscient, they will get some things right and some things wrong, as Celestia herself admits in her conversations with the 'dream Luna'.

I very much agree with your second point, though. The human leadership have no reason to take Celestia at her word, nor should they. But their ability to get real intelligence - that they can trust - inside the barrier is also close to zero. And with the fate of humanity on the line, they are also bound by their responsibility to their own constituents to take a very cautious view.

This was an interesting read. It was dark, grim and a little depressing. I felt so bad for Celestia.:fluttercry: I loved the ending though, and I'm glad that Celestia got a happy ending in the end, that she didn't have to suffer. take my upvote, but this probably won't be a story I would read again, simply because its kind of depressing. but its still a good story and you are a good author.:twilightsmile:

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Thanks for the feedback, I'm glad you liked it! As you say this story was based on a pretty dark and depressing scenario, but by the same token it gave me an amazing premise for getting inside Princess Celestia' head and explore her psychology and how and why she became the person she is. And despite the dark theme, it has become my second most well-read story.

I'm also glad you liked the ending. I actually had it planned almost since the beginning of writing this story and I feel very happy with how it turned out. :twilightsmile:

4638121 your welcome, i'm going to read your other stories to see what else you got.:twilightsmile: keep up the good work.:pinkiehappy:

Cely probably regenerated from the body of Celestia.

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Or if Wil Wheaten shaved his beard off, with a bit of makeup and some CG we could have him play Cely! We don' have to tell him which part of the original Celestia became Cely. :trollestia:

C'est toi qui a écrit cet superbe histoire? de tout les mondes parallèle au sujet tu Conversion Bureau, celui-ci est mon préféré. Mise à part le optimalvers, je trouvais que l'approche prise pour l'histoire suivais le mieux les étaux de l'avant par Chatoyance, et n'était pas juste une histoire remplie d'action sans substance.

Je te fais chapeau a toi pour cette histoire fantasmatique.:twilightsmile:

C'est genre d'histoire que cette univers met de l'avant, me donne toujours des frisons dans le dos en raison qu'il fait vibrer une corde sensible à l'égare de ma culture québécoise constamment menacé d'être noyer par la culture Américaine, si on ne prend pas guard contre cela.:fluttershyouch:

C'est un très beau travail.

Ben là! J'suis toute gêné! :twilightblush:

..I found it a bit strange how events sometimes timed at 2100+ AD, yet in story text I can see 2018-2020 dates ..typo, I think, or whole timeline was moved 100+ years into future. But yeah, thanks for some celestial psychology.

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The story covers three time frames:
1) just after Celestia’s beheading
2) the events of Victoria’s awakening, and
3) the events of the Lizard’s attempt at recreating the Garden of Eden (sans humanity or ponies)
Each chapter title states the time period of that chapter.

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- Relic -
Chapter nine: AD 2200 part 5 - The Wages of Charity
by Dafaddah
Author's note: Heap Big thanks to both SecondLaw and Microshazm for editing. Use of characters from An Azure Future with the gracious permission of Krass McWriter.
---
“Is this *beep*-ing thing on? Okay, let’s *beep*-ing do this.”
A human torso and face appeared in the video window projected by Conrad’s room AI. It belonged to an athletic looking young man, perhaps in his late teens or early twenties, and in the image he seemed bored. He picked up some papers and read from them.
“Minutes of the board meeting of Intelligent Designs corporation, John Norris reporting, secretary pro tem for this meeting, timestamp.” The screen briefly showed a date: July 28th, 2018.

So, this was date when Lizard-AI was "created" ..... ? Well, then I can guess this IS alt. universe relative to ours... but for 2012 it was near future, I think.

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Indeed! That was a flashback to show exactly that: the origin of the Lizard-AI. That’s why I included the date. Of course, the danger of including any date in the near future is that advancing time risks turning your story into AU... unlesss you can argue that the meeting happened in secrete, or that you’ve changed the names to ‘protect the innocent’. But there is no resemblance of John Norris to Elon Musk, none at all, and that meeting never really happened. For sure. :pinkiehappy:

Honestly, not a bad story

Not bad at all

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Glad you liked it!

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