We follow the course of the cute couple, Twilight and Flash Sentry, though their years of dating. But from the couple, arises another couple, that slowly come together. Who are these two others? Read this breathtaking romance and you just might see!
This story is also published by moi on wattpad
I am proud to announce that thatoneguy82 is now the co-author of this fic!!!
Interesting idea for a story. I think you need to make the chapters larger. Also maybe go a bit more indepth on the characters emotions. Good start for a story. Good luck with the next chapter.
5524483
Thanks for the advice, I appreciate it
I like FlashLight. Not sure why, I just do.
5524503
IKR!!! :D
sure, flash appears shallow and cheesy, not to mention uneeded but that just means he has room for more character!
I am completely indifferent when it come to Flashlight romance. I don't hate it, but I don't like it either, I just shrug and move along.
Loved it. Can't wait for chapter two.
flashlight... more like
fleshlight amirite?
Hmmm I don't know where this is going but I like it!
5525013 ......................................................................................
Where's Spike?
Noticed a few errors, the biggest being statements like "the lavender ponies friends" not only does look like poor grammar, that kind of statement implies ther is more than on lavender pony.
If you're trying to say something is belonging to someone or something you say it like 'the lavender pony's friends'
I am looking forward the next chapter, here's to hoping Flash has a personality to hold interest of the readers.
5528398
oops
5528398
hypocrite much?
5532280 not a hypocrite, just someone trying to help others improve. I'm not an English major, but I do have a pet peeve about large numbers of little errors or glaringly large writing errors. I have a few stories up, and those have quite a few errors (in fact I just went through all of chapters of one of my stories and fixed all the errors I Noticed)
5532296 got it
This has some potential... Hope you put up the next chapter soon.
5832511 thank you! :)
You show good potential. I look forward to the next chapter.
6081495 Thank you
Not a bad start, should rename it to like 'Before The Date', maybe run it through something like Grammarly. But I would love to know how the date went.
I know that it's been 3 years, but I must ask, when is the next chapter being put up?