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In my opinion, leave Spike in his real body, not Humdrum’s. Two reasons: one, it would be more canon to the show, and two, Spike, being a dragon instead of a colt, has two hand-like claws, a long, prehensile tongue, and a ridged (possibly two) dick(s). (More options for pleasing a mare(s).)
Excellent start to a very interesting story can't wait for more to come hopefully!
Lol keep him pure say the mare who hasn't given any good physical lovin attention to spike. I say let him have his fantasies in the comic it ain't hurting anyone.
I like the idea of literally going into a comic and experience those fanatsies.
Good story
I think this is a very interesting story and I like what you have done with some character building here. I do tho find Rarity and Spike with such a odd relationship to be honesty. I mean she herself has stated that Spike is adult really in every sense of the world. But she treat him JUST like a child, she even took his book and was about to destroy it without even caring what he could say or feel. There are a few more sense that support this but it just comes off as odd that Spike is just taking all of this with a smile not even showing any internal conflict about her treatment of him. But then she goes and shows some very possessive characteristics but it is unknown what the base of that comes from. Is it romantic or just she feels like deep down no one should have him but her and nothing should risk taking his attention from her? Honestly at the moment it feels the later one is the moth likely since we haven't seen anything so far to show romantic interest from her but it is just the first chapter. And what if the PP treat Spike not as a child or as a side character, or as a pack mule, but as a equal in all respects how much would that mean to him to be treated and respected like everyone else for once.
Rarity's going Semi-Yandere.
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Thank you all for the support. I'll give more hindsight about what really happens between Rares and Spike in the next chapter. Hopefully, I'll finish the edition of it between tomorrow and the Tuesday.
I definitely like the start of this, especially since it's showing that there are some feelings for a couple of the Power Ponies (the actual ones, not the Mane 6 in Power Pony cosplay).
Also to the one that was commenting on how they wish Spike in the Humdrum Costume would be in his actual dragon form as opposed to a Quantum Leap thing where everypony in the comic see Humdrum as a pony but we the audience see Spike in Humdrum's body, I would love to see that as well...though it would be interesting to have the actual Power Ponies see Humdrum as a dragon instead of a pony.
Off topic, but I wonder why no one has thought about the idea of the Mane 6 and Spike meeting the actual Power Ponies, similar to what happened in the S7 finale Shadow Play, where the Elements Bearers meet the actual predercesors to the Elemenst--The Pillars of Harmony (StarSwirl and the Legends). Just a thought.
Zapp.
If Rarity wants to get rutted by Spike then just tell him.
Zapp
This was a interesting chapter for sure. I would honestly think that Spike for now would have very mix feelings about the situation. As somedragon that has shown he is attracted to ponies there would be a slight feeling a joy that FINALLY someponies are showing a desire for him and not treating him like he is a child but like someone they can be intimate with. But on that same note as of now all he know about his fav hero is that he does the chores and he is their glorified sex toy they pass around and use whenever they want to. He hasn't seen them show that they love him just that he get their rocks off when they are stressed. Those aren't empowering things for Hum's character in fact those are kinda demeaning things he has found out about him.
Another really interesting thing is the difference between Hum and Spike. One major difference is Spike is a Dragon. That may not seem like much but this whole dynamic the PP have with Hum will effect Spike so much differently than it did with the canon Hum. As we saw Spike took it to a whole new level that Masked have never seen of Hum. And that was just really stimulation of his tail. If he had full intimacy his dragon instinct will kick in hard and he will do all he can to ruin the mare. Which will also have a major change in Spike himself as well. He has never been the one that mares have shown any sign of desire and want towards, now he has these mare that not only show it but have also seem to very much enjoy his dragonic love making.
I do honestly think tho that you could use a proof reading just to go over some of the grammar errors that kinda cut into the flow of the story.
I think we could see more about the origin of the PP and Hum, how did they meet, got their powers, how did this whole dynamic with Hum come into place. We could also see that things aren't all perfect with the PP. I mean if you read any Team based comic there is always drama of some kind going on with the team and the PP wouldn't be any different.
I think next honestly Radiance would be the best pick for who is next. I know the Rarity look alike many think should be saved but I think having her be next at THIS time would hold the most impact. Right now Spike has just triggered his dragon lust and instinct to a point he hasn't ever before. So he will be dueling with that at the moment. But for him to come across the object of his affection. And not only that but THIS version doesn't treat him like a child, but also as someone who is her equal, and the biggest thing shows she has true affection and lust for him would be huge right now. It would trigger that dragon desire and unlike with Masked he may even be the one to start it. Which will be a huge thing, not to mention it would be the perfect one for him to have full intercourse with and trigger his instinct to take him to a whole new level. It is the one that would have the most impact and set him up to be more receptive to the other girls making it more likely for use to see him be intimate with them.
I honestly LOVE this idea. these little chapter diving into the Spike and Rarity relationship. Building on it, showing how this isn't just a black and white thing for them but a really gray area for them both. I so think she should ask Rarity that if Spike has the mentality of a adult, is LEGALLY a adult, than is her only issue is that he look young? Are they willing to deny their 'love' just because he looks the way he looks? For sure she will have to ask Rarity about if she think this way about Spike, than honestly why does she treat him like a child so much. She said it herself that she know he is adult mentally and maturity but I just can't help but feel she has moments where she look down on him. That could be something she does just from the way he look, something she isn't proud of but she can't help but do it sometime. I can see that being a major strain between the two of them. Showing that even tho things look so perfect between the two of them it really isn't. She knows that Spike couldn't stand seeing her go out on date in the past and she honestly has her own jealousies.... or more like possessiveness when it comes to Spike herself. She could even comment how she honestly deep down if she admit to herself doesn't like Ember because she think if anyone is going to take Spike away it will be her for sure. This could also have a interesting effect on the main chapters. With Spike being a grown dragon really, lets face it he would deep down be so damn happy to finally have SOME kind of intimacy that isn't on the same level as a foal with a crush would receive. Sure Hum seemingly has to do all the chores and things, which sucks for sure, but he seem to get more respect for it than Spike does in the real world.
Kinda surprised, figured Radiance would be when Rarity popped in, not before.
Also, very nice work. I look forward to more.
A really nice interlude, but I can't wait for more inter'lewds' ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
The dragon Spike
Dragon the spike
Spike dragon the
Spike the dragon
The spike dragon
Dragon spike the
Lol
Radiance, definitely!
You should really finish the story. Also, I think Zapp should be next.
You dead?
If the Power Ponies were voiced, what would they sound like?
Great chapter. Can't wait for more!
Please let Filli Second be next.
This was interesting for sure, It is great seeing Spike struggle with his inner dragon. I wonder how much influence i will grow to have. I think honestly his resistance is pretty weak, I think it will best chance break by the next girl for sure. I am honestly really hoping it is Saddle Ranger watching them. I mean just think of shy timid Fluttershy watching her lifelong friend getting her face fucked. And even if Spike wont admit it, which he SOOO will by the end of it will find it hot having her watch wide eyed but unable to look away as he fuck Dash's throat, the cocky super cool one of his friends sucking him off like she can't get enough of him. I can even see him starting to grow in her mouth till he is just wreaking her all the while he is looking Shy in the eye and licking his lips causing the submissive mare to almost present to him right there lol. Dash is going to get a dragon size load and end up with a bloated and full stomach with it dripping from her nose and mouth all while her Ranger watches lol. I think that might trigger some more dragon in him. I hope the next chapter comes out soon so we can see what will happen next.
Spike should know he didn't betray Rarity since they never been a couple!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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That is the big major thing I kept shouting at myself as I was reading this. He is feeling guilt over someone he isn't in a relationship with. Not to mention with fictional characters who aren't really alive
So, you need to reread this chapter for edits, cause while it is really good. Multiple times you use his or he to refer to Zapp and that's rather derailing when trying to figure out which character is doing what or having what done to them.
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Thanks for pointing it out, I'll handle those mishaps today.
Any chance this is still being worked on?
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currently no (for more info, read my last blog update), sorry to tell you this, but my fic is going for a trip into the hiatus section (along side the other long term fics of mine)
How long will it take until I brought this back to live? -don't know. in the best escenario I could even rewrite this and polish it in the process.