The meeting
Morning in Ponyville shimmered and shined, and truly everything within the town was going to be just fine. Not that Twilight Sparkle would know; she was, as per usual, hidden within the bowels of the library, her muzzle deep in a book.
Until a loud bang filled the library.
Twilight looked up to see the library door dramatically thrown open. A bright light temporarily blinded her, and she blinked hard, trying to clear the spots from her eyes. After shaking her head, she squinted, trying to see who had just come in.
“Greetings, from the world of tomorrow!” a very familiar voice cried out, just as the voice’s owner stepped forward with a serious smile, wings spread wide.
“Wait, what?” Twilight backed up a few steps, quickly taking stock of the being in front of her. Purple fur, large horn, navy blue mane, colored streak, fairly tall, wings larger than most… wait, wings?
Alicorn Twilight grinned. “Hello, me! I’m you—from the future!”
Unicorn Twilight’s ear flicked as the word ‘future’ seemed to echo several times. She lifted an eyebrow and snorted, “Again?”
Not possible... the spell it said—
Alicorn Twilight’s grin grew wider as she simply and wordlessly nodded.
“But… but I already used that spell! I can’t use it again! That’s not scientifically possible. You’re not scientifically possible!” Unicorn Twilight declared. She walked up to the taller Alicorn Twilight and poked her in the chest with a hoof for emphasis.
Alicorn Twilight grinned. “All right, you got me! I’m just kidding—I’m actually you from a parallel universe.” She beamed and gave a winning smile to her unicorn self.
Unicorn Twilight blinked a few times, allowing everything to sink in before smiling. She relaxed her expression. “Huh. Well that’s a bit odd. Though it certainly explains the wings. I must have been born an alicorn in your world. I mean, you must have been born an alicorn. Oh! Is your entire world nothing but alicorns? But, wait, if it was, how would you tell who is royalty and who isn't? Oh! Do Princess Celestia and Princess Luna have two hor—”
Alicorn Twilight rolled her eyes as she put her hoof into her unicorn self’s mouth. “Actually, no. I was born a unicorn, like you. I just turned into an alicorn recent...ly... are you all right, Twilight?”
She raised an eyebrow, as about halfway through her explanation, her alternate’s jaw had fallen open and her eyes seemed to actually be displaying static.
Alicorn Twilight groaned and smacked herself in the face. “Brilliant job, Twilight! Open with a joke, you said! It’ll help break the ice, you said! Well, now I’ve gone and broken myself! That’s the last time I listen to me!” she grumbled. “Spike is right. When my reflection starts talking, I need to learn to ignore it.” She sat down with a groan.
A moment later though she sighed, rubbing her forehead again. “No, no, stop that. That kind of talk just leads to crazy town, and I’m far too young to start going crazy. I should at least try to keep up the battle for my ever-slipping grasp on sanity for another hundred years—by then I’ll have lost everypony I love and I’ll have a good excuse. Then I can let myself go crazy! See what it’s like, let Celestia take care of me, declare chocolate mousse to be an independent nation... heck, I could even try that whole Nightmare thing. What would I call myself though? Nightmare Librarian? Eh, I’m going to have to work on that. I mean, who would be afraid of an evil librarian? Oh well, it might be fun! And then when I’m a thousand years old or so and I inevitably get bored of being crazy, I’ll just go sane again!”
She looked off into the distance, a mildly crazed gleam in her eye. “So very sane…”
Twilight pondered while tapping her hoof on the floor, head cocked to the side. “Though, instead of going through all that, maybe I should just start working on a way to keep my friends and family alive with me… I’m sure Cadance is working on something like that with Shining Armor. I mean, Celestia forbid he ever leave her—we’d have a huge Nightmare problem from that. Huh. I wonder what she’d call herself? Nightmare Hate? Nightmare Lust? Maybe Nightmare Fancy Cabinet! Oh well, maybe I can magically rewire the Elements to link their life force to mine? Or failing that, maybe necro...man…cy…” She trailed off.
At that moment, Alicorn Twilight noticed that her double had recovered. Only now, she was staring at Alicorn Twilight with her eyebrows raised about as far as they could go. She had also taken a few steps backwards in the direction of her closet. Alicorn Twilight stared at her unicorn self’s eyes for several moments in dead silence, until the situation clicked.
“Um…” Alicorn Twilight blushed a deep crimson as she scuffed her hoof against the floor. “I was doing that thing again where I say my inner monologue as an outer monologue, wasn’t I?”
Unicorn Twilight nodded mutely, slowly reaching for a broom.
“… Crab apples.” Alicorn Twilight took to the air, but not quite fast enough as the broom came down hard on her head several times. Yelping with each hit, Alicorn Twilight fell backwards into the portal behind her, uttering a final ‘meep’ as it vanished.
Unicorn Twilight nodded firmly, carrying her broom back inside. “And stay out!”
Twilight groaned, summoning an ice pack from her freezer to put on her head. “That is the last time I try to help my past alternate self with anything—that pony is crazy! Have fun figuring out Starswirl’s spell!”
She winced. She could hardly blame her past self. If she had been her, she probably would have done the same.
Her ear flicked as a strange noise filled the palace. She turned to the door to see a pony, clad in a suit of metal armor, colored gold and red which covered their entire body—tail included.
“Huh, what?”
The armored pony took a step forward. “I am Iron Mare!” she declared in a very familiar voice.
Twilight’s ear flicked as her eye twitched. “Oh… come on!”
I regret nothing!
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Dear, everyone knows there's no females on the internet! You must be a spy.
just kidding I know exactly how you feel. I liked the story.
5819851
Glad you enjoyed! ^^
Perfect!
5819885
Thank you! It was a lot of fun to write!
5819889 These types of stories are always fun to write!
5819894
Oh yes!
There are just far too many Twilights for this story to handle.
5819936
All the Twilights!
5819940 I wasn't ready for this!
And now all I can think of is
5819952
That song is STILL stuck in my head from last night.
5819946
No one is prepared...
derpicdn.net/media/W1siZiIsIjIwMTIvMDgvMTMvMDVfMDdfNTlfODEzXzczNDIzX19VTk9QVF9fIl1d/73423__safe_rainbow%2Bdash_vector_scared_artist-colon-saturtron_stage%2Bfright.png 5819993
Uh, Twilight? How long have you been working on this parallel-universe spell?
The perfect solution to pesky alternate selves!
Ruh roh.
5820050
Also, Nightmare Fancy Cabinet. Just...all of my yes. All of it.
5820097
^^ I was hoping someone would catch that!
But the solution is so simple Twilight! Just replace one of your alternate universe selves!
5820231 My Little Identity Theft, My Little Identity Theft...
Well that was fun. Now remind me why I'm not following you.
I'll see you at the next chapter.
5820249
I dunno ^^ You should I have funny fluffy stories!
5820272 I know it just blows my mind that I still haven't clicked that button yet... I'm gonna go do that now.
5820292
Yay!
Yay! Glad to see my silly skit filled out a bit more.
The new parts made me giggle. 
5820315
I'm glad! ^^
Dat ending!
You asked for it.
5820297 Admittedly I had trouble finding the button, I don't think I've followed anyone since the peripheral changed. Oh well, now I can excitedly await your next cute story.
I listen to my music on shuffle when I read fanfiction. I also decided to click on that link without turning off my music. At the same time as Iron Man started, Black Sabbath (their titular song) started playing from my music.
Would calling this ironic be...ironic? (because iron man)
5821080
That is serious ironic!
Twilight Zoned
That is niceee!!!
Every word was like magic.
5820104
So, when does Nightlight Sparkle arrive from the parallel universe where the affair with her sole bedside table works out?
5819851 Obviously GIRL stands for Guy In Real Life. Everyone knows that /s
Short, but sweet
GIRL = Guy In Real Life
and I regret nothing in reading it.
The voice at the beginning of the Iron Man song sounds more like a Dalek than like Iron Man.
But yeah, that was hilarious
.
This dances on being a troll fic... and I liked it.
A.G.
What is more insane than one insane Twilight? Two insane Twilights, only this one covered in armor!
Really off the wall here, Foals. I think my own sanity has been threatened...
Well, that was a fun little story to read.
Nice. Nightmare Librarian sounds like the worst Marvel supervillain name.
Now I am imagining a blue-latex wearing twilight sparkle flying through Manehattan screaming.
Nightmare Librarian: Your book is overdue!!!!!!
While throwing books at ponies....
By the way, this is awesome.
5822530
Hmm... you seem to have reached 1/4 Pinkie on the Insanity Scale! Damn.
Simply
5824860 If Foals continues to assault my mind like she has, I'll lose the other 3/4ths before long.
Short and funny. Loved it
of course Twilight Starkle invented a machine to travel dimenshions
5822492 That's exactly what popped into my head when I read that.
Neat little oneshot you have there, Foals!
Methinks that Twilight needs a therapist.