The Elusive Badgerpony
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Name of story: Night With the Wonderbolts.
Grammer 1-10: 9.5
Pros:
I have to admit this story was really good. I'm not one for clop but I must admit bravo sir bravo.
The amount of detail you went into this story was abosolutly amazing.
Finally you had very few grammical errors and that is good. I must say sir you are a brilliant fic writer.
Cons.
There is actually not that many problems in this story you did have few spelling errors and some puncuation (Lol pardon my bad spelling myself XD) but those can easily be fixed.
Despite this being a clop I was hoping for a bit a of back story about why Soarin and Spitfire became attracted to each other. But again this is a clop so it is something you shouldn't expect.
Also the amount of cursing that was involved in this I'm not saying I don't use cursing in my fics. Just not as bad as this. Some parts it seems you've just gotten carried away with it and starting writing the word fuck in every sentence back in the begining. I'm just saying it kind of pulled me away, but again this is your story, and if so this could easily be fixed.
Notes: But over all this was a extremely well written clop for a oneshot this is possibly one of the best sir you have just recieved a like and a fav. Also if you could so kindly check out my story, it's not a clop it's a comedy. (Dead Rising Case: Equetdemic.) And good luck with any other stories you might write later. Because I may come back for more... That did not come out right at all. Lol. Good day.
2202480 agreed
This was a pretty good story. Clop-fics are always odd to me because of them being... well, clop-fics. This had great detailing and was more than just a mindless fuckfest story.
Oh stop it you. The story is great. The humor was a little strange but it didn't really detract from anything.
Also, thank you for choosing SoarFire instead of one the other overrated mainstream pairings. You don't see a lot that
nowadaysat all.And by the way, the author's name is at the bottom of the picture.
OMFC (Oh My Fucking Celestia) Rutting on a cloud. Soft and smooth as a cloud.
2210514 I'm really more of a fan of older pairings like SpitSoarin' and AppleMac. I dunno why. I'm just old-school like that.
2210641 Well, it isn't so gentle...
2212834
SpitSoarin' AND AppleMac? ...you are simply awesome.
2213133 hey now
A very nice clopfic, but the problem is there's little reason as to why Soarin and Spitfire love one another, nor is there any real given backstory. It's still a great clopfic though since there's a lack of SoarinFire out there.
Its... an ok clopfic. I know you said it was like one in the morning, but do you really feel it necessary to add in so many fucks?
Just sayin...
2295588 I'm a fuckin' vulgar motherfucker.
2295711
Oh yeah? Well, you can shut your goddamn mouth you fuckin' gay cocksucking brony lover! You ain't got shit on me!
So, where were we?
2295711 you don't wan a fuck with me I'm fuckin batman ill fuck yo girl and yo fuckin daughter cause i don't give a fuck FTW WTF FUCKK YALL
2344904>>2340630 Fuck you all, you fucking fuckers and suckers of fucking cock, you're a right pair of shit-dicking faggot fuckers! A pair of normal-ass cockloving mama cunt-smellers from fucking hell! The fucking Apples don't have shit on the fucking inbreeding in your family fuckery tree! Ya pair of shit-shifters!
^That is probably the most hilarious conversation I've read all week.
2344927
I proudly admit, I am soundly beaten.
2358203 *bows*
2358480 lolz
*adds to favorites list*
Romance felt a bit rushed, but it was still a lovely story! Thumbs up!
Wow
Dat author's note though.
Star Trot facehoof
Also their wing should have already been up when they first got aroused
(I'll explain if needed)
Dat Author's note almost made me choke on my sandwich.
4555298 Were you really eating a sandwich while reading this?
4588245 yes, it was a peanut butter sandwich to be exact.
4588364 Well, props to you for that feat in multitasking.
4589333 well, I feel the sarcasm meter screaming.
4245176 his story, his rules. If wingboners only happen when they climax then thats how it is here.
4995622 really, it has been 21 weeks, and i totally for got about this, and that is all you have to say? I know authors have the final say.
Anyway,
"Star Trot"
Wow, that was a odd nerdy/geeky thing for me back then
4997209 Yep, this is all I have to say to that
and its now not nerdy/geeky to you anymore?^^
Pretty sure the first section isn't supposed to be there twice, unless there's some sort of time loop going on there...
5350453 No, there's a reason for it. A stupid reason seeing as this is almost two years old now but a reason nonetheless.
5351488 Not quite sure I understand, but okay.
I don't like this shipping very much
I consider them a like a sister and brother
But nice story though
5362649 Even then..
Inscest = Wincest!
5362649 With who you ship Soarin then?
5535965 SoarinDash (If you don't like this couple its okay)
But, I like Soarinfire
5536116 I don't understand that. You know that Soarin is like 10-15 years older then Dash right?
5536118 No
5536128 We'll think about it. How old is Dash? 20 something. Soarin is co captain of the bolts. Let's say he got in when he was about her age. She was probably still a filly or teen. Then he works for let's say six years or so before he get's a promotion. Add all that and it's 10-15 years.
5536141 So whats the problem of shipping them?
even if soarin is 10 - 15 years old than dash whats the problem? we don't even know there real age
5536163 It is a problem.
Ships are stupid anyways. Seriously non of the mane six ever shown interest in anybody and people keep "shipping them".
The first time Dash and Soarin met he was more interested in pie
5536182 Haha
5536188 It's true. The second time he got injured and Dash was more concerned about braging about her flying skills.
5536182 Yeah, like you know Cometsparkle Comet is a Original character and have no interest in twilight. and Pokeypie pokey loves to pop balloons and pinkie love balloons. So your right, Ships are always stupid.
uhh i thought that soarin had green eyes?
5536218
can not tell if sarcasm or not sarcasm