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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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I need more. That is all.
It looks like, soon, Twilight's going to war. Small war, but war, nonetheless. She has my support.
6287295 Jees, slow down Wintermist, i cant read this fast...
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Yes, war will come
Twilight, why haven't you asked Zecora to make a potion to help reteve memories or something like that? She might not be able to help, but it would be a smart move of your part to at least ask
well I can honestly say, the other is both very through and very ill informed. Then again considering the others status in society, she doesn't need to be too, knowledgeable on the charm not to mention her first victim was away for awhile meaning she doesn't know anywhere as much as twilight. Like when awakened order don't ask and blocks being able to effect the awakened state. in addition she clearly though twilight was corrupted fast and used it just for her own pleasure not originally as research. Also good on you Zecora.
That said the other knows that the charm isnt perfect from her own experience she has been making sure twilight still hasn't questioned or even thought about "the request" since, but the others down fall will be her biggest strength, her status and mind, her knowledge will make her somewhat arrogant, her status leaves points to exploit. After all those near the top or at the top always seek a moment at the bottom that's when twilight can strike. Its known that commands can be put on a delay to activate under specific conditions.
Its like a game of chess but twilight doesn't have her piece to start and much fewer, but quality overcome quantity. The other may be more knowledgeable in life but twilight is younger has everything to lose and more importantly a drive to recover what was lost. I personally think that the key to the others downfall will be in the same very spell. When the other seeks a moment of release from her podium up high thats when twilights mind shall strike and the hammer will fall.
Great chapter I really enjoyed reading it as you could probably guess that said this is turning into code geass the other is the King Charles of Britannia and twilight is Lelouch Lamperouge the disgraced price even has the two season arc 1 season up to the face off with the other which twilight loses cause her memory to be wiped to then be help back by her allies (zecora).
6287526 I don't think a potion will work on the charm at least not yet maybe when she gets her past self's notes then maybe.
This story is like a drug, and it's killing me.
10/10
Wintermist how do you deal with being such a fast and tallented author?
Your story is 20% more awesome than any other mind control MLP Fic I've read. The porn is great but the plot is better, the in depth look at how characters act and interact, how they justify their new behaviours and thoughts based on the level of control they've been put under Its a wonderful character study just as much as a great story
And more Zecora is always ALWAYS welcome =3
Now it make me think about the previous chapter, mainly thanks to Mizu post... Celestia is the Princess of the sun, almost one must be able to see her unless she use a spell or charmed Ponyville and Canterlot. How Celestia managed to enter Cherilee class and make Twilight wet herself? Is no one safe from Princess Molestia?
Twilight blushed at the sight of Big Mac's muscled body. Have her tastes also been tampered with?
Well... strange as it may sound, Celestia may have a logical reason for screwing with Twilight's orientation, assuming that's what happened. Unless they have a spell that allows two mares to have a foal together, having her be in a straight relationship at some point will help perpetuate her family line. She's obviously still attracted to Zecora, though, so it would be more like an inclusion of possible males in her choice of partners.
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Hmm. Did Twilight do that to her friends? Or was Celestia unable to resist...
I just adore this story, it makes me really think. I've an analytical mind similar to Twilight's so the fact she thought so much of this thru before facing Celestia is impressive, and the fact Celestia doesn't have a analytical mind like Twi's is evident in the various loopholes and breadcrumbs she's been able to find so far. I just love it, and this certainly made for the best bday gift I could have stumbled across by accident lol
I love this damn fic! This is a psychological masterpiece, my good author. Not only did I greatly enjoy this chapter, I was constantly on edge waiting for something bizarre to happen that Twilight wouldn't have been aware was out of the ordinary. Of course, someone could have blinded her to their presence, but if that is the case I didn't spot any clues about it. By the time the chapter ended, I was literally relieved for Twilight. I need more! MOAR!
Every chapter in the "Under New Management" arc has left me on pins and needles while reading them. There's a tension in carefully reading every sentence for any hint of what is coming next, that few Fics are able to summon in me. From what I've read of other comments, this is common among other readers of this Fic as well.
It seems to be becoming more and more apparent that my ( and other commenter's ) theory that the "Other" was -very- sloppy in their cleanup of the mess that Twilight created is correct. The only other real explanation, and one I've seriously entertained, is the idea that the "Other" is attempting to guide Twilight back into the use of the charm in a way that would make Twilight more useful to the "Other". Like, rather than just letting her run willy nilly with it, she sort of creates a path down which Twilight must follow to regain what she had, but in the way that the "Other" finds most beneficial to their own interests.
But like I said, while I've been told by the author that the "Other" is not a stupid being, I believe that they might be so aloof and self-assured, and also quite rushed in their need to fix the problem as quickly as possible, that they simply didn't consider means by which Twilight might regain her use of the charm. Or assumed that if any problems with it cropped up in the future they'd be able to solve them as they came.
I'm very dearly hoping that these mistakes and assumptions become the downfall of the "Other".
Very interesting that Twilight is considering that her past self might have been corrupted or otherwise dangerous. I'm also wondering if she'll make progress with restoring memories. While she never learned to counter the spell, she hadn't been looking specifically to undo its memory erasure. And we do know it's not unbeatable; Zecora's curse took seemingly equal precedence, and Celestia and Luna seemed to know some sort of general protection that could hold it off for a bit.
"Hey Applejack, I'm here to help with your chores like you asked! Boy, the new farmhands sure are energetic!"
"Rarity, no need to thank me for helping model your new dresses. Anything for a friend! And if I may, this outfit is very unique."
"Thanks for bringing the cupcakes, Pinkie, It just wouldn't be a picnic without them. What's that, we don't have any plates? No problem, we can just eat these right off each others' breasts!"
"What's that, Rainbow Dash? You'd like me to be your audience while you demonstrate some new Wonderbolt techniques? Absolutely! Ah~, that's sure to wow Spitfire during the next training camp."
"I really appreciate your invitation to the spa, Fluttershy. I've needed a chance to relieve some stress - right there, Aloe, oh yeah, perfect - and these dildos of yours really hit the spot!"
Yep, absolutely nothing out of the ordinary.
Excellent word choice there. The double-meaning there with "sunlight" chasing the visions away just struck me as really spiffy.
Points for thinking about every possibility, Twilight, but incorrect in this case. You already charmed Zecora through her dreams, forest be damned!
It's definitely interesting that Twilight has discovered so much about who she was controlling before she has had a chance to get her memories back. She's gotten a strong inkling of the sheer depths of depravity that they had all been getting into. She's seen the fetish-wear, she's witnessed Zecora's obsessive devotion. She even knows that she charmed Luna, a pony of grand and sacred power.
Now, she wonders just what 'past Twilight' had been getting into. The letter had simply said that she'd discovered the charm's power and tried to use it on the original creator. Now, Twilight wonders if she might actually be the one who needed to be stopped.
The delicious paranoia. At this point she just doesn't have any idea what to think or who to trust. I wonder how the (presumably) imminent unlocking of memories will effect her. Will those old memories come with the character development that they had wrought, the twisted morality and satisfaction in enslaving her friends? Or will the memories horrify her, bring her to the edge of simply turning herself in for the greater good?
Perhaps the only thing to give her pause will be the knowledge that the Other is just as immoral. "Better to become a monster myself than let another carry on with impunity". I am sure it will be thoroughly enjoying to witness.
Very nice. Very nice. There's so much tension. What's gonna happen when someone sees Zecora at Twilight's house? Who's been charmed to report back to celestia?
6287457 We shall march with her.
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i.imgur.com/fjpr80g.gif
Who wants to live forever anyways? TO WAR!
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And my vivuzela
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And don't forget about me!
You know, it's kind of funny that Luna was the only one trying to stop all of this, and she's charmed by both known users! Very interested to see what happened with her, as she has been conspicuously absent. Did Celestia reassert control? Is she in hiding? As the enabler for unlimited distance charming, she's key in the conflict. She's also probably the only one who could undo it all: Who else has the knowledge or power to develop a counterspell without also being too tempted by the power it offers?
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My money is on that she's still 'travelling Equestria', as an excuse to avoid Celestia. In other circumstances Celestia might find this odd, but probably she's just happy Luna is out of the way so she can play with her toys without needing to give Luna commands as well. Very similar to how Spike was absent for Part 1 of this story on Twilight's side.
If Princess Luna is still aware of Twilight's dominion over her (that is, she's still loyal), I bet she's waiting for the right opportunity to return just like Zecora. She's probably been watching Twilight's dreams closely, waiting for signs that she has gained back her memories. Hell, Luna might be responsible for the wet dreams Twilight keeps having, an attempt to jog her memories or at least prime her for their return.
Luna: best minion.
I've never been put on the edge of my seat so thoroughly, much less by a clopfic. This is truly a narrative wonder.
So, Twilight is now learning about her things from an outsiders perspective, that'll hopefully give her the morality needed to not abuse the charm again. Or abuse it in better ways, somewhat
Yeah, that you know of :p
Also, I really need more of this story. I cannot go without it for long. I require substance
I can't possibly have enough of this story in my life. This is basically literary crack. And Wintermist, you are my dealer. And if I remember my past comments correctly, you are also my primary care physician. You are a writer of many talents, you know that, right?
6287599 No idea! Well, it'll be sometime in the next fortnight I expect. Depends how much extra writing I get done each day (I've been running at double my usual average for the last month or so), and how long the chapter naturally shakes out at.
6287685 Well, at the point where the ponies left to confront Celestia, Rarity, Rainbow and Zecora had been shorn. Applejack started out that way, and Twilight decided she liked it. Pinkie and Fluttershy hadn't yet, nor Twilight herself. Luna I kind of pictured as naturally that way, rather than her having a billowing cloud of stars and planets in her underwear.
6290261 That kind of reaction gives me a little sparkle of joy inside. There's no fun quite like toying with your readers.
6291030 Being a doctor makes it easier to be a dealer. I suspected you wouldn't be heartbroken to see more Zecora.
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Now all I can imagine is Luna with magical flowing hair down there.
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Oh god this mental image.
What the fuck guys.
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Could you imagine how frustrating it would be if it was actually a portal to the stars or something?
6294223 6294220 Taste the universe.
I really hope to see Luna again soon....
And i feel sorry for Zecora. I hoppe twilight will properly reward her for her loyalty when she has her memories back^^
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You realize that fun with the Princess' hair must become a thing at some point now, right? This is too important to pass up. What does cosmos hair taste like? What does that stuff feel like?
Does Celestia's curtains match her drapes?
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I think it's become clear by now that the Charm has some kind of corruptive factor going on for the one who uses it. Whether it's a supernatural effect or purely mundane, the ultimate result is identical: anyone who uses the charm quickly becomes addicted to it. Absolute power corrupts absolutely, and all that.
Celestia probably recognized this, and swore off using the charm many centuries ago. However, Twilight kind of forced her hand, and she had to use it in order to stop her student. At first she probably just wiped their memories and sent everyone home, but as we can see, that didn't last. Using the charm even that one time was enough to get Celestia hooked again, and now she's doing the same kind of power-tripping that Twilight was.
Twily dun goofed.
6296134 That can't be right; Celestia's been screwing Luna recently. She might or might not have been keeping it to just Luna, but she definitely has been using the charm.
On the other hand, maybe we are now seeing why Celestia has a nearly 100% approval rating...
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We don't actually know it was recent. There was never a time reference given on her screwing Luna.
6298265 Huh, you're right. I just reread Luna's whole chapter, and there was nothing.
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My interpretation was that she was charmed in the pre-NMM days. The main evidence for this is her speech patterns while entranced. She talks in a very archaic manner (in particular the speech at the beginning).
Also, the book with the charm written in it was found in the ruins of the Castle of the Royal Pony Sisters (which, as far as we know, was abandoned following Nightmare Moon's banishment). It could have been planted there, but the introduction of such a character would bring a whole new slew of questions into this.
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And now we know why Luna didn't feel loved anymore.
Celestia stopped using the charm on her, but some of the needs were still buried in her mind. Now Luna felt like she was missing something but she didn't know what, until it finally drove her insane.
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Luna has some rather unusual body patterns. For instance, did you know the black splotches on her butt are part of her coat, not her Cutie Mark?
derpicdn.net/img/view/2014/12/22/790415__safe_solo_princess+luna_screencap_blank+flank_twilight%27s+kingdom_tired.png
Luna has natural ass patches. Like big round targets for a paddle.
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Yeah that was my guess, too. I was guessing that Nightmare Moon was related to the charm as either a screwed up command or some strange reaction as she tried to fight it.
That was fun, may I have another? Looking forward to more.
Keep up the good work. Deus tecum.
Chapter 19: Uninvited Guests is finished! It will be posted today at 8pm GMT / 7pm British Summer Time.
New chapter, go!
Huh... did Celestia forget Zecora while she was wiping everybody's memories and preventing Twilight from fantasizing about them? That seems unlikely, because "name all the ponies you have charmed" should have been her very first order.
Okay, I had a question around here when reading through the first time. Almost got me to make an account just so I could post a comment.
...what the hell?! Do people actually get off on this kind of fucked up situation?! This shit literally made a couple nights be hard to get to sleep! I mean, holy crap!
Is it somehow FUN to worry about something like this???
Yeah, me too!
I'm not even kidding, after reading these couple of chapters I spent a long time wondering how it would feel like to KNOW someone was messing with your head, literally controlling your thoughts. And that turns out to be one of the freakiest things I've ever wished I could un-think!
Now besides that bit from last chapter...and this part in here:
Anyways, I think my favorite part in here the first time, and still, was talking to Big Mac. It was another particularly well done piece, and very emotional.
I was honestly about ready to cry myself at this point. It's a really touching scene, and has the perfect blend of confusion from Big Mac, and frustration born from terror for Twilight.
Of course, the talk with Zecora later didn't go at all the same way, or at all like Twilight expected, but it was sure fun for us!
So I've lost count how many times I've said this, but Wintermist has done a really good job once again.
....but seriously, dude, you made me wonder if I can keep reading until the end, or if you'll literally scare me off.
He's pissed.
...
6287682 Twilight never did confirm or deny if she was attracted to colts though, so I would think not. I also wonder if maybe this time she'll charm Big Mac too.
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It probably was... but Zecora is a Zebra, not a pony.
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Ehhh, doesn't sound right to me. "Oh no, my sister doesn't make me verbally degrade myself and worship her as my absolute superior anymore. I should stage a coup based on the idea that I'm underappreciated." Doesn't quite fit, does it?
My suspicion is that Celestia screwed up, thus causing Nightmare Moon. Maybe she didn't clean up Luna's mental state properly after one of her little humiliation sessions, leaving the conscious luna with the nagging feeling that she was the "lesser" Princess and not an equal co-ruler, leading to festering resentment and finally full-blown psychosis. I could definitely see Celestia stopping the use of her charm after inadvertently causing that, much easier than I can see Luna having a need to be degraded by her sister that goes unfulfilled after Celestia stopped using her charm.
And the only reason why I'm presupposing that Celestia did stop using her charm at some time in the past, is the implied fact that Twilight was not already under its influence when she confronted Celestia.
There areare a lot rhymes in here that do not look easy. Probs to you on that.
*loading my shotgun* Go Ahead Bigmac....I Cover your Flank >/
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Is it fun? Is it something to get off on?
It's a story. And a good one.
Consider Code Geass: You find a power of limited mind control. You have a country that is messed up, with the rulers in charge that are horrible. You find that you have been affected by this mind control yourself. You are trying to make the country better. What do you do?
Consider Harry Potter and the Natural 20, year 2 and on: You have a police officer that finds that your memories have been altered, and do not match your files. You make a test recording on a Walkman, and a few days later hear your own voice telling you something you don't remember. You know that someone is able to alter memories and hide crimes. What do you do?
Consider Death Note: One person wants to improve the country and reduce crime, with the tool of killing people who get away with it. One person wants to solve a mass murder with a horrible hidden weapon of death. Which is the better person / better side?
Is the clop in this story in the way? ...
I'd say about 80% of it is in the way of the story, and skippable. And the other 20% is the story -- the slow gradual loss of morals and self control. Memory loss, mind control, and death of personality -- EVERYTHING from those other mind-vs-mind stories at once, with stakes as high as can be.
When I say I'm here for the plot, I'm making fun of words. But the story is excellent, and ...
I can't say more yet. I'm reading the story on a kindle, and coming back here for the comments. Anything else I'd say would spoil upcoming chapters.
Just ...
No, Celestia is NOT holding an idiot ball. That's all I will say.