• Member Since 14th May, 2017
  • offline last seen 1 hour ago

Puzzling Frost


likes horse show

E

Ahh the finale, what trip. But a few things were left unanswered. Where was the real Grogar? Why was Cozy evil? Why wasn't Discord punished for nearly ruining everything?
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I have no idea so you get this story instead.

Chapters (3)
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Comments ( 26 )

Goat grandpa's back and he wants his dang bell.

Can't wait to see how this goes!

The idea is interesting, but the huge blocks of text are hard to read. I recommend breaking them up into much smaller paragraphs.

You’re off to an okay start (I share StarlightIsVeryCute's concerns about paragraph length), but the description makes me worried that this story is going to turn into thinly-disguised complaining about the finale.

You’re off to a decent start; however, there’s a little too much information on the villains and thus, making them into huge chunky paragraphs. As some have already advised, divide them into smaller paragraphs. There were barely any spelling mistakes so you’ll do good with this story. Lastly...


DO GROGAR JUSTICE!!!!!

10086177
I thought the profiles were good because they describe their actions and personalities.

10087560
I was suggesting that they be divided into smaller paragraphs so they won’t be too chunky and more readable.

Before I read this, I must know: What exactly happens in this story? The synopsis doesn't say.

Okay, whoever say 'the truth will set you free' should have remember it can cause emotional pain not only to the mind but the heart as well. Also you think Grogar will return Discord's magic or not?

I have a feeling that Grogar is going to take Cozy Glow in as his protege. He does seem to give her praise and feel some sort of sympathy for her.

10090132
Yeah and Grogar made a good point. Did Twilight even find out Cozy had a family?

*Brady bunch intro starts up*

Heres a story, 🎵

Of a guy named Tirek, 🎵

Who once had dreams of bench pressing the world... 🎵

Grogar rebuking and chastising Discord was SOOO satisfying. Thank you. You did a good job with Grogar so far...just as I hoped. Keep it up. Looking forward to the next chapter.


P.S. Grogar showed more concern for the villainous filly then did any of the ponies or creatures. Let that sink in...

10090201

Nothing was ever even brought up about her having a family.....she simply shows up. First she is a cute filly whose heart is in the right place to being a jealous little filly and then on to being evil. I do like to think that she probably had either parents who neglected her and pawned her off on the school or her parents were abusive.....that along with being excluded from the primary clique "the student six" probably caused her to become very jaded and wanted to exact revenge of some sort.

This is a very different and interesting take on Grogar. His chastising of everyone was very satisfying and so was the students and the M6's realization on how they handled Cozy.

I always imagined the REAL Grogar as being like the My Little Pony version of Thanos from the MCU, and I'd say your Grogar is like a more. . .thoughtful Thanos if that makes sense.

Worst timeline averted just in the nick of time! I'm curious what you'll do with this interesting premise. I'm with TheClownPrinceOfCrime in that the villains' backstory can be cut. I almost did the same thing in my story but someone rightly pointed out that we all know exactly who they are, with the result that people will just skim over all this text. Try to make sure that every paragraph is interesting and serves a real purpose.

This chapter is hilarious to show that friendship magic was just dumb luck. Also will Tirek, Chrysalis and Cozy tell Grogar that Discord brought Sombra back to life?

I love Grogar in this chapter. I couldn’t stop laughing 😂!! Great job!

Grogar really is just a tired old man that wants these kids off his lawn, huh? Except it just so happens this tired old man could absolutely destroy you if he wanted to.

Some fun little jabs at canon in this one, I shouldn't enjoy them as much as I do.

10099767
I agree and I thought Grogar would take Discord to do something Discord would hate, like... wash the dishes for the next 5000 years without magic.

So the Bell really IS this world's version of the Infintu Gauntlet. I guess my comparison of Grogar to Thanos was closer than I thought it was.

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