Episode 50: Join The Light Side Coco... We Have Cake! (Die Horde Part 2)
Intro:
So you are once again tied down. You start trying to get out when you hear a strange voice in your head. Bugze used Struggle....It's not very effective. Choosing to ignore that, you start to think rationally.
Ok. let's see here. I'm tied up... again.... *sigh* why do I keep having this happen to me? It's almost as bad as winding up in the Everfree....Almost.
Selena: Why don't you get that mare to get you out?
Bugze: Oh yeah. How could I forget she was here? She's right in front of me.
As you open your to say something... you suddenly forget what you were doing. Shrugging it off, you start to struggle against your chains and make no progress, but suddenly stop as a strange voice in your head says,
Bugze used Struggle... It's not very effective.
Choosing to ignore that, you start to think rationally.
Ok. let's see here. I'm tied up... again. *sigh* Why do things like this keep happening to me? It's almost as bad as winding up in the Everfree... Almost.
Why don't you get that mare to get you out?
You look in front of you in surprise to see that Coco is indeed in front of you giving you a confused look. You get the feeling to facehoof yourself, but can't because of these stupid chains as you then think in annoyance,
Oh yeah... How could I forget she was here? She's right in front of me!
With that thought you ask,
Coco blushes as she said Flag Burner told her to watch over you and do anything necessary to help regain your memory. She then takes her cloak off and starts snuggling against you...
*spurt*
"Hey uh... Coco was it? Mind letting me outta these chains? I've got a crazy psycho who's Tartarus-bent on bringing war to Equestria to pound some sense into and make cry for his mommy."
You then give her a innocent smile, which just causes her to look at you strangely before saying,
"I'm sorry my lord, but Master Flag Burner has given me strict instructions to watch over you."
She then blushes intensely and says with a stutter,
"H-he also to-told me to do any-anything necessary to he-help you re-regain your... me-memory."
What in the name of Luna does she mean by-Holy...
Coco then begins to... take off her cloak?
*spurt*
Blood shouts out of your nose as her cloak hits the ground and you now see Coco without her cloak on.
Wait, why am I aroused by this? Sure, she's cute, but ponies normally don't wear cloth-
Your thoughts are interrupted when Coco climbs onto your cot, wraps her arms around you, and starts to... snuggle? You try to keep a straight face while blood gushes out of your nose as you think,
Save it for marriage- She smells nice, NO! Save it for marriage. Save it for- Luna, she feels soooo goo- GAH! Need distractions, NOW! Coco is cute, but she doesn't have Octavia's eyes or Vinyl's shapely flanks or Applejack's well-toned legs... or Rainbow Dash's athletic build... or Aloe's oil-covered nubile body... And she definitely doesn't feel as good or look as supermodel-sexy as Flutters- NO! BAD BUG!!!
With that in mind, you reluctantly say,
"Uh... Coco, not that I'm not enjoying this, but could you give me a teeny-tiny amount of space?"
"Ok..." Coco says dreamily as she stops snuggling. With her off you say,
“Ok, now take a few steps back cause I'm gonna wreck it!”
“You can’t break those cuffs” Coco tells you as she climbs off your cot and takes a few steps back, but you begin squirming around, groaning,
“Grrrraaaaagghhhh!!!!”
And nothing happens, aside from your limbs hurting.
Hey, give me some help here, I need some nightmare fuel to get out! you mentally shout to Selena
As you wish. she says before an image of Granny Smith and your Grandbuggy making out appears in your mind.
“OH DEAR LUNA WHY!!!” you scream out loud, startling Coco.
You said you wanted 'Nightmare fuel', so I obliged.
Not like that! I need the cloak and tails!
I know what you meant, but I am being suppressed at the moment by some strange force so I cannot unleash it.
What? Then why did you…
I'm still punishing you for those perverted thoughts you had in response to the (admittedly adorable) mare's promiscuity and for being so stupid as to get us into this mess!
Okay, I’m sorry! Yeesh, can we move on! We’re kind of in danger here!
No, we are merely in distress. If they wanted you dead, they would have killed you already. Just stand ready, wait for your opportunity, and stop thrashing around. You shall dislocate your shoulder otherwise. she chides.
You stop thrashing and catch your breath,
“Um... I told you you couldn't. These are reinforced, magic-dampening manacles so only the key can open them.” Coco says matter of factly before she climbs back on and continues snuggling you.
This again?- Luna, does she feel good- GAH!
Having enough of this you shout,
"Stop it!"
Coco stops snuggling with you and looks at you in confusion (with a crimson red face) and asks,
"Stop wh-what?"
You give her a cold glare and say,
"While I honestly don't mind the snuggling and you are really cute..."
She blushes even redder at this complement as you continue,
"You don't need to do this! Is this what you want?! To be nothing but a madpony's pawn?! Think Coco! He's going to kill millions! All just because he thinks it's the right bucking thing to do for my vision! It's not my vision Coco! It's bucking not! I don't want millions of ponies dead in my name! I don't want Solar Flank off the throne!"
Maybe some new rules and actually punishing ponies for doing idiotic things like hypnotizing a whole town *coughTwilightcough*, but I digress. you mentally comment as you continue,
"All I want is to protect those who can't protect themselves. To be the big guy who stands up for the little guys! To be the guy who wipes out the darkness in others hearts and wipes out all evil! I'm the Hooded Bucking Offender, and I will-"
Sadly your epic speech is cut short when...
A needle is jabbed into your neck,
"What are you doing?!" Coco exclaims in alarm.
"Flag Burner's orders," a deep voice says, "From now on, nopony talks to the prisoner until he does."
"A necessary precaution, my dear Coco," Flag Burner says as he steps into the cell, "Who knows how many more lies the Solar Tyrant has implanted in his head? Leave us."
Coco chews her lip in hesitation...
"NOW!" Flag Burner roars causing Coco to flinch in fear before she jumps off your cot and she and the stallion leave.
You try to speak, but the drug has you in a stupor as Flag Burner grins with a malicious glint in his eye,
"It will wear off soon enough. Don't worry, I'll send Coco back in when I'm through."
Monologue time... Selena comments.
Aghgblurgh... tchalal... batuset
That... is quite the drug they have.
Euth(*)
Flag Burner begins to pace beside your cot as he rants,
"You are the true Offender. I can't deny that. I also don't actually think you're brainwashed. From my experience, those guys usually have a resistance for drugs."
He stops by your head.
"So how do I explain what I just saw? What I just heard? The false goddess's lapdogs think of you as a friend. They were willing to drop their business in Ponyville and follow you here on a whim."
The malice in his eyes grows into a fire.
"Are you their friend? Have you betrayed yourself? Maybe you're just tricking them. Maybe they don't know your true name. I am familiar with deception, but that doesn't change what you said! YOU DON'T WANT REVOLUTION! Do you understand what that means? I don't think you do!"
He grabs your head and glares into your face,
"You don't understand what this means! You don't understand what's at stake! I need you! I- YOU CAN'T BACK OUT NOW!"
After a few moments of heavy breathing after that rant, his face cracks into a smile, and he gives a joyless laugh,
"You think I'm insane, don't you? That's why you came here. That's why you thought you could stop me. You know what you're thinking; 'Flag Burner is a dangerous fool.' 'Flag Burner is nothing but a bloody terrorist.' 'Flag Burner is a nopony.'"
He knof wong... you druggedly mentally comment as he shakes his head,
"I was going to become you. That's why I brought Coco into the fold. She was going to make me an identical cloak, and the Hooded Offender would make his glorious return to make goddesses bleed! And now here you are."
He grins maniacally.
"You might think I'm nothing but a warmongering anarchist, but I assure you, I so much more than that! A revolution needs a symbol so I am giving you one last chance to be that symbol. If you refuse, I will leave you alone and forgotten here while I wear that cloak in your place!"
He leans in and growls through clenched teeth,
"Do. Not. Doubt me."
After that threat (which compared to some of the other threats you've had, wasn't much... word wise anyway as tone-wise you wanted to wet your cloak) your eyes glow in anger as the drug somehow leaves your system as you shout,
You’ve had enough of this kind of talk, so you decide to lay into him.
“Betrayed Myself?! What kind of idiot are you? I never wanted a freaking war, NEVER! So what you’re really asking me to say is that I haven’t betrayed YOU and your stupid cause. Well guess what, I’m not on your side. Now get me out of here and stop all this nonsense before I make you pay!”
Your eyes glow in anger as you finish that statement.
*snap*
“Betrayed Myself?! What kind of an idiot are you? I never wanted a freaking war, NEVER! So what you’re really asking me to say is that I haven’t betrayed YOU! Well guess what, I’m not and never will be on your side! Now get me out of here and stop all this nonsense before I crush your eyeballs and paint this city with the juices!”
Flag Burner looks at you in what looks like loss before his features grow grim,
“That’s not what I wanted you to say…” he says flatly.
“Well too bad Burny, but that’s what I got to sa-gragh!” you are cut short when he places his arm across your throat and presses down.
His facial expression hasn't changed, but his eyes are burning with fury as he looks into yours, and it is terrifying.
“This is not how it was supposed to go…” he says again in his monotone.
You can’t reply as he's choking you, but you can still breathe, so you guess he’s making a point.
“You were supposed to lead us... to stand with us as we changed the world...” he then scowls at you, “You weren't supposed to grow weak.”
“mm... nah... wea...” you stutter through chokes,
“You've been indoctrinated... I don’t know how or why, but her lapdogs have gotten to you. The mares who have done nothing but bring you Tartarus, and you embrace them as friends...”
“Bu…”
“You’re still labeled as 'Public Enemy Number One', but I guess that’s for show... to root The true Horde out because we don’t know you've been Harmonized…” he leans closer to you, “But it won’t work. We’re still going to carry on... with or without you.”
He begins applying a little more pressure on your throat causing you to gag more.
“Originally, I was going to impersonate you as we carried out our plan and then you would come to us and I would relinquish control to you...” he then leans forward, to the point where his snout is almost touching yours, “But it seems I have to take up the mantle now.”
Your eyes grow orange as you begin to pass out, but then he releases you. You gasp in much needed air and cough as he sits back,
“The Hooded Offender must carry on his message, The False Goddess must fall!” he proclaims to you, “So I’ll carry on your work, in honor of who you once were.”
“You... bucking... idiot...” you growl, “I’m not indoctrinated, I’m myself... and If you carry on, the blood that’s going to be shed is yours,” you growl at him as your eyes glow.
“Your orange eyes aren't so horrifying once you've seen blue behind them” he says causing you to look at him in surprise.
“I don’t know what the rest of you looks like, and for the sake of who you once were, I won’t pry,” he continues, “but your true blue eyes show how weak you've grown... and there’s no room for weakness on the battlefield.”
He then stands up,
“I have work to do... and I’m sorry, but for the sake of us all, you must be left behind...”
He walks over to the door.
“Goodbye Offender... your legacy will live on.”
“You can't just leave me here!” you shout.
“We both know that I must...” he says, “By the end of tonight, the message will have spread, and The Horde will grow stronger, and those who stand in our way will be dealt with... even if that means pruning our own weak...”
You imagine the rest of the Horde in Ponyville, in Canterlot, and everywhere else that aren't radical... what he would do to them.
“I’m going stop you you Bucking Psychopath! I swear it!” you shout.
You can’t stop the future my dear Fallen Offender…this is what needs to happen” he monotones, “I've seen the writing on the wall, there is no other way… THE NIGHTMARE COMES."
“What... y-you’ve seen it too?” you ask in surprise.
He ignores you,
"By the time I'm through, there won't be a weak pathetic Equestria, but the full might of The Horde Nation...”
He then dons a cloak that looks exactly like yours (you can’t even see his face).
“With the Hooded Offender himself at the lead.”
He then walks out the door leaving you alone in the darkness.
“WAIT! DON’T GO! WHAT DO THE WORDS MEAN?! WHAT DO THEY MEAN?!” you roar in the Royal Canterlot Voice.
You begin thrashing repeatedly in anger. You shout every obscenity you know, and swear vengeance upon all those who
have wronged you. You then tire yourself out and weep as you fear you’ll never see Nightshade again. What you don't know, is that Coco is peeking into your room as you wail, Nightmare Cloak particles flying off you as you scream in anger (and in the RCV),
"YOU BUCKING $%#$#! I'M GONNA RIP YOUR BUCKING THROAT OUT! YOU HEAR ME! YOU WON'T LIVE TO SEE THE BUCKING SUN SHINE! WHEN I GET OUT OF HERE YOUR GONNA WISH YOU HAD COMMON SENSE TO LISTEN TO ME!"
As your anger builds, the Nightmare cloak begins to form. Coco squeaks in fear as you continue to shout,
"THAT GOES FOR ALL OF YOU IN THIS BLOODY HORDE! YOU ALL BETTER LEAVE NOW OR I'LL BUCKING KILL YOU ALL! YOU ALL ARE JUST STUPID LISTENING TO THIS IDIOT! YOU ALL WANT TO DIE! YOU ALL WANT TO HAVE MILLIONS OF PONIES BLOOD ON YOUR HOOVES! THEN KEEP LISTENING TO THIS BUCKING IDIOT! NOLING WILL BE SAFE WHEN I'M BUCKING FREE!"
Your one tail form completely formed as your tail swings around widely, knocking loose dozens of bricks. You begin to cry tears, and Coco gasps at this, as you yell,
"BUCK YOU LADY LUCK! THIS IS ALL YOUR BUCKING FAULT! YOU AND BUCKING DISCORD! I HOPE YOUR BOTH HAPPY, BECAUSE YOUR BOTH GONNA HAVE MILLIONS ON DEAD PONIES ON YOUR HANDS! YOU HEAR ME! I'LL KILL YOU BOTH AFTER I RIP FLAG BURNER'S HEART OUT!"
You suddenly become exhausted as the cloak fades, and you begin to cry even more as you whisper in pain,
"Please... someling... anyling... help me stop him... don't let him do it. I don't want anyling to die. I never wanted this. Doctor... Derpy... Fluttershy... The true Horde... the Bucking Deadly Five... Zecora... Luna... I'm sorry."
You begin to close your eyes as you say in a whisper,
I've failed again. The drone screw-up failed again- huh... Chrysalis?
And with that, you faint and the last thing you see is a very confused, very guilty Coco coming towards you saying with uncertainly,
"D-Don't worry... I'll be right h-here."
DREAMSCAPE
You see Selena in front of you in her Nightmare Moon armor before she says,
“Do not give up... We can’t let that fool win.”
“It’s no use... I've lost...” you say downtrodden.
*smack*
She slaps you upside the head and says,
“You cannot give up! This fool will surely not cease until he's leg-deep in blood!”
“Sounds like everything you've ever wanted, your great revolution is coming true…” you mumble.
She looks aghast at that,
“I… well…” she sighs, “Look, if I ever succeed, it won’t be because of some fool with radical notions of belief, it will be because I have personal issues with the False Goddesses who have wronged me...”
“Oh, so now you care about innocents?” you cynically comment,
“If this anarchist gets his way, I won't have ANY subjects to rule over. Also, if this fool ever fights the Element Bearers, there is a chance Nightshade will be around, and I will not have her harmed in your name.”
“But I can’t do much strapped to this bed now can I?”
“No... but perhaps there is something I can do...” she says thoughtfully.
“What?”
“That Mare you were speaking to, she was conflicted, perhaps she will ally with us.”
“Coco? How are we going to get her here?”
“I sense she is near... and asleep... we can call for her to help.”
“Wait, how?”
“Through Dream Walking,” she replies.
“Wait, you can do that now?”
“Ever since Nightshade and Luna showed up, I began meditating upon my own abilities. It appears I can do it as well, but only over a short distance since I have no body of my own. Fortunately, the, admittedly adorable, strumpet took pity on your troubles, climbed atop you, and fell asleep snuggling you.”
"Really? Aw Luna! Why'd I have to go night-night before that!"
Selena rolls her eyes in annoyance, but is happy some of your old Buggy self is showing.
"Wait, I thought your power was being suppressed?" you ask in confusion
"For the physical world it is, but not from within here" she replies.
“Well hurry up then!”
“Be patient and still... this will require concentration... also, as she is still conflicted, I am going to convince her the only way I know how.”
“And what’s that?” you ask.
“With a Nightmare...” she says as she closes her eyes.
Selena enters into Coco’s dreamscape and you can see through her eyes. You see it is a happy place full of clothing and runways, but the landscape suddenly warps into fire and brimstone and death, scaring Coco as signs saying “Long Live the Horde” and “Down with the Tyrant” blanket the ground.
“Change your ways Coco Pommel, or this is what will come to pass” Selena says in your voice.
You are then pulled back into your own dreamscape as you guess she’s woken up,
“That was brutal...” you say in slight fear.
“Yes, I know, twas the point.” Selena replies.
“Now what?’
“We wait and see if it worked.”
You are then shook awake in the real world by Coco who has freed you with the key... she looks really nervous and scared as she quakes,
I-I-I’m... s-s-s-s-sorry…”
You silently hug her while giving her a warm smile as you say,
"It's okay now, calm down. Your doing good helping me okay? Your gonna stop this nut job with me right?"
You stop the hug as Coco gives you a nervous smile and says,
"Ya... ya."
You smile before asking,
You also ask Coco what FB's plan is, but she says this building was merely a "Diversion Base" that is meant to distract the Royal Guard and that not even she knows Flag Burner's true plans, but she does know that Flag Burner orchestrated the "accident" of the Fillydelphia Royal Guard captain...
"So, what's Flaming Nut's plan and what's this place like?"
Coco looks at you in confusion at your nickname for Flag Burner before saying,
"Well, this base is just a diversion building to help distract the Royal Guard if they ever get suspicious of your- I mean, their activities."
She then puts on a thinking face before saying,
"And I don't know what his big plan is, but what I do know that it's gonna happen sometime during the traditional Hearth's Warming Eve Hoofball game."
You look at her wide eyed before thinking in panic,
Shaking your head of those thoughts, you ask
"Has Flame Nut done anything... drastic already in the city already?"
Coco gets a dark and guilty look before saying,
"Well... Flag Burner did orchestrate the "accident" of the Fillydelphia Royal Guard captain so that he could lure in a bigger target..."
Your eyes glow orange as you ask,
"What kind of... 'accident'?"
Coco looks down in sadness,
"A... deadly one... I thought it was a genuine accident until I learned about that a few minutes ago..."
*SMASH*
The table next to you is suddenly smashed in half as you introduced your hoof to it. You glare hatefully at the door where Flag Burner left and say in a cold serious tone,
"What was the captain's name?"
Coco looks at you fearfully before stammering,
"H-his wh-"
"HIS NAME!!!" you roar in the RCV causing Coco to stammer,
"I-Iron Shield. His name was Iron Shield."
"Did he have a family?"
"Ye...yes. A wife and a little filly."
Your glare intensifies as you hear Selena say in horror in your mind,
What... what has he done?
You sigh in sadness before you tell Coco,
"I'll need to make a formal apology to his family... after I carve his name into Flag Burner's scalp. Who's the new captain?"
"There's no new captain yet, but Canterlot sent down their top Captain and his right-hoof stallion."
"Who?"
"A Prince Shinning Armor and Lieutenant Flash Sentry."
*ding*
Of bucking course! They had to be here for this...!
With a sigh you say,
When you want to leave, she insists on staying behind so to make sure she won't get into any trouble with the rest of the Horde, you two go back to the cell and stage the scene to make it look like you literally broke out by breaking the shackles, cot, and door hinges and then laying Coco in a corner in the room before knocking her out with the Luna Plushie
Luckily, you still have your Potion Sash on, so you plant a fuse bomb on the locked main door to blast it open (2 Fuse Bombs remaining)... only for that to be the distraction as you "Psycho Crusher" out a window and find that you are in/at...
"Well, I think it's time for us to make our exit."
Coco shakes her head before saying,
"Just you sir, I'm gonna stay behind to keep watch. Tell you what's happening and all that."
You sigh and say,
"If you say so, now here's the plan."
And with that you lean in and whisper to her the plan...
ONE PLAN LATER
*ka-boom shatter*
As soon as your hooves hit the ground you take off galloping. You don't look behind you, you just gallop past a street sign, and memorize it for later (in case you were wondering what the plan was, it involved staging the cell to make it look like you literally busted out and KOed Coco, retrieved the Inventory, and rolled a Fuse Bomb (2 Fuse Bombs remaining) under the pool table as a distraction while you "Psycho Crusher" out of the closest window).
After you've galloped for quite a while, you start to slow down and mentally tell Selena,
Okay here's the plan; I'm going to find Shining and convince him I'm on his side... somehow. Then I'm gonna tell him Flaming Nut's plan to strike during that Hoofball game on Hearths Warming Eve. Then we'll go back to that street and collect any evidence we can find. Then we'll set up a trap at the game, capture Flag, carve Iron Shield's name into his scalp, then I'll find Iron Shield's family and apologies for what happened. Then we'll head back to Ponyville, buy a new outfit, and then book it back to Appleloosa with Nightshade before anyling will notice... Somehow. The Doctor can watch over the bucking town himself if he's that desperate.
...That is ALOT of "then"s and "somehow"s. Could you repeat that, but more intelligently?
You're about to respond...
*WHAM*
When you slam right into somepony. After shaking away the birds you see...
A familiar orange pegasus guard with a blue mane.
Okay... This is could either be really good or really bad...
Outro:
What do you do?
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Boop Flash on the nose -boop- then book it down the nearest alleyway.
Bugzee is galloping the streets, as he wants to stop Flag Burner, when he stop looking to a shop called 'Quills and Sofas' and look the shop confused
"What a strange coincidence..." Mutter Bugzee
Just then he have a idea and enter the shop, when the other ponies begin to panic, you take one of the quill and write to Santa Hooves
Dear Santa Hooves
This year I was a good Changeling, and for heart warming day I want to ask that you protect the ponies and Celestia from Flag Burner plan.
Signed:
Bugzee
P.S: If you could also do a little about Lady Luck it could be great
After that he put it in a mail box and continue to the location of Flag Burner
"Really? Santa Hooves?" Ask Selena
"What's the problem?" Ask Bugzee in the mind
"Santa Hooves is a myth... " Say Selena
"What? but... That's impossible! many ponies see Santa Hooves every year" Comment Bugze
"In the Moon, both Luna and I, asked every year for a friend, someone that could understand us or help us, that could understand the beauty of the night, but nopony appeared" Say Selena sad
"Owww... Don't worry, I'm already your friend, and you will find more friends in the future" Say Bugzee
"Really?" Ask Selena
"Yes" Say Bugzee
"And I also can be your friend!" Say a voice suddenly, Bugzee stop and look around, but there is no one. If it was not impossible, he could think it was the voice of Pinkie Pie, but she was not around
MEANWHILE IN SOMEWHERE
Santa Hooves is looking to the list of good and evil ponies, near the fire of a chimney with Derpy, Dinky, Doctor Hooves and Pinkie Pie drinking a hot cocoa, when a card appear in front of Santa Hooves.
"MMMM... Interesting, The Changelling Bugzee and Nightmare Moon, after what happened in the wedding of Shining Armor and Mi amore Cadenza, I was going to put all of them and the queen in the naughty list for some years, but this changelling is not like the others... He tried to do good things, even if Lady Luck is every time making it hard... And it seems that Nightmare Moon could also go to the good list... What do you think my friend?" Ask Santa Hooves to the Doctor
"It's Heart Warming, and after everything Lady Luck did, I think he deserves something... Let's go girls" Say the Doctor as he got up
"Go? Go where Doctor?" Ask Derpy
"Isn't it obvious? We are going to kick a little the ass of Lady Luck so that she leave our friend alone" A song begin to sound and the Doctor enter in the TARDIS followed by Derpy and Dinky, and it begin to dissapear.
Pinkie look with a sad smile the TARDIS dissapear, when it appear again
"Ohh, For little and I forget... Pinkie Pie, want to go with us?" Ask Doctor Hooves
"YEEEEEEES!!!!" Shout Pinkie with a big smile as she jump to the inside of the TARDIS
...just to ask will the bug get a swiss army knife and every time when he uses it it lacks the tool needed? XD would be fun at panic...:3
puu.sh/dGoBf/460c64d083.jpg
Flash slips into his native tougne of Germaneigh-ish in panic.
Here's an idea. If bugze ever ends up changing the horde's name to keep sunbutt off their trail for a little bit just to buy some time for one of his plans or something similar, i think a good name would be Legion.
"Our name is Legion for we are many." could be the slogan/motto/whatever
a nice little nod to mass effect there.
I think we're very close to an epic speech moment in this story. The only time Bugsy gets to actually have a speech he completes because everyone watching the spectacle of his showdown with Flag Burner is stock still with fear. I don't think it'll come into play this chapter, but it seems like we're very close to seeing the Offender come out in full cooperative (Bugsy and Nightmare) glory. Below is some dialogue. Could probably use a little more work for dramatic flow improvement since I threw it together in a hurry at first, then spent a bunch of time looking for the Offender's original introduction. (The Darkwing Duck vibe is strong in it.) I'd say we're two, maybe three chapters from epic.
FB: You're WEAK offender! You always were! You always will be! The hoard will bring justice to Equestria!
Bugzy: Weak? Justice?! If murdering innocents, slaughtering helpless mares and foals, and shunning even the most tentative attempt at friendship makes me weak, then I would never wish to be strong.
FB: Fool. We cannot affect change without force! If a few get hurt in the crossfire, that's their own fault! I'll ask you one last time, join me, and we can throw down the false goddesses as is your desire.
Bugzy: This is a perversion of what I desire and nothing more!
FB: Does it matter?! Look at them! They hate you! They will never like you! WE are your friends! Your hoard! We are the only ones who will ever care!
Nimmy: (I never thought I'd hear my own words, and be so utterly disgusted by them.)
FB: You are the symbol of change in Equestria!
Bugzy: I NEVER WANTED THAT!
FB: THEN WHAT DO YOU WANT?!
Bugsy: I JUST WANT TO BE THE GOOD GUY!
FB: YOU WILL NEVER BE THE GOOD GUY IN THEIR EYES!
Bugsy: *chuckles...* Maybe. Maybe... But I'll keep trying. I'll keep trying to the day I die! I am not going to stoop to your level. Ever.
FB: My level?
Bugsy: You're a monster, Flag Burner. You should be proud, really. You've managed to disgust even Nightmare Moon with your goals and methods.
FB: What?!
Bugsy: Oh, you didn't know that, did you? Do you KNOW what gives the Hooded Offender his power? Did you even BOTHER to think about how I could stand up to the princesses and escape alive?! It's because I am the vessel containing the living incarnation of terror herself!
*If this is in front of a crowd, they gasp in shock*
Bugsy: And today, I find myself in total agreement with my wife!-
Nimmy: *Internal shocked choke sound*
*Bystanders also shocked... a few disappointed.*
Bugsy: You are scum! You are LOWER THAN SCUM! And I WILL NOT ALLOW YOU TO TARNISH OUR NAME ANY LONGER!
Nimmy: (My power is your power. Let's paint the town in this fool's ambition.)
Bugsy: (We do this together.)
Nimmy: (For Nightshade's future.)
*Bugsy undergoes a dramatic beam of light transformation, his fully tailed, cloaked form emerging from orange and green flames to tower over FB and any opposing hoard members. Several more cowardly fanatics soil themselves, a few mares swoon... Because that's funny.*
*Bugze and Selene/Nimmy alternate control of speaking as they ad-lib a modified version of the Hooded Offender introduction. Clouds gather around them and start spitting lightning bolts as Nightmare's power manifests.*
Bugsy's Voice: Watching the innocent like the eyes of fate.
Nightmare's Voice: The shadow in the night that scares bad foals straight!
Bugsy's Voice: Protecting those unable to protect themselves!
Nightmare's Voice: Channeling wrath born from screams of a thousand hells!
Bugsy: I am vengeance!
Nightmare: I am the night!
Bugsy + Nightmare: We are fear incarnate!
Bugsy: *RCV* HOODED CHANGLING! NIGHTMARE OFFENDER!
*Nightmare Offender is illuminated by a huge bolt of lightning striking down behind him/her, adding emphasis to the display of might.*
Bugsy + Nimmy: *RCV* "WHO THE BUCK DO YOU THINK WE ARE?!"
Nimmy: (... Wow. That felt really good.)
Bugsy: (I think that's the first time I ever got to finish my... our intro. You've got good form too.)
Nimmy: (It's all in the presentation. It helps if you actually put some cadence and rhyme into it as well.)
Bugsy: (What's Princess Cadance got to do with anything?)
Nimmy: (... 'Dear', kill Flag Burner, not the moment.)
**A little internal humor after the dramatic moment, just to keep in tune with the comedy angle of things.**
**If the six are not present for this, swap Twilight out for somepony else.**
Twilight: You two do realize you're speaking out loud now, right?
Nightmare Offender: Oh... RIGHT! Right... Sorry. This is the first time we've tried joint control.
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So...much...awesomeness
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Would actually be perfect if 'The Nightmare Comes!' actually refers to Bugsy himself.
"What a Twist!"
The first thing you do when seeing Flash is exclaim your excitement, he was an alright guy even though you took him hostage and beat him down.
After holding Flash upside down and shaking him for a few minutes he yells out
“OK OK! Put me down you nutjob!”
“That’s the spirit!” you exclaim as you put him down.“Now, where’s Armor at?”
“The Guard station of course, where else would he be after you murdered Iron Shield!”
Snap
“OK Bucko, let’s get one thing perfectly straight here!” you scream at him, “I didn’t kill anyone!”
“Oh sure, the leader of the guards has an accident after Internal Affairs starts looking into him, and Equestria’s Self Proclaimed Vigilante just so happens to be here,” he says in sarcasm.
“That’s just a coincidence…wait, internal affairs?
“Iron Shield, and heck, most of the Fillydelphian guard aren’t what you would call clean…but you already know that don’t you?”
“Corrupted guards? Really? Wow, this really is starting to feel like a Batmane situation…but that’s beside the point, I didn’t have anything to do with this.”
“Then what do you call this?” he asks as he holds up a card with your symbol on it, “found right here at the scene of the accident?”
“Da Buck?” you ask as you actually look around you and see that the alleyway seems to have a lot of explody parts everywhere with yellow guard tape wrapped around the area.
“Wow, how did I not notice that before?” you ask to yourself.
“The Fillydelphian Guards wrapped this case up as an accident only an hour after it occurred, so Captain Armor sent me out here for a second opinion, and I find this, not even remotely hidden. How do you explain that?” he asks.
“Obviously the Guards are highly incompetent?” you guess.
“That would be a good guess, if it weren’t for the fact that half the guards here are dirtier than an Earth Pony Farmer.”
“Hey, that’s Racist!” you exclaim, seeing as how your family happens to be exactly that.
He gets a guilty look on his face, “Sorry! That’s my father talking not me!” he shakes his head and gets serious again, “But yeah, obviously you got some Guards on your payroll, and you left this just for spite!”
“Oh for the love of…would you kindly chill out?” you say as you freeze him again.
“Oh Come on!” he yells.
“Now listen, I know you’re not stupid, not like your last CO, so listen to me when I say this again. I…DIDN’T…KILL…ANYONE!!!! GOT IT?!”
“But…the card…” he tries to continue.
“It’s not mine, it was left here by the true criminal mastermind.”
“Really? And who would that be?” he asks in disbelief.
“His name is Flag Burner, or at least that’s what others call him, and he is the leader of the Hoard faction here.”
Flash’s eyes open in realization.
“I’ve heard that name…he recently sent out threatening letters to each of the Element Bearers and both the Princesses…”
“Oh that son of a…grrrr…I’m going to slap him even harder for that…but ya, he’s your true culprit.”
“But…he’s one of your own then…so you still are responsible”
“NO! I’M NOT! This nutjob is using me as an excuse to get what he wants, heck, he just tried to leave me in a dark cell to die because I didn’t think how he thought I would.”
“He…”
“And now he’s going to do something worse, he’s going to kill a lot of ponies tonight.”
Flash Gasps.
“I don’t know how, or where, but it’s going to be tonight! And that’s why I need to talk to Armor, we need to work together before it’s too late, and sitting here playing the blame game won’t help us anytime soon!”
“…OK, I’ll help you, just unfreeze me ok?”
You unfreeze him and give him a hug, since he has finally seen the light.
You yell out, “FLASH!!! AAAAAAAHHHHHH! SAVIOR OF THE UNIVERSE!”
He looks angry at that and kicks you in the head
“Ow! The Buck was that for?”
“You know how many times I had to hear that at school and in Boot Camp?! I’m tired of it!” he snarls.
“Oh come on,” you say as you get back up, “Flash Gordon is a great hero, I’m complimenting you.”
“Flash Gordon is a stupid series…” he says back.
You just stare at him in silence before you punch him in the snout.
“Ow!”
“Learn to take a compliment man, and don’t you ever dis my favorite shows again” you say with glowing eyes.
“Now, enough wasting time, onward to the station.”
You start to take a few steps before he grabs your cloak.
“You can’t just walk into the station, not when we don’t know who to trust.”
“Oh, that makes sense…” you say aloud, “what do you suggest?
You are lead into the station as “Flash’s Prisoner”. You start screaming crazy things at the top of your lungs that make you sound extremely insane.
“What you got there flyboy?” asks a guard.
“Another lunatic claiming to be the offender, these guys just keep coming out the woodwork.”
“I LIKE CHEESE!” you yell, “ALIENS STOLE MY BRAIN! THE ELVES IN MY NOSE ARE FILTHY COMMIES!”
Everyone just assumes you are a nutjob as he puts you in an interrogation room.
“Alright, sit tight while I grab the captain.”
“DON’T EAT MY MOTHER IN LAW!” you yell
“You don’t have to keep doing that.” He chides
“Sorry, kind of got lost in the moment.”
When Shining Armor walks into the room, he has a disgusted look on his face.
“ I almost couldn’t believe it when Flash told me, but here you are…”
“Hey Captain…how’s Cadence doing?”
He ignores you as he sits down.
“You have five minutes.”
“To what?” you ask.
“To convince me why I shouldn’t beat you to a pulp and bring you before the Princesses and the Elements for judgement.”
You gulp at that, because his eyes are scary looking.
“OK, Look, Like I told Savior of the Universe here,” Flash Growls a that, “Something bad is about to happen, and you need to stop it.”
“Care to Elaborate Bug?”
“Well…” you then retell exactly what has happened to you and how this faction of the horde is radical, and how they caused the accident.
“And that’s about it.” You end.
Shining looks a bit disturbed at this, “So, a radical faction of your fan club is planning on overthrowing the Princesses and starting a war, all because of the fact that you exist?”
“Oh come on, don’t say it like that!” you wail.
“Well thanks for the information…Bugze” you gasp as he says this, “But unfortunately, what you’ve said doesn’t really help us much. We can’t exactly search the entire city at once, and everywhere is crowded thanks to the Hearth’s Warming shopping. It could be anywhere.”
“Then start doing sweeps or something.” You exclaim.
“Not to mention, I don’t know who to trust in this city, Anyone could be one of your Horde members.”
“Come on! We have to do something.”
“We are, we are going to place you under arrest and let the whole city know, that should shake things up a bit.” Shining says plainly.
“Oh Come ON!” you yell.
Luckily, outside your window, which overlooks the city, and see All across the city, projected images of Flag as the HO are playing in every public area. He is standing on a Hoofball field while other members of the horde stand around him.
“It is just like Batmane Rises! Well, except we can probably understand what he’ll say” you say aloud.
Shining and Flash look at you before Flag begins speaking.
“Hello to you ponies of Equestria, and Happy Early Hearths Warming, I bring to you tidings of joy. I am the Hooded Offender, and I have come to let you know of the changing tide.”
“Oh no,” you say as you watch the projection.
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Yes! Soon this must happen!
And then once the Nightmare cat's out of the bag, there will be an actual reason for him to be wanted instead of Discord's meddling.
My favorite Christmas special is "A Christmas Carol" the George C Scott version. He is my favorite version of Scrooge, and his voice and mannerisms just fit the character perfectly.
Now that you have your things back, it's time to take the fight to the would-be imposter, Flag Burner.
(To Flag Burner); "I'm taking you in or taking you out. Your call."
Anyway, favorite Christmas special... Anything that's both enjoyable AND reminds us what Christmas is really about (hint; not presents or anything to do with corporation and stores).
Remember and use "Forcefield" spell when attacked by over-reacting guards.
Get random thought to buy Nightshade a gift for her first Hearth's Warming Eve.
5415935
This happens, but I recommend that it be modified so that Bugze pulls a "Play Along Prisoner" and lets himself get arrested by Flash to get an audience with Shining (I highly doubt the version of Flash in this story would break under interrogation AND Bugze being a "Play Along Prisoner" will make things simpler as I highly doubt he could just walk into Royal Guard HQ without getting dogpiled)
Flash and a shackled you make your way to the Police Station when,
"Halt!"
You both freeze when approached by a trio of Royal Guard, a unicorn and an earth pony (who looks oddly familiar...) being led by a... Zebra
The Zebra introduces himself as "Second Liutenant Alonzo" (and for some reason says "King Kong ain't got Horseapples on me!") while you both finally remember that the Earth Pony is Strong Head.
Flash exposes the trio as "stained shields" with wordplay.
Flash turns to you before suddenly body-checking Alonzo. You catch on and attack the other two with a "Psycho Crusher" and tackle them both into the wall.
Interrogate Alonzo with vise-grips to the tounge and say "Allons-y Alonzo!" and find out that FLag Burner put a bounty on your head.
===================
Favorite Holiday special is Blackadder's Christmas Carol
For it is the ONLY reverse Christmas Carol.
As Flag Burner is making his address, the Inventory begins to flash. You pull out the Doctor's notebook and find a message.
DO NOT ATTACK FLAG BURNER.
This fight isn't meant for you, my boy. The Nightmare is coming. Only you can stop it.
You need to walk away.
The book shakes as your hooves quiver in rage.
He knows. He knew! He always knew!
Calm your-
Calm? CALM?! He dragged me out of Appleloosa for... for... WHAT?! He knew what was going on and he didn't-
GONG
Deal with him later! The threat is nigh, and you already tried stopping it on your own. We need a plan.
---
Favorite Christmas special? The Muppet Christmas Carol with Michael Caine.
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Hah! Idea~!
Song: Sonic Symphony - Super soldier
----------------
Flag Burner stared into the eyes of the approaching Offender, holding a still rage from within. "You won't do it."
The Hooded Offender stopped. "Huh?"
"You'll be a villain if you do. You'll be the King of the Hoard who murdered one of his own in cold blood! What would Equestria think? What would the rest of the Hoard think?!" he shouted.
Bugze closed his eyes in thought. " ...Ever since my faked death, I was ready to be another blurred face in history, a villain better off forgotten. But when the Hoard appeared, I was so happy! Finally, I wasn't alone, there were people who understood me! You're right, the Hooded Offender does want to be a hero." He opened his eyes, glowing in blood Orange. "But that's not what me and BST wants."
The revolutionists' eyes widened. "What?"
"Do you know what this hood is? What reference it orginally was? This is the hood of a Nobody! By donning it, you were prepared to be nobody, along with many others. You dont know this and yet you call yoursef one of my biggest fans."
"I don't understand!" he said, the realization dawning on him.
"The Hooded Offender was never real. It's just a wishful dream. Who you thought the Hooded Offender was, what you thought the Hoard was all about, is just a dream. Instead, it is your worst nightmare. I'm your worst nightmare."
"N-no! That's a lie! You're a liar!"
Bugze shook his head and stepped forwards. "Don't you see? I AM a lie! And that is the last truth you'll ever hear out of me.
"The Hoard is my family now. If one cold-blooded action is what it takes to make them innocent, then I'm ready to be the villain!" Bugze grabbed him by the collar of his hood and shouted, "Now tell me: Who do the hell do you think I am NOW?!"
Flag Burner, who was once full of convinction, was now nothing but a pathetic, sputtering mess. "N-no! No! The Nightmare has Come. The Nightmare has Come! You can't kill me!" He pushed Bugze off and ran with his back facing the Offender. "To perserve the Hoards Honor! I must live! I HAVE to live! The Hooded Offender will NOT die this way!"
"Goodbye, and I hope you rest in peace," Bugze said somberly. "Because I won't."
I like Portal Christmas.
I like 2013 more than 2012.
I like 2014 more than 2013.