- Member Since 4th May, 2013
- offline last seen March 26th
NeverClever
ACAB | Kinky aroace ♠️ | All pronouns accepted
NeverClever
Joined 4th May, 2013 ·
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I learned a new word and all I did was read the description. Thanks, man.
3362990
I wish I learned a new word.
NeverClever, why do you always make me feel so dirty
I shouldn't be turned on by this
First Necro and now Somno. You have a rare gift.
I shouldn't like this, and I should turn around and walk away because this is creepy. However, I'm a psychopath, so
I LOVE IT!!!!
3362990 I try
3363318 Hey, if you can't write well, write weird. That's a saying, right?
3363363 If you're a psychopath, then what does that make me since I wrote it?
3363566 A god?
Darn you and your fetish stories that are slightly different than what I like.
When's the next chapter of Undiluted coming out?
3365070 I was actually thinking "someone with too much free time"
3365513 My goal when writing is to make people as uncomfortable as possible while still arousing them. It doesn't always work since the internet is full of jaded pervs (like me
).
Eventually.
3371749 That works too
I thought that it was pretty well written, but I feel that this needs a sequel. This has a lot of potential to turn any way you want it to. Either a steamy romance, a dark rape/revenge, or even one of those things where Big Mac has a secret sex life/fetish and surprises Cheerly with it. Way to go dude!
In my opinion it could use some work but the sex was great, what needs some work is the duration of the sex.
3395586 Thanks
Originally it did have a bit more of a hint-heavy ending, but it ended up feeling rather trite and contrived. ("You knew?" "Eeyup"
) I guess you could make Cheerilee a repeat offender, but that would require even more OOC behavior than is already here (although watching her date rape Big Mac would be pretty funny if it was melodramatic enough).
3395813 I usually take ~2-3k words for a decent fap. I did consider making it a bit longer (why the second climax is so fast), but I thought it was a good length (that's what she said
).
3399886 my point thought is, I was expecting an extreme Clopfest and the longer it is the closer to a clopfest you get and I mean a total clopfest. No offense. The length was great though, it was surprising that the second orgasm came so quickly.
Nice little story, I guess it was anthro give the mention of hands and some vague descriptions, still it was enjoyable.
I will say though, this begs for a continuation
Edit: Didn't notice the anthro tag
3399886
Well... You could always just have BM (Big Mac) do something completely unexpected. Like, he's the strong silent type, but by night, he's a sex craze machine! (DOM/SUB type of thing...)
I have NeverClever followed, but this didn't show up in my feed and I didn't see any blog post or anything. I demand retribution!
NeverClever always seems to have just that special, awesome brand of fetishes that are right up my weird alley. It's not dark or gross, it's just really uncommon and unique. In a good way.
Oh, and who has to skip to the sex in a 3000 word fic...?
3409632 Thanks
Nice to know being unorthodox helps make up for my lack of skill.
And I've skipped to the sex in short pieces, mostly when reading lots of fics at once and misjudging the pacing
3409547 "Secretly a sex maniac" is actually a fandom cliche. And not just in this fandom
3407301 As I mentioned here--3399886--I did consider a second chapter/tiny epilogue, but all the different possibilities felt really cliche. Not out of the question, of course, but for now I think it works well as open to interpretation.
3400544 If you want an extreme, total clopfest I wrote one over here
3409839 I'm writing a story called answers you can look into it once i have it finished but ill gladly read it.
i.imgur.com/gFQ6xU6.png
3409839
I know... I'd just like to see BM do something out of his character...
Welp, it's been way too long, but finally got around to this.. I forgot if I was going to read the "her body was cold" too... but ah well. Can start here and see how it turned out. Heh, see you did a pun on the "quills and sofas" :P
Noticed a minor spelling error: "Her ear flicked again. He glanced down and saw a pony at the bottom of the hill." think you meant "she" :P.
And okay, had to check the info about this just to make sure they were antrho xD Got a little "wait, what?". Quite neat to see a mention of non-"perfect" bodies too. And impressed that you didn't take the usual path of over-proportioning Mac's genitals. Gotta say, looking rather good so far. Will see how this plays out, but potentially can say that a counterpart, or reversed "victim" at least of this could be very interesting. As said, gotta see where this goes first x3 But like the setting so far.
See you skipped any type of oral... well, for "warm up" at least heh. She got hard+slick quite quickly ;3 And huh, quite impressed you made her well hung (large vaginal depth+girth) Can't think of much other fics where any female can take Mac fully. Dialogue might do with a little polish, but it's not cheesy, so points there. Can say a few parts, like the needle comparison, or "squeezing another one out of his body" was a little hard to follow. And wasn't entirely sure if she came, but it seemed to indicate so. Though, just a side note: VERY few women can orgasm without clitoral stimulation. Unless you go with her having a equine vulva, but even then it could be good to mention like, her prostate or so. (g-spot) It felt a bit hazily described.
Can say it's neat you mentioned her muscles, yet neither genital was described much a tall. They were up to the viewer to imagine more or less. Second orgasm was a tad bit quick, but then again, I know some that pop easily a second go. And see you went with solely full contraction ones. It works as said. (and especially in terms of "being unnoticeable unlike if she/he had ejaculated) Could've played around with a bit more perverse topics otherwise x3 And actually like the remorse at the end. Makes this even more unique than the regular one. (though, having an opposite norm theme, it does clash a little as it has one of the few females that's done it, be one of the few that feels bad about it :P Still, was a refreshing take to see. And assuming the script would've been the same for the original version, can say I'd found both versions interesting.) So yeah, all and all, great job on this.
On two unrelated side notes; Been working on "translating" a fic to the opposite gender roles, harder work than I thought xD And secondly: Female deepthroating, both human and equine, is a LOT harder than male deepthroating to work with xD
3662671 Thanks for the (very thorough) comment. (and sorry my response was so delayed
)
I fixed the typo, I'll be sure to keep the other stuff in mind for my next fic.
3780161 Well, like I said: I do make very thorough comments xD Not always too understandable though. (and it's coo, was within a month at least heh)
And okies. Feel free to ask for tips or advice as said, or just questions overall :P Quiet fond of giving feedback and balling ideas.
First draft was the right idea. Sigh.
4484759 I actually didn't get very far into the first draft before giving up on it--Big Mac's main character trait is his stoicness and limited speech. Giving him a lengthy internal monologue really didn't fit with his character. I know other writers have pulled off just that, but it was really hard for me to write, so I thought swapping the roles would be a little more natural.
4486089 I think it was right doing it this way big mac is too shy to do something like this
Good story, quick and hot to read! Thumbs up!
So I disliked it, then liked it so you could get perspective and self-esteem...did....did I do it right?
She'll be craving for his package.
Nice fun fact :>
It always sucks when only one gets to finish. Most Excellent.
4486089
I've been wondering, how is this fic subliminal?