Plums Deify
“Congrats again, Twi!” Spike said, throwing his arms around the slumped alicorn and ruffling her dress. She didn’t so much as flinch from her slow trot. “I still can’t believe that you’re a princess. It’s so awesome!”
Twilight smiled under half-lidded eyes. “Thanks, Spike, but you’ve already told me that eight times tonight. You can stop now.”
“Well, you can hardly blame the darling, Twilight,” Rarity said from her side, sidestepping to avoid a passing dancer. “We’re all so very proud and excited for you!”
“Darn tootin’!” Applejack said, beaming from Twilight’s other side. “You deserve all the praise you get tonight and more, so don’t go complainin’ about it.” The group of four arrived at a small, round table. They all settled into their seats. Spike unlatched himself from Twilight and took a seat between her and Rarity.
“Don’t get me wrong,” Twilight said. “I really do appreciate all of it, but it gets tiring after everypony congratulating me all night. So can we please just agree to no more princess-talk for tonight? I’m perfectly happy to just sit and relax with all my friends.”
Rarity smiled. “Well if that’s what you want, dear, of course.” She took a small sip of punch from her glass. “Speaking of our friends, where are the others?”
“Looks like they’re still out on the dance floor,” Applejack said, gesturing a hoof forward. Pinkie Pie jumped high above the crowd like a rubber ball bouncing in rhythm with the music. Her hat bobbed on her head, somehow not falling off. Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy danced together near the edge of the crowd.
Spike twiddled his thumbs together. “Hey, uh, Rarity? Do you wanna dance?”
Rarity smiled at him and patted his frills gently. “Oh, no thank you, Spike. I believe I’ve had my fill of dancing for this evening—don’t want to sweat too much in this beautiful dress, you know.”
“Oh, okay,” Spike said, falling into a slouch.
Frowning, Rarity bit her lip and scanned the room for a moment. Her eyes lit up and she gestured to a nearby table. “Spike, why don’t you go ask Sweetie Belle? I’m sure she would love to dance with you.”
Spike glanced ahead. The Cutie Mark Crusaders all sat together around a small table. Sweetie Belle and Apple Bloom giggled as Scootaloo made some wild gestures around herself. Spike turned to Rarity’s shining face. “Uh, sure. Alright.” He hopped down from his chair and walked over to the table.
Twilight, Rarity, and Applejack all smiled as Spike approached Sweetie Belle. He rubbed one arm with the opposite claw and gestured to the dance floor with his head. Gentle flames lit behind Sweetie Belle’s cheeks as she smiled and nodded. Spike took her by the hoof and led her to the crowd. Apple Bloom and Scootaloo giggled as they watched the pair go.
“Isn’t that just precious?” Rarity said, blinking a bit quickly. “Sweetie Belle’s growing up so fast.”
“So is Spike,” Twilight said, smiling wide at the dragon. “He’s so much more mature than he used to be.”
Applejack smiled a bit as she looked back at the Cutie Mark Crusaders’ table. Apple Bloom lifted her dress and looked at her flank as though she’d been expecting a giggle-at-your-dancing-friend cutie mark, but her face fell at the sight of her blank coat. “Won’t be long before them three finally get their cutie marks,” Applejack said. She chuckled. “I still remember back when they started that little club—”
“What are we looking at?” The three mares turned to find Princess Celestia smiling over at Spike and Sweetie Belle along with them. She turned to meet their wide eyes. “Sorry. I do have a way of sneaking up on ponies. Do you mind if I join you?”
Twilight smiled. “Not at all, Princess! Please.” She gestured to Spike’s empty seat.
Celestia chuckled as she pulled up her chair. “Please, Twilight. You’re a princess now too. Just call me Celestia.”
Twilight blinked. “Sorry… Celestia. We were just watching Spike and Sweetie Belle dance.” She turned back to look at the dance floor just as the song came to an end. A moment later, a slow, melancholic cello filled the room. Spike and Sweetie Belle stared at each other blankly for a few moments, nervously glancing around as mares and stallions pulled each other close. Eventually, Spike held out a claw, and Sweetie Belle gave him her hoof not a moment later.
A little squeak lifted from the table. All the others turned to look at Rarity who was holding a hoof to her mouth. “Would you all excuse me for a moment? I need to fetch my camera.” She stood, hastily bowed to Celestia, and cantered off into a nearby hall.
Celestia looked back at Spike as he led Sweetie Belle in slow circles. “You’ve done very well by him, Twilight,” she said. “I still remember the day you hatched him. You were so worried about helping him grow.”
A faint pink crossed Twilight’s cheeks. “I couldn’t have done it without your help, Princess. And the rest of my family, the castle staff…”
“You really need to learn how to take a compliment, sugarcube,” Applejack said, smirking. Twilight rolled her eyes.
“As I recall,” Celestia continued, moving to look at Twilight, “that day was important for more than one reason.” Twilight followed Celestia’s gaze to the area on her dress where her flank would be. She smiled.
“Hey, Princess,” Applejack said. “Speaking o’ that, I don’t think I’ve ever heard the story of how you got your cutie mark.” Applejack grinned and tipped her plumed hat. “I bet that’s one doozy of a story.”
“I’m sure it is, Applejack,” Celestia said, keeping her smile straight. “I wish I could remember it.”
Both Twilight and Applejack quirked their eyebrows. “You don’t remember how you got your cutie mark?” Twilight said. “But I could’ve sworn you told me that story as a filly! Something about being the first pony to ever raise the sun by herself, right?”
“Truth be told, Twilight, that was just my best guess. You were so curious about it back then that I just had to tell you something. I forgot the actual story quite a long time ago.”
“Wow,” Twilight breathed, looking blankly at the floor. “I can’t imagine ever forgetting the day I got my cutie mark…”
“Me neither,” Applejack said, glancing back at the Crusaders’ table.
Celestia shrugged. “I have lived a very long life, and I have made countless wonderful memories.” She turned to look across the room. Luna greeted passing ponies from the main entryway with a warm smile. Celestia smiled in kind. “Some memories are more important than others.”
Twilight followed Celestia’s gaze. Luna met her stare briefly and nodded. Twilight nodded back and panned her eyes across the room. She stopped when she saw her parents, moving with the lethargic song in each other’s embrace. Her father muttered something, and her mother rolled her eyes over a wry smile. A dull ringing built in Twilight’s ears as she watched.
Her attention shifted sideways to Shining Armor and Cadance, moving in perfect sync with the music’s muffled tones. Cadance had her eyes closed and her head pressed against Shining’s shoulder as she held him close. They passed in front of the setting sun and—for just a split second—Shining Armor appeared as nothing more than a silhouette in Cadance’s hooves. Twilight watched with a small frown.
“Twilight?”
Twilight blinked and turned to see Rarity lifting an eyebrow at her from behind a tripod-mounted camera. “Are you quite alright? I said your name several times just now.”
Twilight shook her head. “Sorry, Rarity. I guess I just spaced out for a second. Did you need something?”
Rarity smiled. “Yes, darling. I asked if you would be so kind as to step out of the frame for a moment.” She gestured over Twilight’s shoulder, and Twilight looked to see Sweetie Belle resting her head against Spike’s shoulder, eyes closed, as they moved in slow circles around each other.
Twilight blinked. “Oh… uh, sure.” She stood and moved a few steps away. She shuffled her hooves and threw a look over her shoulder as Rarity finished preparing the camera. Curtains swayed in front of an open balcony on the far side of the crowd.
“Actually,” Twilight said, “could you all excuse me for a minute? I think I need some fresh air.”
Celestia looked down at her. A soft shine clung to Twilight’s brow, and a frown creased her face. Celestia matched it. “Is everything alright, Twilight?”
“Fine!” Twilight said, whipping around and giving Celestia a brittle smile. “It’s just, uh, getting a little too warm and stuffy in here is all. Can’t sweat too much in this beautiful dress! Right, Rarity?” Before she even got a reply, Twilight quickly scurried off into the crowd.
A bright flash went off behind her, filling the room for but a fraction of a second. She glanced to her right as she moved through the crowd. Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie laughed with each other by the dessert table, and Fluttershy stood next to a brown stallion on the far wall, smiling as she spoke to him. Twilight refocused her attention ahead.
Several nods, greetings, and thank-yous later, Twilight reached the far side of the crowd and stepped out onto the balcony. Immediately she pulled in a deep breath, absorbing the crisp, floral scent of the garden below. A cool breeze moved across her, billowing her mane a bit. She looked forward across the courtyard and caught sight of a tall, thick tree. Bright golden apples hung from its branches, shining in the light of the sunset.
Beyond the tree, Twilight could make out the statue garden. The shadowed forms of stone figures brooded there in stark contrast to the bright chirps of the nearby songbirds. Names for some of the statues jumped from Twilight’s memory, but there were others she couldn’t quite identify.
Twilight looked to her left at the blazing horizon. The landscape sat in her mind’s eye like a vivid oil painting. She looked to the right at the midnight blue sky. Shadows loomed over the world like ancient colossi. She looked up at the purple dome above her, where the sun and moon clashed. Despite herself, she managed a grin and a chuckle.
“Twilight.” Her attention snapped to her side. A brown unicorn with a gray mane and beard stood next to her, smiling up at the sky. He huffed through his nose. “You know, some might call this moment poetic.” He shifted his smile onto Twilight. “Although, I hardly think that’s why you’re out here.”
Twilight blinked. “Uh… I’m sorry. Do I know you?”
The stallion chuckled. “All too well, Princess. Perhaps this will jog your memory.” He blinked, and his eyes came back stark yellow with mismatched red irises.
Twilight flinched. “Discord?”
With a swish of his tail, the stallion flashed bright white and grew into a taller, much more recognizable form. Discord stretched his arms above his head with a groan. “I’ll have to have a chat with Celestia about that disguise,” he said. “I feel much better au naturel. Seriously, I’m not that off-putting, am I?”
Twilight just stared at him, bemused.
“Don’t act so surprised to see me here,” Discord said, rolling his eyes and throwing her a deadpan look. “You didn’t actually think I would miss this, did you?”
Twilight blinked. “Uh… I guess I never really thought about it. To be honest, Discord, I didn’t think you cared about my coronation at all.” She smiled a little. “Thanks for coming. I’m glad to see—”
“Oh, don’t flatter yourself,” Discord said, reclining into the air and admiring the end of his talon nonchalantly. “I’d much rather be spending the evening in my suite—the weather there is very nice this time of year, you know? But even I can’t argue with free dessert!” A fat slice of cake appeared in his talon. His mouth opened wide and he threw the whole piece down his throat. He licked his lips and smiled at Twilight.
She looked back at him blankly.
After a moment in silence, Discord hunched over and sighed. “Alright, and maybe Fluttershy suggested I should be here as a show of good will.” His eyes suddenly widened. “Oh, congratulations, by the way.”
“Uh… thanks?” At that, the air fell dead. Twilight stared at Discord, and Discord stared back with an innocent smile. Over time, though, his smile waned. He rolled his talon through the air, eyeballing her. Twilight scuffed her hoof against the balcony and turned to look over the railing. “Er… nice night, isn’t it?”
Discord appeared in front of her wearing an irritated frown. “Seriously? You’re trying to make small talk with me?”
Twilight stared at him wordlessly.
Discord let off a heavy sigh and pulled his paw across his face. He beckoned her with his talon and said, “Come on. Out with it.”
Twilight blinked. “Out with what?”
“Oh, please. It doesn’t take a psychiatrist to see that you’re upset about something. Can we please just skip to the part where you tell me what it is and I try my best to care?”
Twilight scowled at him. “Not exactly the best way to get someone to talk to you about their problems, Discord.”
He shrugged. “Just being honest.”
Twilight slanted her eyes. “Whatever. Besides, I’m not upset about anything anyway.” She turned from Discord to face the sunset in the distance.
A flash went off behind her. She glanced over her shoulder and turned around fully when she came eye to eye with a shoddy wooden replica of herself as a marionette. She raised an eyebrow at it.
“Look at me!” said the puppet in a scratchy falsetto. “I’m Twilight Sparkle, and I’m so happy to be a pretty pony princess! I’m just gonna spend the most important night of my life alone on a cold balcony. Don’t worry, though. I’m not upset! I just felt like being an introvert for a while!”
Twilight glared upwards at Discord as he pulled the strings and spoke through the corner of his mouth. “I don’t sound like that,” she said, turning back to the sunset. “And even if I was upset, why would you care? You didn’t even want to be here in the first place!”
Another light went off behind her, but she didn’t turn to look. Discord’s voice said, “Just because I’m not perfect yet doesn’t mean I haven’t learned anything from reading those letters of yours, you know.”
Twilight looked over her shoulder. “You’ve been reading my friendship reports?”
Discord nodded. “At Celestia’s request, yes. Although some of them were terribly cheesy. Especially that one with the bit about you and all of your friends looking up at the same rainbow.” A wry grin grabbed his face. “That one even tasted of gorgonzola.”
Twilight’s horn flared to life and she rounded on him, teeth gritted. “You’ve been eating them?!”
Eyes wide, Discord recoiled. “No, of course not! It was just a joke! Your letters are still in one, non-digested piece.” He reached behind him and peeled a piece of parchment from the wall, holding it up to her. “See?”
The glow faded from Twilight’s horn. She groaned and turned away, resting her chin on the railing. “Just go away, Discord! I’m not in the mood for this.”
Allowing the silence to punctuate the moment, Discord eventually shrugged, crumpled the parchment, and threw it off the balcony. “Alright, I tried. If you don’t think your problem is something I can help you with, that’s your business.” He snapped his talons and reverted to the form of a brown stallion. Without another word, he walked back past the curtains into the room beyond.
Silence fell across the balcony again. Twilight looked ahead at the darkening horizon. Black smudges of mountains sat in the distance. She squinted her eyes and just barely made out a twinge of colour rippling through the northern skies. She sighed and let her eyes settle on the courtyard below.
“Good evening, Twilight.”
Twilight pulled her attention back as Celestia stepped up to her side. She offered a tiny smile and said, “Oh, good evening, Prin… uh, Celestia.”
Celestia smiled back at her. “I believe I just saw Discord leaving the balcony. He wasn’t bothering you too much, I hope.”
Twilight shook her head. “No, he was just… well, I’m not actually sure what he was doing. He kept asking if I was upset.” She looked away and mumbled, “As if he actually cared.”
“I know Discord’s still quite rough around the edges, Twilight,” Celestia said, “but don’t discount him so easily. Friendship is not something easily learned, especially for someone who didn’t have a single friend in over a thousand years.”
“I guess,” Twilight said, hanging her head a bit. “Sorry, Princess.”
“Don’t worry about it.” Celestia dropped her smile and turned to stare at the horizon. Twilight followed suit shortly, and they stood together as the wind whistled gently through their ears.
“So,” Celestia said eventually, “are you?”
Twilight turned to Celestia with a raised eyebrow. “Am I what?”
Celestia met her gaze. “Are you upset over something?”
Twilight’s eyes widened to dinner plates. “Oh, no! Of course not, Princess! What could I possibly have to be upset about? This day has been so wonderful. It’s… it’s the most memorable night of my life…” Her words came out as though she had only just realized them.
Celestia smiled. “I’m glad to hear it. You have so much to be proud of tonight, and still so much to look forward to.”
“Yeah,” Twilight said, nodding and smiling a glass smile. “Can’t wait!”
They turned together back to the horizon. “That being said,” Celestia continued, “don’t hesitate to come to me with any problems you may have. You are bound to have many questions, and I am more than willing to answer any of them.”
Twilight blinked. She turned her head to regard the sun one more time as it waved goodbye over the horizon. The orange light caught her eyes, making them shine. “Actually,” she said, looking up to Celestia, “there is something I would like to talk to you about.”
Celestia smiled down at her. “Yes?”
Silence hung between them for a good while, but Celestia’s smile never wavered. Twilight shuffled her hooves and looked at the ground through the corner of her eye. “Uh… what I want to ask you about…”
Twilight looked past Celestia at the rising moon. “Well, can you…” She noticed the faint orange of sunset bathing the balcony around them. “What I mean to say is… am I…” She looked at the silhouetted mountains to the north and the faint auroras dancing across their peaks. She froze there for a minute.
“Twilight?”
She pulled her eyes back to Princess Celestia who was still smiling down at her. “What is it?” she asked.
Twilight blinked once. She pulled her body straight, her wings ruffling against her dress. “Celestia,” she began, “am I…” The next word stopped halfway up her throat. It fell limp and tumbled back into her stomach, solidifying there. She sighed, gave up, and said, “Can I stay here for the night?”
Celestia blinked. “Pardon?”
“Er… well, it’s just been a really exhausting day is all, and the last thing I feel like doing is taking a long train ride back to Ponyville. Heh, so… uh, can my friends and I stay here for the night, maybe?”
It took a moment, but Celestia’s mouth melted back into its small grin. “Of course, Twilight. You and your friends are welcome to stay at the castle as long as you please. It’s partially yours now, anyway.”
Twilight chuckled a little. “Heh, I guess it is, isn’t it?”
“Is that all you had to ask me, Twilight?”
Twilight nodded. “Y-yup! That’s all.”
They held each other’s gaze for a few moments. The night had fallen upon them completely, and the wind was picking up force. Celestia nodded and said, “Very well. Let’s head back inside then, shall we? I believe you have a little dragon to tease about his first slow dance.”
Twilight laughed. Celestia made her way through the curtains again, and Twilight followed closely behind, leaving the balcony in thick silence.
***
“For the last time, Twilight,” Spike said, shoving the door open, “it wasn’t a slow dance! We were just dancing, and it just happened to be slow. That’s all!”
Twilight giggled. “Of course, Spike. Whatever you say.” The smirk never lifted from her face as she strolled past him into the moonlit room beyond.
Spike sighed and turned away from her. “Rarity,” he said, “you believe me, right?” Rarity simply blushed, giggled, and patted his spines as she followed Twilight inside. Spike groaned, but he followed suit without another word.
“Whoa!” Rainbow Dash cried as she soared through the door herself. She gaped up at the night sky through a window which reached to the top of the dome-shaped room. “Is this really where you stayed while you were living in Canterlot, Twi?”
“Only when I was staying at the castle,” Twilight said, stepping up the staircase into the loft. “Most of the time I stayed with my parents, but this was my home away from home.” She smiled fondly at the great golden hourglass which still watched over the courtyard below. Its white sands twinkled like magic as the grains tumbled through. “I do have a lot of good memories here.”
“It’s extravagant, Twilight!” Rarity said, beaming around at the ornate decor that rimmed the room. “I would give up my boutique in a heartbeat for a suite as opulent as this. However could you give it up, Twilight?”
Twilight winced. “I mean, it is nice, but I’m still just as happy with my home in Ponyville.”
“Golly, sugarcube!” Applejack said, staring at the room in awe. “Normally I ain’t much for the fancypants Canterlot decor, but this is plum amazin’! A room fit for a princess, I reckon.” She tipped her hat.
Blinking, Twilight looked at her wings as though just noticing them for the first time. “Yeah,” she said, giving them a bit of a sad look, “I guess—”
“Wowie zowie!” Pinkie Pie said, bouncing into the room. “Look at this place! We can have a whole nother alicorn party in here. Not just an alicorn party, though. An alicorn slumber party! Whaddya say, girls?”
“I think I’ve had more than enough partying for tonight, Pinkie Pie,” Fluttershy said, closing the door behind her. She turned to the group with droopy-dog eyes and a warm smile. “I think I’m just ready to get some sleep. It’s been such a big day already, even though it flew by so quickly.”
Twilight frowned a little. No one seemed to notice.
“Aw, come on, Fluttershy!” Pinkie said, hopping up onto the hourglass. “Live a little! The night is young—it’s not even midnight!”
At that moment, the last speck of silvery sand trickled through the hourglass. The timepiece glowed a faint hue and flipped itself, launching Pinkie across the room and right into Spike. The sands started flowing back through the funnel, clinking tinily against the glass basin.
“Guess that means it is midnight, huh?” Rainbow said, smirking at the lump of pink, purple, and green.
“I’m honestly surprised that enchantment still works,” Twilight said, standing transfixed by the flipped hourglass. “I cast it a pretty long time ago.”
“Shoot, Twi,” Applejack said, slinging a hoof around her friend. “With your magical talent, I wouldn’t be surprised if that thing kept turnin’ forever.”
Twilight blinked.
“P-Pinkie?” Spike said, still trapped beneath her. “Are you gonna get up anytime soon?”
“Nope!” Pinkie said, squeezing her hooves tighter around him. “It was a destiny hug! They last the longest out of any hug I know.”
“Yes, well, destiny hugs aside,” Rarity said, “I must agree with Fluttershy. I believe it’s about time we all turned in for the evening. It has been quite a day.”
“I reckon you’re right,” Applejack said. She gathered up a nearby pillow and moved off towards one of the more comfortable-looking corners of the room. “Good night, y’all.”
“Good night,” the others chorused back, with one “Aw… fine” thrown into the mix.
Twilight made for her old bed—one that hadn’t been touched since she’d left for Ponyville, she assumed. She magicked off her dress and her crown, setting them both aside carefully. She settled a forlorn stare on her crown as it shimmered under the moonlight. An image of the sun flashed through her mind. She sighed and pulled her blankets away, climbing into bed.
“Uh… Twilight?”
“Hm?” Twilight turned to look over her bedside. She found Spike twiddling his thumbs and staring at his feet. “What is it, Spike?”
“Well… uh… there aren’t really any great places left to sleep, and my bed’s back home in Ponyville, so I was kinda hoping… uh…” He went silent and looked up at Twilight sheepishly.
Twilight smiled. She scooted closer to the adjacent wall and said, “Climb in.”
Spike beamed. He scurried into place next to her on the bed. Twilight replaced the blankets over them and turned to face Spike. She giggled. “Just like old times, huh?”
“Yeah,” Spike said over a yawn. His eyelids flickered gently, like candles in the wind. “Just like old times. Good night, Twi.”
“Good night, Spike,” Twilight said. She closed her eyes and savoured Spike’s nearby warmth.
“Oh, and, Twi?”
Her eyes opened halfway. She smiled and said, “Yeah, Spike?”
“Congrats again. I always knew you had what it took… to be a… princess…” And with one last yawn, he was in dreamland.
A frown creased Twilight’s face. She sighed and looked over at the hourglass glistening in the moonlight. She suddenly felt very cold. Very cold indeed.
***
If counting sheep was meant to make you fall asleep, counting grains of sand was liable to kill you.
Seven thousand nine hundred and fourteen grains later, Twilight still watched the hourglass mark the seconds as the night dwindled on. Occasionally she would shuffle herself beneath the blankets, but nothing put her mind at ease.
She twisted her body again, looking up at the moon. It looked back at her just as it did every night—just as it would every night for the rest of her life. It was a fixture. A rock—both literally and figuratively—that ponies could always count on to be there. It was a symbol of strength everlasting.
Much like the sun.
Twilight sniffed as she turned to face the wall. Her mind wandered back through the day’s events. They all blurred together now, with some notable exceptions—her speech on friendship, the group hug with her friends, and the very moment her crown had christened her head all rang out in her memory.
But something else lingered too. It wasn’t so much a fond warmth as a playful itch, desperate to be scratched. It poked and prodded her—it would poke and prod her even if she counted every grain of sand in Equestria.
If you don’t think your problem is something I can help you with…
She stared at the moon one more time, then she broke. She pushed the blankets from her body and awkwardly slid around Spike until she could reach the far bedside. As slowly as she dared, she stood up and trotted over to the doors. She magicked them open and stepped out into the brisk night.
“Princess?”
Twilight jolted and spun her head about. It took her one second to notice the guards standing on either side of the door—it took her three more seconds to realize they were addressing her. “Oh, uh, good evening,” she said.
After a moment, they remembered themselves and bowed to her. To Twilight, the bows felt like a sweater two sizes too large—awkward and warm. The guards rose, and one of them said, “Shouldn’t you be asleep, Princess? We assumed you’d gone to bed hours ago.”
“I couldn’t fall asleep. I had a lot on my mind.” She looked at each of the guards in turn, and then the thought struck her. “Actually… maybe it’s something you two could help me with. You don’t mind, do you?”
The other guard fumbled his tongue and said, “O-of course not, Princess! We live to serve you.” He bowed again.
The first guard glared at him past Twilight. He turned back to her and said, “How may we be of service, Your Highness?”
After just a hair of a moment, Twilight said, “I need you to take me somewhere.”
***
She knocked at the door.
“Come in!”
Twilight pushed the door inward, and her eyes followed a plum as it hovered past. “Twilight Sparkle?” Discord said from his place lounging in a painting of a crescent moon. “What a lovely surprise! Let me guess: you didn’t quite get your daily dose of Discord from our earlier conversation, so now you’re here for more?”
“Uh… something like that,” Twilight said. She slowly stepped onto the grassy carpet and shut the door behind her. “I thought you’d be asleep by now, actually.”
Discord waved his paw and blew a raspberry. “Hardly. I’ve had more than enough time to rest in the past thousand years, thank you very much.” He snapped his talons and appeared next to Twilight, wrapping an arm around her. He grinned and said, “However, I find it far more intriguing that you aren’t asleep, Princess.”
Twilight looked away. “I had something on my mind. That’s… uh… kinda why I’m here, actually.”
“Aha!” Discord shouted, making Twilight flinch away. “I knew something had you upset! And it looks like you’ve finally come to your senses in allowing me to help you.” He snapped his fingers, and suddenly Twilight and Discord were sitting opposite one another in the branches of a purple tree. Discord magicked himself a pair of glasses, a quill, and a notepad and said, “Now, why don’t you tell Discord what has your pretty little mind in such a tizzy?”
Twilight blinked. “Um… well…” Her wings shuffled against her back. “It’s a bit of a heavy subject. I’ll talk to you about it, but only if you promise to take it seriously.”
“Of course, of course,” Discord said, rolling his paw through the air. “Now let’s just get on with it, shall we?”
Twilight grimaced, but she remained sitting. “Well, ever since I spoke with Princess Celestia at the party earlier, I’ve been… wondering about something.” She shuffled her hooves, and Discord raised an eyebrow.
“Discord,” Twilight said, “what is it like to… live forever?”
Discord blinked. After a moment, he let out a strained groan and said, “Ugh, seriously? That’s what this is about? You’re losing sleep over an issue as painfully simple as immortality? How disappointing!”
Twilight scowled. “Fine. Don’t help.” She teleported down from the tree branch and slumped towards the door, shouldering the wayward plum out of her way. “I knew I should’ve just talked to the princesses about this.”
“Hold it right there.” Something grabbed her midsection and wheeled her around. She found herself inches from Discord’s stony face. “I didn’t say I wouldn’t help you, Twilight. And trust me, you’re much better off approaching me about this issue than anyone else. I’ll give you credit for that, at least.”
Twilight lifted an eyebrow. “What makes you say that?”
Discord smirked. “Never mind that for now. First, allow me to answer your question with another question. Do you actually know whether or not you’re immortal?”
Scuffing a hoof, Twilight looked away.
“Wonderful! Then I can be the first to tell you the good news.” The tree behind them exploded into confetti. Discord spread his arms wide, smiled broadly, and said, “Congratulations, Princess! As of yesterday, you are officially immortal! Welcome to the club. Please enjoy your complimentary lifetime supply of stopwatches.” In a flash, a winged party hat appeared over Twilight’s horn and little golden timepieces started raining around the room.
Even as Discord blew a party popper in her face, Twilight frowned. She closed her eyes and sighed. “So I really am going to live forever…”
Discord’s smile never waned. “Oh, my. You don’t seem particularly excited, Twilight. Could it be that you don’t actually want to live forever?”
“I’m… I’m really not sure. I guess… maybe not, but—”
A bright light flashed around Twilight, making her stumble a bit. A chill coursed through her at the same time. When the spots cleared from her vision, all of the party ornaments had vanished.
“Well, there you go!” Discord said, beaming. “You are no longer immortal. You’re very welcome.”
Twilight’s pupils dilated. “What?!”
“Good choice, if you ask me.” Discord plucked the plum from the air and took a bite of it. “Eternal life can get quite boring, really. All the dust is tiresome, and it adds a lot of needless confusion to the phrase ‘till death do us part.’”
“Discord!” Twilight roared, baring her teeth at him. “How could you—What were you—You can’t just—”
“But what’s the problem now, Princess? You don’t have to live forever anymore. Isn’t that exactly what you wanted?”
“I don’t know!” Twilight shouted. “That’s the whole point of this. I don’t know what to make of immortality. There’s a lot to consider!”
“Oh?” Discord smiled wryly. “Do tell.”
Twilight huffed, slanting her eyes at him. “Well… For instance! Living forever would mean being around for millennia to watch the world evolve and change. And I’d be there to help it evolve. That would be great.”
Discord snapped his talons, flashing a light around Twilight. “Okay, immortal it is.”
“But that’s not the only thing to consider!” Twilight said, glowering. “What if I’m not a good enough leader to help Equestria prosper over such a long span of time? Then maybe I shouldn’t live forever.”
A light flashed.
“Then again, Princess Celestia wouldn’t have made me immortal if she didn’t think I would make a good leader. She’s put a lot of trust in me… I’d hate to let her down…”
Flash.
“But what about my friends? I’d have to live on without them, and I’d never stop missing them. Spike would be around for a long time, and I’d have the other princesses, but it would still be really hard.”
Flash.
“Of course, that’s just another part of leadership, isn’t it? Being an example for everyone else by staying strong through everything? I’d like to be part of that example.”
Flash.
“But I don’t know if I could be as strong as Celestia or Luna—or Cadance.”
Flash.
Twilight glared up at Discord. “Would you stop that already?!”
Discord shrugged. “Just trying to help.”
“Well, you’re not! Don’t you even realize how drastically you’re changing my life with every snap of your stupid talons? You can’t just do that without seriously thinking about it!”
“Oh, but I can, Twilight,” Discord said, leaning back and rapping his fingers against each other. “And there are two reasons why.”
Twilight rolled her eyes. “Enlighten me.”
“Gladly!” A blackboard appeared next to Discord. Scrawled onto it in plain chalk was a simple equation: 1 = 0. “First, and most importantly,” Discord said, “it doesn’t actually matter whether you’re immortal or not. Never has, never will.”
Twilight blinked. She scowled and lifted the piece of chalk in her magic, scratching a line through the equals sign. “Of course it does!”
“…said the freshly minted alicorn to the thousand-year draconequus.” Discord pulled the plum from behind his ear and took another bite. “Very well, O Wise One. Give me one good reason why it matters whether your life is finite.”
“I just finished telling you—”
“Ah!” Discord pushed a talon into her lips. “I said one reason why it matters, not one way in which immortality is different from mortality. Try again.”
Twilight slanted her eyes and pushed Discord’s arm away. “Because I care. Happy?”
“Hmm…” Discord reclined, and a smaller facsimile of the nearby tree sprouted beneath him, molding to his body. He rolled his tongue around in his mouth, pushing it into each of his cheeks. Eventually he looked back at Twilight and asked, “Tell me: What are you having for breakfast in the morning?”
Twilight screwed up her face. “What does that—”
A menu hovered into Twilight’s vision. “Just answer the question.”
A groan forced itself from her. “Fine,” she said, tossing the menu over her shoulder. “Pancakes.”
Discord snapped his talons. A familiar light shone along with a gentle shiver through Twilight’s body. “You’re now immortal,” Discord said, lobbing the half-eaten plum at her. “What are you going to have for breakfast now?”
Twilight caught the plum in her magic and rocketed it back at him. He caught it without missing a beat. “Still pancakes. What is that supposed to prove?”
“Nothing yet, but you’ll see it soon enough. Let’s get a tad heavier, shall we?”
Lightning flashed, and suddenly Twilight stood in the middle of her home in Ponyville. She recoiled a bit and looked around. Discord was nowhere in sight. She called out, “Discord? What’s—”
“Twilight!”
The door slammed open, and a sobbing Spike ran in from the sun. Some words tried to spill out of his mouth, but the blubbering distorted it all. He threw himself around Twilight, pulling her as close as his little arms could.
Twilight blinked. “Spike! What in Equestria is wrong?!”
“Ev-ev-everythiiing!” Heated sobs and sniffles poured from him, and Twilight’s coat became drenched.
As Twilight reached for the right words or actions, everything fell into monochrome. Spike froze mid-cry, and an ambient hum built in the room.
“Here we have Spike,” Discord’s voice said, and so did its echo. “Poor little creature, he’s just had his heart broken by the one and only Rarity. In truth, everyone saw it coming, not that it matters in this particular moment. How will you console him?”
Twilight’s heart took a nosedive. “I…”
A familiar flash, and a familiar tingle through her veins. “Now that you’re no longer immortal, has the answer you were just about to give changed?”
Her eyes glistened a little. “Discord…”
The world morphed around her. Twilight felt her bones and joints rust and stiffen, and her skin sagged around her. When the scene around her came into focus, she felt extremely tired. Even so, the effect of seeing a tombstone before her—one engraved with three grayscale butterflies—wasn’t dampened in the slightest. Thunder cracked around her.
“And here…” Discord’s voice had fallen quiet. “Here we have Fluttershy, dead one week ago today. The community is still stricken with grief—you and me included. How will you cope?”
Twilight squeezed her eyes shut. “Stop,” came her hoarse voice.
The flash, and the shiver. Her body felt much less ancient. Much more familiar. “Now you’re immortal. Does it matter? She’s still dead, and you still have to cope. It’s only how long that’s changed.”
“I said stop!” The rain stopped pelting her. Twilight opened her eyes and saw Discord staring back at her. His mouth was a straight, etched line. He took another bite of the plum.
“You see, Twilight Sparkle? Your own lifespan didn’t matter in any of those circumstances. Would it have changed the future? Certainly: It would be longer. But in the moment, when has your lifespan ever mattered, hm? It won’t change how you react to daily life. It just adds more days.”
Staring at the floor, Twilight folded her ears back. “I… guess you have a point. But still… I have a lot to think about.”
“Well, that’s your business!” Twilight looked up to see Discord smiling again. His voice was back to its silky beat as he said, “You wanted advice, and I gave it. It isn’t my fault if it wasn’t something as stereotypical as what one of your precious princesses would give. Speaking of which…” Discord raised one eyebrow until it stopped well above his face. “Why didn’t you go to one of them first?”
Twilight shuffled her hooves. “I was afraid they’d be disappointed in me.”
“Whatever for?”
Twilight looked past Discord at the moon and sighed. “They all make being a princess—being immortal—look so… easy! They’re all so strong, and they all have some sort of permanent importance to this world. Celestia has the sun. Luna has the moon. Cadance has the Crystal Empire. I don’t have any examples of my strength in leadership, and I didn’t want to disappoint them by admitting I was afraid.”
“Come on, even I can see how ridiculous all of that is!”
Twilight looked up at him.
Discord took the last bite of his plum, smirking as he did. “Don’t look at me like that. I can’t spell out everything for you, no matter how incredibly wise I am. Consider your lesson quota filled for the day, and contemplate that last thing for yourself.”
Despite herself, Twilight smirked too. She shook her head. “I should’ve expected as much.”
“You really should have.” Discord threw the plum core over his shoulder, and it popped out of existence.
Something clicked in Twilight’s memory, and her eyes shot wide. “Oh, what was the other reason?”
“Hm?”
“Back when I told you that you can’t just change my lifespan like that without thinking about it first. You said there were two reasons that you could. What was the second one?”
“Oh, that?” Discord rolled his eyes. “Easy: It’s because I wasn’t actually affecting your lifespan at all.”
Twilight blinked. “Huh?”
“Truth be told, I actually have no idea whether or not you’re immortal—nor whether that sister-in-law of yours is, either. I was just putting on a light show, trying to prove a point.” Discord lifted his shoulders and smiled. “Even my magic has limits!”
After a moment, Twilight smiled and shook her head. “Still the same old Discord. Nothing’s ever quite what it seems with you, is it?”
“Where would be the fun in that?” He made a shooing motion with his paw. “Off to bed with you, now. You’ve taken up quite enough of my ‘me time,’ thank you very much.”
“Sure thing,” Twilight said, her smile still wry. She turned and trotted to the door. “Good night, Discord.” She paused on the knob, looking quickly over her shoulder. “And thanks.”
“You’ll receive my invoice within the week!” Discord called, plucking a plum from his tree.
The moon moved a little bit, and the sunrise drew ever closer.
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This is absolutely perfect.
I HATE the Twilight immortality crisis subject. That being said, I thoroughly enjoyed this. What I hate about most fics involving this subject is the fact that there is never a logical conclusion that can be drawn from the story. It's a conflict most authors can't resolve. This story ended with a clear resolution to the conflict. Well done sir (or Madame) have a multitude of moustaches
Discord did a good job explaining his view on immortality.
Great story sweetie belle and spike so cute
3994775
thing is milked for drama and pathos. Here, the question of immortality is used to make Twilight (and the reader) think about mortality, the way we tend to live our lives as if we were immortal anyway, and the inevitability of sorrows and loss in any life, immortal or mortal. Which makes all the difference!
Usually, the "Woe is immortal me!"
I've gone on record saying that I don't particularly care for these types of stories. A lot of the time, said stories are melodramatic, pretentious, and suffer from Grave of the Fireflies Syndrome, whereby we feel bad for the character's situation rather than, well, the character.
This, however, is a philosophical think piece that I can really sink my teeth into. Twilight isn't bemoaning her situation; she's weighing the pros and cons, just like we would expect her to. Discord's advice is actually quite sound here, and it shows that he actually can be a good friend if he puts in some effort instead of treating friendship like an obligation rather than a bond. The matter of Twilight being immortal or not is left completely ambiguous, which I find to be more welcome than a definitive answer. And of course, there are the points that 3995542 made oh-so-eloquently.
This is the "Who Wants To Live Forever?" trope done right, and for that, I salute you.
I love the idea of Discord being capable of being a helpful guide for Twilight, I really, truly do! It makes sense, in a way, and is just so perfect; he's a foil to her neurosis and the two of them could learn a lot from one another!
Extremly well written
This was wonderful
Discord as not a villain is an amazing character, and this story demonstrates it perfectly. Also, his view on immortality is pretty logical (but don't tell him that)
Discord giving sane advice?
What bizarre world is this?! THE END IN NEIGH!!
One note I should mention which practically every author makes mistakes on.
They assume immortality comes with losing old memories. This is almost certain not to be the case. Memory does not function that way. Long-term memories, especially old ones, seem to be almost hard-wired into the brain. They are often the LAST memories to be lost, as is frequently the case with Alzheimer's and other forms of dementia.
New memories are far more tenuous. If we are dealing with an immortal, they may eventually reach the 'out of memory space' point if they still posses organic brains, and become incapable of forming new memories unless they develop a conscious means of overwriting older memories to free up space. Otherwise, the many little channels in synapses which store the memories will always be there.
If they DON'T have organic brains... well then, there's no reason to assume they have limits of any kind on their memories! Indeed, they could operate as virtual Akashic Records, where all that they have ever experienced and thought is forever stored, immutable for all time.
They are immortal, remember. Their bodies are not burdened by the processes of age and decay which afflict us as we age, and that includes the damage/death of neurons which store memories. Assume that they are perpetually in their 'roaring 20's' with regard to health and brain function, everything working at maximum efficiency in perpetuity.
3996693
I'm aware that Discord, having lived for millennia and had plenty of experiences in that time, is probably going to be wise; that doesn't make it any less weird and jarring to actually see that side of him. I would be demanding continuations if I didn't think it would be bad for the original story; it has been a wonderfully thought-provoking read.
3996726 Eh, sorry, Alondro, but even a human lifespan is waaaay longer than humans have the capacity to remember. We're all functionally immortal because not only have we already lived longer than we can remember in any detail, we're going to live long enough that what we're doing right now will be forgotten.
That's why I think worrying that immortality will be awful is stupid, anyway.
3996843 I would request that you read up on some modern neuroscience before you make incorrect statements.
The upper limit of the human memory has NEVER been quantified, because it has never been reached. People with excellent memories suffer senility or die before they reach their maximum storage capacity.
There are people with memory so astounding, they can recall the imperfections on every page of every book they've ever read.
Even assuming that what is suspected to be the root of memory designates the threshhold of human memory, the limit is calculated as follows:
Excerpt from Paul Reber, professor of psychology at Northwestern University
"Although there must be a physical limit to how many memories we can store, it is extremely large. We don’t have to worry about running out of space in our lifetime.
The human brain consists of about one billion neurons. Each neuron forms about 1,000 connections to other neurons, amounting to more than a trillion connections. If each neuron could only help store a single memory, running out of space would be a problem. You might have only a few gigabytes of storage space, similar to the space in an iPod or a USB flash drive. Yet neurons combine so that each one helps with many memories at a time, exponentially increasing the brain’s memory storage capacity to something closer to around 2.5 petabytes (or a million gigabytes). For comparison, if your brain worked like a digital video recorder in a television, 2.5 petabytes would be enough to hold three million hours of TV shows. You would have to leave the TV running continuously for more than 300 years to use up all that storage."
Now, this may not even be the limit. There is evidence that INDIVIDUAL ION CHANNELS can function at quantum levels and each channel can function to store parts of multiple memories! This brings the absolute physical limit up exponentially if it turns out to be true, to the tune of thousands of years worth of memory space.
And again, it still ignores the fact that a true immortal would no longer even function according to natural physiology.
3995542 I couldn't agree more
Wow. This was perfect. A Discord that oscillates between goofy and harsh is perfect as the spirit of Chaos. I can't really say what it was, but the flash to the heartbreaking scenes and his frank tone there was fantastic, reminding me of his shifts from goofy to threatening in the show. Well done. Really well done. And a much better handling of this issue than the trite immortality thing that people always make with Celestia, always going "oh, boohoo, I'm so sad and tired."
Have a like and a fave and a "please write more".
Happy writing.
A delightful response response to the "waaaaa, immortality sucks" crowd. Well done.
3997137 All that stuff you're saying doesn't matter because human memory doesn't work that way. Except for a few people with freakish memory -- they probably still don't have to worry about it based on what you said, but maybe if they were immortal they would.
Everyone else forgets almost everything in a time frame that's so much faster than the theoretical limit that it's stupid. Not to mention that we don't record full-motion video; we compress things and regenerate them on demand when we imagine that we're remembering them.
From what I've read on neuroscience we don't even really *experience* full-motion video, and mostly just imagine that we're seeing and hearing things in the first place, before they even get to short-term memory.
3997417 Ah, so my memory is indeed superhuman. I can recall many movies with staggering detail when I concentrate upon the reflections. I can also recall when subtle details have been changed in later versions of movies. For instance, the sound effect 'shrieks' of the vaporizing ear-parasites in "Star Trek II: Wrath of Khan" were changed in the Star Trek Motion Picture collection. In "Star Trek: The Motion Picture", I noticed that several scenes involving the android 'probe' of Leiutenant Ilia used a different edit, and cut out several small portions of dialog. Also cut out was the scene in which Kirk followed Spock out into the V-ger ship in an attempt to prevent him from entering the closed chamber. This also led to a scene being cut in which Robo-Ilia angrily asks, "Why have two carbon units entered V-ger?" and Decker's response. You see... I am not exactly human anymore.
Besides, the fact that a few people are savants with regard to memory indicates that, in ideal physiological circumstances, the human brain IS CAPABLE of hyper-detailed memory.
Certainly not EVERYONE possesses the trait. But SOME do, which means humanity as a whole has that capacity. It is then very likely, that upon ascending to an immortal state the brains of any being granted that level of being would natually attain flawless physiology in every system.
This was painfully out of character, which is a shame, because otherwise I really liked this.
Honestly, this is pretty good. I always thought that immortality was an blessing and a curse. Now though... hm... you gave me a lot to think about.
3994699
Dunno if I'd go that far, but I definitely appreciate that you think so! Thanks for reading.
3994775
I know that most stories involving this subject fall into the same traps, and I tried to stay consciously aware of that while writing to avoid it. Glad you think I did a good job!
3994854
Discord was difficult for me to write. His intention had to come off clearly in the end, but he had to take a roundabout way of getting there in order to keep him in character. Hopefully I did it right!
3995458
Heh, that's something that just sort of cropped up as I was writing the story—I didn't have it planned originally. Glad you liked it!
3995542
You hit the nail on the head.
3995623
Thanks, Met! I really had to be careful writing this one since I know it's such an easy trope to screw up. Looks like my intent shone through, based on your analysis of the story here.
And I purposefully left the question of whether or not Twilight's immortal unanswered because we don't actually know whether she's immortal or not. We can debate it one way or the other, but the show hasn't offered a conclusive answer yet. I'm definitely glad that you appreciate the ambiguity there.
3995808
It's funny. When I started writing this I had no real idea of how well Twilight and Discord would work together. After having written it, though, I totally agree. He's a great foil! Can't wait to write more about their "friendship" in future stories.
3996067
Thanks for saying so! And thank you for the myriad of moustaches, as well.
3996514
And you're equally wonderful for having read it! Thanks a ton.
3996547
He has so much more potential when he's not a villain, to be sure. And I'm glad you liked his answer to the immortality issue. It's logical, but not intuitive.
3996693
Duck and cover! Hides under an actual duck.
3996726 3996843
I'm glad to see something I wrote sparking such an intelligent debate between you two! I think I'm gonna side with Alondro on this one, even though my story goes against it. The scene which caused this debate adds to the story's theme, and I'm willing to sacrifice some accuracy for that.
3997209
I had a pretty tough time writing Discord, honestly. He's such an enigmatic character that it's hard to judge what he would or wouldn't do. I'm glad you think I did a good job, and I'm even more glad that you liked my take on the immortality issue. Thanks for reading!
3997239
That's what I was gunning for. Thanks for the praise!
3997585
I agree. I changed it up a bit, and I think it works a little better. Thanks for the feedback!
3997613
The most I can hope to do with my writing is to make people think. I'm glad I accomplished that for you. Thanks for reading!
I absolutely loved this piece of yours; the humor and everything blended together so well, and everything just seemed dead on with the characters personality, and Discord...I don't know how you pulled that off, but you matched his wit and canniness perfectly! I noticed it said complete, but will there be more chapters once the show gives a definite conclusion, if it does?
3997724
I think one of the writers stated that "Twilight will not outlive her friends."
...clearly this means that ALL of them will become alicorns at some point.
FimFic Episode V: The doublepost strikes back
3997137
The problem with your logic is that you assume celestia has photographic memory. while her brain wont decay as a human would in old age, if she doesnt think about something for a very long time, then that memory will be lost to her.
yes her cutie mark was an important moment in her young life, but after all she has been through, comparativley its not a big deal. so if she doesnt think about it for a few hundred years, or maybe just 50 or so, she would find herself having trouble recalling it.
Liked for the unique perspective on the Twimortal debate.
Faved for the SweetieSpike.
This is, by far, one of the best fan fictions I have ever read. Very nicely done!
3997943
... or all die in one hellacious Heroic Sacrifice.
3997943
Or she can simply live her normal age as she would live as a unicorn and not outlive her friends. =P
I suppose this is one of the better emotality fics, but fuck that whole thing is played out.
This sounds like it'd be a good fit between season 3 and 4, well, aside for the heavy emotional stuff that is. Still, it's typical Discord to make things more lighthearted than they are.
...they really need to add a Discord emote
3998690
Or they might just not be friends anymore.
3999397 Or perhaps Twilight will die first.
I always love to see what direction writers take with Discord; each has their own little twist on the way he acts and speaks—quite fitting, actually.
3999662
Wow, that got real sad real fast.
wow, discord droppin' the knowledge bomb, this was a huge learning experience for me. fantastic, fantastic fic.
Daw, this was a nice read! I like how it never jumped in time, staying within the same unbroken night.
Also liked the little detail of Twi's old hourglass room reminding her of what was on her mind. It was a nice detail.
3998690 or she will not outlive them within the context of the show. Since the show will end way before they even get a chance to get old let alone die of old age. In other words this is way to vague an answer to be considered definitive.
4000331
Good thing we exist to fix that!
Great read. I could say you put an excellent thought in my brain about immortality. Now that I think about it, and being as extremely apathetic as I am, I don't think immortality would effect me as much as I thought with how you had Discord put it into perspective. I could just reinvent myself after a while like an elf to stave off the boredom.
Sweetie and Spike were really cute by the way.
4000331
Well yes, the show is very likely to end with them all still alive, but that's not really an answer within the context of their LIVES.
Hmm. Good to see that someone writed Discord being actually wise. Granted, he's still same chaotic wacky old joker, but you cant deny his wisdom when he decides to share it. Pretty simple, nice story that I can see being in official MLP when it gets a little more 'for teens'.
Good job!
This is one of the few stories about Twilight's immortality (and resulting emo-tality) that manages to be good. Most stories seem to take the sour-grapes angle that Twilight starts out with here, and Discord nicely deflates that one; his fake flashes of immortal-toggling worked quite nicely. And he certainly took it seriously as Twilight requested; "Let’s get a tad heavier" indeed.
It's clear why Discord didn't want to spend any more time coaching Twilight through this: he made far too much sense, and what fun is there in making sense?
4000751 That's just it though the tweet is too vague to tell for sure what she meant and can be interpreted many ways thus not giving us a real answer. Leaving it up to the fans to decide i guess.
I just wanted to say that you have done one of the best jobs with characterizing Discord I have ever seen. When it comes to Discord characters, I feel like there are two main balancing acts to preform in a story like this:
1) Wisdom vs Whimsy
2) Friend vs Foe
(yay alliteration!)
You, sir, have them both down in spades! He shows the wisdom that any being his age would have and all the while maintains his carefree attitude that we have come to love. He shows that he does care about Twilight and the others, but is still himself and old habits die hard.
On a different note, I find it odd that I used the phrase "old habits die hard" with a divinity of chaos. Shouldn't old habits be easy to replace if his whole shtick is that he changes everything at random?
That was fantastic. I love the take on immortality, I havent seen that before