Epilogue B: Before I Go
A single, low pitched beep. Every second, on the second. A stable, predictable line of noise, continuing without pause into the past and future.
For an eternity, that was the only thing he knew. The only constant in the world.
Sometimes he could feel the pain in his side. Sometimes he couldn’t. Sometimes there was darkness all around. Sometimes there were fevered dreams of bright colors and cooing mares. He felt enough to remember he was a pony. But then he would feel and remember nothing.
Sometimes there were voices. Sometimes the whole world was silent.
Except for the beeping. Even when there was nothing, there was the beeping. It always had been, and always will be.
One day, the eternity came to an end. He began to hear and feel again. Not dreams, but truths. His limbs ached. He was on a bed. The air was dry, and voices could be heard in the hallway.
A realization struck him, his first conscious thought in weeks.
If that beeping doesn’t stop *now* I am going to go insane.
His eyes opened, and he squinted them immediately. Too bright. It reminded him of somepony.
Right, Celestia. He had…forgotten. And his name was Blueblood.
His still-muddled mind thought to grope for a snooze button. Anything to turn the beeping off. He lifted a leg, but it felt like it was made of lead. He stubbornly forced it upwards, higher above him.
No good. It fell down hard across his side, slapping the dressing on his chest. Blueblood gave a parched groan. It hurt, but not as much as the damn beeping did.
The noise got the attention of the ponies in the hallway. A mare leaned into his view: a very young, very pretty unicorn in nursing scrubs. Her green face was split in a wide grin.
Her voice was loud, and far and away too perky. “Well, look who’s finally up!”
Blueblood groaned again and closed his eyes.
----------
They turned off the beeping, and Blueblood’s world grew very quiet. He couldn’t have visitors yet. Something about germs. That was fine. He didn’t feel like talking.
Instead, he listened. To hear the doctors tell it, Celestia had raced him to the hospital. Things were touch and go, but he had pulled through.
That got a smile from him, his first since waking up. Celestia saved him. She saved them all.
The world still made sense.
He’d be laid up for another month or two. Blueblood’s lung had been pierced, but they were able to drain the blood and seal the wound. The sword had reached his heart, too. Luck alone made it hit the muscle, and not the crucial blood vessels.
He’d be weak for the rest of his life. When they told him, Blueblood just shrugged. Being a noble didn’t take much strength.
It was pretty easy, actually.
----------
A package came one day. He opened it with listless curiosity, not knowing or much caring what lay inside.
A plate of cookies. Yay. He immediately passed them off to the too-perky nurse. It bought him a little more time alone.
Beneath the plate was a small pile of colored papers.
No…cards.
Six of them, to be precise. Along with a photograph of six smiling mares, holding up a sign that read “Get Well Soon!”
The Elements of Harmony. A smile sneaked its way onto his face, but he quickly suppressed it. They were strangers. Princess Celestia probably asked them to do this.
He began pulling out the cards, but didn’t open any. Their token sympathy meant nothing.
But it was a little interesting how each card was different. His bored mind tried to connect them to the right author based on what little he knew of them.
One was obvious: a letter with a waxen seal, bearing the mark of the Element of Magic.
There was a bright pink get-well card, decorated with a picture of three balloons. Glitter had been applied liberally to the cover, and leaking from inside the fold was…fudge?
Laughter. Another easy one. Probably that pink pony doing a hoofstand in the photo.
Beneath it, two stock cards. Inside would lay some printed message for the sender to sign their name to. One had kittens and puppies cuddling on the front. The other had “You’re Awesome!” emblazoned like some eight year-old’s birthday card. No real clue.
Close to the bottom wasn’t a ‘card’ per se, but a folded sheet of paper. “Blueblood” was crudely written on the front, along with an awkward dirt smear running down the side.
He didn’t know which, but he did know one of the Elements was a farmer. The dirt, the pen-in-mouth writing, and the lack of his title all pointed to that one.
Farmer means earth pony, which means probably the orange one. Standing in the picture solid and practical, a stark contrast to the pink mare.
Farmers are smart. They know what they are.
The old notion passed through his mind, and he gave a blink of a smile before setting the letter to the side. Not even his magic touched the dirt. Couldn’t stand the stuff.
The last one…Rarity. And now that he saw her image, he remembered. She tried to make him her road to nobility, he shut her down with guilty, gleeful pleasure.
It seemed kind of silly now, with all that lay behind them. Maybe she agreed. She had sent a sealed letter clearly stamped “From the Desk of Rarity Belle.” The envelope bulged with what had to have been over a dozen pages within. Rather than a card, Rarity appeared to have sent a novella.
He tossed it onto the night stand with the rest.
The girls wrote them either because Celestia asked them, or to make themselves feel better. Either way, the purpose was done.
The clock said 4 P.M. Good a time as any to go to sleep.
----------
The door opening woke him up. Blueblood had always been a light sleeper.
8 P.M. Not a bad pre-sleep nap. He sat up, fumbling for the lamp.
“Allow me,” a motherly voice spoke. Celestia flicked the switch at the doorway, bathing the room in light.
It wasn’t a big surprise. Celestia cared. Blueblood smiled and bowed his head.
“I came as soon as I could.” Celestia strode into the room, smiling gently. “Today they said you could start getting visitors and packages. I see you’ve already gotten…”
Her magic picked up Twilight’s letter. The smile turned to a soft frown as she turned it over, noting the intact seal.
“You’re not going to read these?”
“Not really, no.” Blueblood shook his head. “I can if you want me to.”
Celestia gave a quick laugh, like she could scarcely believe it. “Blueblood, these are ‘get well soon’ and ‘thank you’ cards! Why don’t you want to read them?”
“Your Highness, we’re strangers.” Blueblood shrugged. “I don’t need a stranger’s fake gratitude.”
She tilted her head, looking to him with confusion. “’Fake’ gratitude?”
Blueblood frowned at the disapproval in her voice. Celestia went on, smiling like it was a joke with a tired punchline. “Blueblood, stranger or no, is it ‘fake’ to be grateful to the one who saved their lives?”
Blueblood smiled blankly. “That was you, Princess.”
She reared her head back a little bit, looking at him with surprise. Then the shock faded to a quiet, resigned frown. Celestia closed her eyes and shook her head slowly.
“Oh, Blueblood. Have you really learned nothing?”
She opened them again and looked right at him. “Can you not even acknowledge your own triumph?”
They weren’t seeing eye to eye at all. “That was your triumph, Princess. You do me too much credit, I-“
A gold-shod hoof slammed to the ground, bringing a noise like a powder bomb. The bed leapt and rattled, along with its startled occupant.
In the space of a second, Celestia crossed the room and leaned down over him. Blueblood tried to shirk into the bed, but she just leaned down closer. Her pink eyes held his gaze fast, angry and sad and stern.
“I don’t know why ponies do this.” Her words were fast, and laden with contained frustration. “To yourselves and to me. To waste yourself in blind faith. To embrace insignificance. I don’t want that. I lay in defeat, saved only by your own hooves. And still you cling to this, to this…”
She breathed a sharp sigh and looked away, drawing back from him. “Idiocy.”
Her gaze returned to him, softer and sadder, and Blueblood’s darted away.
“’Princess’ this, and ‘highness’ that. What happened to ‘Aunt Celly?’ What’s wrong with that?”
“Because, because…”
Blueblood’s eyes remained on the wall. “Because it’s not right. Compared to you, the rest of us are…well, dead. Not this time, but soon enough. Whatever I did, you would have eventually triumphed anyway. Another pony would have helped, or you would have broken out with your own power. Because you’re Princess Celestia. You’re not a pony, you’re forever. You’ll always be, and the rest of us won’t. Blink, and I’m gone. And that’s okay, because ponies die. But not you. You’ll still be here. You're the important one.”
Celestia looked at him carefully for a moment. Slowly, a fragile, tender smile came to her face.
“Forever.”
She said the word, and settled a forehoof very softly on his own.
“I don’t want a religion, Blueblood. It would be misplaced. I don’t live in forever.”
Her own death was not a subject she discussed often. Celestia took a steadying breath and went on. “I can die, you know. By magic or force. Each time disaster loomed, it was not some divine will or great destiny that saved me. It was my subjects. It was you.”
“I draw power from the Sun, nephew. All power runs out eventually. All suns fade away. Even if no violence claims me, a billion years will pass…and I’ll be dust.”
“That’s still a long time,” Blueblood noted.
“To you, yes.” Celestia’s soft smile went on. “To the universe? Not even the time it takes to draw a breath. One day, someone will blink. And I’ll be dead when their eyes open.”
Blueblood tried to form a response, but she went on before he could. Celestia touched his chin, tilting his head to look at her. “But I’m not dead now. No more than you are, and you are not. We are alive. One day we won’t be, and that’s okay. But today we are. Today we have potential – to grow, to change, to wonder, to love. And that’s why I…”
She tapped her chest, then passed a hoof gently over his bandaged side. “And you…”
The hoof returned to its place on the ground. “And all the rest of us are special. Are ‘worth it.’ Are all going our own way, doing the best we know how.”
“So do the best you know how. Enjoy life. Seek happiness. If that means changing nothing, that’s fine. If it means changing everything, that’s fine too.”
She took a step back, away from the bedside. The last words came in a whisper. “Whatever you choose to do, I want you to value your life as much as I do.”
----------
That was it. Celestia waited a few minutes for a response, but none came. She sighed, patted his hoof a last time, and made her exit.
Blueblood did exchange a last, tiny smile with her before she left. He sighed and settled back as the door closed, eyes on the ceiling.
The world didn’t make sense, after all.
Celestia will die.
A deep breath in. A long breath out.
She was lying. She wanted to make me feel special, so she made up that story about the sun going out. She’s forever.
The words passed through his mind, utterly without conviction. Nothing but a fantasy asking to be duct-taped over reality.
No, the belief was gone. The world was complicated. He hated ‘complicated.’
”Seek happiness.” That’s what she said.
I’ve been content. Is that enough?
It wasn’t. He frowned. Contentment came from knowing his place. From knowing he might as well be content with what he has.
Like a farmer. A farmer’s content to be a farmer. No need to be anything else.
Except an Element of Harmony.
Another sigh. He really didn’t like this.
Happiness. Enjoyment. Would it come from a life of idle nobility?
Probably not. He’d always… just sort of gone with the flow. It wasn’t painful, but it wasn’t enjoyable. To go to those boring garden parties and spend his life tutting along with the others about fashion and lineage… no. He could be content with that. He couldn’t be happy.
And he sort of wanted to be… useful. The thought sat well with him. Useful like Celestia. Using her… limited.…
Yes, ‘limited.’ Using her limited time to help others.
What, though?
Pursue science? Spellcasting? No, neither interested him.
Become a bureaucrat? Feh. Spending his life writing unread reports didn’t seem like a road to happiness.
Travel? No, he never liked to travel. He liked things predictable. He liked to be settled.
His eyes drifted to the side, where the unread cards lay.
There was Rarity’s overfilled envelope. A strand of purple hair had been caught in the seal when she closed it.
Look for love? He actually snorted at that one. No, love isn’t something you go looking for. I think. Never really learned about it.
The pink card lay next to it. A few crumbs of fudge had fallen out onto the nightstand. Blueblood lit his horn and hastily brushed the mess into the garbage.
Cook? Nothing really wrong with it, except for a lack of interest.
To the side of that one, the folded, dirt-stained letter.
Farm?
“Pfft.”
It was funny even thinking about it.
Settled. Useful.
Blueblood forced the smile from his face. It was stupid. A fop urban noble who was scared of dirt. And crippled to boot. What a stupid idea.
Stupid.
The smile returned. He forced it down again, but it came right back.
Just ‘Blueblood’ written on the front. No ‘Prince.’ And that smear on the side. Probably from her hoof, when she folded it.
He reached over and – very gingerly – tapped the smudge. It wasn’t so bad. Though he did wipe his hoof off on the bedsheet.
Settled. Useful. Don’t have to talk a lot. Don’t have to pretend to enjoy champagne or fashion shows.
The smile grew. He tapped the smear again, actually letting out a giggle.
Stupid. What a stupid idea.
He tried to force the smile down again, but this time couldn’t even finish.
A third tap on the dirt smear. This time he pressed his hoof down a little bit. Not so bad. He could get used to it.
Blueblood glanced to the clock and groaned. 10 o’clock and he wasn’t even tired.
At least he could pass the time. With a soft glow of his horn, Blueblood levitated Twilight’s letter over to his side. He slit the seal neatly with his magic, removed the paper, and began to read.
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Personally I liked the previous epilogue more, but this was good too. Glad that Blueblood has a new lease on life in this one.
Of the two epilogues I liked the second better. The first didn't feel strong enough for the story for me. I think if we want the sad ending, ending the story before the epilogue is much stronger. Then again, the epilogue still hit me strong with the powerful meaning behind what Celestia and Luna say. Good job, even if the epilogues caught me by surprise. :)
Just... Wow. It's... kind of humbling to see his thought process remaining the same after everything that happened...
And then my brain crashed right along-side Blueblood's...
But still... I was wondering if that wasn't the road he would choose in the end. A part of me would lol SO hard at a sequel with AppleBlood, but I'm not sure how it would be handled, considering everything that's happened. It would be highly complicated for sure...
Oh well. I'll just have to try to imagine what that would be like in my head.
This was a new and refreshing story in a sea of copies. I enjoyed the story, and I enjoyed the epilogues. I'm not going to choose one as my favorite because I feel that they are both excellent and both part of the story.
Wait. Epilogue...?
...No... Dude... Just...
WHY? Why the HELL would you ADD to this?
Why would you REMOVE that ending...? Well, not remove it, but make it null?
This was awesome as it stood. There was never a need to add to it. Unless you intended to do this from the start. In which case, you are a bit of a fool.
Sorry for the harsh words. But, that's simply how I feel on this.
~Skeeter The Lurker
I have read both the epilogues. And as far as I am concerned both are canon for this fanfic. Yay for the concept of Infinity!
On one hand epilogue A while sad, fit in with the whole theme/belief of Blueblood. The very belief that drove him to go against Ironhoof. And die for it.
Epilogue B on the other hand gives us change and hope. Something the good prince seem to be lacking. Not to mention hints of AppleBlood...
I am not ashamed that I am now shipping those two together. Not ashamed at all. No siree. Plus, the thought of Prince Blueblood undergoing character development from the annoying fop during the gala to a prince-turned-farmer is quite...gratifying? I dunno. But the whole reason why I read fics about Blue is to see that development after all. So I am content.
So Mr/Mrs Author, thank you for the story. The time spent reading this fic was satisfying.
Keep up the good work,
Razor
Love them both, but i think the sad one was more powerful while the happy one was more fulfilling.
Oh, by the way, don't worry much about way Skeeter said. While I do agree with him about having the epilogue kinda ruins the whole thing but some people (like me!) prefers a more ... er... substantial? (is that the word I'm looking for?) well something about endings that the two epilogue have.
Am I making sense? If not can someone help me out here? I kinda suck at explaining things.
Is the word closure I'm looking for?
Dangit, I'm confusing myself...
...........Appleblood? Bluejack?
Hmm....
Not a ship that I have seen before, but I like it already.
Great epilogues by the way, you surprised me with them.
It's really sad but no matter how many times I click the thumbs up button, the likes do not increase...
...Why did you do this?
Why?
What possible reason could you have had for this?
You spent all of the first chapter making Blueblood into something MORE! Something beyond and then...
You make the HUGE mistake of reverting him to type. Returning him to what we see in the Gala.
Just... Why? What did you hope to gain from this?
I could forgive the first Epilogue... THAT was pretty good. But this one? I can't approve of it. It just... Fails.
I'm sorry if I offend you with this, I truly am... But I liked this story a lot and you, in my view, destroyed it.
I'm sorry.
Really, guys? I even say I'm sorry for having to make such a comment! Why the damn downvotes? Whatever. Do what you must.
~Skeeter The Lurker
Blueblood as a farmer? Well, he does respect them. Blueblood x Applejack? That would be interesting.
) However, I do like both of them. I can't pick a favorite at this time, though.
Personally, I wasn't expecting to read anymore from this story. I could have left it as is, and let my imagination run wild (and being back cake
3877975
I'm definitely going to have to agree on this one.
That first part was wonderful, though.
3878051
In the pre-epilogue story, you felt that Blueblood became something "more"? I thought the entire point was that Blueblood was simply more than he believed himself to be. Or am I misunderstanding you?
3878182
Probably misunderstanding me.
I was simply saying that he took the character and threw what impression we had out the window. Then goes on and destroys it with the second epilogue.
~Skeeter The Lurker
Every story must have an ending. If we ignore this and push too far, bad things happen.
Bad things like what happened here. The second Epilogue has its own place in the narrative, but jeez. The first chapter is a cut and dry Tragedy. A character is doomed by their own inherent traits, Tragic Hero of the greatest degree.
And Epilogue B throws it all out for a simple 'Happy Ending'. You had a piece of art, and then you drew a huge yellow smiley face on it.
Well, I hope one tarnished masterpiece at least served the purpose of teaching you the valuable lesson.
As a writer, you have to know when a story is done, and stick to your guns. Your fans may beg, but they are not the ones that have to live with a story that is destroyed by being dragged on past its time.
-Lumino
Seriously, the first part was wonderful.
Also, I'm sorry that you ended up with Alondro comments. Alondro comments are the worst comments.
3878241
I dunno, I think the second epilogue works just fine. Sorry if happy endings aren't "artistic" enough for you.
3878433
I love happy endings, but there is a time and place for everything. Adding a happy ending to what was otherwise a breathtaking tragedy feels so tacked on that it literally ruins the story.
-Lumino
3878502
To each his own, I suppose. I just don't think that the beauty or effectiveness of this story hinge on whether or not Blueblood dies (stated or implied). Also, to me it read more like an existential analysis, as opposed to a tragedy.
I think that the work is stronger by itself without both epilogues. There was some measure of beauty in the original ending.
Both epilogues are well written, but they both contain outcomes we could imagine. Both were written well, but this piece stands better on its own.
I don't mind them, and they are written quite well as I've said. But they fall short of what you managed to do in the story itself. I don't know how I feel about the epilogues I suppose.
In any case. Good job man.
Good job.
I actually enjoyed this.
This may sound weird but I prefered the second epilogue to the first. The talk with Celestia was really something.
The moral I got from it is that we will all eventually die, so why not enjoy this wild ride called life while we can?
If my current avatar doesn't tell you I like the little hint of bluejack,I will simply call this sweet. Nice character development here to.
Requesting epilogue C, where Celestia doesn't make it to the hospital for whatever reason and the two sit down and she watches him die, and he tells her that it's ok. It was all worthwhile. He loves her. And if his own death was the price to be paid to save her and Equestria, it was a price he was willing to pay. He'd lived his life in pointlessness, but in death he'd finally done something genuinely worthwhile, and that act made his entire life worth living.
Tragedy is overrated, I'm going with the second epilogue.
I'm surprised that so many are bitching about the epilogues. Me, I like happy endings, so I'm going with this epilogue.
I liked both endings, although since I am a softie, I liked the happy ending better.
Great work on the story. But you know what this means right?
Blueblood x Applejack fic time! It would be rather unique pairing atleast!
Hope it happens!
3878002
Well, I'm really sorry you feel all that.
For what it's worth, I feel I understand. The story certainly didn't "need" epilogues, and it's stronger without them.
I'm a sentimental type who adopts whatever he writes. I write something, I want to post it no matter how mixed my thoughts are. Because somewhere out there, someone is going to enjoy a work I created. And that is a good thing.
Hence the note at the beginning, "If you don't like these, ignore them." I know it's a pussyfoot thing to say, but it was the best compromise I could think of between my competing desires to leave alone and press forward.
I apologize for having caused consternation.
3879581 Don't apologise. Amazingly, people seem to have forgotten on here that they don't necessarily have to read something. Epilogues are optional. Likewise if you don't like a fic, don't read it. I swear that social networking has gotten too many people used to using downvotes and snarky commentary instead of just walking away.
Hmm... so he's alive, but still holding onto his beliefs, or at least attempting to even after Celestia told him otherwise.
So, with a punctured heart, even after the repair, he's now going to rely on quite a few ponies to help him out of necessity, not becasue
he 'deserves' to be treated that way.
3877876 I'm with you there, Trev.
While I am pretty firmly in the "It didn't need an epilogue" camp I must say they were entertaining.
After reading them I hands down preferred the first one, given it's more logical conclusion and the all to mortal interactions of the Sisters.
But as I thought about it, I really enjoyed the second one as well. It follows the same character and style so it feels far more complete than the other did. While I might not have enjoyed the content as much it "fits" a lot better.
But, all and all, one thing is certain. I can't really dislike either of them...even if I'm trying.
I loved it, but I do wish I knew what the letters read...
I interpreted from your comments that someone or someone(s) have pressured you into writing an epilogue.
Despite the fact that you feel neither of these epilogues were particularly inspired, the solid workmanship of the original fic is present in both. Not too shabby, if I say so myself.
I feel like I should treat the epilogues separately, so...
Epilogue (A) kept with the tone of the original chapter, but dealt more with the feelings of the lunar sisters about how they feel about the attitudes they observed in Bluebood and ponies who held similar views. Obviously, you addressed this in the second epilogue as well, but it was a bit more intimate in this epilogue. It would be hard to do it as intimately if Blueblood hadn't died, so I feel that the heavy tone of the first fic fit well with it. I liked it.
Epilogue (B), as stated above, also dealt with how Celestia felt about such attitudes. But it was more concerned with finding ways to put it into perspective for Blueblood to understand. Of course, it also addressed some of the other subtle themes that you introduced in the first fic. It was lighter in tone, but just as heavy in meaning as the other two pieces. It was more similar stylistically to the first fic, because it used Blueblood's perspective as the primary narrative tool, which was very nice. I liked it.
To sum it up, I would have been perfectly happy with the orginal fic as it was, but I certainly have no complaints with the two additions. If nothing else, you showed that whether or not you are truly inspired at any particular moment, you don't let that get in the way of turning out a solid piece.
Do I sense a Doctor Who reference? Also this should become a fanfic itself, sort of like a sequel.
I liked this epilogue more.
This story is so good.....
.....But now I want to know what the letters were about, and what he does afterwards...
Both epilogues seemed pretty strong, though I'm not entirely sure they were necessary. It is nice that they're there, I suppose.
I usually prefer the darker/sadder ending to many fics. In this case, however, I found that Epilogue B was my favourite. I've also seen a few people complaining about the use of epilogues in this fic, but honestly I'd have felt a sense of longing if you hadn't made one, and I'm exceptionally grateful that you did, even if there's two to choose between (though I'd choose the second one any day).
Either way, this is the best fic I've read since the beginning of this year, and most likely the best fic I've read in at least 6 months, if not more.
Liked and faved.
3879581
Don't worry about it man.
Just stating how I feel.
Still, aside from the second Epilogue, this was a fantastic story.
~Skeeter The Lurker
Good job... I enjoyed both endings... And the thought that BB would going into farming... Just that very thought means he mite have learned something... something important...
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I— took the right.
3880563
Thank you for your words.
The speculation that I was pressured by someone into doing this, I can clarify: No, no one was pressuring me into doing this.
Except for me.
It is perhaps odd to admit this - both given the positive response it gleaned and the fact I created it - but I was not overly enamored with the way the story ended. Whether it's "good" or not is up to a reader to decide, but I personally had mixed feelings towards it.
The reason for this is simple: If you interpret the story as the big fight against evil, then yes it was finished. And it was, in my mind, "good." But if the focus is placed more on Blueblood than the events, the story's ending becomes a lot more iffy. Because nothing's changed. No resolution is given to his misplaced faith or sense of self-worthlessness. He's a man in need of a therapist and an anti-depressant regimen. I felt very awkward when people spoke of how much they liked my "positive" interpretation of him.
It is this sense of "not being done yet" that drove the epilogues. For the first one, to put it crudely, death is the resolution. And with a sudden death comes regret, anger, and a guilty effort to move on.
The second felt a bit jarring on the re-read, but that came with the territory. After a story about hopelessness and a short about death, something that is hopeful will come off as a very different animal. I wanted it clear that Blueblood was wrong, and I wanted him to be made to see it.
The ambivalent wording in my comments and notes emerged from empathy with those who would not well receive them. In fairness, a story about "The Fateful Moment" is stronger without an epilogue, the epilogues carried a different tone than the story, and they're really not about the true plot. Hence my indication that people could take it or leave it: It's not part of the story, it's AFTER the story. They seem more fitting as a brief sequel fic, but that struck me as silly. The dissent was disheartening and did little to unmix complicated feelings, and this was reflected in my quickly-written responses. But I have never pretended to be Alfred Tennyson and my "take it or leave it" attitude was expressed at the beginning, so I feel no guilt about "ruining" this soon-forgotten piece of internet fanfiction. I am more satisfied for having written these.
To get poetic on you: "Glory" gave life to the character. In the epilogues, I took responsibility for that life. Simultaneously for better and worse. Even though I don't consider them to be part of the story.
Hope that solved your riddle. Thank you for your time.
As you probably knew, no matter what you did, in extending the story, you lost most of the raw emotional power that was what made it so effective.
That said, of the two, I find the second to have retained slightly more of the power, albeit in a far less... primal form.
I do believe that, if we wanted Blueblood dead, we should be left with the originial, whereas this second form explores a more ... philosophical problem.
3878051
I'm sorry, how does he alter Blueblood's character in any way in the first chapter? Throughout the story, he's reinforcing the idea that Celestia is the only thing with any worth. There is someone threatening the one thing he beleives to actually matter, and he is responding with wrath of the self-assured righteous. Anyone would. So I fail to see how it _alters_ his character. Rather it seems to justify what we already know of him.
If anything,, it's this second epilogue that allows him to grow some as a character, what with Celestia explaining to him precisely why his almost nihilistic beliefs were in error, and his changing accordingly.
As for 'making him something beyond' - are you sure you're not confusing that with 'a character I empathised with strongly' where you are used to his being 'a two-dimensional jerk', or, on rare occasions, simply 'a character'?
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I will (hesitantly, because I despise internet debate) point out that I did indicate in my note that if one did not want epilogues, they should simply pass. I was not blind to potential controversy, and hoped to appease all parties. In the course of attempting to please everyone, I clearly have caused consternation to myself and others.
I would like you to know that your own words are forgiven. Thank you.
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Hey, you're sticking to your guns.
Something to respect, really.
~Skeeter The Lurker
Are the epilogues intended as a piece or as a choice? It seems pretty clearly that Blueblood dies in the first, is all.
That said, I liked both of them.
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A choice, I suppose. Either, both, or none, whatever the reader likes.
I can't really say one was better than the other since they both were well done.
There's something about Blueblood. He's just so intensely unlikeable, so unrepentantly asinine, that any story where he manages to do something useful is going to be memorable. In this case, it's downright epic.
Magnificent work. Thank you for it.
I came by this work by way of Goombasa's excellent dramatic reading. I loved it everything about it! The villain was great, Blueblood's nihilism was great, his monologue was great. All the endings work, and you're not wrong for wanting to leave it ambiguous.
Keep up the good work!