• Member Since 7th Dec, 2015
  • offline last seen Yesterday

Solstice Shimmer


One that somehow finds time to overthink about magical ponies, and sometimes write about it.

T
Source

The following is based off the studies of Princess Twilight Sparkle, everything disclosed in this is not be revealed to the public until a higher understanding of this has been reached.

The magic of dreams have fascinated Twilight for a while now. So she decides to do what she always does. Study it. But maybe she shouldn't have messed with this one.


Cover Art by Jowybean. (all credit goes to him)
Made Comprehensible by Shrink Laureate
Somehow conjured up by one of my sleep paralysis episodes

Chapters (1)
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Comments ( 9 )

Bernhard's door, eh? I like. You've got an interesting story here, but I'm not sure you've done your best with it.

You did a good job with the format, and it was clever to have Spike do the writing. That way some of the minor slip ups can be chalked up to his inexperience.

That being said, I have a few questions regarding the story. How did the ponies dealed with no protection in the dream realm while Luna was banished? How about before that? When Twilight is having her sleep paralysis episode, why didn't Luna try to help her? How does Twilight know she's in a dream from the get go? Was there some procedure involved to start lucid dreaming? It's not specified, so I don't know. Why is the Abstract longer than the analysis and conclusion segments, aside from the logs?

Also, a few sentences here and there feel needlessly convoluted. Take this excerpt, for example:

I trust you have read the papers I sent along with this letter you now hold now in your magic? If not you should read them before you continue this letter, then all I say will make sense.

How does Luna know Celestia is holding it in her magic and she didn't put it on her desk? How does that add any impact to what she's saying? She could just say she should read the papers attached to the letter so it all makes sense.

Don't take this as me saying your story is bad, because it's quite intriguing, and it has a lot of potential, but it needs more work to really shine, and I feel you can do it, should you take the time.
Cheers!
:twilightsmile:

I hope Luna can save her.

The image for the story lunas face just screams “TROLL”

9267192
This wasn’t intended to evolve into anything more than it is. (A writer with lots of spooky/terrifying encounters testing the waters of horror) But anything is possible:scootangel:

This was an interesting story. Aside from a few smeg-ups with sentence structure, the overall idea was good. I suppose having Twilight not having been rescued was one way to end this story, but I'm not sure it was the best way. On the other hand, some stories only work if there are questions unanswered.

Huk

OK, I’m confused by the ending… Does it mean that the ‘Luna’ Twilight talked to before conducting the experiment was some imposter or was Twilight already dreaming at the time?

9350665
The "Luna" present during her experiments wasn't really Princess Luna.

Huk

9353946

OK, thanks for the info :twilightsmile:

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