• Member Since 3rd Oct, 2013
  • offline last seen 15 hours ago

SonicBlitz18


A rocking brony with a love for crossover and adventure. Currently part time in college

Comments ( 278 )

Mm.... I Like So Much This Idea For History

And when he is done they all become his slaves lol

I like the idea behind this story, but you seriously need an editor.

Celestia's sun shined brighty over thr horizen,

Said Barb as she spread her reptilian wings out a glided down to the ground and sets the box of books down.

Starlight comes down wearing blue jeans with a red blouse and hoof sandels.

"Thanks again go helping me do this guys."

And these are just the first few I saw.

Interesting idea, but I would agree you need a good proofreader.

If you slow it down a little, like take a bit longer to describe in full how this is affecting him, it would be an excellent read. Also, you could've had a chapter to show how the vilanesses got together.

I loved it so far can't wait to see what's next .I hope all make a herd and he becomes there master and Molestia joins to..And he keep good dusk and he makes his own herd.

I literally had to stop reading this for my own physical and mental health. Like I began to cringe and seize every time you made another grammar mistake, or a plot hole reared its ugly head. It wasn't pleasant.

The story seems generally rushed, and what isn't rushed makes not a lot of sense.

The seven mares watched in awe and confusion as they waited twenty seconds for him to transformation.

Terrible grammar aside why did no one try and stop him. Seriously twenty seconds is actually quite a bit of time, and odly specific. Like did someone time it, did they have a stop watch handy, if so why do that when you could try and stop the potential threat.

It's an interesting idea I guess. Just you need to get an editor or something, put a little more thought and effort into it. Otherwise good work you posted it which is a lot more than some people can say, and I can guarantee you I wrote worse back in high school.

Hey^10
THIS Story is very good.
I like it. I kinda feel pity for Sonata.
She's CUTE.

Did you pushed the publish button for error?
Because I recived a message where you published a new chapter.

awesome another chapter man nice

The collars probably mean that she is his sex slave and will let him do to her whatever he wants; wherever he wants; whenever he wants. I am curious as to how he is going to do one siren while keeping the other one from leaving/interfering?

Would have been better if he left before the other sirens arrived. That way, they'd see the aftermath and the FEAR of what they'd unleashed will run rampant as he hunts them one by one.:pinkiecrazy:

*slow claps* ya did good sonic, ya did good.

That was awesome I can't wait to see whats next.

Lol, that frying pan moment made me imagine this:
66.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_ll1nunmq0U1qb6kd0o1_500.gif

"Rather interesting to see you in your underwear, you whelp." Umbra said

Heheh! The same could be said about both you and Nightmare Moon and your armor lingerie. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Also, I hope you continue this story. I'd really love to read how he ravages Nightmare Moon. :trollestia:

Je connais la langue, Sonicblitz18. But I'll let you say what it means in the story. Also, when are you going to make the next chapter. I can't wait to see it in the future.

YES my faith and loyalty have been rewarded with 3 whole chapters

LUNA'S SWEET PLOT I DIDN'T KNOW MORE CHAPTERS WERE ADDED!!! YAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

Great chapter. I like seeing new chapters in THIS Story.
THIS Story is AWESOME!!!

Great chapter, But I notice some mistakes.

Why do I have the feeling he is going to do something to Philomena. :pinkiegasp:
And I also notices a little mistake.

I love this story very much and wanted to reread the first chapter again as you have edited it. You have 2 problems from what I read. First being that this,

Dusk soon opened his eyes to reveal that they became red and that his pupils were now slits

is repeated again. 2nd, is that you have a ( in front of a word and it's at the part of villians splitting up to go and find Dusk. That's all I have to say and hope to see this story continued:pinkiehappy:

THAT WAS AWESOME!!!!!!!!:flutterrage::flutterrage::flutterrage::flutterrage::pinkiecrazy::pinkiecrazy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy:I love it all I can't wait to see what happens next.

That was great chapter I can't wait Intel the next one.

That was awesome read.Happy New year to you to.

Wouldn't it be 'henhood' instead of 'birdhood', you know since a female bird is usually referred to as a hen, not just chickens.
Happy Newar year too!!!
P.s. i just can't resist
Philomena:My minds telling me no. But my body, my body's telling me yes!!!

YES NEW CHAPTER AND HAPPY NEW YEAR

Can't wait for Nightmare Moon and Chrysalis' s chapters. There's just something so utterly delicious of having Dusk bang the baddest bitches in FIM.:heart:

Adagio couldn't hd back her moans

hold, not hd.

As for why I am here... well it's always the quiet ones, right?

"The fuck do you think you're doing asshole!?" Aria shouted as she had a bat in her hand.

Your sister.

"Wh-what are you gonna do with that?"

You.

You know, this isn't a bad clopfic, really it's not. BUT, the constant spelling and grammar mistakes REALLY take away from the experience. They're painfully all over the place. I hate to sound rude but, did you even look this over to make sure you were satisfied with this once you'd finished posting it?

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