• Member Since 5th Oct, 2014
  • offline last seen Mar 9th, 2018

TJHoofer


How did I get here? Oh wait... Now I remember... Ponies. Amature artist and wannabe writer. Guess I had to start somewhere...

Sequels1

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In the climatic finale of the Battle of the Bands, the Rainbooms battle the Dazzlings.

...And fail.

Beaten and broken, the Rainbooms are unable to stop the Dazzlings from achieving their victory and regaining their true siren forms. Now the sirens are back to claim the Human World as their own and become its new rulers.
However, before that can be done, their first order of business is to dispose of their enemies in the one delicious way they know how.

Can Twilight, Sunset and the Rainbooms escape? Or will they all become the Dazzling's sacrifical meal?



NOTE: This is a VORE fic. So if you're squeamish, not into vore or simply don't like it, then don't read this at all.

There's no gore or fatality present.

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 74 )

Might read this, I liked your story Get Him a lot, I just hope there's a happy end to this story.

7055689 In a way it 'kinda' does. It depends on how you look at it.

It's more like a sad ending with hint of hope.

UM, STILL FEELING SAD HERE, UMMM, SEQUEL PLEASE??!:raritydespair::raritycry::applecry::fluttercry::fluttershbad:

I really like how this starts off looking like a generic vore story and then ends up being something completely different.

Bravo, sir.

7057843 Thank you :twilightsmile:

I like to add a few twists here and there just to keep the Readers guessing. Make something seem very dark and then suddenly add a little light at the end.

A good read, but the ending could've been better.

Will you continue it?

7058570 I originally planned a darker ending by having the Dazzlings consume everyone at CHS :twilightoops: But in the end it felt too uncharacteristically forced and a wee bit TOO dark, so I opted to end it on a lighter note :twilightsheepish:

But if it's something else about the ending you feel should be added or fixed, feel free to share and I'll see what I can do :twilightsmile:


7058899 I have thought about it.

If I do make a sequel to this, it'll mostly be about the Dazzlings turning the Human World into their personal playground and treating their already bedazzled human subjects like slaves, amusement or (on occasion) as food, with Sunset and the Rainbooms helplessly observing and desperatly trying to find a way to escape.

A sub-plot would involve princess Twilight trying to re-establish a portal to the Human World and gradually getting closer each time.

It would get intensly more darker and hopeless for the Human World before it gets any better... :applejackunsure:

*Alondro sorta slinks shyly toward the seapony demon predator things....* Uhm... when you're through digesting them... can... can I go next? You're kinda sexy carnivores and I'd be honored to become part of your glorious bodies.

*The Sirens are like O______O* Holy shit... IT'S A VORE!!! RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!!! It might be contagious! *they flee in terror*

:trollestia:

7063341 Why would that scare them? They're sirens.

(Unless it's that old Looney Tunes logic that a predator simply refuses to eat a WILLING prey because they might be sick or poisoned...)

7063840 Loony Tunes, or Tom and Jerry from the same era.

I do love the classics.

So rare for voralaphiliacs like me to be blessed with a story involving sirens. Makes me wanna snuggle up in Sonata's stomach and live the rest of my life in her belly. :rainbowkiss:

Hm... interesting.

7092954 :derpytongue2: Silly, isn't it?

7098833

I did not know you were into this kind of...stuff.

"Well he did make a story where the mane characters chased around a human for various resons, so I for one would not be suprised if he made a story about humans living inside ponies".

DONT GIVE HIM IDEAS METAWOLF!!!!!

7099376 Not to worry :twilightsmile: I'm more into the more subtle and/or harmless side of it.

7100148 I don't suppose you have a sequel in the works

7111638 I've already got something planned, but as of now it's a work in progress.

7112192 any chance you can add an extra ending where there fully absorbed into the Sirens mind, body, & soul & their somehow still alive through the Sirens seeing & feeling the evil experiences of the Sirens ( got that idea from an episode of teen titans called haunted raven kinda posses robin sees nothing then slade appears she Feels the punch he delivered to robin) then after feeling the power course through them they decided to hunt other potential magical humans, like the human counter parts of shinning armor, cadance, Luna, celestia, (Trixie for the heck of it) Starlight glimmer, lightning dust, & EQG,s world twilight & so on. what do you think?

7112458

any chance you can add an extra ending where there fully absorbed into the Sirens mind, body, & soul & their somehow still alive through the Sirens seeing & feeling the evil experiences of the Sirens ( got that idea from an episode of teen titans called haunted raven kinda posses robin sees nothing then slade appears she Feels the punch he delivered to robin)

At the moment I have a different idea around that. They won't be absorbed, but they will influence the sirens in some form :raritywink:

then after feeling the power course through them they decided to hunt other potential magical humans, like the human counter parts of shinning armor, cadance, Luna, celestia, (Trixie for the heck of it) Starlight glimmer, lightning dust, & EQG,s world twilight & so on.

Interesting idea, but it would be difficult explaining how the human counterparts of Twilight, Trixie, Celestia (etc.) suddenly have magical abilities.
Maybe pony Twilight will have a hoof in that? I'll think about it :twilightsmile:

I wish there was more vore stuff with the Dazzlings, whether it be in their human or siren forms; and that the people they eat get digested, whether it be visual or implied, I mean hey, that's what stomachs are for right?

Well. This story is legit good. Like, GOOD good, not the normal. I'd like to see how it turns out...

SEQUEL!!!!

“That reminds me of a video I saw the other day. About this weird movie critic who kept yelling a lot.”
“Who's that?”
“I don't remember his name, but he does so I wouldn't have to.”

I. LOVE. YOU...
A Nostalgia Critic reference in a fimfiction

7490632

Sequel is currently in development :twilightsmile:

Process is slow at the moment, but hopefully new chapters will arrive this year :twilightsheepish:

My favorite character and fetish all in one. Love it

Very intriguing. Very rarely do you see someone do something interesting with the concept of "vore." Normally, authors who write on the subject just create a way to "vent" their...imaginations, so to speak. As an Author-in-Progress myself, it's nice to find someone who doesn't just do it for the sake of *cough cough* well, you probably know. No need to dive too deep into THAT subject

That said, this was a rather engaging read. There was defiantly some moments of dread, so the story lives up to the "Dark" "Drama" and "Sad" tags you placed on it. Part way through reading this, I forgot it was a vore-based story and more of a Horror/Drama thing. Very nice work, and I am looking forward to the sequel (I've already red what you posted so far on that. Nice work with the nightmare scene).

But no review would be complete without constructive criticism, and my one complaint with this tale...actually isn't anything with the story itself. It's actually with the "Inside of the Dazzlings" scenes. The idea of it just being a fleshy room with a gem window feels...too physical for what it looks like you're going for. I honestly thought that during Rainbow's tantrum that one of the sirens would hear them or something. I feel like it should have been a room made out of the gemstone, or an endless void of red light, crystal and smoke with the only outside light coming from the "window." But, that's just me. Every writer has their own "visions" for how to tell their stories. And the interior of the Dazzlings (that feels weird to say, even with proper context...) in this case was good, but just not what I was expecting.

Also, this part has absolutely nothing to do with the past page and a half rant (sorry for that, by the way). But while reading this, I decided to google search "Dazzling true forms" to give myself a reminder of what they looked like so I wasn't just imagining flying inconsistent blobs while reading. Then I found this fan-art image, which I think fits in pretty well with the scenario you've described here. And I felt like sharing it. So to anybody reading this comment, enjoy~
derpicdn.net/img/2014/11/15/764817/large.png

Long story short, Nice story, I really liked it, sorry for the rant, eagerly awaiting continuation of sequel, have a nice day.
Buh bye!

7534313 Glad you liked the story :twilightsmile:

And thanks for sharing your criticism.

The part about Sunset and the High Five being trapped inside/behind the Dazzling's gems in a fleshy room did feel a bit physical. Guess it just looked creepier in my head...

The whole idea was that the Elements they represent probably "saved" them from a cruel fate of digestion and caused the sirens bodies to magically transfer them inside a fleshy pocket dimension behind the gems.

Or if that's too far fetched, they really did perish and their souls are forever trapped in the gems in a fleshy "Hell". Sunset states she isn't really sure what happened. Whichever way it was, they'll discover that they won't starve or feel the need to "go"...

Nevertheless, the end result is still bad for our heroes.

7534388
Ah, going for the creep factor, that makes some sense. Honestly I should have realized that myself.

But too be fair, I'd rather be trapped in a fleshy room then be slowly digested and turned into seahorse poo. The second one just sounds way less pleasant to me. Then again, I'm the one who's trying to deeply analyze a vore story. I'm probably insane! :pinkiecrazy:

7534388 Was this a one shot or will there be a follow up?

7596172 Don't worry. There is a sequel in the works :twilightsmile:

7596302 Yeah I kind of found it after posting the comment.

A could clean nommer story
There need to be more like this

7534388 Your chosen ending was the best. Anything that leaves prey trapped rather than dealt with is always the best choice. Everything else works and it's fine, but no death vore is best vore.

Comment posted by Sincea-pony-guy1 deleted Dec 17th, 2017
Comment posted by Sincea-pony-guy1 deleted Dec 17th, 2017
Comment posted by Sincea-pony-guy1 deleted Dec 17th, 2017
Comment posted by Sincea-pony-guy1 deleted Dec 17th, 2017

hey buddy I love your stories, hey um do you have a Google plus account?

(Please reply)

8615225 Nice to know you like my stories. Thank you :twilightsmile:

8615783
Your welcome ^^ do you have a Google plus account? Or youtube account?

8615791
I wanna chat with you and rp with you :) please?

8615793 I don't really do rp, sorry ^^

But thanks for asking :twilightsmile:

Comment posted by Sincea-pony-guy1 deleted Dec 17th, 2017
Comment posted by Sincea-pony-guy1 deleted Dec 17th, 2017
Comment posted by Sincea-pony-guy1 deleted Dec 17th, 2017
Comment posted by Sincea-pony-guy1 deleted Dec 17th, 2017
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