Hello!So people have bugged me about a FimFiction account for a while now and I've finally decided to get one. Anyways, I suck at these bio things so... yeah.
Twilight Sparkle is dying. The pony body was never meant to handle her level of magic and now even the smallest spell causes her body to degrade. The only cure is to stop all magic use and hope that her body slowly heals itself, but things are rarely that simple. Celestia has fallen ill and her only hope lies in Yggdrasil, hidden deep in the Crystal Desert.
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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Okay, so it is finally here. Sorry for getting this out so late, but a combination of exams, assignments and my collab with y1fellas really sucked time out of this fic. Now to my ramblings.
The journal section at the start and finish were interesting to write. On one hand I wanted to keep who it is secret for now, but at the same time to imply who it was, and truth be told, deliberate foreshadowing has never been my strong point. It was also lots of fun trying to slot in genetics into this while altering it enough so that it'd make sense in the setting. For those of you complaining about them even having genetic knowledge, please hold out on that until later one when everything is explained.
So, Twilight's first section was a big question for me. I could either write from her perspective and reveal her condition straight from the beginning or save it for later and have it as an "Oh crap" momment for all you lovely readers when it was revealed. Each had their merits, but I decided to go with this option because I really wanted this to be a tragedy and for there to be that constant question hanging over your heads as to whether Twilight will survive or not.
Twilight's second section was actually rather fun to write. I really, really, really wanted to push the emotional aspect of Celestia's illness onto everypony with them all acting (slightly) out of character. Of course, this was most obvious with Twilight and her thoughts, but (hopefully) it came through for Spitfire as well.
Aaaaaaand leaving off with Dash-Spitfire bonding. Not much to say on that actually.
Oh yeah, DoomManta's my editor so read his Editor's Note below mine.
I
V
It's strange how often I end up directly applying my university major to My Little Pony fanfictions. Really, it is. If you took all of the back and forth discussion Orphius and I had during the course of this chapter and the next one and then copied it into a Microsoft Word document, it would probably be about a two page discussion of molecular biology and genetics. And the weirdest part is that this story isn't even the first time I've had lengthy discussions about advanced science topics, biology, chemistry, and physics.
As for the actual story, I could go on rambling about specific parts, but Orphius covered everything I would have said nicely. So instead I'll just end with this question: Is it wrong that I love watching Twilight do horrible things to herself in the name of Celestia?
1507003
Yes, yes it is wrong. You should be ashamed of yourself.
1507814
hypocrite
Horrible things they may be, but so far they've made for a compelling tale.
1508126
I never said I'm not ashamed of my self for writting scenes involving... well... a lot of dark things actually. I swear I don't hate Twilight!
1508129
Thanks! I try to use the horrible stuff to enchance a fic rather than doing it for the sake of being evil.
1508146
could have sworn i've had this conversation with you regarding twilight when you posted your last story...
1508154
Probably. I tend to have that discussion with a lot of my readers
1508191
you know, for someone who claims to not hate twilight, I don't see anypony else getting the short end of the stick
1508229 tru fax
1508229 1508272
I don't hate Twilight! Honest. She's one of my favourite ponies.
1508282 the day you prove me wrong is the day I make it onto EqD.
aka never.
1508282
mine too. Maybe after this one, you should try killing dash, like everyone else seems to like to. I swear, dash seems to be the character who dies the most, though these days twilight is running a close second.
1508289
Why was my first response to make worse stuff happen to all the other ponies? Rather than, you know, make sure bad stuff doesn't happen in general.
1508294
Hm... Maybe I should kill Fluttershy then...
1508229 She gets the most abuse because she's the most plausible character to have it happen, probably with Rainbow Dash as a moderately close second. (At least I think so)
As for nopony else getting the short stick:
Breaking Twilight - Applejack and Pinkie Pie both have their souls ripped apart and put back together, Fluttershy loses a wing, Rarity is tortured, Rainbow Dash... well she blows herself up and spends most of the really important parts unconscious. Then there's the psychological trauma that AJ suffers from her confrontation with Twilight, Trixie's from having an entire town under her command slaughtered, Fluttershy's from the measures she takes during the rebellion (especially how she treats wounded), and Celestia's from blaming herself for Twilight's fall and demise.
Obviously Twilight still gets the worst deal by far, but the others share in her misery a bit.
1508301
Wait, RD blowing herself up? Why don't I remember this scene? Why can't I even remember what happened to Dash? I know she gets a blood tranfusion at a later date, but I can't recall why she needed one to begin with. And yeah, that basically sums up everything that happens in that fic.
And finally, someone else who agrees that Twi is the most plausible! Thank you.
Edit: y1fellas reminded me what scene it was. Nevermind
1508297
Don't you dare, you'll be condemned to the deepest circle of pony hell, reserved for trolls and the writers of cupcakes and the rainbow factory.
1508366
But that's the point! Everyone loves Fluttershy so killing/maiming her would get the perfect reaction out of everyone. The more explosive the reaction the better
You know what, don't know why I'm arguing, because for whatever depraved reason, I do so enjoy watching them deal with some tragedy
Enslaved - Yggdrasil
Of course there is viking metal about Yggdrasil.
Speaking of, just the mention of Yggdrasil gives me flashbacks to House Of Leaves.
1508422
Agreed! I just love getting strong reactions and dark/sad gets such a stronger reaction in this fandom than romance. That, and I also suck at writing romance.
1508301
Smells like hate
1508460 I'm confused. Are you saying that I hate Twilight, or that Orphius does?
1508473
I'm sayin' that orphans hates twilight
1508482
*orphius
Twilight's body not being able to handle her own magic? Interesting concept.
1508484 1508473
Seriously, I don't hate Twilight. Why do people keep saying I hate Twilight? Sure, I made her drink urine and tortured her and broke her and killed her and then gave her a fate worse than death, but come on! I don't hate Twilight. Honest.
1508501
You know, every time you lie jeff is one step closer to getting you
i3.ytimg.com/sh/JOOdP2aaviQ/showposter.jpg?v=504a2fe5
1508525
But I'm telling the truuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuth
1508534
Fine go to sleep and will talk tomorrow
1508501 Wait... YOU'RE the one that wrote piss story with Pinkie Pie in it?
*shudders*
And as for who gets the short end of the stick, I say Celestia got it pretty good... wrapped in sandpaper, coated in Tobasco sauce, and deposited as a supository. That would suck only having a week to live.
I do have to agree that Dash seems to be the Kenny of the MLP fandom lol
1508986
Wait, what? Wrong person I think. Maybe. I think?
1508992 Wait... that means there is MORE piss stories out there???
At least I have yet to find a 2 Mares 1 Cup story...
1509012
Hm? It was part of a torture scene where NMM is mentally breaking Twilight by degrading her so... er... that makes it better?
You do realize that now that you've said that someone will write it
1509028 Considerin I just read about Scootaloo eating an "apple pie" that had expired back when Nightmare Moon first got banished, I think I have been traumatized enough for one night!
static.desktopnexus.com/thumbnails/1161367-bigthumbnail.jpg
1509065
But where's the fun in that!
Given that I just pre read the newest chapter, I hope you're not expecting one of my normal long ass reviews. But yeah, you're evil and you hate Twilight. Reading this again, I have no idea how you can possibly say I'm worse than you.
Self destructive Twilight is so wonderfully painfully hard to read.
1509161
You castrated someone! You killed Braeburn! You killed Luna, and Celestia (before the fic even began) as well as countless other ponies!
1509165
The guy I castrated was a douche, Braeburn was possessed and trying to kill Rarity, and they all died painlessly... Except Luna, that was kind of a nasty way to go.
But you've done way worse than any of that in your last fic. Breaking Twilight was messed up, and that civil war fic you''ve got planned is so evil it scares me.
1509168
It's not that bad! Don't listen to him, he lies. The civil war fic is all sunshine lollipops. Honest.
Now hush, no more talking about that fic.
uhumm. sad. tragedy, well at least is not dark ... yet
reading later
1509172
In what way is that fic sunshine and lollipops? I'm worried about it! I'm legitiatley worried about just how messed up it will be. And this from the guy who loves 2 of the most infamous dark fics around!
Sunshine and lollipops?
1509176
Sunshine and lollipops
1509161>>1509165 Must... Not... Make... Married couple joke...
1508297 kill Fluttershy, or make nothing bad happen. Either way, Flutterbitch deserves it. >:(
1509555 You're evil
1509508 I just want to see y1fellas reponse to that
1511028 says the one who puts Twilight through hell in every fic. ('¤_¤)
1511163 Not in Transcending Legends! Plus, you're talking about Fluttershy here. How could you do something so evil to her?
1511173 wha-th-bu-YOU CUT OFF HER LIMBS IN BREAKING TWILIGHT! So quiet. o_e
1511190
Her limb. One. Not plural. And she's still alive