The Elusive Badgerpony
Joined 3rd Feb, 2013 ·
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OH I GET IT! HONDO FLANKS!
It's funny because it's like Honda which is a car, but it's not!
I love that joke!
Ha.... I dont get it. Good fic though.
edit: contrary to the 6 dumbasses who disliked it
*drops pants* My body is ready!
I must say, that was the sweetest, most endearing hardcore underage father-daughter incest story featuring technicolor horses that I have ever read.
This story was great, though one thing concerns me. Rarity being Sweetie's Mistress. Sweetie seems fine with it, but being so young, she's quite impressionable. I just hope Rarity hasn't accidently forced her to be a submissive. I hope that some of their lessons involved Rarity teaching Sweetie about domination as well.
This was way sweeter and more honest than I expected, excellent work. I'll be damned if this doesn't get featured.
Although, a few things I noted:
-With Rarity’s read in the air
-Rarity;s
Some of your
angry sexstories do wonders to my brain and this one's no different, even if its incest. You're really among one of the few authors that pull off such a taboo without any hints of discomfort or disgrace, HECK.7295363 Agreed. If this doesn't get featured, I'm gonna be pissed!
Daaaaaaaaang. I love me some long-form porn. This was really good stuff.
Some criticisms that came to mind, once the boner faded:
A) The dom/sub stuff between Rarity and Sweetie Belle was pretty distracting from the real point of the story: the sweet sweet father/daughter incest and doing lots of dirty sexy things to Hondo. I don't think anything would have been lost if that had been dropped and Sweetie Belle's sexual training had been more straightforward.
B) It was also kind of really odd that you called attention so regularly to Cookie Crumble and included so many of the characters' thoughts (and words even) on what she'd think of the whole thing, and then you didn't follow up on it at all after they were finished, instead falling into the unfortunately common porn pitfall of the story ending pretty much as soon as the sex does. Would've really liked to see that little Chekov's gun come off the mantle for a concluding scene back home; so many
sexypossibilities to imply there, even just with a fade to black. I know it sounds crazy to tell you to make the story LONGER when it's already nearly 20k words, but that feeling of incompleteness remains regardless.and C) super nitpicky but I counted several instances of using the wrong form of "it's/its" and misused homophones are one of my primary grammar pet peeves. Maybe give those a quick comb-over.
Other than that stuff, great story. Seriously, just....really, really excellent. Bravo.
--CG
7301971 Agreed with B. It would've been nice getting to see how Cookie Crumbles would've taken this. I'm hoping for a sequel where she gets in on the action and makes the threesome a foursome.
And I agree with your closing comments. This really is a great story! One of my top faves in terms of clopfics!
Anyone who is a follower to Smitty91 you should go to Fanfiction.net where he still active and making stories there.
Smitty's account: https://www.fanfiction.net/u/1396356/
I'm a friend of Smitty's and I hope everyone relay this message.
7512755 If you can do that not on my comments section that could be great thanks
7513503 Yeah sorry about that.
I'm glad I finally got around to reading this, huge thumbs up.
I'd like to see what their mothers reaction is. Hahah.
It's a pity I can't approve it several times. This story is going to be for use for a few days
I just read this and wanted you to know, I think this is some really fine piece of clopfic :)
How can you take this seriously.
Resisting Rarity? Hmmmm uhnmm pffff... A minute maybe?
Resisting Sweetie Belle too!? Ok that's pushing it!
Resisting both at once!? Ha! Now I know this was attempted humor ^^
Role-playing sisters... - is a nuclear option indeed. Something gonna blow and blow big time!
7703362
It was approved... Made me curious too
7703362
You and me both. Then again, I think we all would, which is why I would love to see a sequel to this.