The Industrial Revolution and its Consequences
Celestia enjoyed the content silence of a spring morning, sipping from a cup of freshly brewed tea. The day’s activities in Canterlot had yet to begin in earnest, allowing the solar monarch a rare moment of respite.
So relaxed was she that she barely flinched when the doors to the drawing room swung open very abruptly to reveal her bedraggled sister coming off her night shift. Celestia smiled towards her, whose gaze seemed far off and distant.
“Good morning, Luna, or should I say good evening?” Celestia finished with a guffaw. The often-repeated joke was sure to earn Luna’s ire, but this time, any timely retort was lacking, much to Celestia’s surprise. “Is something the matter, sister?” Luna finally looked at Celestia with a sheepish grin.
“Apologies, sister, I have found myself somewhat absentminded as of late,” Luna said. “A matter has troubled my mind the past few nights. It relates specifically to things I have noticed since…my return.” Celestia shot a sympathetic look in Luna’s direction. Another modern invention had flummoxed her sister again, no doubt. It had been some time since the last time her sister had approached her about this, but Celestia did not mind.
“It is of no issue, Luna. Share your problems with me. Take a seat,” said Celestia. She patted the table and pulled out a chair. “I’m sure together we can clear up whatever it is.”
“Thank you, Celestia,” Luna said. “I must admit that I was most eager for your help to clear this mystery.” Celestia nodded and spread out her forehooves in a welcoming fashion.
“Go ahead, Luna.”
“Sister, I am most confused about the state of modern technology.” Celestia blinked once or twice, silence overtaking the room. A bit of a broad topic, no doubt, especially compared to previous enquiries, but Celestia had time to indulge her sister, she supposed.
“Oh, that is okay, Luna,” she said reassuringly. “You have been absent for a long time, and change is inevitable. Modern technology is complicated, sometimes even for me to understand. You have nothing to feel ashamed of.”
Luna shook her head vigorously. “You misunderstood. I accept that change is inevitable. However, I don’t understand how it has developed.” Celestia was admittedly a bit flummoxed but did her best to keep composed.
“I don’t entirely follow,” Celestia answered.
“It doesn’t make any sense,” Luna declared. “It’s all a jumbled mess per my research.”
“Research?” Celestia repeated. “What research have you been conducting?”
“Follow me.” Luna then left her chair and made towards the door. Celestia was a mixture of apprehension but, at the same time, intense personal curiosity. What had Luna been precisely up to? She left the drawing room and followed as her sister took her down a series of corridors to one of the quieter wings of the castle. Luna stopped at an innocuous-looking door before pushing into a poorly lit room.
Luna used her magic flick on a switch unveiling a room covered from wall to wall with papers. With sticky bands attached between specific reports with different colouring, The room was a mess of documents, files and pictures all stacked in what Celestia could only describe as organised chaos.
“Behold! The fruit of my investigations!” Luna proudly exclaimed, giggling madly.
“You’ve been…busy,” Celestia said, concerned, her eyes going from wall to wall in disbelief. She supposed that a thousand years on the moon would have some mental side effects on a pony. Celestia jumped slightly as one of the many towers of papers precariously wobbled.
“Nighttimes are long and lonely,” Luna said, shuffling a stack of papers from an office chair and sitting down.
“Twilight would be proud,” Celestia teased. Luna snorted before floating over a pile of papers that depicted several photos.
“You see, sister, there are discrepancies everywhere. Even here in Canterlot, right beneath our noses. There is the presence of electronic dance floors, computerised video games, electric sewing machines, and laundering machines. All these devices are integral parts of the modern ponies' lives.”
“I believe the term is laundry machine,” Celestia corrected. Luna seemed not to pay any mind to her sister but instead powered on regardless as if gripped by some excitable fever.
“I have been especially fascinated by reports from the mirror world that Twilight has been privy to. In many ways a world so much like our own but so very distinct at the same time. A world without magic but with innovations that positively dwarf our own.” Luna deposited a massive folder in front of Celestia named ‘Equestris Puellae,’ which Celestia had no idea what to make of. “This made me look closer at our world. I could not help but wonder. There are so many inconsistencies, but that’s not what shocked me.” Luna shook her head back and forth in an exaggerated manner. Celestia wondered if Luna had been planning this day in detail for some time.
“No, dear sister, what shocked me is how alike we are. And thus, we come to the crux of the issue. Equestria itself! One does not need to look far to see that Equestria resembles a quilted patchwork of townships and cities existing in varying advanced states. For example, Manehatten is a glamorous skyline of skyscrapers and architectural wonder. Yet rural towns are little different than the townships I had seen before my banishment.” Luna threw files into the air, causing them to fall around Celestia like a bureaucrat’s idea of Heartwarming. “It’s maddening!”
“Luna, now hang on,” Celestia started. Her sister seemed to barely hear Celestia’s protests as her eyes veered widely between different wall panels, excitedly pointing at one thing and another. Finally, Luna tapped a specific page on the wall with an exaggerated question mark on the front. Luna turned to Celestia with a wild look in her eyes.
“Think Celestia, party cannons, think!”
“P-party cannons?”
“Yes, party cannons,” Luna answered with a swift nod. “Gunpowder. Used primarily domestically for such flights of fancy as mere fireworks. Yet such devices are not to be found in the military.” Luna produced a pamphlet for one of the Guard recruitment campaigns. “To my horror, our elite Royal Guard are still wielding spears and dressed in plate armour as if nothing has changed.”
“I assure you that has not impacted their efficiency,” Celestia stated. Luna fixed her sister with a quizzical stare. Celestia coughed as the silence dragged on.
Luna snorted. “I’d agree with you, but we’d both be wrong.”
“Now, Luna, they do try their best,” Celestia chided, though she did not sound entirely confident.
“A comforting thought that they are in charge of the ever-so-trivial matter of our security, then?” Luna intoned. Celestia rolled her eyes. This was getting nowhere.
“You have made your point. Can we get to whatever crazy conclusion you have concocted?”
“It is my view that the uneven technological development of Equestria is not a mere coincidence but rather the fault of deliberate action.” Luna rubbed her chin. “A great plot, if you would.” Celestia bit her lip to suppress a laugh. It would not be appropriate to interrupt her sister now. Luna was reaching the climax of her mad ramblings, and besides, Celestia was feeling hungry. The less time spent on this, the better. “And I have an inkling of who is responsible.”
“Luna, you’re talking crazy,” Celestia said, picking up an empty cardboard cup. The smell was of the forbidden bean, the demon drink that made Celestia’s skin crawl. “I told you to stop the double espresso drinks. They fry your brain.” Celestia then lifted a wastebasket filled to the brim with identical cups.
“Nonsense,” Luna retorted. “Coffee allows me to operate at peak efficiency. It is Tuesday morning, and I feel as lively as ever!”
“It’s Friday, Luna,” Celestia deadpanned.
“I know it is you, Celestia!” boomed Luna, her hoof outstretched and her best judgemental expression sported. “Who is behind this technological catastrophe!” Celestia recoiled at her sister’s accusation, her mouth agape in indignation.
“Luna, I, for one, am shocked and appalled. For you to think so low of me, I would manipulate society to fit my vaguely defined goals!” Celestia held a hoof against her chest, hoping her sister would accept her denials, but Luna was unmoving.
After a short time, Celestia’s head dropped, and a sheepish smile soon crept onto her features. “Well…I-I may have the teeniest tiniest bit of responsibility.”
“I knew it!” Luna declared triumphantly, practically hopping in place.
“Look, there are good explanations for all of this,” Celestia sighed. “But that, my dear, is a story for another time, and we have a busy day to deal with. I mean, look at the time!” Celestia flicked her hoof at Luna before practically sprinting towards the door, only for her to be unceremoniously blocked by her more diminutive sister.
“You’re not sending me off that easily. You are not even wearing a watch.”
“Fine,” Celestia groaned. She gestured for Luna to take a seat. Celestia sighed several more times before looking at Luna. “Where to begin, hmmm? Well, I suppose the easiest place to start would be the banishment.” Luna winced but made no move to discontinue the explanation.
“Things were very…difficult afterwards. And I am not talking about emotions either. The government was a mess, and I could barely focus on the present. Shortly after our confrontation, traders from the far east brought many wonderous inventions and art to Equestria. Scientists in our time quickly integrated such inventions into our existing society using our advanced magical prowess, which had somewhat of a domino effect over the next two centuries. Equestria moved quickly into what I can call a technological revolution.”
Luna tried to interject, but Celestia cut her off. “It’s best I explain everything simultaneously; otherwise, we will be here until next week. It started with the small stuff, artistic liberalism, and then the growth of books and literacy. Finally, it moved into industrialisation, which you mentioned changed our world. Coal being a significant discovery. The power of steam and its interactions with mechanical rotary engines. Magic was the stopgap when such things did not work as intended, so things progressed faster than we had initially envisaged.
“It was all happening with my blessing. The growing independence of our citizens was partially a result of my mourning. These advances made things far easier for Equestria and me, removing much of the burdens of governance and drastically improving the livelihood of the average citizen.” Celestia clicked her tongue and hummed. “But I fear that my desire to find what you may say were easy fixes in your absence led to far more significant problems, let’s say.” Luna turned her head to the side and asked.
“What exactly would that be?” Celestia hissed between her teeth as if the memory of what had occurred was exceptionally irritating to recall if her very visible cringe was anything to go by.
“Well, you may describe them as thinking machines and running on electricity and magic generators but moving, looking and acting in manners like ponies.” Luna sat dumbfounded, trying to imagine what her sister was talking about. “Though they were made more of iron than our modern-day steel at the time.”
“Thinking machines?”
“Yes.” Celestia grimaced again. “A precursor to what Twilight may have described to you from the human world as computerised artificial intelligence.” Celestia ruffled her wings in agitation. “Safe to say, these wonderous devices that required no food, water, or sleep certainly did not turn out how I thought they would.” Celestia sighed again and dismissively waved her front hoof. “An awful idea in hindsight. Damnable things were so bright that they got all these strange ideas of freedom and fundamental rights.” Luna’s eyes widened at the implication though Celestia powered on.
“I will compress the aftermath to ensure my breakfast doesn’t get cold. There was a struggle, and some bad stuff happened, followed by a technological jihad which resulted in a royal decree forever banning them from our lands.” Luna, once again, tried to interject, only for Celestia to clap her hooves together in finality. “Long story short, Equestria has vowed never to let such technology influence their current course, leading to the colourful conclusions you presented to me this early morning.”
Luna took time to consider her sister’s words, Celestia keenly watching her. Luna shook her head.
“Why are there no records of this?”
Celestia let forth an uproarious laugh. “Because I control the records, duh.” Luna’s face contorted into an expression that was a mixture of shock and disgust. “I hid the Mare on the Moon for a thousand years; I can hide a little old industrial revolution and robotic rebellion. A thousand years of political experience makes one an expert in the art of the cover-up.”
“Don’t you think that is potentially unethical, distorting history for your purposes?”
Celestia stared at Luna, then blinked before throwing her head back in laughter. Finally, she stopped to look at Luna, whose face conveyed complete seriousness. Celestia then laughed again. “Well, at least you didn’t lose your sense of humour on the moon.”
“This isn’t funny, Celestia. What happens when Twilight finds out?”
Celestia snorted. “Trust me, a little historical revisionism will be the least of her worries when she’s in charge.” Celestia shuddered at the thought of the papers awaiting the newly crowned monarch, not to mention the exception of unwanted suitor requests that came in by the boatload.
So. Much. Bad. Poetry.
“My actions have ensured that Equestria basks in the glory of equilibrium,” Celestia beamed happily. “A steady ship for Twilight to inherit as a part of the grand plan.”
“This sounds more like stagnation,” Luna retorted.
Celestia huffed in annoyance. “You used to be more fun.”
“But let’s say hypothetically that all goes well, and Twilight ascends to the throne without complication per your often-quoted master plan. What if she fails to learn from what you did and makes the same mistakes again? What then will happen?”
“She won’t, Luna,” Celestia reassured. “Twilight is a capable mare who can meet whatever challenges sent her way.” Celestia’s tone was laden with evident pride in her student and the requisite confidence that came with knowing the mare since a young age. “Besides, we’ll be off to the side, being able to help if needs be. So, we have no reason to worry that she would fail to adapt. You have seen how she managed the mirror world. Do not be surprised if she is already considering importing their technology here into Equestria.”
“But how can you be so sure, sister?”
“Trust me on this, Luna. Have I ever led us astray?” Luna raised a singular eyebrow in bemusement. “Don’t answer that.” Celestia hastily added. “We have little to fear. It would take something mad like Twilight suddenly disappearing, all the magic dissipating, the whole kingdom falling apart, and the three tribes splitting up.” Celestia allowed herself another round of mirthful chuckles. “Like that’s going to happen!”
Luna giggled. “Tis a silly suggestion indeed!”
“Now, enough of this.” Celestia stood up, stretching her wings out a bit. Her stomach growled, indicating her departure from this sideshow was long overdue. “It’s time for breakfast.” Luna looked around at the mess that was in the room.
“I have been…neglecting my sleep for my projects.” Luna sighed deeply. “What a mess.” Celestia shrugged.
“Nonsense. I am proud that you are pursuing your passions, Luna.” She swept up her sister with her wing into an all-encompassing hug, which Luna gratefully returned. “Now come, another glorious day awaits us.”
“I am famished, sister,” Luna agreed. “Perhaps you can order us the rounded pastry.”
“They are called doughnuts, sister,” Celestia laughed. “Go ahead now, Luna. I’ll be but a moment. Celestia paused outside the room, watching as her sister turned the corner. She then found a nearby guard standing on duty. “Recruit.” The guard immediately stopped walking and saluted diligently.
“Mam?”
“Burn that room,” said Celestia with a beaming smile. She indicated with her head towards the room that Luna and she was just in. The guard looked puzzled by the monarch’s words but nodded in bewilderment. Celestia hummed a happy tune as she trotted on her merry way.
She would forgive her older sisters’ transgressions, but it was best to let sleeping dogs lie in this case. Celestia was glad Luna had never learned about the prototype Lunar Station built by the thinking machines.
That would have been an awkward conversation.
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Tuesday, Friday, silly details in the grand scheme.
It maybe a 2AM story but still quite entertaining!
Ah Fuck.
derpicdn.net/img/2022/9/1/2938917/medium.png
Oh, Bigger Fuck.
It all magic. It's all magic. Magic is everywhere. You might say, Everything... is Magic.
Good story!
"Well sister mine, as you recall we used to have zebras for stuff. Use to chuck em out into the fields with a bucket of ice to help cool them and their foals off while they worked. Them those Abolitionists came in and put them poor people out on the street."
Very silly fun indeed. I like Celestia's attitude, bravo.
In the very far unknown future, in a unknown location. The future versions of the Alicorns reacting to G5;
Future Luna: I can't believe I ever agreed with you. 😑
Future Twilight: I'm screwed up so badly!!!
Future Cadence and Flurry Heart: Where the heck were we when this happened!? 😓
Future Celestia: Me and my big mouth. 😫
Oh hi, Dune and Warhammer 40k. Whether they were on purpose or not, my mind went there.
Let me guess, this occurred in the city that is known as Detrot?
11658109
I agree, it's sad ... but it was inevitable. They were up against a pegasus.
Tia Celeszynski says no to industrial society.
11658158
You mean Cozy Glow?
Yeah, a little evil brat that almost took away all their magic.
I all honesty the other only tech gape that makes no sense is the weapons. In the real world it is not uncommon form communities with in a single national n to be on completely different technological levels. A rise in traditionalisum can lead to communities favor old methods over mire technologcal ones, cultural groups can form that out right reject technology past a certain era, and underdeveloped or very poor places often lack common technologies. The state of the Equestrian military how ever is frankly baffling, they should have at least advanced to muskets and cannons. Equines not being as war like as primates and having magic could explain the lower level of weapon tech, less need for more advanced weapons, but surely guns and canons would be made to deal with monsters!
"The war against the Mares of Iron was such a tiny insiginificant portion of time in the grand scheme of things, I do not know why everyone gets so hung up about it." -The Master of Ponykind, aka Celestia
Fucking Men of Iron
Honestly this is setting equstria to fall to a technological advanced nation, or twlight like in canon.
Honestly should have had a epilogue where it old celestia and luna in a broken and divided equstria with no magic and celestia like not a word sister
11658241
No, I didn't mean Cozy.
For some reason I confused a fanfic and Opanine's canon backstory.
'Twas an early fic that basically poked fun at the writers by saying that if a single character was able to overcome five alicorns and Discord, she'd have to be/have originally been a magic-less pegasus.
(not that the official bs is any less headache-inducing)
Even Twilight has her problems with technology, and she's a fraction of Luna's age, plus she is supposed to be the smart one here.
11658401
Honestly sister, did you never wonder why our population is so small? It took us nearly 500 years just to bounce back to the same numbers we had before you were sent away. I'm just glad that they bought the story about it being due to disease. Really though, Black Death? Not my best moment naming things, I'll admit, but I was rather distracted at the time.
In human history. Many technology was rush to invent because of war. From firework to gun, from communication unit to internet. Many war technology was adapt for daily used. So since Equestria seem a bit lack of world war. I don't think it weird for technology to advance in difference way.
Historical revisionism is such a harsh term. We prefer to say that "we did a little trolling."
This kind of reminds me of a similar story but instead of Luna going caffeine and red string on Celestia, it was the M6 discovering a less than shining example of Celestia's mistakes throughout her long life. The basic premise of the fic was that Celestia had in a way, adopted all of Equestria as her children, and like any mother, was afraid to watch them grow up so it took a great deal of persuasion to even get her to see the benefits of the steam locomotive as an example.
11658063
2AM Stories I find are the most entertaining, for both the reader and the writer!
11658071
Ah another Sunny enjoyer, a person of culture.
11658155
Records of the City in which the Uprising took place are now REDACTED.
11658125
Dune was the inspiration, but now can totally see 40k, damnable ponies of Iron. Hail the Sun Empress of Ponykind!
I guess it's time to drag out this old quote from The Art of Equestria:
So basically all those more advanced items we've seen from time to time were the result of the producers breaking their own rules.
11658970
Did-
Did you just un-reference my reference?
11658326
I've gradually come to the conclusion that Equestria doesn't have any standing army or any "military" that we would recognize as such. The closest thing to Equestria's military that we've seen are the Royal Guards, whose job seems to be palace security and crowd control, and the Wonderbolts, who apparently can be called out to contain a particularly obnoxious monster (like out-of-control Spike). When the changelings invaded, pony society seemed rather helpless to respond.
I think it's not as strange as it may first appear. Even looking at our own world, email exists alongside postal mail. We have airplanes and spaceships, but there are still places where people ride horses. We have quarter-mile-tall steel and concrete skyscrapers, but houses are generally still made from wooden frames.
Also, a lot of specific oddities can very easily be explained by the biological capabilities of the population. No surprise if technological flight never becomes popular when a third of the population can fly. You might argue that the other two thirds can't...but consulting google, it looks like air freight weight per year is over a hundred times that of passenger weight. When pegasi are handling freight, and a third of the population can fly, how much financial incentive is there to build airport infrastructure everywhere? Would it make sense to build a 1000 acre airport in some centralized location from which freight has to be shipped to its final destination when any pegasus can deliver it you your front door in a fraction of the time?
Even if they have the technology, there probably isn't much financial incentive to use it the way humans do.
As for cannons, a third of the population learns levitation as their daily driver spell just to be a functional adult. It's plausible that ballistics aren't effective weapons of war because any competent unicorn can simply pluck them out of the air. I don't recall seeing any bows or crossbows either. Also, ponies in general seem to be very durable and highly resistent to blunt force. Rainbow Dash flying straight into the ground comes to mind. How hard do you have to fire a bullet at a pony for it to hurt? Wouldn't it be easier to have unicorn fire horn lasers instead?
Maybe you want the cannon as an artillery piece, to take down castle walls for example? Again, watch that scene where Rainbow Dash flies straight into the ground hard enough that the explosion produces a mushroom cloud in order to demolish Applejack's barn. Way more effective than a cannon. Instead of developing an entire industry to produce cannon balls that have to be moved around so you can spend hours firing them out of a cannon to take down a wall, how much easier is it for a unicorn battlemage to simply turn the stone of the wall into mud instead? Or to have pegasi throw a tornado at it? Or to tie the wall with rope to house-carrying ponies like Big Macintosh to pull it down?
You probably don't own any horn warmers. It's not because humans lack the technology to make horn warmers. It's just that humans have no use for them.
Similarly, a lot of human uses of technology probably just don't make much sense for ponies.
My own personal headcannon is that tech for Equestria exists around the turn of the century, sometime like very early 1900s. There was a lot of new tech going on at that time right before and after WW1, but most of the areas outside cities still basically lived like it was the 1800s until around the 1920-30s, when they finally started getting developed, at least in the US.
Putting the tech period there covers a lot of stuff we see in the show, and there rest of the stuff can be hand waved with magic or whatever.
This was a great read, and exactly something I'd expect Luna to find out. 10/10
OAH! Spooky Magic Horse!
11659292
Tongue-in-cheek take this story has aside, I’m in agreement with that headcannon that Equestria is actually a late 19th to early 20th century country. With of course a few exceptions as per the art guide which another comment mentioned. I think most of the inconsistencies can be waved away with the existence of magic. But where’s the fun in an old logical explanation such as that?
11659004
They absolutely do not have an army, besides what you can consider as alternative name for 'Royal Guard': "E.U.P. Guard".
I've written around it as that Equestria seems downright obscure from outsiders perspective, a sun-blessed land of mystique where the alicorn dwells (alicorns at the time of the show). You need to be mad to try attacking it, because all previous attempts ended badly for invaders. Ponies just do not need a conventional army, and Celestia actually softly pedaling against such an establishment, working into the ponies minds the idea that all they need for protection is her. So far it worked.
Also guards seem to be protecting cities in general, because Equestria generally is a wild and untamed land. It shouldn't bode well for would-be invaders too, if they are land-based. Good luck reaching Canterlot before it has a chance to respond. Everfree Forest alone seems like a great hindrance of natural origin
I can't not read the title in Seinfeld's voice.
You mean they were always like this?
If you say so...
Good story!
I enjoyed reading it.
11659391
and yet we see that convectional forces work fine too. the changlings first sneak a army to canterlot followed by taking all the leadership hostage with no one knowing.
honestly i like the idea that Celestia is secretly paper tiger and uses the appearance of power overwhelming to keep thing safe.
it works great when no body has the balls to try anything. falls apart when some one does.
11659620
Well, that's how I read her character and how I am now writing about it, yeah
Seems to have worked for her for a long time. Equestria is not a militant nation, it's not ponies' purpose. But then something surely changed when the Elements uncovered...
Also that 'sneaking the army and taking everyone hostage offscreen' part is more like writers' handwave, just as the magic throne that was featured in the same plot, but eh. Part of canon, I guess. Whatever.
11659635
well it helped give us Equestria at War, so handwave is forgiven.
11660143
Small price to pay for pony genocide
yes
Now we know how G5 came about! ha ha
Man, this actually makes me wish we had an episode about this very premise, lol! Nice work!