• Member Since 19th Mar, 2012
  • offline last seen 5 minutes ago

Aragon


Quoth the raven: "CAW CAW CAW CAW CAW CAW CAW CAW CAW" (Patreon)

More Blog Posts210

Feb
18th
2019

They Stab It with their Steely Knives,but They Just Can't Kill the Beast · 12:16am February 18th

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Shout-out:

  • I met Undome Tinwe in a small Hungarian forest back in 1945. The winter had been rough that year, and food was scarce—so, late one night, I ventured out to find wild berries. Undome Tinwe mistook me for a deer and shot me in the leg. Noticing I was human-shaped, he stopped in a panic, and asked who I was. I told him, and Undome Tinwe immediately shot me five more times in the head and then beat me with the butt of his rifle until it broke.
  • Jeffb and I fought together against a beast from behind the stars. After stabbing its black rotten heart, I asked hey are you gonna f**k that? Jeffb said excuse me, what? I said I mean, I’ve been pretty lonely since I lost my wife. He asked are you talking about the putrid corpse of the Old God? Are you going to f**k the putrid corpse of an Old God because you lost your wife. I said look I didn’t come here to be judged, I just think it’d be a waste not to. He said you're my blood brother and the first thing you tell me after we save the world is that you want to shove the putrid corpse of an Old God up your OH GOD YOU’RE DOING IT AT LEAST WAIT TILL I’M DONE JESUS.
  • Emlyn Costilov received an invitation to my private island in 2012, and accepted without hesitation, saying they’d been aching for a real challenge for a while. I welcomed them with a morbid spectacle: a human-sized chess board, where the pieces were the chained members of Emlyn’s family. I said, every time a piece dies, the human dies! So far, nobody has managed to beat me. Will you? And Emlyn smiled, and said, I can’t. But he can. Then they stepped to the side, and out the cage came Undome Tinwe and he said I BOUGHT A NEW GUN, and I replied OH GOD NO NOT YOU AGAIN and he beat the living shit out of me with the butt of his rifle.

They're all my $5 tier Patrons (or higher), and I love them dearly. This is how I do shout-outs.

I am not a clever man.

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Comments ( 52 )

For context regarding the blog: some people were RPing in the writing-help room in Fimfiction's Discord server. I PMd a moderator and asked if I could fuck around a bit to annoy them out. The mod gave me a thumb's up.

'But god, at what cost' has been a running joke in my usual server ever since this shit went down.

Oh yeah, and that Patreon shoutout at the end also appears at the end of my latest story. I posted it here again cause, let's be honest. That latest story is 90k. Statistically, you hadn't seen it. And I like it! It's a good shoutout.

You have a server?

my lungs hurt

But, god, at what cost.

Wanderer D
Moderator

You did good. Now... write them.
You wished to write and share this.
Your story is a tragedy. Now your gift, is also your curse.
Because you got what you wanted, and now you know the cost.

Majin Syeekoh
Story Approver

But at what cost

God is dead

I want to save this. How should I go about in doing so?

Okay, I'm totally and completely lost here.:applejackconfused:

this is fucking gold

Goddammit Syee- I mean, Goddammit Aragon.

This is apparently what I miss by not being on discord much anymore.

Hmm, how about Cystplaced?

A dude goes to a con dressed as a wad of meat.
The dude gets transported to Equestria as a sapient tumour on somepony's dong.
He gets what he wants, for he is frequently inside a mare.
But at what cost? For he is literally cancer.

Side note: have you ever tried being a DM? 'Cause you sound like you would be the greatest DM ever.

i read the whole thing


the story is a tragedy

Jesus Christ, Ara, why must I shed tears of laughter every single friggin' time I read one of your blogs.

5015528
You could bookmark it, but

god

at what cost.

Wanderer D
Moderator

I'm just going to say now I'm disappointed by the lack of comments going "Hey! Hotel California!"

I subscribed to Aragon for the Aragon content. I got exactly what I wanted, but at what cost?

AT

WHAT

COST

Aragon goes to fimfic dressed as comedy gold

5015560

Hey, it's ho--

...oh, I see.

:derpytongue2:

Anyway, I was literally rolling on the floor in the middle of my living room by about the 3/4 mark. My family was greatly disturbed. And worst of all, there was no real way for me to explain what was so funny.

So like, good job, I think?

camo.fimfiction.net/ucApPzre_rp2lc7hED1PCD6DPkxcaUQ2utKdqDx6rsM?url=https%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FyUPa4Wd.png

My thoughts exactly. I was laughing so hard I was crying by the end of this. Excellent!

Must be the best 20 minutes.

5015542
You rally should have used GM because I feel like Aragon is the sort who’d purposefully use the other meaning of the title.
And also yes. A million times yes would I watch Aragon be in charge of a TTRP. The pure torture the players would go through would make it worth it.

PresentPerfect
Author Interviewer

Aragon, this is from August

Stop. Please get some help.

5015626
I'm not sure if I'm grateful that he spared us for half a year or resentful that he inflicted it upon us anyway.

I'm going to go with both. At some unspecified cost.

Listplaced: guy goes to a con dressed as one of Twilight’s to-do lists
Buys a fancy pen to check himself off
Winds up in Equestria, as a sentient but silent to-do list
But
In the claws of the creature he hates most
Spike, the spoiler.
Until Twilight finally takes the list from him to add a few more items at the end
But every stroke of the pen feels like a knife in his skin.
It’s a tragedy.
Because now that he finds himself in the magical glow of his favorite pony, she’s literally torturing him.
Then, when he’s finally checked off...
Shredded.
He got what he wanted, but
God
At what cost?

5015534
Honestly? It deserves both, Majin contributed.

GODDAMMIT SYEEKOH, GODDAMMIT ARAGON!!! :rainbowlaugh:

5015635
Numbers, you're a hero for doing this!

TDR

* reads all of that with his own two eyes*
*blinks*
*blinks again*
*head desk*

These are from August. Why am I seeing them just now?

I feel cheated.

Dude, just use Gyazo. It'll save you those 17 hours next time.

Does your shitposting know no bounds?

Weird flex, but okay.

I don't know what Displaced is.

Thank Celestia. :trollestia:

We need to get some extract of Aragon, a little GAPJaxie seasoning, and bake it in a Cold In Gardez.
But at what cost.

5015656
A tragedy.

5015626

5015656

5015685

I got lazy. This one was hard to edit.

I mean look at how many pictures are in here! It was at least an hour's worth of work. An entire hour. I can do so much stupid shit in that hour, dude. Writing a blog from scratch is legitimately easier than doing this.

5015785
GOD. AT WHAT COST?

I’m in class I can’tbe laughing at this so I kinda just

Fell out of my chair

5015785
Yeah, you can make another fic.

/dab

5015542
The sequel can be ………………………

wait for it …

Brisplaced.

Futa medusa guy is the mohel.

This, THIS is your medium.

but

:ajbemused:

Jesus Aragon, my sides... oh my sides... they've ascended to another plane
but at what cost

RBDash47
Site Blogger

5015896
Thanks, I hate it

5015785
Tell us the truth; you tried to put this post together in Microsoft Word, and every time you moved an image everything went to Hell.
In November you decided to just set everything as center-justified.

Microsoft Word proceeded to place every image in the same place on the same page.

Подери тебя Дискорд, Арагон. Вот подери тебя блять Дискорд. What the hell do you doing to come up with this stuff? Every time I think I've seen everything, you show up and create something I couldn't even dream of in a delusional dream. Why you deflovered my mind, and why i want more?

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