• Member Since 15th Feb, 2012
  • offline last seen 21 minutes ago



Ponyville's school teacher has it rough. The long hours, low pay, and lack of recognition are getting to her. On top of that, she's recently developed a little "drinking" problem...

A comedy.

Now with reading

Chapters (5)
Comments ( 170 )

I haven't read it and I'm already faving it.

EEEYUP faving.

one again, another fine start from a fine writer :pinkiehappy:

She just needs to think of it like a second job. In one, she's a bloodsucking monster, the terror of children everywhere. And her other job is a schoolteacher.

My God this story is actually happening. I have a McDonalads Cheerilee on my desk, and I swear it keeps looking at me...

The Proper term is Vampony

494554 Don't you mean "One where she's a bloodsucking monster who inspires terror in children and adults alike, and another where she's a vampire"


but no, this is an interesting concept so I shall read it now :U

Yea, I favorited it instantly when I saw it come up. So yea, What is this about staking a vampire only restoring the following two tiers of vampires? I suppose if we want to bring logic/physics/biology into it, It might have something to do with a virus which mutates when it is passed on, and after two jumps it is too different for whatever effect kills it to happen. Or maybe its the plot convenience dragon again :P

Sounds interesting, tracked.

We may go there in a later chapter.

I remember the vampires... 'course, they were called 'Great Vampires' back then, and they had the mass of a small mountain, but close enough.

Also, there was that one time, in Venice...


Because I am not a fan of Slayer. Besides, whats more relevant than The Vampire himself?

I wish I knew. I pretty much just throw out names of stuff I've heard of and hope nobody notices the fact that I'm spewing bull.

Interesting. Now I'm going to have go read that other story of yours.

I want more. Plus, I want this featured.

Tell your friends. I'd be okay with a feature.

Really, Really, okay.


Well, at least she doesn't sparkle.

494642 No, I deliberately subverted a bait-and-switch comparison as a joke.


A bait-and-switch deliberately subverted by a bait-and-switch? That's pretty hardcore.


495305 That's, like, a whole 'nother level of irony. Like, six level deeper than I could ever hope to comprehend.

Bouncing baby bunnies being bitten

That T-shirt is awesome.

Good work on this chapter! Vampire Cheerilee is definitely something new.

What kind of paradox would occur if Cheerilee were to turn Valiant into a vampire at this point?

It would be interesting to explore the idea that they somehow create a vampire loop and ended up turning each other.

Honestly, though, I think I just go another round of Valiant being a dick.


Narwhals are fucking awesome

the ponies have spoken they want more valient

Narwhals, Narwhals!
Swimmin' in the ocean,
causin' a commotion
'cause they are so awesome!
Narwhals, Narwhals!
Pretty big and pretty white,
they'd beat a polar bear in a fight!
Like an underwater unicorn,
they have a kickass facial horn!
They are the Jedi of the sea!
"They stop Cthulhu from eatin' me."
They are Narwhals!
Just don't let 'em touch your balls!
They are Narwhals!
Inventors of the shish kabob !

*ahem* I mean, um, good chapter...

...You jerk. Now that's stuck in my head again.

501582 Yes. When the word "narwhals" came up I heard that in my head. :pinkiehappy:

Also, good chapter!

501582 I had to start listening to that when it came up :rainbowlaugh:

“Come to the dark side, Cheerilee,” called Valiant from the other room.  “It’s pretty cool, not gonna lie.  We have parties every Saturday and go bowling once a month.”

I may not be Cheerilee, but I shall take you up on that offer :moustache:

Nice goen you have a 100% positive rating on this nice job. I might have to read this.

I'd buy that narwhal shirt. Well, I probably wouldn't, but I'd certainly take a free one.

Poor Cheerilee. Carnivory is a terrible thing for a pony to have to cope with. And the similarity between filling small minds and emptying small hearts is best not explored any deeper. That way lies madness.:pinkiecrazy:

503100 DONT JINX IT!

Woo! Loving it! Keep the awesome flowing, you're doing a great job with this.

Now I'm envisioning a quadriplegic as a more competent vampire slayer than Valiant. Unless you tip them over, I suppose.

I laughed way too hard at that picture.

I'm going straight to hell. Who's joining me? We can be Hell-mates together!

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