• Member Since 26th Nov, 2011
  • offline last seen 16 minutes ago

Rated Ponystar


"You think you know me..."

T
Source

Edited by TheMyth and roker12

It had been so many years since Lightning Dust was kicked out of the Wonderbolt Academy. She never thought much about those days, nor of Rainbow Dash. Upon meeting again after so many years, Rainbow wants to know what Lighting Dust has been up to.

And so she tells her. She tells her about the parents that washed their hooves of her. About the stallion who became a real father. About the dream she was able to fulfill. And the family she came to love.

This is her story from nothing to something.

Note: The artwork is not mine, I found it on Ponychan.

Chapters (12)
Comments ( 134 )

Thank you so much! :heart: You're seriously the best ever.

5450473
Thanks, could you mention the fic in a blog post? To help get viewers?

5450486

I was already writing one, lel

I remember you showing me this. nice start to a great story!

That was a brilliant start. I loved how you characterized Lightning Dust here and the story sounds quite intriguing so far. You have captured my attention and have earned an upvote, favorite, and follow from me. Excellent work, and I'm eager to read what happens next. :twilightsmile:

He stepped forward and grinned, holding his hoof out. “Whazzup? I’m Spectrum. And I’m gonna be the best flier in class.”

“Oh really?” said Midflight with an equal competitive grin. “We’ll I’m Midflight, and I’m going to be the best flier in class.”

‘Oh? Wanna test that? How about a race right now!?”

You're going to ship them, and it's going to be fucking adorable.

ANGST

No, but really, you need to do a find-and-replace for "Lighting" with "Lightning".

Also, the family drama was a bit... weak. When a parent kicks their kid out for being a failure, I want to feel like I got donkey-punched in my icy little heart. Not apathetic. This was just melodramatic, and felt contrived.

5450724
Glad for it. That was really bugging me.

Overall, I'm enjoying it. I wish more people wrote Lightning Dust.

5450730
they do, most of the time though its as a villain

5450741
Look at the number of Lightning Dust stories, and compare it to, say, the number of Sonata Dusk stories.

Nobody cares about Dust, even if she is best pone.

Sorry to comment again, but since you were wondering what the source of the cover image you used was, I managed to find the original link.
Link
5450730

I wish more people wrote Lightning Dust.

Same here. Hopefully, a few other talented writers will also do a Lightning Dust story.

It'll be interesting so where this goes. Also Vorpal Gust...seriously Pegasi parents need to chill on the Awesome McCool Name thing..

This is the moment I've been waiting for...

Her parents are jerks, but it's been known to happen. One child overshadows the other. I do wonder how she ends up rich though?

Inheritance?

This is an interesting tale and I hope for some reactions from Rainbow Dash as this tale goes on. Maybe showing how Rainbow Dash reacted to this tale and maybe have felt more guilty over how it all turned out for Lighting Dust and her may make this tale a bit more sympathetic to Lighting Dust plight.

Please do keep up the good work upon such a great tale like this one.

A story about Lightning Dust? Awww yeah. I am so reading this.

I read this, and I'm glad you wrote this story for her.

Lyi

I feel sorry for Lightning Dust...living in her sister's shadow. Eeeevil parents!

Her servants should call her “Mistress”.

Can you have Dust murder her parents in cold blood, make it look like an accident and get inheritance? Pretty please?

Very much going to enjoy this story and it's off to a great start!

...Fucking scumbag parents...:twilightangry2:

Off to a great start!

I'm guessing her parents pass away later and she inherits the home as the next-of-kin. These parents have to be the absolute worst I've seen in a fic in a while though. Holy crap. :twilightoops:

I have a feeling this will be an excellent story, so into my faves it goes!

Now I do wonder if Spitfire herself would enter the story ?

I mean with such a strong tie to the Winderbolts even Spitfire has to give her a second chance after hearing her story or at least feel a bit sorry for her.

Great update to an interesting tale.

5533539


Based on the intro that doesn't happen

Damn, that was an emotional rollercoaster. Great chapter. :ajsmug:

There are no words... just feels upon fields of feels :applecry:

Finally sat down to read this, and it was worth the wait.

I think you could use an editor, but this is a good story and it's off to a good start. Keep it up. :pinkiesmile:

I'm curious as to what Lightning Dust will do from here. I also like how you brought Spitfire in and had her and Lightning Dust meet up again in an emotional manner. That was a touching moment. Actually, the whole chapter was gripping, and I like how you were able to get me invested in the characters so well and made me sympathize with them naturally. Excellent work as usual, and I'm eager to read what will happen next. :twilightsmile:

A most excellent chapter!

Worked with a guy who switched. She was much happier

Well I'll be. That was some emotional moment between Spitfire and Lighting Dust. Well deserved moment of you ask me.

Great update to a great story.

I need to find my own path in life.”

the smartest decision right there

Really nice update. :twilightsmile: I think Lightning Dust turning down Spitfire's offer was the wisest decision she could have made.

However, I do have a nitpick with this chapter. There were quite a few mistakes, including calling her "Lighting Dust" instead of "Lightning Dust" most of the way through (including the author's note). CTRL+F should fix that though! :twilightsheepish:

Here are some others:

It was the helpless that she hated remembering the most. Being held down, a victim without anyway of fighting back when she had the ability to.

*helplessness that
*without any way of

Although I last heard he commit suicide three years later after his sentence.”

*committed suicide

Yet all Lightning wanted to do was sleep in the master sized cloud bed that Redstreak had given to her for the night.

*master-sized

Lighting Dust’s eyes widen as she shot straight up.

*widened
(Also one of the instances where she is called Lighting instead of Lightning.)

Lighting Dust’s eyes widen as she slowly turned around and looked at the female in front of her.

*widened
*Lightning

Of course, you will have to earn your keep around her.

*around here.

Keep up the good work! I'm looking forward to the next chapter. :)

wow to say I am impressed with this story is a understatement this is good.
and to think this is only going to be 5 chapters?
you are selling your self short 5 chapters is just to short for this.
do keep you with your good work.
Harts Fire

I like where this is going.

5887227

So do I. Your take on the Equalists was quite interesting too Ponystar.

From leading brainwashed townsfolk to leading a terrorist group...That's an interesting take on Starlight Glimmer.

she had technically quitted the military as well.

quit

You’re sister told me that I would be expecting you.

your

She quickly left the room to make her way to the kitchens when he saw Butter Blue holding a tray out already for her with Redstreak’s favorite tea and biscuits.

she

“Very well, we shall trust your judgment. Now, again, what do you know of my plan?”

Pretty sure you meant "I" at that point, since she switched over to "my" later on in the same line.

The Cult of Equality claimed responsibility for the attack and were not the number one wanted group in Equestria.

now

Really like this story and now she's joining a black ops group; awesome + 20%

Also I don't mind short chapter and actually prefer them.

sweet chapter it is looking as if lighting dust will going much farther then the Wonderbolts ever code.

This story has a beautiful storyline and, well, everything is great -except for one thing Lightning Dust is always spelled as "Lighting Dust". Sorry, I'm a spelling [not grammar] nazi.:twilightblush:

wow this story just got supper good.
Harts Fire

I agree with 6097017; this just got really interesting.

I was going to comment on the short duration of the unit, given its nature, but see that my intended target of comparison, Seal Team Six, lasted only 7 years in its original incarnation before being "dissolved". Probably still an apt comparison.

I do love a bit of action, and it looks like that's where this is headed. There were a few mistakes/typos here and there, but overall a good chapter!

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