Very lovely chapter. Her lust filled descent is all inspiring.

I also love how they ask for her consent. Like it's on her accord to give her some good forbidden lovin.

It's a foursome, not a gangbang. Aaaaaaaaagh.

I wondered about Shining Armor.

And I feel bad for Cheerilee.

However, that did not stop me from enjoying this. I present to you this Twilight ahegao.

KBO.

Usually I refrain from adding works to my favorites when they are still in progress, but damn it... The tentacles......the tentacles...frick you, man, quit making me feel dirty :(

Teht storeyh be too gawd. Yarrr. Fav'd

Another great chapter! Loved it!

First clop that really worked me up. Congrats!
I'd already faved and liked on the first chapter, but i'd do it again if I could.

hell yeah that was awesome can twi and I switch places

Amazing!

oh my when the this is over and when or if Twilight finds her friends i wager she will be quite the perv

i wonder how its going with the rest of her friends hmmm

i wonder what would happen if she finds a portal to Mareth (Corruption of Champions)

4810422

mylittlefacewhen.com/media/f/img/mlfw3167-13303809323092.gif

Yeeeeeesssss, embrace the tentacles... Or they'll embrace you!

4810732

Thank you, good sir.

4810782

Ah, I always do like these sorts of comments. "I don't usually like this sort of thing, but..." It's a form of flattery all on its own.

4810873

You could always copy/paste the chapter and use find and replace to swap her name with yours.

4813097

She's certainly getting more at ease with it all, isn't she? Although I think if she was teleported to Mareth, she'd probably feel quite comfortable before too long. Might not be too crazy about the transformations though.

4813314 well yeah but it wouldn't be the same

Yeah, not gonna lie, I expected this a lot darker. I love how you can tell that Twilight is enjoying it, indeed even asking for it. :D

This chapter is a mixed-bag for me but not for any of the scenes in the chapter but rather the lack of story. Yes, I am well aware this is a clop fic and sex scenes appearing in chapters go without saying but the fact that not even 300 words in(even less I think) you jumped right into the clop.

What I'm saying is that I think you should provide a little more lead-up. Like for example:
What is going through Twilight's mind? How worried is she about her friends?

Things of that nature. Something to lead up to the scene a little more than just "BAM! SEX!"(aka: MORE STORY)

Heck, if you wanna follow the episode, have twilight meet up with each of her friends and that can provide more lead-up dialogue PLUS even more options for future clop scenes.

4813469

Just because something is tagged dark, doesn't mean it's going to be totally evil, or totally gory.
Sometimes a dark set fic means something as simple as a good character slowly becoming evil or being slowly convinced to abandon their duty.

Or in this case, Twilight is being slowly corrupted into never wanting to leave the maze so that she can continue to be sexually pleasured as much as she wants and never use the elements of harmony against Discord.

4817195 Say what like what before. I say many things, my good sir.

You know as much as I'd love for Discord to win, that story's been done before. I'd love for the mane 6 to win, but keep all the mental changes Discord caused. After all, this isn't something a memory spell can fix, is it?

Edit: Also I was wondering, why does this have a Slice of life tag? Given that Twilight is being put through rather extreme circumstances, is going to face unknown locations and dangers but has a clear goal, you'd think Adventure would be more appropriate.

4816462

I did have something in mind for Twilight's friends, but you have me reconsidering. It depends on what sort of ideas I get for it, but I may be introducing them earlier than I had intended.

To address your other concerns, I see where you are coming from in regards to story. While I'm honestly not convinced that 'more story' is what most of the people following this want to see, I will take what you've said into consideration and will explore more of Twilight's thoughts in the next chapter, and perhaps make her a bit more reluctant to go through with whatever obstacle she runs into.

And I will commend you for seeing the point of the chapter; you got it pretty much exactly. The hint is right in the title of the story: The Maze of Depravity. Not the Maze of Gratuitous Rape. It's a moral grey area, obviously, but it's not your typical 'back alley assault', nor was that ever the intention. I was worried that that wasn't obvious enough. My editor was particularly vocal about it, and it caused me to seriously reconsider posting the chapter (at least in its present form), but ultimately I decided to stand by it. Fortunately, it seems that it managed to do what it was supposed to.

Thank you for the long review, and I will certainly be considering what you've said.

4817661

I'm not going to tell you how it ends, but if that concept has been done before I'd certainly like to hear about it.

As for the Slice of Life tag, I thought long and hard about whether to use that or adventure. While the story does have aspects of an adventure, ultimately it focuses on a single character and the people that she encounters. It was also never going to be a particularly long story, and I generally see adventures as long fics. That was why I opted for Slice of Life instead.

But, given what you've said, I think perhaps the 'adventure tag' is more suitable, especially since the concept has already been expanded beyond my original plan.

4818628
The stories I was thinking of were (to a lesser extent) Garden of chaos, and to a greater extent, Path of discord. I'd link but I'm on my iPad at the moment and am lazy.

In fact, I'll be honest, this story reminded me a LOT of Path of Discord, from the first chapter and premise, but I do get the feeling it's not going to go in the same direction. And hopefully, will actually have a proper ending.

Fun Fact^^ "schlurp" is actually the garman name of the pokemon Lickitung^^ so reading that made me laugh a bit^^

MORE, MORE, MORE! :D

Rainbow:Okay twilight as you walk forward you see an older version of Spike in front of you.
Twilight:Where do you get these ideas anyway?
Rainbow:"blushing"none of your business."Taking a breath"Okay...he attempts to seduce you,roll for perception.
Twilight:"rolls"Oh hey I got an one.Is that like the best one?...Rainbow why are you smiling like that?
Rainbow:"Smiling like a retard"Suddenly your brother and Big Mac appear behind you.
Rarity:"blushing"Oh my perhaps you should calm down Dash.
Rainbow:Shut up Rarity it's not your turn yet.
Pinkie:"jumping up and down"Oh oh can I be next can I can I pleeaaaaase with cherries on top ormaybestrawberriesthoseareprettydelicioustooandohwowijustgotanideaforastrawberrycakewithstrawberrycreamandstrawberriesontopand...
Fluttershy:"whispers"P-perhaps we should continue the game?
Applejack:Yeah I'm gettin bored over here Twilight is in both of the scenes so far."Suspicious glare"How many twilight scenes did you make again?
Rainbow:"nervous"n-not too many,you'll get yours I promise"hides a dozen pages away"

lovely:3

Wowwie that was sexy. never thought I'd get into a tentacle story, but I'm glad I did.

Three words,
KEEP. IT. COMING.

4818628 Slice of Life is like, Life in Ponyville.
Though with the weird shit they go through weekly, Slice of Life is pretty fitting.

4809974 why not both?

4841814 No, it can't be both. A gangbang is 5+ participants. This has merely four.

4816462

Hey, I ain't complaining. I like it.

Turning Twilight into a depraved sexual creature? Discord, I like your style.

derpicdn.net/img/2013/2/16/245930/full.png

that was an ib\nteresting chapter I wonder what will happen next

moar

MOAR BUCKINGMOAR

4830433 I think you mean keep it cumming

4841914 well TECHNICALLY a gang is a certain group of people, be it two to nineteen, afterward being known as a mob, and bang is slang for sex, so...yes it can

4999466 No. It. Can't. These are practical terms that couldn't be any clearer, and I mean any clearer, and ignorant morons keep screwing it up.

5+ participants? That's a gangbang/orgy/groupsex/whatever, because 4 participants is a foursome, 3 participants a threesome, and 2 participants a pair. While 4 participants can technically constitute an orgy if they switch partners at least once, that isn't the situation in this fic or in that chapter. Therefore, it is not a gangbang. It's a foursome through and through.

4810422 TENTACLES!!!!!!!!!!!

4999432

next chapter please

4818628 Dustys castle (a flash game) did something similar.

4999486 well if you wanna get even more technical, they did switch partners. First it was spike on Twi, then shining on twi, then shining on spike on twi on big Mac...sooooo....that classifies as your definition of an orgy which you used as a synonym to gang bang, making this a gang bang

5057729 You don't understand. There wasn't two sexual units operating at one time. There was only one pony getting all the attention.

If there are at least than two sexual units operating seperately and if these two sexual units switch partners at least once, that constitutes an orgy.

5057799 ...again, shining got twi for a short time then switched to spike, so technically twi AND spike had some form of attention

5057843

Ugh, forget it. Just forget it. This stupid story's never getting an update anyways. I don't have the patience to argue semantics with morons any longer.

5057849 ...well I will admit you probably know more about it than I do, it's just that I, like anybody at one point or another, felt like being a smart-a**. It's just an easy way to vent off steam, ya know? Anyways, sorry about all this.

5057860

Nah, it's alright. Semantics are semantics. I just wished people would call things what they are and not something else entirely.

5057865 Yeah, that does get kind of annoying sorry. Also, YAY FORGIVENESS!

Kinky equestrian mares are best mares.

Dream of every male in the world.

5065097
Don't you mean 99.99% of males? Cuz I don't dream of sex...