• Member Since 10th Feb, 2014
  • offline last seen May 21st, 2021

Michael Hudson


Original Works. It was a good run.

Comments ( 56 )

Inspired, shamefuly, by this song. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JVZC3-KCcM8

2/10 do you even English? Is that your idea of a hyperlink? Would not recommend. Disliked, reported, flagged for terrorism.
fc05.deviantart.net/fs71/f/2014/007/1/4/burn_it_to_the_ground_by_bolt187-d71awpx.jpg

But to be serious:
A nice and short little feelgood story, although I felt like I was a bit too tired when reading it to properly follow what was happening.

Other than that: I dunno, would've liked to see something a tad more original than "human-obsessed Lyra". But that's just me.

Hint: use this link instead: (without the spaces)
[ url=https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JVZC3-KCcM8]Taylor Swift - Shake It Off[/url ]

Majin Syeekoh
Moderator

Cool!

It got published quickly!

that was a very good story and I like the song you chose was a very good taylor swift song:twilightsmile:

4978713 One of the only. At least as of late.

Human-obsessed Lyra is a tired, overdone fandom cliche and isn't actually funny anymore. F- for bad fanfic cliche.

4978744 That seems like a rude reason to downvote a fic, especially since it wasn't used for comedy.

“Well if your legs hurt that much, you could come back to Vinyl’s and I’s to rest. However Bonbon, you’re paying me in sweets for having embarrassed myself like this.”

This reads kinda like it's Vinyl speaking since the previous line was a reply to her. You should specify that it's Octavia to avoid confusion.

4978759 In the first place, that wasn't the only reason I downvoted it. It was a terrible story, with characters acting like jerks for no other reason than you needed them to. But the "Lyra obsessed with humans" cliche is a personal pet peeve. It has to be done REALLY well to be excusable, and here? It wasn't.

Also, this read like a fanfic of a fanfic. Which is another pet peeve of mine.

4978816 That I understand. Thank you for the feedback.

4978900 Damnit! I'd avoided the video, and I knew I would have a reason!

That awkward moment when the pony in the cover art has two cutie marks

:trollestia::trollestia::trollestia:

4979472 Ponies always have cutie marks on both sides of their flanks. Lesson Zero has a great overhead shot shwoing that.

4979472
4979554

There's an even better one in Read it and Weep: One scene has Rainbow Dash pacing back and forth and we get a really clear shot of both sides.

Notably, not only do they have two marks but one is reversed, typically the left one. Which is why Vinyl Scratch is usually depicted with an inverted eight note. In her canon appearances she is always seen facing the left and fans just assumed it was supposed to be that way. Octavia on the other hand is usually facing right, so her treble cleff is the right way. An interesting exception is Filthy Rich who has inverted dollar signs on his right flank and true facing ones on his left. (Even though the dollar sign on his tie changes as he turns around, meaning it probably isn't an animation error.)

This implies ponies have one "dominant" cutie mark, kinda like how we have one dominant hand.

4979554 irk... so annoying:ajsleepy:

4980080 not you, the ponies having two cutie marks :rainbowlaugh:

i have one idea for the ending "EVERYPONY DO THE FLOP!"
(Whump!)
ZZZzzz...

4978744 Human-obsessed Lyra does actually continue to be popular, how exactly does this in itself make a story bad?

4978816 Ah, wait, that was just your personal opinion and decided it should be everyone else's as well. Gotcha.

I'm not trying to start anything, but you seem to pop up like a sore thumb commenting about how much you hate certain cliches done in fics that obviously fit certain cliches. That's like walking into the line of fire and complaining that you got hit.

Damn, this town seems rather intolerant. I was kinda hoping that Lyra would finish her dance when the song ended and then yell out to everyone. "This is me, fuck you all.":twilightsmile:

4980948 Hehe, I'l admit, that may have been funny.

The day Lyra learns twerking is the days pigs will fly. Oh, and if flying pigs appear, then may Celestia help us all....

4980784 Newsflash: people who don't like something are as entitled to their opinion, and their right to express it, as people who DO like the same thing.

That was short and funny I like

Was Lyra doing Caramell Dansen?

She looked down at her leg and the light burn that had occurred due to a stallion forcing Lyra down

Makes me wonder what happened.
But a fun little story regardless :twilightsmile:

4981205 Newsflash: If you don't like something based on premise alone, how about... Oh I don't know, just don't read it? Saves you the obvious pain and torture of reading such obviously shit fics that you so love to despise, and saves everyone else the trouble of a pointless comment announcing you don't
Ike something. Everybody wins. :ajbemused:

4981984 And exactly where in the story description does it explicitly say "Contains human-obsessed Lyra and ponies acting like jerks"?

4981967 Spilled hot coffee. That's why it's a light burn instead of something actually worrisome.

Never change, Lyra. Never change.

The song's alright. The video is terrifying.

4982807 Hence why I have never watched the video.

Well if your legs hurt that much, you could come back to Vinyl’s and I’s to rest.

Damnit, why?! Why does this have to be the grammar error? :flutterrage::flutterrage::flutterrage::flutterrage::flutterrage:

I do believe that life hates me. Tell me, would you say "You could come back to I's to rest."? NO! Of course not! This is the one thing that I hate the most out of every single, possible grammar error that one can make. :twilightangry2::twilightangry2::twilightangry2:The word is my because you would say "You could come back to my house to rest." Just never, ever use I!!!!:raritydespair: Oh, and one other thing, I's isn't even a freaking word!!!!:raritycry::raritycry::raritycry::raritydespair::raritydespair::raritydespair:


Also, I do apologize if this came off as attacking you, or your story, but it's just a huge pet peeve of mine. Aside from that, ahem, error, to put it nicely, I really did like your story which is why I'm still letting it pass submissions in The Hot Muffins. However, please, please, please, fix that error as soon as you can.:scootangel:

5051414 Normally I would say yes, thank you, and immediately proceed to fix it. However, this is not an error. You are correct that if Octavia had simply said, I's house, it would be an error. However, she said Vinyl and I's. In proper grammer, if you are to list multiple people, you do it with their name first, and then I. I got ripped into for this for years by my grammer teacher of a grandmother, so I know what I am talking about. Also, spellcheck doesn't call I's, as it is merely a possessive of I, which would normally be mine, but grammatically, I can't change it.

5051693 :facehoof::facehoof::facehoof::facehoof::facehoof::facehoof::facehoof: No! That's not true! It doesn't matter that 'Vinyl's' proceeds 'I's'. In either case it is incorrect. Here's an explanation: (no it isn't mine, I took it from a website)

The two personal pronouns I and me are often used wrongly, usually in sentences in which I is being used with another noun. Here are some tips to help you get it right:

Use the pronoun I, along with other subjective pronouns such as we, he, she, you, and they, when the pronoun is the subject of a verb:

He went to bed.

We waited for the bus.

Clare and I are going for a coffee.

In the last example, the pronoun I, together with the proper noun Clare, forms the subject of the sentence, so you need to use I rather than me.

Use the pronoun me, along with other objective pronouns such as us, him, her, you, and them, when the pronoun is the object of a verb:

Danny thanked them.

The dog followed John and me to the door.

In the last example, the pronoun me, together with the proper noun John, forms the object of the verb follow, so you need to use me rather than I.

Use the pronoun me, along with other objective pronouns such as us, him, her, you, and them, when the pronoun is the object of a preposition:

Rose spent the day with Jake and me.

Me, together with Jake, forms the object of the preposition with, so you need to use the pronoun me rather than the pronoun I.

An easy way of making sure you’ve chosen the right pronoun is to see whether the sentence reads properly if you remove the additional noun:

√ I am going for a coffee

X Me am going for a coffee

√ Rose and I went for a coffee

X Rose and me went for a coffee

√ The dog followed me

X The dog followed I

√ Rose spent the day with me

X Rose spent the day with I

Sorry to disappoint you and all, but if your grandmother thinks that what you wrote is correct, then she's an idiot. And a horrible grammar teacher. Oh, and one more thing, spell check is NOT, I repeat, NOT always correct. It can miss things.

5051737 Okay, you decided to take me almost having a joking response with something I believed correct and decided to be a little less then polite (to put it nicely) in your reply. Honestly, the change should be to our's, unless I absolutely have to clarify that it is Vinyl and Octavia's house. I'm sorry you decided this offends you so much to attack my dead grandma.

5051747 Almost joking?! Seriously?! If that was almost joking then I'm a mouse! :rainbowlaugh: That was anything but almost joking! You sounded cocky as hell! Especially with this line:

I got ripped into for this for years by my grammer teacher of a grandmother, so I know what I am talking about.

And the change wouldn't be to 'our's' it would be to 'OUR'!:facehoof::facehoof::facehoof::facehoof::facehoof: As to the whole grandmother thing, I'm sorry, I may have been a bit harsh, but still, seriously?! If she were a half decent grammar teacher then she would have known that what you wrote was incorrect.:facehoof::facehoof:

5051769 I was talking spoken language for the change(I did not get into writing anywhere near soon enough for her to read any), and I am sorry that in the heat of my response I put our's instead of our. And any cocky persona I put on for my response was for the joke, or did not mean to intended as such. Once more though, perhaps you are the one that needs to calm down. I have only attacked you on coming across as rude, where as you have been insulting me and my family personally, for a small grammar error.

5051797 *sighs* Okay, look. I've had a bit of a bad day in class, and I know that's no excuse. I took it out on you, your family, and your story when I should have been calm, and considerate with my comments. Therefore, I would like to apologize for any offensive things I said. However, I will still stand by the fact that the grammar in that sentence is wrong. I did not mean to attack your grandmother in order to prove my point. It was stupid and downright nasty. In short, I was an ass. All I can do is beg for forgiveness and continue saying: I'm so, so, so sorry!:raritycry:

5051813 An apology was all I was looking for. In fact, my second response was going to call you an ass. However, after plenty of anger issues in my past (I can completely empathize with lashing out after a bad day) I've learned to censor my rage, or attempt to be funny through rage reviews. I simply suggest recognizing when you may be in a foul mood and ready to lash out, or when something annoys you, and tread lightly. There have been several stories of mine (Will to Wane and Heat in a Bottle immediately come to mind) where I've known the comment to be constructive, and have had to hold myself back to see that.

5051826 Yeah, I know. Usually I can do a better job than what I did I feel really horrible about what I said. Is there any way I can make it up to you?:fluttercry:

5051865 Give me a hug, take this cookie, and go read Community Service, One Minute of Chaos, OR One Minute to The Game to see if you like more of my work. The first two are mandatory, the last one is me being a self promoting bastard.

5051888 *hugs and takes the cookie* I'll go read them as soon as I finish my dinner:twilightsmile:

Loved it, link died.
Think you ment this.

5190077 Jesus that is big in the summary. Thank you. :twilightsmile:

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