• Member Since 17th Nov, 2013
  • offline last seen Jun 27th, 2015

Herr Director

I am ze Grammar Nazi. Zhat is all you need to know.


It is 1945, nearing the end of World War 2. An army has made it's way to Berlin, and the city has fallen. But this is not the army of the Soviets. This is an army of Equestria, seeking to end the war of attrition by stamping out the human pestilence. Wehrmacht Hauptmann Herman Schott stands atop the Reichstag as the last human in Europe, waiting for the Equestrian to claim him as well. With nothing but the captured flags of conquered nations, a Luger, and some stick grenades, can he make a final tribute to humanity that will not be forgotten?

A simple one shot of a conversion bureau story.

My Little Pony belongs to Hasbro.

UPDATE: Added Der Koniggratzer Marsch acompaniment video as an afterthought.

Chapters (1)
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Comments ( 80 )

Wow, that was one of the coolest things I ever read. The way you wrote Schott and his plan were awesome to read. Thank you for writing such an amazing story :3. I hope to see more of your work someday, keep up the good work.

I am most flattered. Thank you for those kind words.

That was awesome!

this is not a story of a hate group
this is not a story of justification
this is a story of men and the real humanity

Clumsy exposition, a literal, unsubtle comparison of ponies to Nazis, evil-for-no-reason Celestia, and a weak ending.

I don't have enough downvotes to express my disgust.


I am genuinely sorry you feel that way. Unfortunately, there is not much I can do for you at this point but accept your criticism for future stories. That is all.

For the Glory of Colossus,
Herr Director

awesome story but please extend it so there are others in extream hiding and he survived the fall. vive la revolution!!!

This was really intended to be a one shot... but I appreciate the positive reception!

Nazis or not this was Epic!

Heil Der Menschheit!

I can't fault a story for what it does best, which in this case is the German language spicing up the text. Apart from that... Have you read Ten Minutes? Your story is very similar to that one. If not, read it. If yes, read it again now.

Done? Okay.

You cannot have love without hate. I am by no means saying that hate is good, but it is necessary, and it cannot be fully destroyed.

There are lots of people on this site and everywhere in the world who think like this, and that's just fine. But why does Schott say this? Is he a late-twenties armchair philosopher? And Celestia... Why does the opinion of this last human matter to her? Now what happens in Ten Minutes: The human says nothing. He fought his fight and was about to die, nothing to say to some alien leader he'd never met before. And Evil-Celestia? She's just going about her business as usual, casually mentioning that it's the last human on Earth.

Which one of these is more plausible? Which one doesn't make you roll your eyes in wonder and disbelief?

Going out with a bang is always the best.
Like that guy riding the nuke in that old world war 2 movie.

This story was great, and I'm guessing that the conversion bureau is ponies killing humans.
I knew you were good with the german language and history, but this knocks it out of the ball park for me.
Great job

While I am not a fan of TCB Ponies winning against the Human and Nazis, this was great though if I wouldn't mind seeing something along the lines of this.

Now that is how you go down fighting, a final sacrifice, humanity is safe, and a hero is remembered

*Cold war
It was made over a decade after the war.

Also, would read, but Nazis.

Bravo good sir bravo

Tokai #18 · Jan 7th, 2014 · · 1 ·


Blah blah blah cry more

3709733 That was rude :facehoof:

3748799 Your avatar made me play RF 2 today :rainbowlaugh:

I know I've already replied to your comment, but there's something that's been bothering me for a while, and I need to get some answers. Let's recap.

Clumsy exposition, a literal, unsubtle comparison of ponies to Nazis, evil-for-no-reason Celestia, and a weak ending.

I don't have enough downvotes to express my disgust.

I don't know if you realize this, that was actually rather hurtful. I don't know where you got the whole "Ponies are Nazis" idea. But I digress. The whole point is, perhaps if you wish to be so blunt about my story, at least tell me in private. None the less, I have kept your comment for archival purposes, since I am a reasonable person. If you disagree on THAT, then I would very much appreciate a PM explaining how and why.

I appreciate your opinion regardless.

-Herr Director

I'm a commie and this was awesome!

3709733 Why are you so fucking angry lately?




excellent history

but no conversion story where we win???

or cooperate with the ponies

You made Nazis both badass and relatable. My god. This nearly brings a tear to my eye, :pinkiesad2: especially since it involves WWII my second favorite war. Good job. :ajsmug:

3715643 Gotta love Dr. Strangelove! :rainbowdetermined2: ... get it? cuz y'know... :derpyderp2:

4016638 Glad you enjoyed it. I have always found it interesting how Hitler managed to bring Germany out of the ashes of World War 1. After that... things went downhill for the Nazis as they entered the Holocaust phase. :twilightoops:

None the less, they still make an interesting topic in stories like this.

Nazis should be neither of those things.
They should be dead or dieing at all times.

4016903 Meh, it was just a good story. Truly I agree.

4045625 Let's face it, a Shutzestaffel Hauptsturmfuhrer standing up to Xenolestia would be flat out hypocritical.

4045892 Kid, I like your style. Let's go out there and change the world! Like Hitler tried to do, only without antisemitism, vegetarianism, and good social skills with children.

4016638 The Wehrmacht deserves respect. They weren't the monstrous rabid dogs that the SS were, they were just fighting for their country like any military force. And let's face it, these guys were good to have taken the entirety of Western Europe and still be able to reach Moscow - granted, the latter was their downfall, but that was Hitler's idea, not their generals'.

I'm impressed. You managed to humanize one of the most hated groups and people to exist but you did it in a way that doesn't downplay the atrocities they did.

The writing was a bit awkward in places but it didn't diminish the impact at the end.

I've noticed a sharp jump favorites on this story today. Is it because it's Hitler's death day anniversary?

EDIT: I've had an idea for a sequel to this story where Hauptmann Hoffman remembers Schott's sacrifice and leads a revolution against Celestia. Don't expect anything anytime soon, though. Any thoughts.

If I were the last one, I'd want an MG-34 or MG42, and probably an STG-44, not just a 9mm.

The story was added to a couple of group folders, making it appear in people's notification feeds. Including mine, of course.

4317868 yea plus a panzerfrost

Dude, I cant stop re-reading this.
I especially liked that you made Schott an innocent, completely oblivious to the horrible things that the SS did.
He was just a bad ass in a trench coat on the wrong side. :rainbowdetermined2:
The song is especially good, the last minute or so is really addictive. :rainbowwild:
While it's fine as, is a sequel might be okay if done well enough. :ajsmug:


4319868 Panzherfaust i think
3983532 Im leading the efort, look out for a fic called The Conversion Bureau: South America
Writing as much as i can but schools a bit heavy on me right now

4677808 Bout what the Panzherfaust or the fic?

It's beautiful!

Why are "real humanity" so ugly?


Nice fic by the way. I think Fegeline summoned the ponies.

4858077 Oh Hai Got Rootbeer

4858077 Gunche: Mein Fuhrer, ponies are attacking the Reichstag!

Hitler: Oh thanks for the notice Captain Obvious! It's very embarrassing to have your ass kicked by ponies you know. I bet Fegelien was the one who brought them here to make a fool of me. Well now they're gonna kill us all! He took it too far! Go throw Fegelien to the ponies at once! FEGELIEN! FEGELIEN, FEGELIEN!

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