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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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6234233
No amount of Ron Paul could have prepared me for this sneak attack!
6234269 Really sorry about this, but can direct quotes from new chapters be put in spoiler tags?
6234370 Okay, yeah, that's probably a good idea. I wasn't thinking of how that comment would probably be visible to those who haven't gotten this far, yet. It's definitely for the best that it was deleted. Sorry about that.
Clever Twilight is clever.
Dammit, this is going to haunt me with what happens next till the next update. Can't wait for more keep being awesome.
Prepare. For. Epic. Shit. Storm. And. Revo.Lution.
Man this is getting good.....I'm eager to see what happens next now...
Okay first things first: Hi Spike! Nice to see you!
Second: Forget the clop, I wanna see more of this battle of will and intellect between Twilight and Celestia!
I mean brilliant on Twilight's part to come up with a failsafe but how was she able to keep it a secret, especially with her going to Celestia at least once a week (give or take)? So far the chapter seems to imply Celestia is using the spell over Twilight, especially with Twilight's comment about time flying and them just talking about nothing, but then again Celestia might not have put as much research into the spell as Twilight, learning the cracks and crevasses, but still Celestia should potentially be able to ask Twilight "Do you have a backup plan against me?/Explain your failsafe to me" and Twilight would have to spill the beans when under, unless she was entranced by someone else to protect against such an occurrence . I have a feeling a certain non-pony subject who happens to have access to a unique type of magic is going to be playing a role in this!
I'm looking at my pony site to get pony fix, while driving cross country, saw this update and immediately gasped. Can't wait to get to a hotel noooow~
media.giphy.com/media/7krwucod3Pzag/giphy.gif
Oh s**t, son!
I feel vaguely like I'm reading a hypnotism clop version of Death Note. And I am perfectly okay with that.
Tis is not the end...not even the beginning of the end...it is simply beginning of a new age...
This makes me happy.
I knew it was too easy. Twilight always has a backup.
My god, you truly surprised me with this one! I LOVE IT. You got me on my toes for the next one.
Okay! This is it! I am done with this fic!
Reason 1: Chapter 14 was probably the cause of death of at least 2 people, fapping themselves to death because of it´s lenght. (Huh . . . "length" )
Reason 2: Chapter 15 was so great! It had me on the edge of my seat the whole time! Thank you!
One little sidenote, however:
This part was a bit confusing. It just sounded strange and disrupted the flow between the paragraphes it was written,
Reason 3: After you fucked up every main character in the head, You are doing the same with us now. If I wouldn´t know better, I would bet that there is some way to cast this charm through written lines and we are all your puppets now, only reading lines you want us to remember to make us addicted to this story.
Which is why I will surely reconsider my first statement from before and come back as soon as I get a mail about the next update in a few seconds.
So I´ve got only 2 words for you: F-
I am awakened.
Forget the sex scenes. I just want to know what happens next. It's like a game if chess without being able to see the board and having no idea what the last 3 moves have been.
...But it was not, as some had predicted, the end of the world. Instead, the disaster was simply the prologue to another sexy chapter of pony mind-f**kery...
Totally saw that coming, but you are going to have to get pretty creative if you want me to accept that Celestia wouldn't find out about her back-up plans.
The parallels with DeathNote continue to mount. I love it
6234764 I LOLd at that one.
6234802
At the accusation of murder, the immature length joke, the bad writing of mine or the theory that we are all mind-fucked now?
6234824 A bit of the theory, but most of all the last part. xD
this feels like an excuse to just go back over what's already happened before
Oh Twi, thank the gods that you did this.
Deus ex twilight, the ultimate retcon!
I was kind of disappointed with the last chapter and it felt like a really annoying anti-climax. This chapter however renewed my hope. However, there are still a few plot holes that have been pointed out such as how no one else knew about this letter? Did she erase her own memory before executing the plan this she didn't know l, even if asked, "do you have any other plans?" She could legitimately respond: "None that I remember."
Wow, I'll go ahead and say I was not expecting this in the least and now I have absolutely no idea where any of this will be heading. You've taken my heart and twisted it and now I am addicted, thanks .
Here we go. Looking forward to more.
Keep up the good work. Deus tecum.
Will we see what exactly Celestia did to Twilight after awakening her in the previous chapter? Preferably in excruciating detail.
Perhaps a flashback, or in a form of a dream?
Damn Wintermist. Two chapter update?! You beautiful bastard.
6235519 Recovering her memory of what's happened is definitely one of Twilight's goals.
6234574 I have to admit I was laughing a little like the joker at the end of this chapter
You've really gone and done it this time. You've gone ahead and put me on the knife's edge of death. Chapter 15 put me in the hospital with that ending, and now this glorious confirmation of continuation just unplugged my life support. Now my only hope is for Wintermist M.D. to stroll by my room with the next chapter in an IV bag to resuscitate me using the knowledge implied by his PHD in Advanced Fapology. And yes, in my mind you are the most highly skilled and qualified Fapologist in all the land. And all of the nurses in your ICU are sexy horse women.
In case is wasn't obvious yet, I await the next installment with more eagerness than can be safely physically contained. Have a nice day, doctor.
can't wait for the next chapter
poor Zecora.... Twilight will have to make it up to her big time once she hads her memories back^^ And i hope she didnt tell Celestia about Luna while she was under her spell
A few of my thoughts..
One, I feel like Celestia basically mopped this up as quickly as possible. Probably didn't interrogate Twilight much at all, just gave her the order to forget everything that had happened, then used her to awaken the rest and had them forget as well, and sent them on their way with whatever was the most efficient means of replacing their memories of the past month or however long the Fic has taken place over.
I mean, the fact that she missed Zecora means that she didn't even -ask- Twilight who she'd Charmed, which obviously means that Luna is still charmed as well. She just assumed it was only the Mane Six.. which comes to think of it, means that Pure Heart or whatshisname is still charmed as well, meaning Twilight has two active mindslaves who have retained their memories of what she did too them, and six that have had their memories suppressed by either Celestia or Twilight herself.
This makes sense to me though, Celestia is keeping a secret too and she didn't have a lot of time to fuck around with the rest of the Mane Six crouching outside of her chambers, expediency was likely her only goal, and so her cleanup was -very- sloppy. Maybe she trusted that she could take care of any residual effects of Twilight's spree as they popped up, but I'm guessing that will ultimately be her downfall. Being an immortal god could definitely make you aloof and over-trusting in your own power, and even though Twilight shocked Celestia, I'm guessing that Celly isn't going to learn much from Twilight's ambush. But -we've- learned something.. that Celestia is immune to the Charm, or at least knows the proper way to defend against it.. which is disappointing, I have to admit, but not unexpected.
I'm looking very forward to more of this Fic, it's still got it's hooks in me and I congratulate Wintermist for their fantastic writing!
Hopefully before long, Twilight will have her stable of slaves back under her thrall, and Celly will find her ultimate downfall at the hoof of her own hubris..
Man, the last chapter had me as nervous as twilight in seeing what exactly would happen. Now that I've read this one, the claws have just further sunk in on reading this story. Hopefully Twilight will finally get her chance at having Celestia under her will. I really can't wait for the next part of the story
This is like Death Note, My Little Pony, and that game that Jibril and Fi (pronounced 'fee') made for Kuuhaku (BLANK) and Fi's human friend to play all had an orgy together and somehow had some sort of three parented baby.
What the fuck... This is more clever than Code Geass.
I just came harder at these last two non-clop chapters than I have with any clop chapters. This is getting ridiculously good.
PLEASE CONTINUE HARDER BETTER FASTER STRONGER.
6235659 To be fair Pure Heart was to return to exactly as he was, though we don't know how far the charm truly effects its victim. am sure Twilight with a fail safe had a guard for when and if she failed, such as forcing herself to forget as a possibility, perhaps Celestia didn't want to be more tempted than she already is, possibly she didn't wish to drill to deep. As for Luna she probably didn't even need to ask and surmised automatically that Luna was the one who weakened the Vault or Luna is simply keeping her mouth shut not wishing to give away that she is indeed under Twilight's charm as well and is waiting for Twilight to return before making any movements.
But your points may be valid yet, I am a little curious as to what Celly did to Twilight at her meetings aside talk am sure there is more to it. maybe some nice tea.... (who am i kidding?)
Okay, first of all, I didn't even get around to commenting on Chapter 14 before the main event dropped! Oh no!
I'll just have to finish writing that later though, because right now I'm just... Just...
I should have known it was too easy. I should have known.
My god, this is just absolutely insane. Celestia focused Twilight! Twilight was ready for this contingency! Mind-wiped Twilight is gonna have to pick up the pieces WHILE SHE'S UNDER CELESTIA'S CONTROL!
I'm sorry but I just don't have anything more constructive to say beyond HOLY SHIEEEEET.
EDIT: okay, I'm slightly more calmed down, so here it goes.
NO MORE SPOILER BARS
6234575
Luna must be an integral part to the backup plan. My best guess is, Twilight had Luna focus her (or had Zecora do it!), and commanded Twilight in such a way that only a direct and specific order would make Twilight spill the beans. Maybe when Celestia asked Twilight who she'd charmed, perhaps Twilight only responded with "Applejack, Rarity, Rainbow Dash, Fluttershy, and Pinkie Pie". Maybe Luna is still loyal, and Zecora obviously is, so we know that Celestia's interrogation must not have been perfect. After all, if Zecora is still charmed, it makes sense to believe that Luna is as well (and remember, Luna is currently charmed such that she only remembers being Twilight's servant while in her presence).
Celestia clearly has a more developed control over the charm. Firstly, she knows how to defend directly against it (and, in fact, must have been warded automatically because Twilight's surprise attack certainly didn't give her time to cast something). Also, Celestia must know how to remove the charm, because what would happen if Twilight said 'awaken' during a conversation with her friends? Obviously something was done to prevent the trigger word from activating (unless Twilight was commanded to simply never say the word 'Awaken', which is possible but seems too flimsy). This could be used to Twilight's advantage (once she figures out how to unlock her memories), because it means that Twilight could eventually learn to do the same. Deactivate the charm on herself, then cast a ward to protect against Celestia during Round Two. I can only imagine what Twilight will have to do next time around to successfully win. A counter-ward spell, the Elements of Harmony maybe?
So, what might Twilight's backup plan entail? First off, she'll probably need to hook back up with Zecora, then likely recharm her friends. That red-ribbon letter must include a copy of the charm, as well as her old notes on how it works. Twilight's old self is still in there somewhere, she's been having dreams! No doubt a gambit by Luna to help the process of remembrance along. After all that, she'll have to be super extra ultra careful next time around. Celestia has not only been made aware, she's taken control of the whole thing! She knows Twilight's intentions, seen all her tricks thus far (including the Elements of Harmony plan), probably seen her notes and such too...
God this is crazy. I can't even believe the curveball we've just been thrown. Shit's intense, yo'.
EDIT AGAIN:
6234769
This chapter has sent the fic into full psychological warfare, I-know-you-know-that-I-know, gambit-vs-gambit craziness. Even if and when Twilight gets back and takes over Celestia, how do we know that Celestia doesn't have her own contingency plans?
6234778 Both Twilight and Celestia are smart, use of their abilities and the resources at hand can prove to be the changers of the game. The charm can be used by any caster, I suspect. Further more I think Twilight is more into details then Celestia she seems more into the larger frame. (personality wise.)
Oh shit sucka! This chapter blew my socks right off! Oh wait...I wasn't wearing any socks.
6235822 well.... that was a stupid move on her part^^
It's not ogre. It's NEVER ogre.
...
Have I mentioned I hate stories that pull this stuff? Cause honestly I'm just... Disappointed. You moved away from practicing with the charm and using all that fun stuff to something literally out of an anime.
There went my enjoyment of the fic. I'll be in the unpopular corner of people who hate this story.
6236625 That's fair. With any periodically released series, you'll sometimes find what you hoped for and what the writer intended part ways as it goes on, and I hope you had fun with it up until now.
I will say though that this isn't a big move away from exploring the charm, or the mind control. Even a story as heavily shaded towards clop as this one needs a kick from the plot side of things every now and then to keep it interesting; I'm really looking forward to the new ways that I can play with the charm, from this new angle.
Maybe with a little time, it'll come around to something you enjoy again - it's definitely your call as to whether you want to stick around or call it quits here. Either way, thanks for coming this far with it, and thanks for letting me know what you made of it.
6236698
Well the main problem is that, even despite the word count, it feels rushed. Around the part where she got Luna under the charm was when the rushing began, cause before then you had the great opportunity to pace and build and explore, but diverted away to a hastily rushed plot to entrance Celestia.
Now because of the "reset" it feels like you understood you were rushing and threw everything back to square one in order to pace yourself again. And I don't mind the future bits, but it's just gonna be a rehash of everything that happened. She'll go to AJ first, then slowly get the others, then communicate with Luna and Zecora, and then try to entrance Celestia. Again.
Here, I don't know if you want any ideas or stuff like that cause it's your story, but try diverting focus a bit. What I mean is have Twilight focus on new ponies, ones closer to the princess, or in the gaurd. Maybe Cadance and Shining, since Twilight could use them as a diversion.
I hope this continues, but unless everything, or just about everything, about the format of this story changes I'm not gonna follow along that well.
6236625
Well, think of this as an opportunity for us to witness the charm from the intimate perspective of our protagonist being controlled. Because I've been figuring that Twilight will need to experiment more than ever as she develops a way to free herself and beat Celestia.
But I do get what you mean, about the pace. It doesn't bother me so much as it does you, but I can see where you're coming from.
Hah, now I wonder if Pure Heart might not be as fixed as Twilight thought! One day he'll show up at Twilight's doorstep swearing fealty to her.
M/F clop, in this fic? It's more likely than you think!
6236625
6236698
Funny enough, I absolutely adore these kinds of twists. I'm a huge fan of the anime that made them into an art form (and yes, I'm totally busting my hip out writing a crossover with at least one of these twists per chapter on average)