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OblivionShadow


A Brony and a Gamer!

T

Oblivion Shadow is a master Witcher of the Wolf School. A contract on a Leshens head brings him to the edge of the Northern Realms to answer a call for help. The fight starts off as normal. A second Leshen attack leaves him fighting on two fronts. The Witcher is able to escape, or so he thought when a sharp pain in his back leaves him waking up in Equestria. He is taken in by the Apple family, who treat him as one of their own. He is welcomed by the ponies of this world and he must learn how to accept that or risk upsetting a balance that he did not realize he was a part of. The question he has to ask himself is how does he get back to his world? Or does he even want to go back to a world that is fraught with war and drowning in hate and rage? His senses tell him that monsters from his world are in this new one but he can't seem to track them down. Could his world be bleeding into this one, and how bad will the damage be? He follows the Mane 6 and learns through them what it means to be a friend and a brother.

This is a revamp of the original An Equestrian Witcher. I am trying out a new style with it and altering the characters a bit as I go. Thank you for reading!

Chapters (13)
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Comments ( 139 )

Thanks for the step by step guide and such a detailed info lowes employee login. Nice post!

... ?! What's this? A Rewrite? Think you can do better than the first? Where will this one go? It's already got less words than the other chapter one. What's going on bud?

I dig it. Considering he isn't an alicorn this time I imagine the whole debacle of hiding his wings won't have to be a thing. That would change a lot of the interactions between the characters, and maybe a decent number of plot points.

10426857
Its a rewrite, kind of. The other one will keep going but this one will mirror it in some respects. I heard how much my readers wanted a story without the Alicorn so I figured why not? I have some extra time and I will post it when I have extra time. It's not a huge priority to finish it or catch it up with the other one since that's a really overwhelming amount of chapters to consider. So it's not replacing the original, just a side work for some fun to remind me why I love the original and drive me to work more on it.

10427017
It will definitely make them easier to handle since they are not needing to be hidden. Lol. But they add in some interesting dynamics due to their size and the fact that he does not know how to use them. So it should be something new and kind of fun to work with. :twilightsmile:

Very nice, I do indeed wish for more.

10427783
I am working on the final edit for chapter two. Its proven to be a bit of a pain but so far I think it will work. Thank you for reading!

The black stallion stepped carefully over the red pony and looked up to the mares in the house who were now staring at the Unicorn. He looked from each of them and tried not to look angry.

"Yer eyes are glowing." Was Apple Bloom's commentary.

Oblivion's head looked up and he turned to Applejack who nodded. He looked around and didn't see a mirror close to him. He instead focused and his horn lit once more.

The Unicorn didn't offer any help due to this fact.

I'm guessing these are just leftover remnants, thought I'd let you know.

10428063
Fixed! Thank you for letting me know. I get in the habit of one style of pony and its hard to go against it lol.

Not sure if it’s been suggested yet but have you thought about adding in more monsters than the five in the old version

10431376
I will be adding more as I go to keep things interesting this time around. I am still working on adding more to some of the chapters as I go. :twilightsmile:

The Wither looked at the mare and she was watching him closely.

Witcher

Big Mac looked at the Pegasusand then looked behind him as well.

Needs a space there.

Je paused at the sight and his eyes narrowed slightly at the sight of the purple Unicorn that stood close by her.

He

He said nothing as the family sheered around her.

cheered

10432532
All fixed thank you! I appreciate the help!

I'm wondering how he's gonna keep Celestia from taking the element from him (if he is one this time too), considering he's a pegasus this time hiding magic instead of an alicorn hiding wings

10438446
The magic is pretty much the same as it once was but he is more careful about using it. So he has the option. So he has the option to use it to push her back.

i noticed one thing that's missing from almost every Witcher related fic i have read (i have found 4 in this site not including these two) every Witcher is a master alchemist. so oblivion should know alchemy and herboligy. regardless of the number of Witcher specific potions a witcher can create. most all of them are derived from normal potion+ magical monster parts. and white honey clears toxicity and poison effects. it also cancels any potion effect.... including healing effects from eating...

a Witcher would make an excellent field medic. he would have to. his survival WILL depend on it at some point and its not like a Witcher can just check into a hospital if they are injured.

10448372
That's an interesting point. I had not considered the medicinal aspect of it. I may try to mix that in as I go. Thank you for pointing it out!

“Not a worry. We’ll get this thing pulled apart. Though ah have ta admit ay made it sturdy. Ya did almost too good of a job, we been fightin’ it for an hour and barely made any progress on it. Ah admit all Ah care about is the engraved parts. The rest is scrap for the farm but those Ah want ta keep.”

Ya
?

Twilight when someone says no to Celestia:
*Shocked horse sounds*

10448978
Corrected. Thank you for pointing it out to me! Such a novice mistake to miss lol. :twilightsmile:

Hello, so I was wondering why Twilight was wanting to ask about the timber wolves (I'm assuming that's what they were) and not about how, why or the capabilities of his magic when she mentioned she had questions? Also nice to see another chapter.

10450511
Oh, I get it. Sorry, it took me a minute to reply. I had to figure out what you meant. Now that you mention it maybe I should add something about that as well. I will read it through and see where it might fit in and how to add it in so it flows well enough. Thank you for bringing it up. :twilightsmile:

I wonder how dear old Sunbutt would handle being denied by Oblivion, oh boy, things are getting interesting. And I wonder how long until they find out he's an alicorn?

10458870
Did I miss something and it says Alicorn in there? Crap now I need to go over it again. I was certain I had changed it to be Pegasus only when I retyped the entire thing. The original has him as an Alicorn but he isn't in the reboot. I'm so sorry if I missed something and it was not clear. That's my fault.

10448372
The problem is, Witcher medicine is too potent for normal humans and probably non-alicorns. The Toxicity could kill them rapidly if not instantly. Take Black Blood: I'm sure most mortals would not survive their blood being turned into Vampire Poison.

Sure in Witcher 3, we have a scene where a dying woman is given swallow and survives, but we never hear from her again. And it is inferred that she is either brain dead or in a coma.

10459739
I gave her the swallow and I went to a camp later and the guy she was meeting comes up to you and tells you she is alive but she is kind of off like she sleeps constantly and is pretty out of it. I wasn’t sure if I was glad I gave it to her or not since she’s not really living in that sense.

10460343
I agree, I would rather die than live in an incurable state where I am not in control of my own body.

10461115
That was my thought when I found out what had happened to her. Personally I think I would have rather died. Lol.

In chapter 3

“It is said that the last known location of the six elements was in the ancient castle of the Royal Sisters”

I think you meant to have seven since it was stated earlier and only that the seventh is a mystery.

10462596
Crap. That's what I get for listening to the episodes in the background as I type things out. :twilightsmile:

Edit: Fixed!

hello again, I finally got around to reading this chapter and I enjoyed it. I did notice a few things though, 'The buck was still powerful enough to leave hoof prints in the bark of the tree and the filly yelped. She lost her gold on the tree limb and fell from her perch into the waiting forelegs of her sister.' ; 'Even though the idea was sound he hesitated. “Applejack, I’m not certain this is…” He stope das she held up a hoof to silence him.' ; 'Apple Bloom ran past him and headed for the front door. He pulled the door open and smiled back at him.' (I think this one is supposed to be she) ; 'He said as he thought back to the event. It took a few days to track it and then some time to bait it and then I had to wait for it to return so I could remove it.” He explained.' (I think there's supposed to be another quotation mark) ; that was everything I noticed in my read-through. I hope to see the next chapter soon!

10463701
Fixed. Thank you for letting me know!

A few corrections:

MAC had looked back and stopped when he realized the Pegasus was not with him.

Caps lock got stuck unless you thought Mac's name needed that much emphasis.

His wings drooped to the floor and he stretched out his neck and he heard several small poops as it stretched.

Um, does Oblivion have the runs?

He stood in silence in the middle of the room and was about to lean against the bed from something rolled over him.

Is this supposed to be when?

He dodged out from under it and spun his sword to try to sever the tail it possible.

Should be if.

He jumped back as the weapon began to slip ion his claws and he pulled it roughly from the animal’s throat.

Should be in.

When nopony came to investigate he assumed that it had been quite enough to remain unknown.

Quite the easy mistake to make when you want quiet instead

10466217
Thank you for letting me know. I was rushing to get it ready and forgot to read it over before I published it. I really appreciate the corrections. Thanks! :twilightsmile:

I have yet to read the new chapter but you have already given me great joy. That is how you know you've found a good author.

Something I noticed. ' ...Taller grass as far as she dared. He chuckled at the sight of the black Pegasus as he ran around the edge of the forest. ' Anyway new stuff! Things are getting exiting.

10466389
I'm glad your enjoying it! I fixed the mistake you mentioned and thank you for letting me know.

A smile went across Spikes features as he patted the Pegasus’s leg once more. He got a good look at the tall Unicorn as he stood by him.

Pegasus

Perhaps instead of saying

Break!

you could instead try using FIMFictions page break function


looks much nicer and doesn't take me out of the story when I see Break and think something actually just broke around the characters before reading the next bit and realising it's meant as a page break/scene transition. But that's just my opinion, I'll keep reading it just confuses me at times, especially when I haven't seen it in a while.

And for those of you who don't know how to use it, it's the add horizontal rule button, or you can just type hr inside of these [ ]

He though tot himself as he slid the weapon back into its sheath.

Got yourself an extra t there.

“Applejack nodded. As much as Ah want ya ta be honest.

Need to move the speech marks over.

“There was only one Witcher that was older than I am and I am older one hundred years old.”

Easy way to fix this, change older to over.

He had realized that he did not know how to read their language and he knew that meant he could write in it.

Couldn't.

He had noticed that it was stringer the happier or more exuberant the pony was.

Stronger.

Here we go.”

Needs the opening speech marks.

Tha’ sound bout right fer her. What about Rainbow and Fluttershy?”

Opening speech marks again.

She turned to the baby dragon and took the book ion her magic.

In.

This ability so active at all times and through it,

Is.

“Wow. Who would have thought you were also an artist?” This is great Oblivion.”

One speech mark too many.

While I’m glad that you are doing much better I’m still baffled by what you have told me. I need to find another book.”

Spike if you have other things to do I can have oblivion help me for the time being.”

Opening speech marks.

10459285
Unless you've already fixed it, I didn't notice any instances of him being an Alicorn this chapter so I think you're good on that front.

I’m not sure what to tell you.

Needs opening speech marks.

AS much as I would love to know what you can do I’m not about to push it and definitely not push to the point of an injury.

The second letter doesn't need to be capitalized.

His orange eyes went to the book s that were sitting on the table as she turned to walk back into the library.

Unintentional space.

He closed his eyes as aggravation warred through him and replaced the bit of anger her felt.

He

Witchers are reclusive by design sop we tend to handle things in the way that will suit us best.

So.

The three siblings now stared at him for several seconds before he filly shook herself and went back to work,

The.

“Hey, Blank Flank!” Trying to hide behind your saddlebags? She taunted.

Ending speech mark in the wrong place.

A cutie mark is not mean to be who you are.

Meant.

“Not you too.” She is no longer Nightmare Moon. Don’t be close-minded.”

There is an extra speech mark here.

That was his normal first attack when feeling with the kind of monster in front of him.

I assume you meant dealing?

“Good boy.” He praised as he spun, his sword coming from the scabbard at his side as he drooped the steel sword and baldric to the ground.

Not sure if you did indeed mean drooped or meant to put dropped but I'll put it here anyway, just in case.

He got to his hooves and the monster di the same.

Did.

It backed up and the heat and he pushed his advantage.

At.

10475192
FIxed. Sorry for the delay in replying, been working lol. I normally use the page breaks but I use a serpate correcting software and it doesn't see them as an issue so I tend to forget them. THats my own fault. Lol.

10475510
Fixed! Thank you for all the help!

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