• Member Since 19th May, 2015
  • offline last seen Yesterday

Naroe_Clan


something, something, writer?

T

The Adeptus Astartes, great defenders of mankind. Unless they're just some guy who's been thrust into being one due to the whims of fate and some sort of extra-dimensional being. Especially so when that guy is weird, possibly likes classical literature a bit too much, and might be a little insane.

A displaced story and my first story that I've shared anywhere, so please be gentle with your scathing comments.

Warhammer 40k/MLP crossover. all copyrights to their respective owners, Games Workshop and Hasbro.

Chapters (12)
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Comments ( 146 )

Well that was an interesting start. It's rather well written for a first time story. A lot of purple prose though and we don't get much information on the main character, hopefully that will change later on in the story. Having him be released by Nightmare Moon is an interesting touch. Have a like and a follow.

I love it. Please continue.

Goddamnit I thought this fucking LoHAV shit had died out

5995297 obviously not if there are new authors out. It is an interesting concept and I guess MLP story genre now? I know the Displaced one is very well thoughtout.

5995232 Thanks. I'll try not to disappoint.

However, despite his worries, Shining Armor is a pony of the royal guard and he has his duties to attend to before allowing himself to panic and chase after his sibling.

You're a terrible fucking brother. If I was in his spot, I would've abandoned my post to save my sister.

5995297 not sure if it is a LOHAV yet, gotta have to read more before i place that tag on it, for the moment is just another displaced fic, i just hope it doesnt go trigger happy with the crossovers further ahead

Its head is almost scraping the ceiling as it walks, and its massive foot stomps down and causes another tremor through the stone floor. It seems to suck color from the world around it and spread darkness as it moves. As Shining Armor lets out an unwilling whimper its head slowly turns towards him and his attention fixes upon the pits of fire from tartarus within the visage of bleached bone. That fire fills his vision until the creature finally passes from view as it continues its march.

knups.nl/temp/29

i.imgur.com/Zw7f8d8.jpg
^Larger version of cover also awesome chapter can't wait to see whats next :pinkiehappy:
^Also is this how he looks? Cause that must have been some top tier cosplay :rainbowderp:

6013977 I actually have the larger version, but when posting it the site wanted me to crop it a bit. or something like that.
Also, if this: http://www.litewavemedia.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2014/09/2754-Warhammer-Logo.jpg is a thing, then having a chaplain isn't unreasonable. definitely would be top-tier though.



6014338

Dammit, I'm fucking scared of spiders. Read the warning in the beginning of chapter 4 and now I'm scared to read it.

6026932 *tries not to laugh maniacally. does not succeed* MWAHAHAHAHA!
but in all seriousness, due to how short the chapters are, it's only creepy crawlies for a moment which is there in order to introduce Chaplain's abilities.


question: would people like shorter chapters more frequently, or longer chapters more spaced out? I'm gonna try to make the whole story the best I can (make of that what you will) but I'm wondering what people think. and by shorter chapters I mean less than 2k words like I've been mostly writing so far.

just kept on reading everything from the beginning interesting story so far always something Warhammer universe had so much potential but was messed by some messed up by politics I guess that's why they call it grimdark I really hope I can see you continue updating
by the way is your character Emperor of mankind level or close to it just curious

if I remember correctly there is a story about spider ponies on this site and not ponies that have spider powers I mean eight legged spider morph ponies now there's your cute and cuddly this is actually an edit after I read all the comments

6052791 warhammer 40k is the origin of the term grimdark.

he and the emperor have powerful abilities that aren't really able to be compared to each other because they're usable in different ways. the emperor is stated to be the most powerful psycher to ever exist in 40k canon, but I don't think he is stated to be able create objects from nothingness using those abilities. however, in a stand-up fight the emperor could just plain win due to overwhelming power.

Comment posted by ginnight deleted Jun 4th, 2015

6053028
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thanks? I didn't think it was THAT good. but yeah, thanks!

6054099 I've been looking for one of these Space marine displaced for a long time m80. In fact I've been searching for a regular human gets sent to equestria as a spehss mehrene for a long time.

>6052898 sorry about the garbled text. my voice to text must have changed we had written down well I wasn't paying attention. also I'm curious what group is he affiliated with also are you going to follow the standard format where in bit and pieces other Warhammer40k universe stuff start showing up I mean small pieces not full regiments coming and saying nice planets now it's ours. or heaven forbid the Inquisition shows up and says heresy and EXTERMINATUS the planet. come to think of it for Inquisition that's actually the best case scenario cuz they might just turn Equestria into a research area but those are just my thoughts

hope this continues, looks good.

Yeah, that's about right for the ponies and tia

6138827

Turning on the ones who had saved and protected them? The ponies ignoring the fact that it was one pony driven mad by the loss of his family? The ponies ignoring the fact that all of the others of his kind fought against him and saved them all?

Yeah, that does sound like them. Sometimes, the ponies can be wretched little shits.

Wait... Is he an Interrogator Chaplain of the Dark Angels? I just want to make sure if what I'm thinking is correct.

Spiders? Ha! Nothing but a bug beneath my boot, but, I do enjoy this story, keep on keeping on.

6245534 I've been thinking more along the lines of Black Templars. that image was just the best one I could find.


Also: I'm working on the next chapter. I'm just being remarkably lazy and sorta uninspired. It'll be here eventually.

>First

Thank the Omnissah! Another chapter has been released for my Occular implants to behold and read in all its glory!

You have an Astartes in the story. That usually is enough to warrant the gore tag.

6340724 I would offer you some but my Forge World is too busy producing Lemun Russ's

oh god, please tell me that gilgi isn't getting involved JUUUUST yet.
we don't need him freaking the hell out all over your Chaplin.

6343931 I haven't even talked to Shinigamisparda about a crossover. I'd really quite like to do so at some point, but at this point I've just added the tokens and have no definite plans yet.

why are so many stories main characters distant relations to pinky pie? its not a complaint or anything, but, its something i would like to know.
more please!

6463398 It's how some of them explain Pinkies strangeness and abilities. Just like this one seems to be doing if the old signs hold true.

6463398 I actually can't remember any stories that I've read where the main character is related to Pinkie. Personally I just thought it'd be fun and a possibly interesting plot point. (maybe even a plot device)

OKAY, i can believe that pie backstory.

6463428 ok. i look forward to seeing what you do with it.:pinkiehappy:

Hey! Great chapter! Seems like dis stuff gonna be good! And Black Templar? The picture is that of a Dark Angels Interrogator Chaplain... Or maybe I am mistaken... I shall check the Dark Angel Codex, but, what I really want to ask... Is would you be willing for a crossover anytime soon? I'm just wondering... I still have yet to have my Displaced send out a totem, but he will... I was just wondering if you would want to do one...

Dude... I fucking loved this chapter... The whole entrance was badass... Man I really want Kent to meet this guy! He's awesome!

6464080 Yeah, I'm pretty sure that the picture is of a Dark Angel, but I haven't found a good picture of a black Templars chaplain in the same sort of style.

And, sure we could work out a crossover at some point. Possibly after I figure out how exactly how that even works...I mean, who actually does the writing? Do we pass a file back and forth? Does one of us write and the other one advise? So many questions and such confusion......

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