Episode 66: MAYHEM IN PONYVILLE (In Other Words: Another Typical Day) (MMDW Arc Finale)
You and Rainbow Dash continue to circle back-to-back each other as the Guards, Mare Do Wells, and the fan clubs get closer to the both of you. You gulp slightly in fear as you say to Rainbow Dash,
"Uh Rainbow, I think it would be a good time to get out of here. We're out numbered by at least a million to two, and I don't think I need to remind you what's going to happen to me if the guards or the Mare Do Wells catch me!"
You hear Rainbow grunt in annoyance before she says,
"No way! This plan is too awesome to fail. Just let me think of something to fix this!"
You can't help but sigh at Rainbow's stubbornness as you think in dread,
I wonder who's stubbornness is gonna get me killed first, Applejack's or Rainbow's?
You snap out of your thought as you look around in panic as you see that the groups of ponies who want to do bodily harm to you are getting closer. You also see the malice in the guards' eyes get more extreme as they get closer to you. You gulp in fear before you look at Rainbow and practically scream in panic,
"Rainbow! Unless a changeling comes by or Mare Do Wells can be distracted by clouds, whatever your plan is ain't gonna work!"
As soon as you said that Rainbow get's a look in her eyes as she says,
"I got it! Ten- I mean Offender, you're a genius!"
You blink in shock as you say weakly,
"I...I am?"
Rainbow nods her head as she flies above and over to the guards. The guards look like they're about to attack her when she quickly puts her hooves up and says,
Rainbow Dash claims that the other Mysterious Mare Do Wells are other changelings that The Foal Free Press was talking about leading to more chaos as Guards and ponies pounce of some of them.
"WAIT!"
The guards hesitant at her shout. Seeing this Rainbow smiles as she says,
"So you guys all know about how there are supposed to be changelings in town right?"
The guards (as well as the other ponies) nod their heads suspiciously. Rainbow grins even more as she continues,
"Well... did you know that those Mare Do Wells over there are changelings?"
At the guards shocked expressions Rainbow continues,
"I mean think about it. They all look alike, and they all have wings AND horns, plus changelings feed on love right? So what better way then to save ponies who would love them for saving them. A perfect buffet plan!"
While the guards nod their heads at this information, Flash, you and the Mare Do Wells just facehoof at this plan. You can't help but think,
Even I'm not dumb enough to fall for this! It's probably just five overbearing and over-emotional ponies. In other words teenagers.
While you snicker at your reference, Flash seems to voice your thought as he says,
"Look Miss Dash, there's no way they're changelings. If anything they're just normal po-"
Flash is suddenly cut off as one of the guards shouts,
"CHANGELINGS! THAT MEANS EXTRA ON OUR PAYCHECKES! BOYS! GET EM!"
Mass chaos ensues as many of the Royal Guards charge at the Mysterious Mare Do Wells which in turn causes the fan clubs to start charging at the guards and each other soon causing a free-for-all. Before you can join in...
You get magic-blasted through a window and into a room filled with elderly ponies. One of them is wearing a collar around his neck, and a black sleeved robe over his body. You stand up, dust yourself off, and turn to him before saying,
"I don't suppose a stallion of the cloth could do something about all this?"
"I have a nephew in Fillydelphia. I'm not exactly a fan of yours." he says grimly.
"Look, I'm not even the real Offender! Even if I was, how is my getting beaten to death by a mob any kind of justice?!"
"Oh... Buck off, grasshopper."
Suddenly a pair of boots pop out of his sleeves and hit you in the face before you can say anything, knocking you back through the window and into the fray.
As you tumble through the crowd of ponies, you knock down a few guards along the way. You slowly try to get back up only to get knocked back down to the ground. You look up in a daze to see a smirking Earth Pony Guard. However, you smirk back as you call out,
"Shoryuken!"
And hit him in the jaw with a rising uppercut that sends him into the air before he lands on a trio of brawling foals. You smirk slightly as you begin to scan the crowd as you think,
Now where the buck could tha-What the?
You spot a fat snobbish earth pony with a ponytail with a box of Orange-Frosted Buffo-Bombs cereal!
You leap towards the pony and geek out,
"No bucking way! Are those Orange-Frosted Buffo-Bombs with orange-frosted crunchy shells, chewy vanilla cream centers, AND tomahawk-shaped marshmallows that turn milk orange and give it an orange-creamsicle flavor?!"
"Not just ANY box, but an original unopened mint-condition box. NOT a forgery, copy, or result of a replication spell."
"B-but how?! I thought they were recalled and banned by Solar Flanks for being species-ist against Buffalo and having artificial sweetners that cause horn and wing cancer in ponies."
"I have my sources..." he simply responds.
"it's my favorite cereal of all time! I must has it!!! How much!" you ask as you take out your Bag of Bits.
"Deluded phony," the fat pony scoffs "Orange-Frosted Buffo-Bombs are for-"*wham*
"Falcon Punch!" you cry as your flame-encased hoof knocks the pony into a trio of Royal Guard and causing the box to fly in the air.
"MINE!!!" you yell as you grab the cereal in midair before stroking the box, "My precious..."
1 Box of "Orange-Frosted Buffo-Bombs" cereal added to Inventory
"Now..."
You gently put the box into The Inventory as the snobbish earth pony's (who is now embedded into a nearby wall) leg twitches slightly. You don't notice this as you finish your sentence,
"What was I doing... oh right! Oh where, oh where has my little Mare Do Well gone? Oh where, oh where can she be..."
You say the latter in a creepy lullaby tone as you begin to scan the mob (which is now even more chaotic as parents are trying to stop their foals from injuring themselves and each other... before getting into fights with the parents of other foals) for one of the Mare-Do-Wells while thinking,
Okay, one thing a hero must keep secret is their identity. So if I find out one of their identities...
You smirk slightly as you spot one of the unicorn Mare Do Well's. You gain a feral grin as you charge at her while parkouring through the mob towards her and you think,
I can figure out the rest of them and expose them to the whole town. That'll cause them to give up their vigilante ways for good! Now to just knock one of them out...
With that thought you reach the Mare Do Well and you...
You pull the cape over the Mare Do Wells and uppercut her a few times while her head is down before swinging her into a Royal Guard like a baseball bat. Meanwhile, Rainbow Dash is currently in an intense wrestling match with one of the wingless and hornless Mare Do Wells.
“And not a pit of mud in sight,” you hear Thunderlane say somewhere in the chaos, but you ignore him as you swing the MMDW into him, knocking the pervert into a flying Royal Guard and sending them both crashing into a group of fighting foals.
Suddenly the Mysterious Mare Do Well with wings uppercuts you and says, “Imposter!” in a familiar voice, forcing you to let go of the MMDW you've been using as a bat. You face her down and declare,
“WHO ARE YOU!” in your best Batmane voice, and you hear the Mare Do Well whimper, but unfortunately a horned Mare Do Well blasts you.
“WHO ARE YOU?!” growls the Mare Do Well in her own Batmane voice, “First you disband your horde and tell me to give up my ways so I don’t become you, then you go and do this?!” she growls.
“I... uh...” you really want to explain, but you’re only supposed to be pretending to be yourself, so you feign ignorance.
“WHAT IS YOUR ENDGAME?!” she growls, her horn glowing threateningly, but fortunately you're saved when Rainbow Dash zooms in from behind the Mysterious Mare Do Well and knocks her out of the way before grabbing you and flying you into the air.
Now safely floating above the brawl, you look up to Rainbow (who seems fine holding you up this whole time) and tell her,
"Rainbow, we just need to find out one of the Mare Do Well's identities, then we can figure out who the rest of them are from that. When we do we can expose them! Their vigilante life is over with, they get hauled off by the guard on suspicion of being a changeling, an the fan clubs will probably stop fighting. That's all we need to do, got it?"
Rainbow nod's her head at this, before she get's a confused look and asks,
"Uh... how will exposing the Mare Do Well's make me look cool again?"
You can't help but look at Rainbow with a look that screams 'Really?' before you facehoof and say,
"Rainbow, I think stopping the MASSIVE FREE-FOR-ALL in the middle of Ponyville is more impotent than your cool factor!"
Rainbow looks conflicted for a moment, before she sighs and says,
"Fine... but I get to finish off the last Mare Do Well."
You groan in annoyance before you say,
"Fine! Fine! Now wou-"
"THERE THEY ARE! SEIZE THEM!"
You and Rainbow look at where the shout came from only to see a couple of pegasus guards flying towards you and Rainbow Dash from multiple directions. Rainbow's eyes widen in panic, while you just simply sigh in annoyance before...
You and Rainbow create a tornado of whoop-flank where she grabs your back hoofs and begins swinging you in a circle faster and faster using her wings and hitting everypony around with you.
*ding*
"Rainbow Dash... I just got a great idea!"
With that you somehow manage to lift yourself up slightly to whisper your plan into Rainbows ear. When you finish she smiles at you before saying,
"Let's do this!"
With that said she tosses you above her head before grabbing you by the back hooves and starts swinging you in a circle faster and faster using her wings and knocking the guards away like a top of death.
"Ow. Ow. Ow. It's (Ow) Working (Ow)!" you say as your body is used as a bat.
When Rainbow Dash finishes the move, she uses the momentum to throw you at a Mare Do Well, who you proceed to Falcon Punch on impact, the punch knocking her into another trio of Royal Guards which in turn knocks them into three groups of fighting foals.
"MULTI-STRIKE!" Rainbow Dash declares as you run in and are about to unmask the vigilante when you notice out of the corner of your eye...
Some of the Tennant colts laughing maniacally and bringing out a bunch of blow torches, candles, lighters, etc.
“Alright fine, all of you want to keep fighting?” shouts Pip. “Then Burn in the name of Sir Tennant!”
“NO NO NO NO NO!” you shout as you use you rush over amd tackle the colts, knocking the fiery devices out of their hooves.
“Awwwww!” they all cry in disappointment.
“The Buck is the matter with you kids?” you scold them.
“We’re just trying to stop the brawl like Mr. Tennant would Mr. Offender,” says Rumble.
“By burning ponies alive?” you say.
“Well... I mean. Well when you put it like that...” stammers Rumble.
You mentally chide yourself for teaching kids a bad lesson,
“Look, Arson isn't the answer kids, sure it’s pretty and pure and yeah, I guess it would solve this mess by burning away all their hatred in cleansing magnificen- I DON’T HAVE PROBLEM!” you shout.
The colts look a little unnerved, but they put their heads down.
“Alright, we won’t burn them, we’ll just solve our problems with good old fashioned violence,” says Button Mash.
“Good Colts the last thing I need is inspiring more mini-Flag Burners...” you start (muttering the last part).
“Starting with you!” he shouts.
“Okay-Wait wha...”
“Get him!”
You are then suddenly swarmed by your Tennant fans, and blow after blow of tiny hooves rain down on you.
“Hey what the-”
“Tennant would take down the Offender if he had the chance!” says one colt.
“Ow! This is the most adorable beating ev- (*sok*) Eeeeeeeeeeee” you are suddenly kicked very painfully where the sun don’t shine. Armored shell protects you a lot, but still, it’s a kick to the nads.
“Nice kick chap.” says Pip.
“Thanks, Nightshade taught me it,” Button Mash says proudly.
"Hey, I wanted to hang out with her first." Rumble comments.
*snap*
Your "overprotective daddy" button pushed, you declare, "Psycho Crusher!" and spin smash through the mob of colts...
and right into a squad of guards.
“Take him alive if possible, use lethal force only if necessary!” shouts Flash.
“OH COME ON!!!”
You say as you take out your staff and slam it into the ground, scattering the guards (some getting smashed into food carts), but Flash flies above this and tackles you before wailing on you a few times.
Fortunately, Berry Punch tackles him off you and starts raining blows on him.
“Ow Ow! Hey cut it out!” he yells.
“NO! You stole my daughter’s Waffles yesterday you WAFFLE STEALER!” she shouts.
You take advantage of this distraction to run off while Berry Punch’s daughter shouts.
“Get him,mommy! Kill the Waffle Stealer!”
“REALLY?!!!” he shouts to the sky as Berry puts him in a headlock, but just before Berry can give Flash another punch to the face, Flash shouts out,
Flash and/or Pinkie clear up that Flash is NOT a waffle thief. As part of his waiter job, he can eat whatever is left behind on the table when the customer(s) leave.
"Woah woah woah! I didn't steal those waffles! As part of my job, Pinkie said I could eat leftover pastries and you and your daughter already paid and left!"
"Oh, is that it? I must've still had some booze in me then. Okay, sorry for beating ya into the ground then. Come on sweetie we need to leave before it get's really hectic."
With that said Berry drops Flash onto the ground as if he was a sack of potatoes and walks off with her daughter in hoof. As you watch this scene in amusement, you see Flash get up and glare at you as he says,
"Bucking mud pony... Ahem, You see... you leave destruction where ever you go. And your bad influence that makes ponies act violently!"
You glare at Flash slightly as you say,
"Hey I don't affect ponies nega-"
Suddenly you are interrupted when...
During the fight, all the kids break out into song as they beat each other up.
“What? But we just had a musical number,” says Nightshade on the roof.
“Yeah we usually have at least 5 a day around town, but two in the same location is rare even for us,” says Applebloom.
“I’m not complaining, I love show tunes,” says Sweetie.
“Of course you do,” snarks Scootaloo.
Music begins to play outta nowhere as a colt in the Mare Do Well fan club sings...
Time to go and get our kicks
Dropping out and getting in the mix now
With that he makes a gesture which causes a filly dressed in a MMDW costume to run up to the roof of a one-story house with a bungee cord.
Here in the backroom, nothing to do
We're not bored, we're just sick of you, yeah
Yeah, sick of you
On cue, the MMDW filly bungee cords upside down to drop down and grab a Rainbow-wigged filly.
Break down, take down
Now it's on
Sold out, blow out
Don't get caught
Well no, hay no
What you gonna do?
When we keep coming for you
You and Flash stare at the foal in confusion as you both think
Did he just say Donkey Kong?
Suddenly a member from the Rainbow Dash fan club bucks the singer away from the mic and catches it as he continues to sing,
See the shadows marching on
Yesterday's dreams are fled and gone
Dead and gone
Hear 'em cheering up above
Down below is push and shove
Yeah, push and shove
On cue, several Rainbow-wigged foals proceed to do just that.
Break down, take down
Now it's on
Sold out, blow out
Don't get caught
Well no, hell no
What you gonna do?
When we keep coming for you
As soon as the foal stops singing a Tennant fan club member knocks him out and nabs the mic from him before singing,
Bet some, get some
Knock you down
Alone now, showdown
Kiss the ground
Well no, hay no
What you gonna do?
Lights out, put 'em in twoooo
We'll be coming for you!
As he starts to air guitar with the mic, several Tennant foals start throwing stink bombs everywhere adding to the chaos. Suddenly the Tennant colt stops his air guitar when he notices a whole group of Mare Do Well fans have appeared and are staring him down. To that he responds,
What's up?
Buck you up
In response the MMDW fans sing,
Break down, take down
Now it's on
Sold out, blow out
Don't get caught
Well no, hay no
What you gonna do?
When we keep coming for you
Now a whole group of Rainbow Dash fans are singing as they too stare down the Tennant fan.
Bet some, get some
Knock you down
Alone now, showdown
Kiss the ground
Well no, hell no
What you gonna do?
Lights out, put 'em in two
We'll be coming for you
We'll be coming for you
We'll be coming for you
With that both groups charge at the Tennant colt and collide in a melee.
WITH THE CMC AND NIGHTSHADE
“What? But we just had a musical number,” Nightshade comments from on top the roof.
“Yeah we usually have at least 5 a day around town, but two in the same location is rare even for us,” says Apple Bloom.
“I’m not complaining, I love show tunes,” says Sweetie Belle.
“Of course you do,” snarks Scootaloo.
Apple Bloom glares at them as she says,
"Shhh, check out the Offender and Flash. Somethang's goin on!"
"Cool- Ohhh." Nightshade moans before taking another long sip from her ginger ale tub.
BACK WITH YOU
You and Flash stare in shock at the scene, before you quickly turn to him and say,
"I swear I did not teach them to sing like I do (although they are pretty good). I don't even know where they got the mic from!"
Flash just continues to glare at you, and it looks like he's about to charge when...
In spite of you disbanding the Horde and telling them NOT to help you, a few Horde members (particularity Octavia and Vinyl Scratch) still come to your aid.
"FOR THE HORDE!"
You and Flash look off to the side in surprise to see...
Another hooded figure appear suddenly and lands a three-hit Karate combo on the stunned Flash, knocking him down.
"No matter what you say, I- I mean we the true Horde will never abandon you!" the mare says in an oddly familiar classy voice.
Before you could berate her for ignoring your order to disband, suddenly a few more ponies in Horde cloaks show up causing even more chaos to the already hectic melee.
You use this opportuntiy to take off only to run into a Neighponese-looking Earth Pony Guard stallion wearing a red bandanna under his helmet. Noticing you he says,
"Tatakai no naka ni kotae ha aru. (The answer lies in the heart of battle.)" as he takes off his helmet and chucks off his regulation Royall Guard horseshoes before donning a pair of red gloves and charging at you.
"Shoryuken!" you both declare at the same time as they both use the technique ending in a draw as their uppercuts hit each other under the jaw and knock them both back.
"Very good offender... It seems you are as powerfull as the rumors say." Says the bandanna stallion.
"Thanks, you're also pretty good. By the way, how do you know that attack?" you ask.
"My master learned it from his master that is the descendant of masters that learned it from the original one, and you?"
"I read it in a book." you reply simply with a shrug. "And all those video games didn't hurt either."
"Of course... Your lack of control makes your self-training apparent. However, I know things that mere reading and games cannot teach!" he declares as he puts his two front hooves together and declares,
"Hadoken!!" as a magic ball shoots from his hooves and knocks you back.
"Ugh... Dang Magic..." you groan as you get back up.
"It's not magic, it is Ki... Hadouken!!" he declares as he throws another magic ball, but this time you're prepared,
"Would you Kindly BURN!!!" you say as you use the Power Glove to ignite the magic ball, causing an explosion that put smoke between you.
"Now... It's my turn..." you say.
"Talk is cheap." he replies.
"You asked it... Kaaaameeeee.....Haaaameeee" you declare as you bring your front hooves together and back.
"Wait... What? Are you really...?" the bandanna-wearing stallion says in surprise.
As the bandanna stallion prepares to defend himself against this attack, you suddenly say,
"Haaaaa!" as you throw both hooves forward... and only cause a gust of air to lightly breeze against him. He lets his guard down in disbelief as he says,
"Disgrace to your art-"
"Wouldyoukindlyfreeze!" you rapidly say, freezing the stallion in place as you run off. But find your path blocked by brawling ponies. Needing a distraction you point and yell,
"Look it's Luna posing for Playcolt!"
"WHERE?!" all the stallions (and quite a few of the mares) say as they all look around excitedly allowing you to run through them undetected into an alley where you crash into a strange filly spray painting a message on a wall,
"Discord Rules, Celestia Drools" you read.
A strange message, but at least tis not- Selena begins to say before you blink and your eyes widen as it now reads,
THE NIGHTMARE COMES
"GAHHH!" you yell in frustration...
"There he is!!!"
...Alerting the guard to your location. As you run off chased by the guards, one of them notices the graffiti and says,
"I knew it! The Hooded Offender is in league with Discord!!"
"What? No! It wasn't me... It was that fill-" you say only to notice that the strange filly has disappeared.
"Buck..." you mutter as you make a run for it and as you do you spot...
Spot Caramel and make him pay for eating YOUR Naco.
Caramel hiding under a table.
"Naco thief!" you remember darkly as you pull out your Power Glove and says, "Would you kindly GO FLYING!" before using telekinesis to pick up Caramel, swing him like a club to knock away the Royal Guard ponies chasing you, and then throw him into a crate of taco sauce.
As you smirk in satisfaction at getting your revenge you hear...
“Rainbows are lame!” shouts a MDW filly.
“Your hat is lame!” shouts a rainbow fan filly.
“Girls, girls!” shouts a Tennant colt. “Your outfits are equally stupid!”
“YOU TAKE THAT BACK!” they both shout as they turn on the colt together.
“Rainbows are lame!” shouts an orange filly wearing a Mysterious Mare Do Well hat and cape.
“Your hat is lame!” responds a rainbow-wigged fan filly.
“Girls, girls!” shouts a Tennant colt with an orange mane, “Can't we all just get along and agree that both your outfits are equally stupid!”
“YOU TAKE THAT BACK!” they both shout as they turn on the colt together and start beating on him.
Deja vu much... Selena comments.
You start to slow down as all the negativity begins to hit you. You can't help but think,
Curse my changeling-ness for sensing emotions! Normally I can just ignore it, but I guess since they're kids it affects me more. Luna, I need a drink...
Your eyes brighten when you see a bowl of punch behind two guards. You smirk slightly as you...
All this fighting is making you thirsty. Fortunatly you spot a tub of refreshment so you go,
"Uppercut! Downer-cut! Bowl of PUNCH!"
Punch your way over to the bowl of punch,
"Uppercut! (*sok*) Downer-cut! (*bam*) Bowl of PUNCH! (*shatter*)"
You then proceed to smash the empty punch bowl onto a nearby guards head, but before you have time too rest...
A pair of pegasus try to launch a tornado/twister at you, but it backfires as you should never use a cyclone against someling who's played ALOT of Street Fighter...
You look up to see a twister coming right at you! Unfortunately you look up too late a you get caught up in it and start getting spun around.
"Aw buck yeah!" a pegasus guard exclaims, "That bounty is mine!"
He rushes in to grab you while you're still in the tornado, but unfortunately for him...
You've played ALOT of Road Fighter. Managing to grab the Guardpony in midair, you put him into piledriver position and use the momentum to spin you both. As the twister dissipates, you both spin towards the ground as you call out,
As you both slam down onto a Cabbage cart, the force of the impact exploding the cart and sending cabbage heads zooming everywhere, slamming into and knocking over brawling ponies.
"MY CABBAGES! This place is worse than Fillydelphia!"
After you took care of that, you start to look around for the Mare Do Well's again, when you spot...
See a familiar pony with a purty hat and provoke him into going on a ADAMANTIUM RAGE! punching spree.
A familiar pony in a purty hat. Remembering a rant he went on a while ago, you quickly manage to sneak over and say,
"What did you think about the haunted mansion in 'Vampony: The Masquerade'?"
Hearing this, something in him snaps and he gives a insane yell as he screams (go to 10:00 in the video for comedy gold),
"What is supposed to be hurting me?! I'm a gorram vampony!" before taking out a toy flintlock pistol and rushing into a group of brawling Guards/Horde members/adult MMDW fans and starts swinging away. One filly throws a lamp at him, but he shatters it with a kick and yells,
"I DON'T CARE HOW MANY LAMPS YOU THROW AT ME, I'M NOT GONNA REVIEW THEM!!!"
With that, he just continues to rant as he hits everything in sight, knocking pones everywhere. Eventually one pony yells,
"Just get out of here you behatted nutjob!"
"NO, I'm not gonna get out. YOU'RE GONNA GET OUT! I'M A GORRAM VAMPONY! I'M A VAMPONY! I'M A VAMPONY! I'M A VAMPO-"
Fortunately his insanity-fueled rampage is ended when multiple ponies dogpile him, but you use his rampage to escape as you think,
Wow... he is the only pony I know (besides me) who would be getting into fights over something that stupid. Oh well, he seems to be handling it pretty well. Now all I need to do is fine Mar-*crash*
Your eyes widen in shock as you get pushed down by a rainbow blur. You groan in pain as you see Rainbow Dash slowly get off you. You glare at her slightly as you get up and say,
"Rainbow! What... the... buck."
Your eyes widen in shock as you see that you and Rainbow Dash are now surrounded by guards. You and Rainbow go back to back as you say,
"Uh, Rainbow? Got any ideas?"
Rainbow Dash shakes her head as she says,
"Not really. Does punching and kicking them all count as a plan?"
You chuckle slightly at this as you say,
"Not really...but that hasn't stopped me yet!"
With that you and Rainbow are about to charge the guards when...
You notice a colt on top of a hill, but surprisingly he's wearing polished white armor with blue stripes and helmet which has a T-shape visor. He makes a gesture with his hoof and suddenly another colt appears next to him until more start appearing.
"Wait, are those Clone Troopers?" you comment.
One of the colt throws several stink bombs mocked up to look like canisters into the air and detonates it around you thus catching the 5 MDW, Royal Guards and the fan foals off guard. You look around and see Rainbow Dash wondering what's going on until you hear a mighty battle cry.
"For the horde!"
"What the hay is going on!?!" Rainbow Dash shouts in confusion.
"Colt Troopers!"
You notice the colts holding a modified version of a water gun which was glowing cyan blue. He pulls the trigger squirting bright blue water... that completely misses anything.
"Flank them!" one of the Colt Troopers shouts causing them to open fir- I mean water with their water guns only to completely miss as well. While you and Rainbow Dash stare at the troopers in confusion and awe, one of them comes up to you.
"Hooded Offender sir, Me and my team will escort you to safety and away from this battle. Follow me sir." Soon he is joined by a few more troopers.
You and Rainbow share a shrug as you and her begin to follow the colt troopers... Until they get tackled by squad of Mysterious Mare Do Well fan fillies. Before you or Rainbow Dash could react, Rainbow get's tackled by a orange blur. You look back in shock to see Flash and Rainbow staring each other down. And it looks like they're about to charge at each other, when a random guard charges at Rainbow Dash. However, the rainbow daredevil just smirks as she...
Uses a karate-move to maneuver the guard in front of her where he gets accidentally socked in the face by Flash.
"Where the buck is Twilight?!" Rainbow Dash asks as she hits Flash in the face with a headbutt.
"Huh? What do you mean?" you ask as you Falcon Punch a Mysterious Mare Do Well into a pair of guards.
"Well, Celestia ordered us to get the civvies out of your- I mean, the Offender's way if we see him. Not a whole lot of evacuating going on right now!"
One of the horned Mare Do Wells suddenly stiffens, and her hat actually jumps up from her head, straight into the air before it lands on her again and she whistles before teleporting away. On que, several of the Mysterious Mare Do Wells also run off as well, but even with this reduction, it still leaves you with the brawling ponies to deal with.
Rainbow Dash tackles Flash before he hits you again, but he throws her off and crouches down, ready to charge.
"Snap out of mind control Raibow Dash! Besides, speed isn't enough!"
Rainbow just smirks and mirrors his pose.
"That's what slowpokes say."
They fly at each other and bounce off and climb high into the sky, continuously circling and charging together. The impacts sound like thunder, and at the apex of their battle, they lock together and plummet down before smashing down onto a table. When the dust settles, Rainbow Dash is still standing as she says,
"What I tell ya? Slowpoke-"
"Armor." Flash smiles before sweeping out her legs from under her and rolling away. Rainbow Dash flaps her wings before she hits the ground, spinning in place and landing on her feet again. They crouch down for another round, but you notice that Ponyville is now in a MASSIVE free-for-all with guards, ponies, and even foals beating each other to a pulp. In annoyance you yell,
"Enough of this bullspit! Would you kindly...
Try to use "Murder of Crows" only for it to not work due to there not being any crows nearby. Then you drink the Insect Swarm plasmid and unleash a swarm of hornets and bees from your arm holes leading to ponies yelling,
"Bees. My Celestia."
"OH, NO! NOT THE BEES! NOT THE BEES! AAAAAHHHHH! OH, THEY'RE IN MY EYES! MY EYES! AAAAHHHHH! AAAAAGGHHH!"
"Be swarmed by crows!"
...
Instead of seeing a stream of crows pop out of your arm holes and attack the guards like your glove was supposed to, nothing happens. You glare at your glove in annoyance as you shake it up and down while saying,
"Come on you hunk of junk! Work! You were doing fine with the crows back on Hearts and Hooves day, why not now!"
Rainbow Dash just looks over at you in confusion as she asks,
"Tennant! What are you doing! I can't stop this riot with you just standing there, so hurry up and blast them with your magic or something!"
You just glare at her in response as you shout,
"I'M TRYING ALRIGHT!"
You glare at your glove, before you remember the bottle of Insect Swarm in The Inventory. Smirking as you uncomfortably move your hoof around to reach into the Inventory to pull out the Insect Swarm, you finally manage to grab it. When you pull it out and uncork it with your magic, you tell Rainbow,
"Hey Rainbow.."
"What!?"
"This is gonna sting... alot."
With that said you down the contents of the Insect Swarm ("Mmm... Honey."), and as soon as you do, you feel a burning buzzing pain in your Power Glove arm. You pull back the sleeve to see your arm starting to get a a hive-wasp texture as painful boils start to sprout. You grit your teeth and give pained labors of pain as insects start to sprout from some of the boils and go crawling into your arm holes. Rainbow Dash notices this and looks at you in a worry/panic as she ask/yells,
"Tennant! What the buck is happening?!"
You grit your teeth in pain and smirk slightly as you say,
"That Rainbow, was a upgrade."
With that you throw your arm forward and release a horde of wasps, hornets, and bees that swarm out and start stinging everypony around you,
Because most of them are bees, one of the Royal Guard lieutenants takes off the sun glasses he was wearing and says,
The guards try to shake them off, but other ponies are less calm about it than others...
"Oh, my god! Bees! Bees! Millions of Bees!"
"I'll never eat honey again!"
"Mare up Buzzer! They're just bees!"
"WHY DID I HAVE TO BE ALLERGIC TO BEES!"
You and Rainbow Dash can only stare in absolute shock and confusion at how out of hoof everything quickly became. The silence is ended when you say,
"Aaaaand that's my cue to exit."
With those words of wisdom, you make a break for one of your escape routes. Rainbow Dash notices this and shrieks...
“What?!” she shrieks, “Don’t leave me alone!” she says as she throws one of the Mare Do Wells off of her and flies after you.
“What?! Don’t leave me alone!” as she smashes past a hornet-swarmed Flash and begins to chase after you, which you don't notice as you continue to run for your escape route.
MEANWHILE WITH THE CUTIE MARK CRUSADERS AND NIGHTSHADE
Foal Free Press; READ ALL ABOUT IT! CIVIL WAR IN PONYVILLE! MASKED OFFENDER ATTACKS TOWN!
Nightshade to other CMC; Do you think we over-exaggerated what happened?"
Others ; Hmmm... Nope!
Nightshade and the CMC are watching everything play out, pitching headlines for this story,
"Ponyville Pounded by Powerful Platoons of Pegasi!" Scootaloo shouts.
"No, no, no," Apple Bloom says, "Hero Standoff Ends in Street Fight!"
"I got it! READ ALL ABOUT IT! CIVIL WAR IN PONYVILLE! MASKED OFFENDER ATTACKS TOWN!" Sweetie Belle yells.
"Don't you think we're over-exaggerated what happened?" Nightshade comments.
"Hmmm... Nope!" the others say unanimously.
Nightshade shrugs as she says, "I still say we should call it a clusterbuc-"
"Shush!" Sweetie Belle says as she points to Rainbow Dash chasing the Offender away. "They're getting away! We have to follow them!"
"But what about all this?" Nightshade points out.
Sweetie taps her chin in thought for a moment, and her eyes light up. She takes a breath and shouts,
"OH NO! WHAT ABOUT THE CHILDREN? THE FOALS ARE FIGHTING, TOO! WON'T SOMEPONY PLEASE THINK OF THE CHILDREN?!"
The brawl pauses at this as all the adults stop fighting and turn to see the foals have gotten caught up in the chaos and are beating/squirting/throwing/noogieing each other.
"What have we done?!" a mare cries.
"They don't know what to think about this mindless violence," another says.
Flash Sentry flies over and into the middle of a 5-colt melee and pulls them off each other.
"Break it up, boys! We need to have a long and serious talk about this."
Nightshade gawks at the scene, "Wow, they actually stopped."
"I know," Scootaloo says. "Look, they're actually listening to what Flash is saying."
"Well, he is a guard," Apple Bloom adds. "He knows what fighting is all about. If he can't explain what violence is, when and where it might be necessary, and the kind of impact it can have on ponies and their lives, who can?"
Nightshade nods. "I think everyone could learn something from this."
"Yeah, we don't have time for all that life lessons stuff." Scootaloo says as she puts away her notepad and runs to the ladder to climb down,
"Nothing interesting is happening here anymore. Let's follow the Hooded Offender and Rainbow Dash!"
BACK WITH YOU
You don't notice any of this as you see your escape route... a sewer cover (you spotted this while you were scouting out the area, and you remembered how you used the sewers with Flash and the CMC during the Loveocalypse. Plus, you managed to get a look at a map of the Ponyville sewer system after that whole thing and you remembered that there was a sewer pipe that leads to a dumping ground in the Everfree forest). Anyway, you open the sewer cover and jump in followed in by a Rainbow blur a few minutes later...
As you try to escape through the sewers you see a bit of graffiti on the wall that says.
“Gummy Was Here” and right below it “So Was Tank.”
You then encounter a few Alligators in the Bucking Sewer, probably Gummy’s parents. React accordingly.
As you run through the system of sewer pipes and barely manage to avoid tripping on empty boxes of pizza, you briefly pause when you notice some graffiti that says,
Gummy Was Here
and right below it
So waz Tank
As you're reading the graffiti, you suddenly notice an alligator sleeping beneath the graffiti.
"AHHHHHHHHHHHHH! ALLIGATOR, THERE'S A BUCKING ALLIGATOR IN THE BUCKING SEWER! WHO WOULD HAVE THOUGHT THAT THAT WAS A THING!"
With that you run past the alligator. Not noticing that the alligator gives a brief yawn... revealing that the alligator has no teeth.
After some more running, you turn a corner to where the exit should be, but screech to a halt when you run into a grated roadblock with a small squad of Royal Guards currently minding their own business,
"-on't call it a Quarter Pounder with Cheese?"
"Nah, dude, they got the metric system. They wouldn't know what the buck a Quarter Pounder is."
"What do they call it?"
"They call it a-Sweet Celestia!"
All the guards snap to attention and take up a formation in front of the roadblock.
"What was that you were saying about Ms. Sparkle being paranoid for setting up a checkpoint here?"
"Shut it."
"I don't have time for this FUS RO DAH!"
With that roar of power, the Royal Guard ponies are sent exploding out of the sewer, smashing through the roadblock and giving you a clear path into the Everfree forest.
EVERFREE FOREST
After jumping out of the sewer pipe and into the bog you say,
"Oh thank Luna I made it. Stupid sewers, stupid alligators in sewers, and stupid sewer guards. Now I just need to hide ou-*wham*"
You suddenly feel yourself being tackled from behind. You quickly get back up and turn around to punch but see it’s Rainbow.
“The hay man?! Why’d you bail on me?!” she asks angrily.
“I told you that I would when things got too crazy!” you angrily reply.
“Well yeah, but still, I was getting swarmed!”
“Well guards won’t try to kill you for being dressed as the most wanted being in Equestria!” you counter
“Oh yeah...”
You take your hood off revealing your doctor scarf and face mask as you put your hat back on as you continue, “So I say we just stay here and wait for this whole thing to blow ov...”
“TENNANT?!” shouts a familiar sounding country voice.
You both look over and see Applejack taking off her Mare Do Well face mask.
“Applejack?” both you and Rainbow shout in surprise.
“What in tarnation are you doing dressed as The Offender?!” she asks.
“What are you doing dressed as the Mysterious Mare Do Well?!” you both reply.
Another Mare Do Well comes forth and takes her hood off, “Applejack, we weren’t supposed to reveal ourselves yet!” says a frustrated Twilight.
“Twilight?!” you and Rainbow yell.
“I know, but something ain't right here, Tennant ain't the no good varmit” Applejack says to Twilight, ignoring you.
Another Mare Do Well takes her hood off and it’s Pinkie, “Oh oh, maybe there are multiple Offenders like there’s multiple of us!”
“I don’t think so Pinkie...” says a guilty looking Fluttershy as she takes her mask off.
“I concur, The Offenders cloak is much more stylish and intricate than that one,” says Rarity as she points at you.
You look at her in annoyed confusion as you think
First you think it's tacky, now you think its stylish and intricate. MAKE UP YOUR MIND LADY! Now besides that...WHAT IN THE NAME OF LUNA IS GOING ON!?
Finally, Rainbow has enough and voices what both of you are thinking.
“OK! Just what in the name of Tartarus is going on here!” shouts Rainbow Dash.
"And how did you find us? We went through the stinking sewers! There should have been no way you could have found us?" you add.
Pinkie jumps up and down excitedly as she says,
"Oh Oh Oh! We found you because my Pinkie Sense said to go to the sewers and Mister Gator in the sewers told me he saw you come by!"
You and Rainbow stare at Pinkie in confusion, before you say,
"Pinkie... are you saying the alligator in the sewer told you we went by him?"
Pinkie nods her head excitedly as she says,
"Yeppers! I mean Fluttershy had to translate a bit, but Yeppers!"
"That and we followed the sound of the Fus Ro Dah." Twilight adds.
You stare at her for a few minutes before you take a deep breath and say,
"You know what, buck it. You're just too random to even complain about right now. Anyway what happened is..."
ONE EXPLANATION LATER
“So you had Tennant dress up as The Hooded Offender just so you could be bigger than Mare Do Well again?” asks Twilight.
“Yeah, ever since that Gabby Gums article, I haven’t been seen as cool anymore” Rainbow laments.
“Wow, a whole day...” you mutter sarcastically.
“Oh don’t worry about that Rainbow, we found out that the Cutie Mark Crusaders were the ones writing those articles, now we can shun and ostracize them, I know I have,” says Rarity.
“Darn Tootin,” agrees Applejack.
“Wait really? i mean those girls are definitely grounded, but how can you abandon your own sisters?" you say.
“BECAUSE SHE STOLE MY DIARY!!!...” Rarity says unhinged, “Ahem... and no amount of blood can make up for the secrets they revealed.”
“Well there go the flying lessons I was gonna teach the squirt,” Rainbow Dash says, “But getting back on topic, you guys decided to show me up because you thought I was showboating too much?”
“Yes, your head was getting too swollen and it was annoying all of us,” says Twilight.
“Then why didn't you all tell me?” she asks.
“We tried, but you kept just blowing us off!” says Applejack.
“Oh come on, I wasn't that bad was I?”
“Yes!” everypony says as you add,
"Even I tried to tell you, but you were willing to ignore a pony falling to her death just to sign more autographs!"
“On top of all the showboating, you were making Spike write your book without pay!” says Twilight.
“Oh please, as if you pay him for all his chores,” counters Rainbow.
“I do pay him! Not only that, but he gets Gems as bonuses plus he’s under my insurance policy” responds Twilight.
“Oh... Well how the hay did you all come up with this Mare Do Well idea?”
“Tennant gave me an idea about how to teach you a lesson, and we were in a comic book store, so we just rolled with it,” says Twilight.
Rainbow glares at you and you chuckle nervously as you remember off hoofedly telling Twilight about how you would deal with an annoying Rainbow Dash,
“Hey, I just said to give you a taste of your own medicine, I didn't plan any of this.”
“We never meant to hurt you Rainbow,” says Fluttershy.
“Yeah, that was never part of the plan,” agrees Pinkie, “we just thought that your brains had been all gobbledeegooped by the Offender and we were trying to help you.”
“By tackling and beating me up?” she asks.
“Yupperooni!” she replies.
“Thanks... but ya guys, I’m sorry if I was getting on your nerves” she humbly responds.
“No, we’re sorry Rainbow, we never meant any of this to get so out of hoof” says Twilight.
“Don’t worry, I forgive you guys too...” she says as they all have a group hug, which you are suddenly pulled into.
“And we’re sorry to you too Sugarcube, we didn't know it was you,” says Applejack.
“Yeah, sorry Tennant,” they all respond (although you barely notice that Applejack, Rainbow Dash, and Fluttershy are mainly directing their portions of the group hug towards you).
“That was a very nice thing you did for Rainbow... even if everything kind of went to Tartarus back there,” says Twilight.
"By the way, why did you even agree to go along with Rainbow Dash's plan anyway." Rarity asks.
You chuckle nervously and rub a hoof behind your head, "I... thought it would be a good prank?"
At this, Twilight hoofs a small bag of bits to a smirking Rarity while Twilight mouths to Bugze Couldn't last 1 more week could you!, Fluttershy rolls her eyes as she already knows, Rainbow Dash and Pinkie hoofbump you for doing a good job, and Applejack mumbles, "Why did ah fall for such a goof ball..."
“Anyway... think we should go back and stop the riot Rainbow Dash indirectly created with her ego?” you ask.
All of the Mane 6 get stunned reactions at this, but what you don’t know is that four certain fillies had watched and overheard this conversation.
“Girls... I know what we have to do,” says Nightshade.
BACK TO PONYVILLE
When everypony gets back to town, all Seven of you go on stage and begin to explain the whole thing to the guards and the town. In essence, the moral of the story is; don’t let Flame Wars occur between different fandoms, and don’t be a jerk to your friends.
On a nearby rooftop, the Cutie Mark Crusaders and Featherweight, get everyone’s attention, and get quite a few glares.
They publicly apologize for their actions, and how they only wanted to get their cutie marks. Basically their whole apology letter from the episode, said aloud and everypony forgives them. Then Nightshade adds,
“Besides, this was all Diamond Tiara’s fault anyway.”
“You jerks, we’re ruined now,” says Diamond Tiara as she hastily climbs onto the roof, “Now I’ll never bankrupt daddy!”
“Wait, what was that?” says a concerned Filthy Rich.
“Besides, you can’t trust her! She’s a secret Alicorn!” says the twitchy Diamond Tiara as she rips off Nightshade’s vest which gasps from the crowd (especially a worried one form you) but underneath there are no wings.
“Wai... Wha...” stutters Diamond Tiara, before Nightshade glares into her eyes,
“No one rips my vest! And you’re not my boss anymore, You’re fired! FALCON KICK!”
And knocks Diamond Tiara away... forgetting that they are on a roof.
“AAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!”
“Nightshade! What have you done?!!!” the Cutie mark Crusaders cry in fear.
As she sees her plummeting, she realizes that she's most likely killed her. Sure she’s a jerk, but she doesn't want that.
“NOOOOOOO!!!!!” Nightshade cries and you whip out your Power Glove to use telekinesis when a web materializes under DT and she safely lands in it. Everypony looks up and sees...
“Spidermane?!” everypony shouts in surprise.
Nightshade apologizes to him, “I’m sorry, I didn't mean it! THANK YOU FOR SAVING HER!”
“Everypony gets one,” he replies.
"Wait a minute, where were you during the free-for-all riot!" you say, "Whatever happened to 'with great power comes great responsibility'?"
"Uh... Remember kids, don't do drugs!" Spidermane hastily says before swinging off.
“This changes nothing SpiderMane! I WILL GET PICTURES OF YOU!” shouts Diamond Tiara
“Actually my camera is out of film... sorry,” responds Featherweight.
“GGGGRRRRAAAAGGGGHHHH!!!!” she screams while you and everyone else just kind of sit there dazed at what just happened. Bulk Biceps walks up to you and says,
"Excuse me, you ever heard of a pegasus colt called Featherweight?"
"If you mean that little shutterbug I had to threaten and throw mud at, then yes." you reply obliviously.
"So, you admit to picking on my little bro?” he says with a dark undertone.
“i guess so. Wait-*pow*” and he hits you with a hook to the nards which knocks you back.
"Saw that coming." Flash comments.
"Yeah... he did deserve it." Applejack comments.
"Daddy! Falcon Kick!" *clang* "Ow!"
Nightshade kick not only hurts her, but it has no effect on Bulk.
“Wha...” she says as she rubs her hoof.
As Bulk picks up his smiling little brother, Featherweight, he says, “I got balls of steel.” before walking off.
You slowly try to get up, but your in too much pain to get very far. So you tell Nightshade from where your laying in a high pitched tone,
"Sweetie, why don't you go play with your friends. Daddy's just gonna... lay here for awhile. Okay."
Nightshade nods her head in understanding as she says,
"Okay Daddy."
"Hey Nightshade, want to help me make snacks for the Dragon Migration." Spike calls.
"Does a bear spit in the woods?!" Nightshade says excitedly as she runs off after the young Dragon.
A FEW HOURS LATER
As you walk back to the shack you mutter to yourself,
"Ow... that muscle-bound jerk must be compensating for something if he can punch that hard. Of course given he's most definitely on steroids he probably is-Ugh I can still barely feel them. Whatever... I am SO pranking that lug..."
Smiling as you remember the box of cereal in your Inventory AND the fact that Nightshade is learning a replication spell from Twilight, you open the door to the shack and say,
"Hey Nightshade, I'm ho-"
"Mr. Tennant, welcome back. We missed you."
You're cut off when you hear that barely-familiar female voice and see a figure step a holed hoof out of the shadows of the back of the shack. Your eyes widen in shock/terror as you can now see the figure before you.
"Chhhhhkkkkkkkkkcchhkkkkkchkkk"
Your eyes widen even more at the familiar changeling noise as you notice that to her left and right there are two other changelings, but they're too much in the dark to make out any details. But the lead changeling looks familiar with her pink mane, and you soon find out why as she says,
"Or should we say, Private 9001."
Your eyes widen in shock, as you can only think,
She... she's from my hive!
What do you do?
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Does it?
Also, for some reason i'm reminded of the homicidal Gary clones from Fallout 3.
I don't know why.
Changelings are bugs right? Whack them with a fly swatter
After the changelings leave, eat dinner of 1/2 Box of Whole-Wheat Crackers, 1 Can of Broccoli Cheese soup, 1 Instant Noodle Bowl, 1 Large Bag of "Sour Cream & Onion" Potato Chips, 4 Boxes of "Filly Scout Cookies", and some leftover creamed corn and a pitcher of carrot juice from the Apples (missing lunch and being the center of a free-for-all really builds up the appetite) and go to bed
Ask Nightshade to use replication spell on your "Orange-Frosted Buffo-Bombs" cereal (while telling her she can't have any because its harmful to ponies) and end up devouring the whole replicated-box for breakfast (even better than you remember...) while Nightshade tries to eat the "Lucky Oats" cereal, but his hindered by tummy-ache.
Nightshade asks you about the "Granny Smith/Doctor photo" and the "Granny Smith/Bowler Hat Pony photo" that she found in the Apple's attic.
Storm trooper accuracy for the Colt troopers lol
“Now come with us 9001,” says the shrouded female, “it’s time for us leave,”
“Uh yeah, no,” you say bluntly.
“Good, now let us…wait, what?” she stammers.
“Yeah, see the thing is I got work in the morning and I really need some shut eye.”
“B-but, you are coming with us,” she says.
“Enope,” you bluntly say.
She looks to the two others on the side and they shrug their shoulders.
She looks back at you and her eyes are hardened.
“Stop fooling around! You are done here! Come with us now! That is an order!”
You glare back. “Listen lady, I ain’t a part of your well oiled machine any more….bucking machines…I don’t take orders from anyone…aside from my boss, but she ain’t here right now.”
“In the name of the Queen, You Will Join Us!” she punctuates.
“Oh Buck the Queen!” you say harshly, to which all three of them gasp.
You see the Female’s eye twitching.
“Buck, the, Queen?” she says through gritted teeth.
“Yeah, Buck her and the Hive she rode in on.”
“Why you little blaspheming bast…”
“Hey, watch your filthy bucking mouth! I don’t need a Queen alright? I got enough Women already trying to run my life,” you snark. And it’s true, what with your stalkers, The Princesses, and Selena.
“Forfeit your mind!” she growls as her eyes glow green, and as she does, you feel something, a connection. The Hive Mind was a useful tool for the Army, but it used to have a bigger presence in you, what she is trying to force is weak and pitiful by comparison.
She looks taken aback as her eyes unglow. “How are you refusing the Mind Link?” she questions.
“I’ve got powerful friends who make sure my mind is my own,” you declare cryptically.
“What little there is to call your own that is,” snarks Selena.
“Hey!”
“B-but that’s impossible,” she says.
“Lady, I’ve found out that practically anything is possible when it comes to my life, now would you kindly get out of my shed?”
“No,” says the male on the right.
“We have matters to discuss with you,” says the one on the left.
“And we do it now,” they both say at the same time.
“Whoah, that’s creepy….also, still gonna go with, no.”
“Oh for,” the female facehooves and pulls her hood down, revealing her Pink Mane. She seems, familiar to you, but you can’t quite place it.
“Listen, you are going to come with us alright?”
“Ugh…Lady, I have had a stressful day. I have had my lunch stolen, had to act like a bad guy in a smelly cloak, inadvertently won and lost 300 bits, got punched in the nads by a Roid Raged Pegasus, and had to participate in another all out brawl all because of a bunch of misunderstandings between the most chaotic group of friends I’ve ever met, so I really, REALLY! Don’t have time for any of your Bullspit right now!”
She and the others look tensely at you, before she sighs.
“It never is easy with you is it?”
“I get that a lot. Now, if you wish to speak with me, let’s set up an appointment, how about after work tomorrow? I’ll be in a much better mood, and I won’t have the urge to squash you all for ambushing me.”
The two males snicker at this, but the Pink maned one actually looks like she is considering it.
“We weren’t ambushing you per se, we were…”
And she is cut off as you hear two yelps from outside.
The three changelings rush past you and out your door and you see that two of your traps have been set.
“A spike pit? Who the Buck has a Spike Pit in their front yard?!” yells another female voice. You see a cloaked figure hovering above your spike pit with the familiar changeling wing buzz.
“Dang, didn’t think about wings, note to self, add drop net in conjunction with pit,” you mutter.
Speaking of nets, you hear your spring trap go off and see a larger figure dangling by his hoof in the darkness.
“Oh you have got to be kidding me!” a deep voice sounds, and it isn’t Big Red.
You look at the Pink Maned one, “Not an ambush eh? I’ll talk to you guys tomorrow! Now would you kindly GET OFF MY LAWN!”
“No, we need to discuss this now!” says the female.
“Did you hear me, I said get off my lawn now!”
“You don’t want to mess with us cretin,” says the Big Hanging one.
“Not right now I don’t, but I’ll tell you this, you don’t get lost,” you pull out your glove and make flames appear, “I’ll burn a hole in your face, and then I’ll go inside and sleep like a baby. YOU CAN COUNT ON THAT…”
Everyling seems to growl or chuckle at that, but the Pink one actually looks hectic.
“Fine! We’ll see you tomorrow 9001, YOU can count on that.”
They then free their comrades and Buzz off (Pun intended)
You then go inside and pass out.
The next day you wake up and Night Shade doesn’t feel very well.
“My Tummy hurts daddy, and eating didn’t make it better…” she whines.
“Oh don’t worry baby, daddy will help you, here, drink this,” you hand her a Ginger ale.
You let AJ know about Nightshade and she gives you the day off to take her to the Doctor.
You are told that it’ll be about an hour as they run tests, so you go to get some food for her for when she feels better.
When you get back, you notice the Kid Doctor picking up Nightshade and carrying her out the front door. You walk back inside and see the real doctor knocked out, with a note on him that says.
“Follow”
“OH YOU BUCKING MOTHER BUCKERS!!!” both you and Selena cry at the same time.
You rush out the door and see the “Kid Doctor” waving, before galloping into town.
“GET HIM! QUICKLY! SAVE MY BABY!” Selena shouts.
“I was planning on it!” you yell back.
“GET BACK HERE YOU BUCKING BUG!”
“UNLEASH ME!” Selena shouts.
“I can’t, there are too many witnesses, and also, I might hurt Nightshade if I go full power!”
“I…FINE, JUST GET THAT MONSTER BEFORE IT’S TOO LATE!!!,” she says in panic and anger.
You chase the Chageling, who keeps taking on different disguises as you have a Benny Hill type chase through the town.
Eventually Flash flies along side you.
“Tennant Bro, what’s going on?” he asks.
“A CHANGELING HAS NIGHTSHADE!” you yell back.
His eyes widen, “A CHANGELING? But I thought that was a prank,”
“Well it’s not a very good one is it!” you yell back.
Flash being the ever cool guy that he is, decides to help you.
“EVERYPONY! CHANGELINGS! CHANGELINGS ARE KIDNAPPING CHILDREN!!!” he yells.
This causes everypony to start panicking in the streets, and makes it more difficult to run.
“Huh, thought that would help,” mutters Flash.
The two of you weave in and out of panicking ponies, and are joined by Lyra and Octavia in chasing the Changeling.
“Don’t worry Tennant, we’ll catch this slimy Bug.”
“And we will get your daughter back!” says Octavia.
“Thanks guys, Flash, where are the Deadly 6? We could use their changeling hunting skills!”
“Umm…not too sure, said they were going dragon watching or something,”
“Dragon watch…there he is!” you shout as you spot him darting into an alley way.
You eventually get more Villagers joining your group as they somehow get pitchforks and torches.
“Huh, weird being part of one of these things for once,” you think to yourself.
Eventually you run towards the Everfree border and you don’t notice as about a thousand dragons blanket the sky.
Many of the Villagers notice, and they take cover to avoid dragon fire, while others watch in awe.
You are too determined to look though as you continue into the Everfree.
Flash and some of the others call after you, but do not follow as it is too dangerous with the dragons around.
Bugze used Sand Attack!
Bugze Ran Away!
And over 9000 words in this chapter.
You're doing it right.
You slowly back into the door, only to run into a door.
"What's the matter?"
You definitely do not want to die mr lay eggs in brains today.
*cough* "So.. what..ss going on?" you slur.
"...Are you drunk?"
"I am merely OH MA CHEESE PUFFS proccesing the fact that there is a ch... agg.."
*thump*
"...oh dear."
SHE'S FROM THE HIVE SHE WANTS TO TAKE NIGHTSHADE AWAY PANIC!!!!!
I did not get to see the premiere (
) because reasons. But I was surprised by the ending of this chapter.
Ask the changelings what they are doing here and what their plans are, with you as well as the rest of the world.
If they try to force you to rejoin them, and if they threaten you with bodily harm, send them flying, like you did with the Royal Guard. Just make sure not to do it somewhere that others can see you doing it, otherwise, they could transform into normal ponies and make it seem like your alias (Tennant, in other words) is guilty of assault.
I laughed at the ending of this episode, and haven't watched the Season 5 premiere.
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5841245 Well, there was the Hearts & Hooves former loveinterest of Bugze,
I was thinking maybe the changeling with the pink mane was that?
Since she seems to be the daughter of the queen, and the queens have hair for sure.
-----
"What, how, when did you get in?", you ask them, "And how did you find out?"
The changeling with the pink mane looks at you in a strange way, before saying: "We entered through the frontdoor, and did so an hour ago. And please, I would never forget you."
"But you... what?", you reply confused.
One of the other changelings says: "Let me explain things, [Insert Name here(maybe if the changeling with the pink mane comes again and again, we could vote about her name)].", steps into the light, causing you to remember him: "We helped you back in Fillydelphia. You were thought to be dead after so long, but our hive was... is still endangered. Currently we are searching all the other leftover changelings in disguise, to rebuild our hive. In this time of need, we need everyling."
You look over the speaker, having the warrior haircut, but the scar beneath his eye tell you who he is:
"...and then they always laughed about me...", you come back to reality.
The scarred sees the pink maned giving him the stink look, seemingly remembering what I was talking about, causing him to tell you: "Hey, look, I was a larva back then. I'm really, really sorry for what happened back then, but I... WE need you now more than ever. And hey, if you would have been such a failure, when how could you have become the Hooded Offender?" He laughed weakly, not improving your or anyone elses mood.
You sigh, before telling them: "Look, I don't want to talk about this today..."
-----
And pleeeaaase have the pink-maned try to flirt with Bugze throughout the chapters (and maybe future appearances), and him... us either not catching it, or wondering why (until it gets explained sometime).
My reaction to the end of this chapter? "The Ride Never Ends,"
And My Reaction to the Season 5 Premiere?
First Half
Meanwhile, in the Hall of Friendship!
Yes listen to Pinkie, this town is bucked up, burn it! BURN IT WITH FIRE!
ONE OF US! ONE OF US!
FLUTTERSHY, STOP BEING THE FIRST IN LINE TO DRINK THE KOOLAID!
Heh that Sugar Belle is kind of funny, and Poor Pinkie with the muffins LOL
DEAR GOD THIS IS CREEPY!
Second Half
HOLY CRAP THIS GOT DARK!
That was a hilarious Pinkie line about the Laughs.
FLUTTERSHY! AVENGE US! AVENGE US!!!
All animals are Equal, but some are more equal than others...what a bitch!
YOU LET HER GET AWAY?!!!!
So ya, amazing episode, we just need to kill Glimmer before Animal Farm is recreated and the Pigs take over!
private 9001...over 9000 joke?
Still needs to get laid.
"At last, we see again, agent 9001" Comment the other changeling as he look to Bugzee
"Errr... You are in the wrong barn, the changeling you search is in Sweet Pear Acres" Comment Bugzee as he try to get the changeling leave
"You are not going to fool me Agent 9001... I have been watching you for very long time... Or maybe it could be best to say, Hooded Offender?" Ask the changeling
"Errr... I'm not the Changelling you are searching?" Ask Bugzee as he pass a hoof in front of him, hoping that a Jedi Power activate
"I see you are still a little slow to see what happen around you, so I will put it simple so that you know what is happening... The hive is coming agent 9001, we are regrouping" Comment the Changeling
"And why do you think I want to come back? I have friends here, real friends that help me and support me, I have a house and a daughter... You want me? Try it!" Say Bugzee as he get ready to fight
"Oh no... I think you are thinking it wrong... We don't want you to join the hive... Some of us have been thinking, after Chrysalis left, searching for clues of where could she be, or what to do... Believe it or not, your name appeared sometimes. No... What we want is not just a simple soldier, we want you as our king, as a replacement until the queen return" Say the changeling looking to him
"Wait... What? Are you saying you want me as the king? Why?" Ask Bugzee
"Some of us want you, because you are powerfull, you have connections with the Elements of Harmony, one princess and above all that, you leave with our own Princess... Having one of the champions that defeated Discord is also a bonus" Explained the changeling
"How do you know all that?" Ask Bugzee
"Ohhh, Agent 9001, remember what we are, what you are, we know everything, for example in this moment in Canterlot, Celestia is bathing and playing with a toy duck and meanwhile Luna is reading one of the comics that tell your adventures, at the same time Cadence and Shining Armor seem to have been problems in their happy lives, and it's only the begin... Listen to our offer Agent 9001, become the new king" Say the changeling
Bugzee look seriously at the changeling and begin to think about the offer, when the changeling look at him.
"Think about it, agent 9001, you will be king, and your daughter our Princess... That could give both of you advantage..." Comment before leaving but Bugzee stop it.
"Wait... Don't put my daughter in this!" Say Bugzee looking to the changeling
"I'm sorry but she already is, you are someone that could become the king, some of us want you, but others want to become the king, a couple know they could not touch you, but your daughter is another thing..." Comment the changeling leaving
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I liked the begin of the season 5... Too bad the bad one could not brainwash them a little more.
....
I was thinking in add a little of the hive and Nightshade P.O.V, but I'm not sure if put it now or put it next week. Mainly to suggest that Chrysalis only want to meet Nigthshade because is Bugzee daughter and her niece. But because that involve other changelings and Chrysalis I was not sure if put it.
"You have a duty to your hive, drone! Don't you dare turn back on your pride!"
Persistent, they are. You suppose you have to satisfy them with at least so kind of response, if only to make them leave, however temporarily.
"Pride?" you scoff, "There's no pride in a hive that doesn't take after its own, especially to a 'failure' like me, isn't that right?" You glare at your haunting ghosts of your past.
They frown. At least they have the decency to recognize the problem here.
"Besides," you continue, "I'm oh so happy in this little ol' shack here. And there's nothing you can do about it!"
"No."
Confused by the bluntness, you raise a brow at her. "Huh?"
"You will come back," she said in confidence. "Do you know what makes us a Hivemind?"
"Uhm..." You put hoof on your chin, thinking. "Mind control?" You never really payed attention to social studies. And you are darn glad about that, too. Especially now.
She faced hoof, and then stare down at you with pink, pupiless eyes. "No, instinct. It's instinct that tells us who is in the higher power, what our role is, and what purpose and virtue we represent. Our blood permits— no, drives our union. You can't simply be disconnected from the Hivemind. It's in your genes since the moment you were born! You'll come back to us, whether you like it or not!"
"Aaaand that's bullspit!" you shouted. "It doesn't apply to me!"
Flabbergasted, the Pink-Maned one said, "What?!"
"I'm a changeling, yeah, that's true, but I'm also part pony! You could blame my Grandbuggy for that. So, hah!" you mocked childishly. "Your argument is invalid!"
She growled. "That old bug of a fool?!" she yells. "If weren't for how strong you were, we would've left you alone just by the tainted blood you contain, drone. You're lucky enough we made an exception."
You rolled your eyes so hard that the Changelings became shocked at such uncanny behavior from a drone such as yourself. "Too bad I don't believe in being 'lucky' anymore. Now, get out of my shack."
(5841245 continuing from chase)
When things got dark in the Everfree forest, the Kid Doctor went back to changeling form, becoming camouflage to the dark. Suddenly, as you went deeper, everything got darker and harder to see. It is at one moment where you lost sight of them in dark foliage of the Everfree forest that you began to get panic-y and frustrated.
"Darn it! Where the hay are they?!"
You serve your head around as you ran. You couldn't see any sign of movement. Eventually, you got lost in the middle of nowhere.
"Guaah! I don't have time to get lost! Selena, can you pinpoint Nightshade?"
"I would if I could! She's not asleep for it, though!"
Snap!
Out of frustration, you punch a tree to its death, toppling it from the trunk down. "You are all so dead!" you yelled to the darkness around you, eyes bright in orange. You are all so bucking dead!"
Then, you hear a voice.
"Eheheeh... I see you've got yourself into a bind." Your darkside, you're shadow!
"Oh, come on!" you cry out. "I don't want to deal with you right now."
"Tch." Why that little...! "For a born changeling, you are a terrible one. Pathetic, you can't even use the senses that's instilled into you!"
Senses? That triggers a memory. About Scouting. Detecting. Finding. Tracking—Grandbuggy!
Flash back!
"Alright, @#$%, you wanna know how I get all the ladies?"
"Erm, no, Grandbuggy, I don't wanna kno—"
"It all starts in here," he pointed a hoof to where the mind is. "Mares are a delicate and complicated bunch. You gotta know what goes in their mind to even earn a single base. If you don't, then they'll turn into Brain Ninjas and assassinate your sanity into pieces. And I speak from experience."
"But, Grandbuggy, I—!"
"So here's what you must understand! When you first meet a pony, some sort of bond forms! You'll know when you see it, trust me. It's in you changeling blood! You could call it friendship, acknowledgement, hay, maybe love at first sight, if you know what I mean..." He wraggled his brows.
"Uhm, actually I don't—"
"Well, you'll soon know!" he interrupts. "Whenever there's a bond, take it, and keep it close. And when you got a tight hold into it...
Out of Flashback!
"...Find the string, and home in on it; watch it intently..." you mutter, eyes aglow. Instead, it is at bright blue color. You indeed, found this 'string', but it was lost into the distance around you. "Pull it into a loving hug, and feel the tug..."
The 'tug' was like a press into your mind, and it pulls you towards a direction. However, it was still too vague. Thankfully, you are still not done.
"Stare into the eyes as it stares back..." A familiar presence washes across you from that direction, as though eyes were on you. You stare back. "...and you then kiss the mare!"
Your daddy senses are a tinglin'. All at once, you felt it: your daughters emotions! Fear and hope. Scared. Your baby girl is afraid!
"Nightshade! I'm coming! Daddy is coming to the rescue!"
----
Er Mah Gerd! Changelings! With Pink! Holy crap, you could remember all the pink like it was from yesterday! And I'm talking about more than "Canterlot Wedding" Pink!
My reaction to the season premiere? I say it didn't pull back its snideness! Holy crap, that stuff was foreboding and dark compared to the cheesiness we are all used too! Then again... we kinda have a weird need for dark and creepy stuff in this fandom, as history had spoken for us.
5841245
During the chase, many Ponyvillians think that this is a "Crying Wolf" scenario (the fact that you just exposed yourself as a prankster AND the fact that The Foal Free Press has been exposed as tabloid journalism leads to many of them thinking this is just a changeling-themed prank)
The changelings play a form of "keep-away" with Nightshade where they constantly join, transform, fly, split up, etc. which makes it more difficult to chase them even with the assistance of your friends, (Flash, Comic Book Joe), stalkers (Aloe, Octavia, Vinyl), and Nightshade's friends/stalkers (Button Mash, Rumble, Pip).
NOTE: Mane 6 unavailable due to being in a trench on the outskirts of town for the Great Dragon Migration
Punt Angel Bunny at one of the changelings (yes, he's Fluttershy's pet rabbit, but something tells you he REALLY deserves it... Maybe the "Kill the Waifu Stealer" voices found a new target?)
As you chase the changelings into the Everfree,
There! We're out of that accursed town! NOW UNLEASH ME!!! Selena yells,
Alrigh- you mentally reply, but are interrupted by hearing several pony voices behind you.
At this, you still refuse to go Nightmare Cloak out of fear of hurting them and Nightshade and exposing you, but Selena's "mama bear" instincts have enough of your excuses so she takes direct control and uses a FUS RO DAH to blast the ponies back.
5844244
These Changelings don't know where Queen Chrysalis is. They've been lost from the Hive since the wedding and also missed out on Chrysalis's return (as explained in Episode 64: EXTRA! EXTRA! READ ALL ABOUT IT! NEW PLOT ELEMENTS AHOOF!):
5844905 I edited, and think the idea of suggest Bugzee as the king, the problem is to put it together with others